revamped! 28/11/2020
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Closing the door to her car, Jade arrives at her home almost soundlessly, smiling faintly to herself from the events that happened at Tori's house earlier. Little did she know that the smile had been on her face for perhaps the whole ride, only fading to a complete thin line the moment she stepped out of the car to the sight of her darkened home. She didn't know what state of mind she was in when she was back at Tori's, but she absolutely enjoyed it, and wanted nothing more than for it to happen again, somehow. And by the looks of it, Tori seemed to enjoy it as well, at least she hoped so𑁋she felt the slight anxiety that she freaked the brunette out.
However, as it happens with a person like her, she begins to overthink the situation𑁋the panic rising in her mind if what she did was entirely controlled. It clearly wasn't, and she felt scared that if going to Tori's house was the right decision or not. What was her purpose of being there anyways? To dance in Tori's arms? To feel happy for once? Or is it too feel comfort in someone's arms? Or feeling joy? Feeling that the smile on her face was actually real?
She had the opportunity right then and there to let out how she felt, but Tori's aura seemed to trap her there entirely. There was no doubt in her mind that she grew a liking towards Tori, and she wasn't sure whether or not her feelings towards her is entirely because she admired Tori's personality and beauty. No, it's more than that𑁋it's more to which that Tori somehow understands her without trying to fight back. The girl seems to understand her more than Beck, and somehow her comfort really... eased her heart way more than it should. And the more she thinks about their past interactions, she never realised, even in the slightest, the small boost of happiness in her system.
The only thing she slightly disliked was her rare encounters with Tori's father. However, Jade could tell the man deeply cared for his daughter and Jade only felt even more disappointed in herself for not having a father who treated her the same. Every single tiny thing that Jade did wrong her father would criticise her to the max. And surely that's a reason why she can never come clean to him in the first place.
Because he changed her.
Letting her thoughts die out, Jade grabs a pair of keys from her back pocket, slowly approaching the front door before inserting the key into the keyhole, briefly looking around her surroundings a bit cautiously before entering in and shutting it quietly behind her. She cringes deeply to even the slightest sound coming from her, clenching her fists tightly to ease her worries.
The house is found to be entirely quiet and very dark, almost completely pitch black. The only source of light is from the pouring moonlight through the shades of the windows, but it didn't seem to help at all. Jade let out a tiny sigh of relief, sensing and hoping that her father is probably asleep upstairs. She knew that if he wasn't awake then she wouldn't exactly see the end of it.
And that wouldn't be good.
Jade swears she could have been able to count the individual dust particles floating around her and throughout the house. An unusual smell fills her nose as she walks closer towards the living room, attempting to quiet her steps the more she got close. Her anxiety was through the roof at this point, and the pounding of heart could possible shatter through her own skin. If it was possible to take her heart out to hear the beating, it would possibly [exaggeratingly] deafen her.
Her eyes scan the room as she could see dozens of empty booze bottles on the floor of the living room, some of them slightly or even half-filled, to which it might been drank later. She was usually the one to clean up after her father's daily dose of alcohol, and her father had never noticed that of course. He never noticed that good deeds she would do around the house, never bothering to compliment her on her work or anything. He just blatantly assumes all the work she would be putting in to something would immediately fail, blaming her in the process and leading to far worse arguments and consequences. Jade bites her lip to the thought, trying to dismiss it out of her head. She hated thinking about that stuff, but what would she do if her father is right?
Jade carefully trails towards the staircase, picking a single foot hours after another to walk up each step of the stairs, the floors quietly creaking behind her. She had just hoped that she could fall through the floor and just kill her. Every time it would creak, she couldn't help but wince in frustration as to hope the noise wouldn't wake up her father. Her father wasn't a heavy sleeper𑁋especially in his drunk state𑁋so even the tiniest noise can possibly wake him up, and that paranoid the fuck out of her a lot, scared to the point where even her breathing can wake up him. Luckily (somewhat), her bedroom was right across from the top of stairs, so she was able to sneak inside without making so much noise. Her father's bedroom was across the house, opposite of where Jade's was.
Once she arrives at the top of the stairs, she scurries straight a few more steps until she arrives in front of her bedroom, nearly slamming into the door in the process. She takes a few moments to steady her breathing, placing a hand to her chest area and feeling the expeditious pounding of her own heart. All of her limbs were shaking at different paces, goosebumps dancing up her arms even though it felt warm inside of the house. She takes a couple of deep quiet breaths, the urge to just break down in front of her down growing wildly inside, so she needed to be inside of her room firstly.
Opening the door slowly, careful not to create a squeak, Jade slips through the minuscule crack of her door, closing it tremulously behind her. And as she steps her entire body into the room, a long moment of silence hit her𑁋literally, as she tried not to breathe to be able to hear any noises across the door, trying to scan for any signs of footsteps or anything. Tears were sprawling out of her eyes at that point as the anxiety came to its peak like the top of a rollercoaster.
