Nag-unat ako nang makabangon ako sa kama ko. Naniningkit ang mga mata ko nang silipin ko ang bintana. Tirik na ang araw at halos magtatanghali na rin. Tiningnan ko ang kama ng kasama ko rito sa dorm, maayos na ito at wala na ang bakas nito roon dahil palagi 'yon wala rito at gabi na lamang ito dumarating.
Saktong pagtayo ko ay narinig ko ang mga katok sa pintuan kaya napalingon ako roon. Lumapit ako roon at pinagbuksan ang kumakatok dahil baka supervisor ng dorm iyon. Ngunit pag-bukas ko ng pinto ay mukha ni Dylan ang bumungad sa harapan ko. Nanlaki ang mata ko at hindi makapaniwalang tumitig sa kanya.
"Hi," he greeted me without any facial expression.
"Paano ka nakakapasok dito?" kunot-noong tanong ko. Noong mga nakaraang araw ko pa iniisip 'yun eh. Hindi naman kasi kaagad-agad nakakapasok ang mga outsider dito sa dorm.
"Just simply, I took a one room here," aniya at ngumisi.
"What? Lumipat ka na rin dito?"
"No, I'm just paying for it and so that I can go here anytime I want."
I looked at him like he did a weird thing. "You're unbelievable." He was just wasting his money.
He just shrugged like he didn't care. "So . . ." He stared at my face, which made me confused with my looks at this moment. Oh my gosh, I hadn't washed my face and brushed my teeth! "Can you take a bath now and ready yourself? Let's have a Christmas vacation in hacienda," he said.
"H-ha? Now na?"
"Yeah."
"O-okay," sabi ko at mabilis na tumalikod sa kanya.
Dumiretso ako sa banyo at tiningnan ang hitsura ko sa salamin. Okay naman ang mukha pero parang bruha ako dahil sabog ang buhok ko. Napanguso na lang ako.
***
As the car took the way to the Hacienda Remirez I couldn't help but be excited to see a green surrounding and fresh air again. I wondered how was Lolo Max now.
"I texted Auntie Jessie. Now she's asking me where will I celebrate Christmas," I told Dylan who was driving.
"What's your response?"
"I don't know where."
He took a glance at me. "Don't you want to be with them?"
"I want but . . . I'm just missing my parents," malungkot na saad ko at bumuntong hininga.
"Then what's your plan?"
"Maybe, I'll just stay in the house."
"What?"
"I think that's better than being with someone's family."
"They are your relatives."
"Kahit na."
"Then just be with us."
"What? Mas lalong ayaw ko!"
"Tss! Sa mansion lang naman tayo maglalagi. Kilala ka naman nila."
"No! Nakakahiya," maktol ko. He just heaved a sigh and sneered.
Napakatahimik ng hacienda nang makarating kami roon dahil tanghaling tapat na at siguradong nasa loob ng bahay ang mga residente. Walang nagbago sa lugar.
When we arrived at the mansion, we heard a song playing on the music player placed on the wooden divider of the huge living room. It was an old song entitled Please Don't Ask Me by John Farnham. There we saw Lolo Max sitting on the couch while turning the pages of a photo album.
"Lolo Max," Dylan called him, so he turned his head to us.
He let go of what he was holding and then stood up to approach us. He was very happy to see me that he patted my head as if I was still a kid.
"You're missing Lola Zenaida again," Dylan told him. That explained that the photo album contained pictures of Lolo Max's wife.
"I always miss her," he said, "Kumain na muna kayo. Nakahanda na ang pagkain."
Lots of food were waiting for us in the kitchen. The helps quickly assisted us and poured us some orange juice as we occupied the chairs there.
"Are your parents busy again, Storm?" Lolo Max asked Storm.
"Yeah. Papa is out of country, while Mama wants to wait for him before going here."
"How many days will you stay here, hija?" This time he asked me.
"Before Christmas eve," I replied.
"I told her to spend her Christmas here but she doesn't want to," ani Storm na animo'y nagsusumbong. Pinanlakihan ko siya ng mata.
"You are welcome here, hija."
Pilit na ngumiti ako kay Lolo Max, "Naku! Hindi na po, Lolo, may gagawin din po kasi ako," palusot ko.
"Okay." Lolo Max started to eat.
