'Hey, man,' Charlie greeted, as I entered the shop on a very frosty Monday morning. He eyed me nervously and I immediately relaxed upon seeing that Tori wasn't in yet.
'Morning,' I said, clearing my throat as I hung up my coat. 'How was Friday?'
'Not bad,' Charlie replied. 'You didn't miss much.'
'Great,' I said, sitting down at the desk to take a look at my templates for today's clients.
'Tori is running a little late,' he told me.
'She can not turn in at all for all I care,' I mumbled.
'Yeah, about that,' Charlie sighed. 'She's really torn up. I mean like...she was literally sobbing on Friday when you didn't come in.'
'Do you know why?' I asked him.
'Yeah, she told me,' he answered.
'Well then,' I said. 'Do you blame me for losing it?'
'I guess not,' he replied. 'However, I believe her when she says she didn't mean it that way.'
'You're kidding, right?' I said, turning in my chair and frowning at him.
'Dude, she wouldn't do that,' he said. 'Not in that way, not when she knows everything that's happening. All she has done is be there for you.'
'I'm not going to get into this,' I sighed, turning back around. 'Honestly, I don't give a shit about it anyway.'
'I just don't want a shitty atmosphere amongst us all,' he said. 'We're good friends and we work together.'
'Friends don't kiss friends when they've just got out of a relationship and are feeling like shit about it,' I told him.
'Fair one,' he sighed. 'At least hear her out when she gets here.'
'She can say whatever she wants,' I replied. 'Doesn't mean I'll be the same with her as I was before.'
'Oh, dude, shes here,' he said, quickly, moving back across the room to his station as if we'd been up to no good.
'Good morning,' Tori said, her voice sounding weak from the doorway behind me. I kept my back turned and didn't reply.
'Hey,' Charlie replied.
There was silence, only disturbed by the sound of them both moving around and setting up. It went on for a while and I kept my back turned as I organised my work, ignoring the awkward tension. Charlie was right to not want an atmosphere in here, it was a shitty feeling. I had to remind myself that I was the owner of this shop and I didn't want the place I worked to feel this way. I had to remind myself too, that I was Tori's boss and it wasn't professional to be giving her the cold shoulder over a personal matter.
Turning around in my chair, I saw Charlie setting up his station as Tori glanced through some mail and they both looked up at me, waiting for something to be said.
'Nothing is to be mentioned about last week,' I said, looking between both of them. 'We forget about it, we move on, we work as normal. Business comes first and we need to be getting along, okay?'
'Yes...definitely,' Tori said, nodding slowly as she eyed me. Her facial expression told me that she was feeling uncomfortable and embarrassed so I tried my best not to make eye contact.
'It can't just be completely ignored,' Charlie said. 'Business may come first but friendship is just as important.'
'Matter of opinion,' I said with a shrug, getting to my feet and heading to my station. 'First client is here.'
Tori quickly turned to the doorway as she spoke. 'Okay, I'll go and-.'
'No, Charlie can go,' I interjected, making her pause as Charlie frowned. 'Please.'
He glanced at Tori, who kept her eyes down and ignored him and he looked back at me, shaking his head slowly before pacing quickly out front.
'Tori,' I said, letting out a gentle sigh. 'I know I just said not to mention anything, but I don't want you coming to work feeling uncomfortable.'
'I don't want that for you either,' she said, her voice already sounding emotional. 'I promise you, Cal, that's just how I behave with my close close friends and I've begun to see you as exactly that so it was just an automatic response.'
'I don't care,' I replied. 'I'm not cool with that.'
'I need you to believe me,' she said.
'I don't know what to believe,' I said. 'So from now on, just pretend it never happened, okay?'
'But we won't be the same,' she said. 'Not close like we were.'
'Just because I confided in you about a few personal things doesn't mean we were close friends,' I told her. 'We were friends. I'm not close to anyone right now.'
'We "were" friends?' she asked.
'We're colleagues, okay,' I told her. 'Keep it that way.'
The sound of Charlie coming through with Tori's first client ended our conversation and she quickly nodded before turning to greet the girl. I headed out front and waited at the main desk for my first client to turn up and kept my mind distracted by going through some emails, not wanting to even let the other things I had going on cross my mind for a single second.
My first client arrived and I got right to work, the concentration I was holding keeping my mind focused and free from wandering thoughts. The three of us worked silently, only talking to our clients and each other only when necessary. I knew Charlie was mad at me and Tori felt awkward but it was better for me that they didn't try and converse with me. I was in no mood for friendly chat.
When I got a free hour for lunch, I left the shop and headed down the street to the bar where I had a bottle of bud before crossing the street to Subway, eating in the restaurant and heading back. I heard them both chatting in the back as I entered, moving through to the archway where they both went quiet and moved away from each other as I entered, pretending to be busy.