She reaches over to turn on a simple light on her desk, gazing around her room to find that sense of peace inside of her. Her room is dark, walls all painted a space black, but the wall where her bed was located was painted a light grey.
Jade throws her bag on the chair of her bedroom, flipping onto her bed and releasing a long sigh that she felt she had been holding in for years. She covers her face with her hands, running them through her dark and dyed strands. Her mind only kept wandering to the events that happened at Tori's house, hoping that it would help ease the anxious tension inside of her.
She danced with Tori.
The first time Jade had ever held onto the brunette's waist, and there was not one moment that she did not regret as she let the sound of music guide them through Tori's living room. The first time she ever felt Tori's soft skin in her hands, her tiny waist and beautiful features that Jade had silently adored for a long time. The girl is just so unusually unique towards Jade that explaining it in words was so incredibly challenging, even though Tori doesn't see herself in that way.
And the smile on Tori's face never left Jade's eyes. Her adorable smile that highlighted those known cheekbones of hers. Jade hoped that the brunette knew she was beautiful, because if she thought she didn't, then Jade wouldn't hesitate to tell her straight to her face.
It was that moment that Jade wanted to last forever, and she had the opportunity to kiss her and just let those feelings pour out of her.
But her dad got in the way.
Of course, Jade didn't mind the sight of seeing Tori with her dad. In fact, she truly felt bad for the man upon seeing him. He looked like he was going through some tough shit at work, and possibly trying to deal with the absence of his own wife. And seeing Tori without her dad or her mom, wherever she was, made Jade worry more about her, and Trina didn't seem like much of a helping hand as well. Actually, Trina seemed to be out more frequently as well.
Jade just frowns.
Feeling alone is scary.
Jade changes out of her clothes, grabbing a pair of black pyjama pants from her drawer quietly. She fishes out a variety of unappealing shirts from her drawer, unsure which one she should wear. After a few moments, she just gives up.
However at the corner of her eye, she spots a familiar piece of clothing sticking out from under her bed. Walking towards the bed, she bends down and stood on her knees, reaching over to grab the piece of clothing. She lays it on the bed, trying to allow her head and eyes to familiarise with the clothing, however, after a couple of moments, her eyes widen in a bit of shock.
It's a sweater; more specifically, it'sTori's sweater.
Jade fiddles with the soft sleeves, realising that she must have forgotten to give it back to the brunette the weekend she slept over at her house, and she can only recall constantly telling herself she would give it back to her soon. That didn't seem to exactly happen though.
She picks the sweater up and held it to her nose; it still smelled like her. She fixes it on her own body before climbing within the crevices of her sheets, pulling the hoodie over her head and covering the blanket over her entire body so that all the sounds around her would be muted. The beating of her heart seems to have finally slowed a significant amount as the comfort of the sheets washed over her.
Jade tries to close her eyes to sleep, but to her, it was challenging to fully fall asleep. She tries to force them close but that didn't seem to work, yet it felt as if hours had gone by just in that short amount of time. She could feel that her brain was exhausted yet her mind was not.
Groaning, she emerges from beneath the sheets, leaning over to grab her pearphone on her bedside table.
The time read 10:30 p.m.
Would Tori be up at this time? Jade thought before scrolling through her contacts and landing on Tori's name, tapping on her name and staring down at the send a message option, a keyboard popping open. Probably.
Jade
Tori, are you still up?
Read at 10:30 p.m.
She turns off her phone and quickly buries herself in her sheets as if to hide the embarrassment and sudden shyness in her face, half-expecting a reply from Tori.
But the moment she set her phone back down on the table, it lit up like a beacon onto the ceiling and vibrated loudly. Jade flinches from the sound, heart momentarily racing as her eyes widen, quickly leaning over to grab the phone to look at the notification.
Tori
Hey. Yeah, I'm still up. Are you alright?
Jade vaguely smiles, excitedly texting the girl back.
Jade
I'm doing fine.
Read at 10:31 p.m.
It didn't take long for the brunette to text her back.
Tori
I had fun earlier.
Jade's eyes widens even more to the response, the four words somehow sending sudden shivers up and down her spine. Her heart races... Tori actually had fun with her?
Jade
I had fun too. I didn't know you could dance.
Read at 10:33 p.m.
Tori
Hey! I'm a good dancer!
Jade
I know you are, Tori. I had fun earlier as well.
Read at 10:34 p.m.
Tori
You said you wanted to hangout sometime, right? Where do you want to plan to go?
Jade had nearly forgotten that she wanted to hangout with Tori. She bites at her bottom lip clumsily, trying to think of a place of where to go. But nothing seems to pop up in her own head. And it seemed that Jade became too caught up in her own head that Tori texted her again.
