when can i ever tell you
that i didn't mean to let you leave
that i didn't want to give you up
that i didn't want to make you look at me
like i did not cry to you during late hours of the night
like i did not show you scars of my past
like i did not let you admire me at my best
when can i ever tell you
how much you still mean to me
shouts filled with anger reach my deaf ears
but encouragements and laughter are all i chose to hear
it's okay
i tell myself
someday he'll know and realize
it's okay
i tell myself
one day I'll be able to look at you
and
with that look
i'll let you know and realize
I'm still here.