'So I'm that kind of boss now, huh?' I asked and they both looked up quickly.
'What do you mean?' Charlie asked with a frown.
'The kind where my employees scurry away whenever I enter the room, pretending to be busy as if they were the whole time,' I said.
'We have been busy,' Charlie said, scowling as he turned away.
'Okay, Charlie, you can end your bitch fit now,' I told him. 'You're mad, I get it.'
'I'm not mad, bro,' he said with a shrug.
'Sure you're not,' I said, pulling an uncaring face. 'Anyway, you guys don't need to act all nervous.'
'We aren't,' Charlie said, slowly, through slightly gritted teeth.
'Look, why don't we just focus on making a plan for tonight,' Tori said, quickly trying to change the topic.
'What's tonight?' I asked with a confused frown.
'You forgot?' she asked me.
'Clearly,' I replied.
'It's that art event at Columbia tonight,' she said. 'We're going there to do a workshop on body ink, remember?'
'Oh no,' I said, suddenly remembering.
'You agreed to it months ago when I mentioned it,' she said.
'Yeah, I obviously wasn't really listening,' I said, suddenly getting a sweat on.
'Shocker,' Charlie scoffed, quietly.
'Charlie, pipe the fuck down,' I told him. 'If you don't like the way I've handled things going on in here then why don't you just hit the fucking road.'
'Don't push me,' Charlie replied, keeping his voice steady and his composure calm.
'Guys, please don't do this,' Tori sighed. 'Stop arguing, okay. I'm going to go write up some good topics for us to discuss with the students tonight. You two just stop talking to each other.'
She headed out to the front desk and Charlie and I returned to our stations, not talking to one another. My next client finally arrived and I continued on as I had, chatting with the young guy named Louis, and ignoring Charlie and his glares.
I did briefly remember agreeing to do this workshop tonight but that was back when things were fine at home and business was just starting. I'd only really agreed because it was being held at Bethan's campus and it was something I'd planned to ask her to come with me to. I really did not want to have to go to the Columbia campus tonight but it would be unprofessional not to.
At the end of the day, I grabbed my things and headed to the door with Tori reminding me of the place I needed to be. I drove home and got showered and dressed, trying to look a little smarter than usual considering we were going to an Ivy League school.
As soon as I was dressed, I headed out to my car and drove to campus, parking up on Amsterdam Avenue, feeling all too uncomfortable with being back here. I shook off the feeling and made my way into campus, looking for the building I needed to be in. It was already a little dark out and I knew that main classes for the day would be over. I wasn't worried about seeing Bethan here, I knew she'd be home by now. I just hated the idea of being in this place; her college. It was a part of her life and I felt like I was intruding.
After Friday night's drunken phone call, I knew she still had feelings for me. She was out with friends and she called me. She was asking me pointless questions about what I was doing just to talk to me. She got mad the second the topic came up of us breaking up. It was easy to remain calm when she was the frantic one and her little tantrum at the end of the call just confirmed everything for me. I figured she'd likely went straight home after that and I was a little surprised that she didn't turn up at the apartment.
Even so, I still wanted to give her her space. I didn't want to bother her anymore than I already had and I had to just let things lie until she decided what she really wanted. I would accept it either way, but I hoped she would come back to me. I couldn't be the one to try and get her back, she had already showed a negative response to the times I had tried. She had to come to me.
As I walked right across the grass, following the brief direction Tori has given me for the building, I cut down the side of the library building, the lights getting a little dimmer. As I turned the corner, I suddenly halted and slid backwards quickly, avoiding a clash with a hurrying student.
'Shit, sorry! she hissed, picking up the jacket she had dropped.
'Penny?' I questioned, squinting through the darkness.
'Cal?' she asked, moving her hair away from her face and studying me. 'What are you doing here? Why are you dressed all smart?'
'I'm doing an art workshop,' I told her. 'Why are you here so late?'
'Oh, I was just doing extra work at the library,' she said. 'Anyway, I have to go.'
'Sure, get home safe,' I told her. 'See you.'
'Yeah, bye,' she said, awkwardly, before dashing off quickly.
'Clearly someone doesn't like me very much anymore,' I mumbled to myself, heading down the path to the building that I could see was lit up and busy with people inside. I bit my lip and groaned as I headed inside to do this shitty workshop and spotted Charlie and Tori behind a desk, chatting with some students.
As I approached, Tori was in the middle of discussing single needling and I hovered by the table, leaving her to do her thing. Charlie spotted and approached me, his face saying that he was clearly still feeling annoyed.