I glared at Storm secretly. He just smirked before he drank water.
***
I heard some knocks on my room's door, and I knew that it was Dylan. Napagkasunduan kasi namin na maglibot sa lugar at puntahan ang ilang mga tanawin na hindi ko pa nakikita.
"Wait!" I shouted while I was zipping my backpack. I would bring some clothes with me just in case we would swim. I even wore my swimsuit already under my clothes.
I quickly opened the door and there I saw Dylan wore a black printed shirt, denim shorts and leather hiking sandals. He was also carrying a backpack.
"Let's go," he said and then held my hand, dragging me outside the mansion. His hand was so warm.
"Aren't we gonna bring snacks?"
"No need to. We will go home before the night comes." He said and held my hand to help me to ride the horse and then he rode next. He was behind me, which made the atmosphere uncomfortable; I even got goose bumps.
When he held the rope connected to the halter of the horse, I felt his warm body met my back. The horse started to walk and then run in an smooth way unlike my experience with Kirby. I was just silent because I felt awkward with his presence behind me.
Ilang sandali lamang ay nakarating kami sa batis na pinuntahan namin noong gabing namalagi kami sa falls. Napakaganda pala roon at sobrang linis ng tubig. Parang ang sarap maligo roon.
"Can we soak there?" sabi ko kay Dylan kaya bumagal ang takbo ng kabayo at huminto ito sa gilid ng batis.
"Are you sure? Don't you want to the hill first?"
"No, I want to get wet first."
"Alright." He got off the horse and helped me to get off too.
Hinubad ko ang backpack na dala ko at nilapag iyon sa damuhan bago sinimulang tanggalin ang pagkakabutones ng yellow long sleeve polo ko.
"Wala bang ahas dito?" tanong ko kay Dylan na nasa gawing likuran ko. Tinatali nito ang lubid ng kabayo sa puno.
"It's safe here."
Napatango naman ako hinubad ang damit ko. Sinunod ko na rin ang pants ko. My swimwear wasn't that revealing because it was just one-piece and only have X style of strap on the back.
"Hey, Dylan!" I called him while staring at the water. Nang lumusong ako sa tubig, naramdaman ko ang pag-agos ng tubig sa paa ko. Nilingon ko si Dylan na ngayon ay nakatayo lang sa gilid at nakatingin sa akin. "Dylan! Take a picture of me!"
Huminga lamang siya ng malalim bago dinukot ang cellphone niya sa bulsa ng shorts niya at tinutok iyon kalaunan sa akin kaya nagpose ako at ngumiti sa camera.
"One more!" I said and changed my pose. I saw him wear a poker face and I knew that meant he was already annoyed, but he didn't say anything. He just took a picture of me without saying anything . "Thanks!" I told him before walking down into the water. It was just shallow; just below the knee. The flow of the water felt so relaxing on the skin. It was cold but not too much. I noticed that there were some fishes there that were going with the flow of the water. I turned my head to Dylan and saw him sitting on the grass. "Hey, Dylan! Don't you want to go here?"
"I feel cold," he replied.
My brows furrowed and thought, Cold? Tama lang naman ang temperatura ng lugar ah, I thought.
Umahon ako sa tubig at naglakad palapit sa kanya. Seryoso ang mukha niya habang nakatitig siya sa akin at kalaunan ay gumuhit ang pagtataka sa expression ng mukha niya. Lumuhod ako sa damuhan at hinaplos ang noo niya. I gasped when I found out that his temperature was hot.
"You are sick, Dylan!" gulat na sabi ko at nag-aalalang hinawakan ang magkabilang pisngi niya gamit ang dalawang kamay ko. Napatigil ako nang hawakan niya ang mga iyon para pigilan ako.
"Just enjoy yourself there. I'll be fine here," he said; then, he stood up and shoved my hands. Napaangat ako ng tingin sa kanya at tumayo na rin.
Napabuntong-hininga ako. "Hindi na. You need to get rest, Dylan. Pwede mo naman akong ilibot sa lugar bukas." Probably, he was very tired.
"Demi," he objected.
I didn't mind him. I picked up my clothes and wore them again. Mabuti nalang parte lang ng binti ko ang nabasa sa tubig. "Let's go home now." We needed to go home as soon as possible.
