Hey there,
Can't begin to tell how sorry I am for this late and clumsy (yes not a chapter I am proud of :/) update. I didn't find time to write or when I had I was trying but it didn't turn out as good as I wanted it to be.
I really enjoy writing this story but I have to come up with something in order to keep it interesting, and now my energy is just so drained. But enough of the excuses I swear I'll gather myself!
I hope it's still better than nothing xD
I think next up we are going to say good bye to Jared and then there is also a flashback in the agenda ^^
"Are we going straight to the jet?" asked Lynn amazed as she looked out of the window of the car.
The gate just opened up to let us into the runway area where the small jet was ready, door open, stairs fitted.
"Aha," Shannon smiled as he and Jared was sitting, facing us, looking out of the windows too.
"How? And the security check?" she asked stunned.
"It's my jet," started Jared. "Privately owned like a car or a boat. No need for that."
Lynn needed a second to be able to pull her eyes away from the jet just to stare at Jared with open mouth.
"You own an airplane? Holy shit."
The guys smiled as Jared continued.
"Yeah, it can come handy from time to time."
"No, shit," grinned Lynn. "So, you just call up your pilot to pull the plane from the garage and let's roll to Malibu?"
"Well... they need a couple days of notice in advance so they can get the plane ready to fly but pretty much yeah." he grinned as we stopped.
There were two security guards who opened the doors for us.
"Mr. Leto," one nodded as we all got out of the car. "The rest of the party has arrived and boarded the jet.
"Thank you," Jared acknowledged as he waited for all of us. "Up, up, up, we won't make it to the big Apple in time," he shushed us up the stairs.
Walking in front of me, Lynn turned her head back.
"I really would like a picture with the jet," she whined.
"Ask Jared," I offered.
"Could you ask?" she whispered as we got in.
"Let's see. Maybe in New York; now we are in a hurry," I answered and when we stepped in, the 5 others were already sitting around, talking.
"Oh, look who decided to show up! The Leto brothers!" Alex spoke up with fake surprise.
"Don't even," I heard Shannon from behind us as we moved in. "We were already late and these two have decided to take a shower together," he pointed to me and Jared with a bitch face and Jared sighed stepping next to me.
"So, you think we should tell them we're together?" he asked sarcastically, and I just pressed my lips to suppress a giggle, while Jared went to welcome everyone with his warm hugs.
Surprisingly enough, or not so much; depends on who's point of view I look at the situation from, the brothers' friends were not so stunned about the fact that Jared and I got together, more like surprised that we eventually did.
As always, both of us just let it slide and after some smiles and reassuring, we decided to change the topic by introducing Lynn to the group who shook hands with everyone then we all settled for take-off.
On the way we opened two bottles of champagne and cheered for the New Year ahead and whilst Jared and Shannon were having their reunion with their close friends, me and Lynn chatted away the hours then she asked me to snap some photos of her, her champagne and the interior of the jet.
She was more than excited, and I couldn't help but laugh on her.
"Ask, ask, ask," Lynn nudged my arm as we all stood up, ready to leave the jet.
"Jared, Lynn would like to ask something."
"Go ahead," Jared peeked back, stopping, what made everyone else force-stop behind him.
Lynn pinched my arm, rolling her eyes and I just grinned back at her as she turned to Jared.
"I was thinking if... I could take a picture with the jet and... maybe post it," she asked uncertain.
There weren't people before who made Lynn become shy or quiet; Jared was the first one. I didn't know if it was because for her he was THE famous rockstar or because of his strong presence or personality, but I definitely liked to see the humble side of her. If it was any other person's jet, Lynn would be already hanging on the wing taking bikini pictures for snapchat.
"Sure, you can," nodded Jared, "but only if we all can fit! Let's make a group picture on the stairs," he offered, and I saw Lynn's eyes brighten.
"Okay, girls, as you are the only female on board, you go to front," Jared reached his hand out to help me walk down past him on the stairs then helped Lynn as well who stopped next to me.
The driver who waited for us, took Lynn's phone to snap some pictures.
"Okay, everyone smiles, and say happy new year!" shouted Jared as the driver snapped a picture and I felt Jared's arms wrap around my neck from behind, hugging me to his chest.
I was laughing on Lynn who was blowing a kiss to the camera.
After a couple snap the driver nodded and Lynn skipped down the stairs excited to take the phone.
I was trying to move, but Jared held me tight pressing a kiss onto my cheek, keeping his lips there he purred;
"Welcome to New York, love."