'Care to smile?' he asked me.
'No thanks,' I said, keeping my eyes on Tori and the students so I didn't have to look at him.
'You're being a fucking ass, you know that?' he muttered.
'Think what you want,' I said. 'I don't give a shit.'
'She works so hard for your business to help make it successful,' he said. 'She's just an employee. The only way she benefits is from the money she makes from her clients but she does all of this promotion shit to help you. You come here and stand aside with a face like a whooped ass and continue your fucking childish mood with her.'
'Dude, I already talked to her today and we resolved things, okay?' I said, finally turning to him. 'Chill the fuck out.'
'You need to apologise to her,' he said.
I ignored him, suddenly aware that what he had said was right. She did work hard, a lot harder than I did. She had done so much to help me get my business even further forward and I did appreciate it.
'I don't have anything to be sorry for,' I told him. 'But I'll accept her apology and agree to be friends again. That's all she wants.'
'Good enough I suppose,' Charlie said. 'I was expecting less from you to be honest.'
'Here's a thought,' I said, feeling vexed by his attitude and wanting to shut him up. 'How about instead of directing your anger at me, you direct it at her instead? The one who is actually to blame.'
'Why the fuck would I be angry at her?' he asked, turning fully to me and frowning.
'Because she kissed me,' I told him. 'Not the other way around.'
'What are you insinuating?' he asked.
'Well, you're mad that we kissed right?' I said, a smirk starting on my face as his grew more confused. 'Because you wish it was you she'd done it to because you're so fucking desperate to get in her damn panties.'
'Shut your damn mouth,' he hissed. 'Don't make me lose my shit in front of these kids. She's like a sister to me you stupid fucker!'
'So angry,' I said with a breath of laughter. 'So, like I said, go be mad at her, not me. She is the one who went after me and I'm sorry that you're so fucking jealous that she hasn't given you the time of day, but it ain't my problem so quit fucking making it mine.'
'Are you crazy?' he asked me. 'She's one of my best fucking friends and she's completely happy with whoever she's seeing now. I don't see her that way you fucking idiot and you know I don't.'
'Why are you reacting this way then?' I asked.
'Because you're a fucking prick to her all of the time,' he said. 'God forbid any of us say the slightest thing wrong about your precious fucking Bethan, we're all in for it. Bethan gave to Tori as good as she got from her and you were just blinded by her. You never saw Tori's side of it.'
'You're fucking delusional,' I said, now feeling pissed off that he'd brought her into it. 'It's like you're actually trying to make me kick your fucking ass before firing it.'
'Oh...no. Nooo, no,' he said, slowly, smirking at me casually. 'That's nothing. If I really wanted to make you mad enough to that extent, I'd just fuck your girl. It would be easy, right? She went behind your back with one of her best friends and she gave her number to a guy in the club right in front of you. I'm sure she wouldn't hesitate to let me-.'
Smack!
He didn't finish his sentence. He had smashed through a large display of artwork and was lying on the floor before he could get there. Everyone seemed to scream and go silent, all running to see what happened. I glared down at him struggling on the floor as Tori ran over and gasped.
'What the fuck, Cal?!' she screamed. 'Are you crazy?'
A few professors rushed over, trying to figure out what had happened, one of them subtly pulling out his phone, obviously to call security.
'Get up on your feet!' I demanded as Charlie collected himself and sat up.
'Cal, don't!' Tori cried.
'On your fucking feet!' I yelled.
Charlie stared at me, blood pouring from his nose as he slowly stood to his feet, taking a few steps closer to me.
'You two need to leave, right now!' a woman with glasses yelled.
'Shut the hell up,' I muttered, not taking my eyes off Charlie.
'Is that all you got?' Charlie asked.
'Go ahead, try it again,' I dared him. 'Go ahead and say one more fucking thing about her. I dare you. See what I do to you.'
Charlie shuffled nonchalantly on the spot, eyeing me up and down clearly weighing up where he should head with this.
'I'm done talking to you,' he said, shaking his head.
'That's what I thought,' I replied, turning and quickly moving across the room to the door. I had to disappear before security came and recognised me again; this time they might call the police.
I rushed down the steps and back along the rear of the buildings, around the corner and up the lane to the main campus grounds. I took wide strides across the grass to get to my car quickly, noticing a little figure exit a building and head towards the gates. She was only a few feet in front of me, but I recognised her right away now we were under the bright campus lights.
'Penny!' I called, speeding up as she turned. She looked frozen in fear as she spotted me and I caught up with her, noticing her avoiding my eyes. 'Are you okay?'
'Yeah,' she replied, still looking at the ground.
'Penny, what's wrong?' I asked.