Tori
Maybe we can hangout at your house this time? I don't think I've been inside of your house before. The gang always comes to my house for some reason as if they're directed by some director of a TV show.
Jade releases a silent gasp, cupping a loose hand to her cheek. Tori at her house? No, that can't happen at all. Tori can't step a single centimetre inside of her house or it would be complete chaos between Jade's own conflicts towards her father and... herself.
Jade
No, not at my house. Maybe we can go out to eat, or stay at your house?
Read at 10:37 p.m.
Tori
Why not? We always hang out at my house a lot, even if we don't plan on hanging out. I've never seen your house before as well.
Jade
It just wouldn't be a good idea right now, maybe some other time, okay?
Read at 10:39 p.m.
Tori
Is everything okay?
Jade felt her heart shatter a bit as she could hear the worried tone of Tori's voice through that single text message.
Jade
Everything is fine, Tori. I promise that I'm okay. You just can't come here, it's not the right time.
Read at 10:40 p.m.
Tori
You're getting me worried, Jade. What if you get hurt?
As much as she wanted to tell Tori the situation, she couldn't.
Jade
Tori, I won't get hurt. I promise that everything is okay.
Read at 10:41 p.m.
Tori
I know for a fact that you aren't okay, so please, tell me. You have no idea how worried I feel right now.
Jade please.
Jade
I'll see you tomorrow, Tori.
Read at 10:42 p.m.
Jade turns her phone off, flipping it upside down onto her bedside table, trying to stop herself from going any further with her texting. The vibrations of Tori's text messages continue for a few more minutes but completely stopping as Jade groans loudly in her pillow, burying her face inside the soft material.
It took her a while before she fell asleep.
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Tori awoke to no new messages from Jade, despite seeing her long message history that depicted only mainly from her. She didn't even see any sign that Jade had read the messages at all, and the worry that she felt still did not change at all while she was in slumber. Sighing, she gets up from her bed, heading towards the bathroom where she splashes a handful of water on her face to wake her up. When she got out, she was met with nothing but pure silence.
An awakening.
However, not even a few seconds later, she suddenly hears Trina's screeching from her room, singing her lungs out to "Party in the USA"𑁋what a great way to begin the morning, truly a blessing to wake up to the older Vega's voice. At least Trina was home for once, instead of being out wherever she would head.
Tori just cringes to herself, rolling her eyes while walking down the stairs as Trina's voice slowly began fading away the farther she walked.
"NODDING MY HEAD LIKE, YEAH!!!! MOVIN' MY HIPS LIKE..."
Tori arrives in the living room, taking a quick look around before heading towards the silent kitchen. Even though she had splashed water on her face, it didn't seem to do much when waking her up. Sighing, she walks towards the refrigerator and pours herself a glass of orange juice before completely chugging down the whole entire glass, a slight sting hitting the walls of her throat.
Her dad had probably gone to work by this time, considering the complete silence and the fact that he works 20+ hour shifts nearly every single day. Tori felt bad extremely for her father and the stress he was putting on himself even she knows that it's mainly the job. Last night the man had been in complete stress, as if he didn't have any sleep for the whole entire week. Tori hardly ever sees her father and it's rare when he's that stressed, but it seems like she hasn't been seeing those signs at all due to his frequent disappearances. If only he could just take a break and rest up.
"So I put my hands up, they're playing my song, and the butterflies fly away!" Trina flamboyantly sings her way down the stairs. When she catches a glance at Tori, she takes off her earphones which Tori could still hear the music playing extremely loudly from it. "Morning, Tori!"
"Hey, Trina." Tori greets lowly under her breath, the hint of her annoyance from her singing featuring in as well.
Trina eyes her suspiciously, making her way in the direction of the kitchen. "Are you okay?"
No.
"Yeah, yeah," Tori rubs her forehead𑁋which felt warm to the touch𑁋and closes her eyes momentarily as if making sure she was still sane, releasing a sigh. "Sorry, I'm just tired. I went to bed late last night."
Trina just slowly nods in response, strolling past Tori into the kitchen towards the refrigerator, taking out a carton of milk.
Tori follows her with her eyes closely and wondered where her sister had been last night as for some reason she had expected Trina to walk in at some point during her and Jade's... ordeal and catch them. Turns out she didn't, and she found it rather strange of her absence.
"Speaking of last night, where had you been? I got home from school and you were gone, I just assumed you were at a friend's." Tori suddenly asks out of her thoughts, and Trina seemingly ignored her by pouring some cereal in a bowl and intentionally letting the sound of pouring milk drown out her voice.
Trina puts the milk back in fridge, fishing for a spoon inside of the drawer, stating, "Oh, yeah. I was at a friend's. I was about to head home but then got distracted and had a drink. Don't worry, nothing bad happened. I came home around midnight last night."