I smiled leaning more to him and when he pulled back, I stole a quick kiss.
"Hey, love birds! You might be warm over there, but we are freezing, let's move!" Shannon sounded rather annoyed behind us.
"Sorry," I whined trying to move once more but Jared still held me tight as he spoke up.
"Shannon, would you quit whining?" he sighed.
"The fuck, Jared, six of us are standing here in shirts!"
"You knew we are coming to the cold," Jared's voice now as cold as the winter temperature, responding to his brother then leaned to my ear. "Let's go, just slow, be careful, "he grinned evilly as he led me down the stairs.
Stepping down I went next to Lynn to check the pictures as well, but I saw Jared stopping at the end of the last stair checking his reflection in his phone, adjusting his growing hair.
I knew so well he is out to annoy Shannon, who's patience ran out quick and forcefully shoved Jared down the stair who stumbled, and almost lost balance.
"Are you out of your mind?" Jared yelped looking back at Shannon who just rumbled towards the car.
"Let's just go and start drinking, shall we?" chuckled Dan, the brothers' oldest friend as they all climbed into the car.
"Don't start a fight now, please," I asked Jared as he walked towards the car fired up.
"What the fuck is his problem now?" he continued motioning towards the car, but I just took his hand, stepping in front of him.
"Hey, hey... let it go, okay? We are here to have fun. I'm sure all will be fine once we arrived and settled. Your best friends are here," I tried to calm him, grabbing his both hands.
He finally looked at me and took a deep breath before nodding.
Sending him a smile I walked with him towards the mini bus and once we were all in, the driver pulled the door close on the side and settling in he started to drive us out of the airport.
"Hey, Lynn, tag me in your post, I'll repost it," Jared leaned forwards to look at Lynn who sat next to me in the same row.
She just looked up to him stunned.
"Really?" she gasped.
"Yeah," he grinned.
"Show me which one," I asked pulling the phone to me. "Jay, you can't! You are like, hugging me here," I stated uncertain showing the phone to him.
"And? Come on, Av, it's just a photo with an innocent hug! And we look adorable," he grinned giving the phone back to Lynn.
"I don't know," I pressed my lips anxious.
"Babe, it will be fine! Even if it comes through as a hint, it is still better to start going public this way."
"Yeah, I don't know what's with you, Avery, I would just straight go make out with him on stage, if I were you!" grinned Lynn.
"Oh, I know that!" I laughed.
"Of course, you have a 4-story apartment," mumbled Lynn looking up to the tall building as we got out of the car.
"You expected less?" Jared grinned opening the front door.
"I quickly learned when I expect something big from you, it turns out to be even bigger," she stated amazed.
"Avery probably can share your opinion on that one," his knowing smirk at me made me blush instantly and stepping inside I pinched him on the arm, he hissed looking at me with narrowed eyes
"Uh..." Lynn pulled a face. "I pretend I didn't hear this," she raised her hand walking past us as Jared laughed amused.
After showing Lynn and some of his friends around the house everyone went of to some of the bathrooms or spare rooms to get ready while Shannon decided to already prepare some drinks.
I was sitting on the bed of Jared's room, watching him picking out his outfit for the night from his backpack carefully, still deciding between two shirts holding each of them in front of his torso, checking himself out in the full length mirror attached to the wardrobe door.
"Okay, Av, navy blue or yellow? What are you going to wear?" he asked looking back at me from the mirror.
I just shrugged leaning back onto my hands.
"Would you be... okay If I wouldn't go to Time Square?" I asked with pulled in neck, knowing already he is not going to accept it.
"Absolutely would not be okay!" he turned towards me with wide eyes. "Whatever is with you and New Year's, I am going to change that because I love a New Year and now you are going to be by my side," explained firm.
"It's... it's different, I don't feel like partying at all..." I tried once more, looking up to him pleadingly.
"What do you usually do on New Year's then?" he asked ready to listen.
I shrugged.
"Nothing..."
"Is there a reason?" he hung the shirts up in the wardrobe then turned back towards me.
I looked up to him biting my lips.
I knew he didn't know anything about it, I never mentioned it to him, but I also knew he has to know. Although I have never talked about this to anyone before and I tried to keep it that way.