'Nothing, Cal, nothing,' she said, looking up at me with a smile. 'I just have to go.'
'I thought you were heading home ages ago,' I said. 'Why are you still here?'
'Ugh, long story,' she chuckled. 'I left my notes in class and umm...I went back for them and the classroom was locked so I had to find the janitor, yeah, and he took forever to find the key. It's all a big boring story.'
More like a big load of bullshit. She was nervous as hell around me and I knew she was holding back on something.
'Sure,' I said, nodding. 'Let me take you home.'
'No, it's okay,' she said.
'I'm not inviting myself into your dorm room,' I said. 'I just don't want you walking in the dark. I'll drop you at your residence.'
'Okay,' she said, nodding and giving me a smile.
We both headed across campus and onto the street to my car, neither of us talking until I'd pulled away. I wanted to bring up the phone call Bethan had made and check that she was alright after it.
'You don't have to go into detail,' I said. 'I just want to ask you something.'
'Sure,' she said.
'Is Bethan okay?' I asked.
'Yeah, why wouldn't she be?' she asked.
'She called me on Friday night,' I said. 'She was drunk.'
'Yeah, we were out,' she replied. 'I didn't know she had called you.'
'Yeah,' I said. 'She was okay at first. We were just talking about normal stuff and she was laughing. Then she brought up one of our biggest problems we'd had and got really mad and hung up on me.'
'Well, I told her it was a bad thing to drunk dial her ex,' she said, turning to look out the window.
I frowned to myself, glancing over to her and debating whether to respond in the way I wanted to. She was acting strange.
Fuck it.
'I thought you just said she didn't tell you she'd called me,' I said, and she slowly turned around, clearly thinking of what to say.
'Well, yeah actually, she did mention it in the club,' she said with a sigh. 'Sorry.'
'What's going on, Penny?' I asked.
'Nothing,' she replied.
'Well, it's a little weird to be lying to me about that,' I said.
'I just didn't want to talk about it,' she sighed. 'I don't want to get involved.'
'Yeah, okay,' I replied with a nod. 'I don't want to talk about it either. I just want to make sure she's okay.'
'Yes, she is okay,' she said.
'Okay then,' I mumbled, eventually pulling into the street of the dorm buildings.
'Thank you,' she said, reaching for the door without looking at me.
'Wait,' I said, stopping her and she hesitantly turned to look at me. 'Is there something I should know?'
'Cal,' she sighed.
'I had to ask,' I quickly interjected. 'Are you sure everything is okay?'
'Please, you guys aren't together anymore,' she said. 'Let her live her life. She's fine and I'm doing my best to help her be happy.'
I began to nod slowly, believing her words that she was helping Bethan through it.
'Goodnight,' she said.
'Yeah,' I replied, keeping my eyes ahead until she left the car. I turned and watched her walk into her building, knowing Bethan was likely inside lounging on her bed, probably watching those two fucking vampire brothers fight over that girl again. She could be sitting with her laptop in front of her as she got on with an assignment. Maybe she had her head stuck in To Kill a Mockingbird for the millionth time; her favourite book. My favourite too.
She'd convinced me to read it telling me that I would relate and I read it, understanding why she believed that I could and also realising why she loved the book so much. It was probably the only novel I'd read fully, so it wasn't hard for it to become my favourite, but it was more because of Bethan's love for it and how she'd wanted to share that with me.
I drove away once Penny was safely inside, heading back to Inwood and parking up at my building. Back inside to the empty apartment I went, a place that was no longer home and just a space I lived in. It had only felt like home when she was there. Now it didn't even feel warm or secure or welcoming to me. I wanted nothing more than to pack up my shit and drive back to The Falls to my cabin; leave her to live her life as Penny had said and go back to my old one, the one where I didn't feel like this every single day.
The only thing holding me back besides her was my business and even with that, I had thought about handing it over to Charlie or Tori. Although I wasn't getting on with either of them right now, I knew they'd run it the right way and I wouldn't have to feel like I was being held back from leaving the city and returning home.
It was something I'd been thinking about for a while. Once I'd started to realise things weren't getting better with Bethan, I'd began making a mental back-up plan in my head for leaving. Now that Penny had just enlightened me with some eye-opening words, I was more than ready to put that plan into action. It was time to really start thinking about life on my own and living it here in New York City was not the life for me.
I pulled out my phone, not overthinking what I was about to do and brought it to my ear, waiting to hear her voice pick up on the other end.
'Hello,' she answered, sounding very curious as to why I was calling.
'Hey, Tori,' I said, taking a breath. 'Listen, I know I just punched Charlie in the face and probably pissed you both off even more but I really need to talk to you about something important...it's about the shop.'