Tori's eyes widen abruptly, "Trina! You're not even 21 yet!"
Trina shrugs, "So? I literally just had one drink, I promise."
Tori just groans, making her way out of the kitchen and back up the stairs, shutting the door to her bedroom behind her.
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Tori reluctantly climbs into Trina's car, slipping on the seatbelt and slouching in her seat while staring out the window to void of Trina's curious eyes on her. She hoped that Trina wouldn't make her do anything to her like shaving her armpits and legs𑁋she just wanted to have a peaceful car ride to rid of her constant thoughts of worry about her father, wherever the hell her mother was, and of course, Jade.
Trina, after a few minutes, surprises Tori by making her gasp quietly by shutting the door of the driver's seat loudly. Tori must not have noticed her getting inside of the car earlier due to her lost train of thought. Trina leans back in the seat, taking out her stick of lip gloss inside of her purse while strapping on her seatbelt and fishing inside more to find her car keys.
"You finally decide to ride to school with me." Trina murmurs under her breath quietly while starting the car, turning the knob of the jiggling keys and making the engine come to life.
"It's because everyone I know can't take me at the moment so I had no choice but to ride with you," Tori hisses quietly, crossing her arms together. "And I swear if you make me shave your legs or pits I am getting out of this car at this very moment."
"I already shaved them last night!" Trina exclaims at the younger Vega, pulling out of the driveway and onto the near-empty road. "Plus, that was only one time, Tori. You act like one little event changes your whole perspective on me."
Tori frowns, knowing what she said was true. The main reason is just Trina was plain annoying.
But sometimes she had a heart.
"You're right, I'm sorry." Tori mutters hastily.
Trina briefly glances at the brunette who was staring out the window in distress. "It's fine, Tori," After a few moments, "are you alright?"
"I'm just thinking." Tori shakes her head, gazing out the window as shadows danced across her eyes.
"About?" Trina asked curiously, eyeing the brunette in the corner of her eye.
Tori releases a sigh. Even as much as she didn't want to talk to Trina, or anyone at least at the moment, she had to. Trina was her older sister𑁋she felt like she could tell her anything, even though the girl could be quite annoying most of the time. Tori knew that Trina had a very good understanding nature, especially towards her.
"How do you fall for someone who is just so stuck inside their own head?" Tori asks reluctantly.
It took a few moments before Trina replies, "Are we talking about anyone specific?"
Tori shifts in her seat uncomfortably, pushing the back of the seat down a bit so she could be in a semi supine position with her back comfortably against the seat.
"No," she lies. "I'm just wondering."
"Wellllllllllll," Trina let out dramatically, dragging out the ending of the word. "I would say giving them time to make themselves comfortable around you. Once they are comfortable then they would be spilling their life stories to you in no time."
Tori sits frozen, continuing to think, "But what if you already gave them as much time as you can?"
A couple of moments of silence passes as Tori waited for a reply. "Then just wait." Trina adds while turning into the Hollywood Arts parking lot in not exactly the smoothest turn. Thankfully they didn't live far from the school so they could arrive in around 5-10 minutes, but those 5-10 minutes went by so incredibly quickly.
And it only felt like a single second for Tori.
"Wait?" Tori repeats, somewhat confused. How can she possibly wait for a person like Jade to finally open up to her? She had been worrying about the girl all this time during their unusual relationship, already spotting the hints of Jade's secrets just from her actions and words. The more she waits, the more her worry would grow, and the more different scenarios of Jade getting hurt come to play into her mind.
Trina didn't reply as she was distracted by perfecting her parking, quietly cursing and muttering to herself every time the car wasn't straight or was off the white line. Perfection was Trina's main goal in life.
Both sisters climb out of the car at the same time, grabbing their bags from the backseat and shutting the doors.
"What I mean is," Trina pulls her polka-dot backpack on one shoulder. "Wait. You may never know what may happen next. They might just make a move and you won't expect it."
Tori furrows her eyebrows impatiently, wanting to protest more. "But𑁋"
"Shh, Tori," Trina places a finger on Tori's lips to shut her up as the brunette flinched from Trina's cold finger, eyeing it angrily and making Trina take it away. "I gotta go. I'll see you after school, okay?"
"B𑁋" Tori starts but immediately closes her mouth, thinking about Trina's words deepy. "Okay."
Trina flicks the girl's nose before walking away, swaying her hips from side to side as if she's some participant in a beauty pageant. Tori briefly looks up towards the sky and smiled, clutching onto her backpack tightly before redirecting her gaze towards the school. The weather seemed cooler as she could feel the Christmas season coming.
"Okay."
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why was i lowkey proud of the revamp for this chapter tho, for jade's part lol
and then i got lazy at the end
typical me