"Eleven years ago, my father was... in a couple of weeks he got very sick... he had headaches... nausea, throwing up. Turned out he had a cyst in his brain. They removed it with surgery. But it... it got back nine years ago. This time it was growing fast. It had cancer cells. It was way too big they couldn't possible do the surgery anymore. He went through therapies but ended up in the hospital just before Christmas. I was... I went to see him every day; we spent Christmas in the hospital... On New Year's Eve... in the morning I went to see him again. He asked me to stay with him for the night. But... my friends; they found some cool abandoned castle and they planned a huge party there," I shook my head pressing my lips as Jared sat down next to me squeezing my hand on my thigh. "I told him I would be back the next day and he said..." I gulped, "he said he might not have next day. All I did was wave and say that's silly. I went to the party. I... "I took a deep breath holding back my tears as I looked in front of myself. "I got wasted. I don't remember much... My friend... She told me in the morning when I woke up what happened," a sob left my lips as I squeezed Jared's hand more.
I have never told this story out loud before and it was hurting me.
"Shortly after midnight I got a call... my friends said I freaked out and cried and told them I want to go home because my Dad died," I cried. "The one who... who wasn't that drunk she called my Mom, but she wasn't... in a place to drive so my Mom's parents... they had to come and get me... I puked all over in their car I... I don't remember anything," I cried, my lips trembling. "That's why they hate me, that's why I hate me, that's why I hate New Year's... I left him and I... I was stressed and stupid and... I... let down everyone... every single one in my family... especially my father who was my best friend," my head lowered as my shoulders were shaking into the sob.
"Oh, Avery," pulling me close, Jared hugged me tight to his chest, feeling him rubbing my back. "It's... terrible, but don't be silly; yes, it was an unfortunate incident, but you can't blame yourself."
"Jared, stop trying to make me feel better about this!" I stated angry. "You weren't there, you don't know, and you can't possibly make me feel any better about this, just... don't say... anything, you wanted to know it, I told you. Now don't try the comforting," I hissed pulling away from him taking some deep breaths.
After a long minute of silence Jared got up and knelt in front of me taking my hands.
Looking down at him his eyes were shining sadly, rubbing the back of my hands with his thumbs.
"I respect your wishes, but I still would like you to come with me to welcome the New year," he started softly. "We don't have to make a big deal out of it. I am terribly sorry for what happened to your family. And I respect your decision of not talking about it, but..." he shifted closer on his knees, "now me and you... this is going to be the start of a New Year which we are going to spend together. I'm not saying you have to forget about your father I just would like you to give some room for maybe a bit more pleasant New Year's Eve memory as well."
His gaze never leaving mine as he drove a hand up to caress away my tears.
"Please," he whispered.
I never forgot to be thankful for this man. That he chose me, and I knew he deserves everything and more. There is no way I can say no to those eyes.
I nodded breathing deep and he nodded too.
He gently pulled me down from the bed to kneel in front of him. He kissed me gently, caressing the back of my head down through my neck and spine, stopping his palm on the small of my back.
"I love you so much..." he mumbled to my lips. "I'll do everything to make this night as easy and as amazing for you as I possibly can. I know it's hard and I don't expect you to be all smiles and crazy. I don't wanna see fake happiness okay? If you feel like crying, let it out," he whispered pulling my head onto his shoulder.
"Okay," a shaking sigh left my lips as I hugged him back, breathing in his scent, burying my face into his neck. "I love you too," I whispered.
"Let's get quickly ready and have a drink," he smiled pulling away a bit, caressing my hair behind my ear.
10...9...8...7...
The crowd counted back until midnight.
Time Square was packed and our group was right in the middle of it. Jared was wearing a black jacket with a furry hoodie, covering almost all his face. He held me tight to himself by my waist, our heads so close, the rim of his hoodie touch my forehead as we counted back, looking at each other.
I whispered the numbers as this was the first time in almost a decade that I acknowledged New Year's Eve. It almost felt foreign.
My thoughts were jumping to my father to Jared, trying to fight back the dark thoughts, only focusing on the here and now. Jared's warmth, shiny eyes and beaming smile.
It's a new beginning with him.
Although I had my insecurities and doubts in myself, I couldn't help myself but smile as warmness filled my heart holding him so close, and for some reason, deep down I felt like this could last forever.
"Two... one... Happy New Year!" I heard people shout as the music got louder, trumpets were blown, but all I was listening to was Jared's soft voice wishing happy new year, then his lips pressing onto mine.
Hugging me around tight I closed my eyes letting the feeling consume me until Lynn didn't drag me away.
"Avery I am so happy you are here!! This place is amazing!!" she screamed excited hugging me around.
"It is... pretty amazing," I smiled looking around as the others hugged each other with joy.