"I said I'm fine," he said with brows met.
"No! You need to get rest," medyo naiinis na rin na sabi ko dahil nag-aalala ako sa kalagayan niya.
Hindi siya umaalis sa kinatatayuan niya kaya ako na ang lumapit sa kanya at hinawakan ang kamay niya para hilain papunta sa kabayo. Ako na rin mismo kumalas ng lubid sa puno.
"Help me to ride," I told him. Mataas kasi masyado ang kabayo kaya hindi ko kayang sumakay ng mag-isa.
He just stared at me and said, "I'm okay."
Tumingin ako sa kanya nang hindi makapaniwala. "Anong okay ka diyan? You're not okay, Dylan. Look . . ." kinuha ko ang kamay niya at dinama ang init niya. "You have a fever."
Napaismid siya pero nagulat ako nang higitin niya ang kamay ko sa pamamagitan ng kamay niya na hawak-hawak ko. "Why do you care, Demi?" he said while our face were so close to each other. He was looking directly into my eyes. "If you can't love me back, I'm begging you, please, don't make me fall for you over and over." Napalunok ako dahil sa sinabi niyang iyon lalo na't nakakalunod ang mga tingin niya.
"Who told you that I can't love you back, Dylan?" I told him. His eyes shifted to my lips as I spoke and then shifted back to my eyes again. He didn't react but I knew that he was confused. "You're the one who's being subjective now," I said.
"What do you mean?"
"You graduated as valedictorian, Dylan. Prove it now."
He stared at me for a few seconds before he let go of my hand and his hand shifted to my face, caressing my cheek, and the only last thing I new was he was already kissing me gently. I held his shoulders to balance myself. I just closed my eyes and kissed him back, though it was my first time to kiss someone on the lips. I didn't know how I made it. I just wanted to show Dylan that he was wrong. If I have loved him as my best friend, I can also love him more than that.
When our lips detached, our eyes met while hearing every single breath of us.
I saw how Dylan lips form a smirk while he was staring at me. "Kadiri pala, huh," pang-aasar niya.
I blushed with shame. I pushed him away from me and looked away. Gosh, it was embarrassing!
"L-let's just go home," sabi ko nang hindi tumitingin sa kanya.
"No, we're not going home," he said. That was why I looked at him with brows furrowed. "Unless you tell me the reason why you kissed me back." Nawala ang pagkakakunot ng noo ko dahil sa sinabi niyang 'yon.
Ramdam ko ang mabilis na pagtibok ng puso ko habang nakatitig ako sa kanya. Nawala ang buhay sa mga mata niya nang mapansin niyang wala akong balak na magsalita. Parang napipi kasi ako at feeling ko panaginip lang ang lahat ng nangyayari.
"Alright. Let's just go home," he said with no emotion. I wasn't sure if he was mad.
He held my hand and helped me to ride the horse. Walang kibong nagpaubaya lang ako sa kanya. Habang tinatahak namin ang daan pabalik ng mansion, unti-unting namuo ang pagnanasa sa puso ko na sabihin sa kanya ang totoong nararamdaman ko sa kanya. I knew that he didn't like my silence and I thought I'd hurt him. That was why he chose to decide to go home, instead.
Hanggang sa makapasok kami sa mansion ay walang nagkikibuan sa amin. Pumunta ako sa direksyon kung nasaan ang room na ginagamit ko habang siya naman ay sa kwarto niya. Nahawakan ko na ang doorknob ng pintuan nang humito ako saglit at nilingon ang direksyon kung nasaan si Dylan. Nabukas na niya ang pintuan ng kwarto niya at nakapasok na siya sa loob kaya bago pa man niya maisara ang pintuan, pinigilan ko siya.
"Wait!"
Napatigil siya sa pagsara ng pintuan kaya halos kalahati na lamang ng mukha niya ang nakikita ko nang balingan niya ako ng tingin, tila hinihintay niya kung ano ang sasabihin ko.
I heaved a sigh before I said, "I love you, too . . . more than a best friend."
Hindi ko na hinintay ang reaksyon niya dahil mabilis na pumasok ako sa loob ng kwarto ko at dumapa sa kama habang dinig na dinig ko ang malakas at mabilis na pagtibok ng puso ko.