•Cody's POV•
''Are you sure you'll be alright here until Damien gets back? I can stay if you want me to,'' Javier offers.
''No, no go catch your plane. And Skylar will be here, I'll be fine, trust me.'' I tell Javier, barely believing the depth of my own words.
I won't be fine, when am I ever fine? There's so much shit going on in my head I doubt the voices will shut up long enough for me to catch my breath.
But Javier doesn't need to know all of that.
Javier needs to get on his plane and go deal with his business.
All he needs to know is that I'm fine.
Or at least that I'm damn good at pretending to be.
''Okay, but you'll call me if you aren't right?'' He asks, more like begs of me.
I look over at him, locking my gaze with his. And something deep inside me knows that he can tell I'm lying to him. But I also know he won't push as far as to call me out on it. He feels like I've been through a lot today.
But I feel like I've been through a lot my whole life.
Today was just another walk in the park compared to other days.
''Yeah, now go,'' I tell him. I take my seat belt off, opening the car door. Skylar climbs out of the back seat of the car, but before I get out I lean back over and pull Javier into a hug. ''Thank you,'' I say, because he damn sure deserves to hear it.
''Anything for you, you know that,'' He says, hugging me back. ''I love you, I'll call you when I land.'' He says, releasing me from the hug.
''Love you too,'' I say, climbing out of the car and shutting the door.
I follow Skylar into the penthouse.
''I can sense the question bouncing around in that big head of yours, so let's skip the part where you ask it. Okay?'' I say to him once we're in the living room.
He looks at me and shrugs.
I sigh.
Well I know where this conversation is headed. To hell and back very quickly.
''Look why ask it if you know it's only going to piss me off? Why purposely try to get under my skin? Trust me Skylar, today's not the day.'' I warn him.
''I feel like you need someone to get under your skin. There's a lot of shit you're holding in right now. I can see it. You're on edge and I know you can feel it. You hold everything in thinking it's going to make you feel better. Those emotions aren't just going to vanish Cody. Accept that.'' He tells me.
I roll my eyes.
''I just came from an involuntary therapy session, I don't need you to give me shit too. And besides if you wanted me to take you seriously whatsoever you shouldn't have shoved your tongue down my throat. My respect for you died then.'' I inform him.
Yeah, I'm a dick.
I know.
It's one of my special qualities.
''You're going to stop fucking talking to me like that. I don't give a fuck if I pounced on you, you kissed me back and you liked it. So stop trying to paint me out as this villain who stole some virtue that you don't even have. You're not a damn saint Cody.'' He spits back at me.
I know what he's doing. And he does it so fucking well. Just picking any type of fight he can with me so that I can get this frustration that I hold inside me out.
But this is the wrong fight to pick.
He's going to hurt his own feelings.
Because I just don't like him like that.
Who cares if I liked the kiss?
Who cares if I liked any of the shit we did after the kiss?
I know what I want.
I want Scarlet.
And if Skylar stops getting in the fucking way maybe I can actually get her back.
''I don't care,'' I reply. I walk towards the stairs. My body tenses as I feel his hand grip my arm. He pulls me to a stop, turning me around to face him. ''Don't touch me right now,''
''So you don't care if my sister never speaks to me again?'' He asks me.
''You don't care if I'm never happy again without her in my life.'' I remark.
''You've been dating her for a fucking year Cody, you'll get over it. She's my sister dude.'' He stresses.
''Where was all of this twin concern when you went deep sea diving in my mouth? What do you want me to tell your sister? That I came onto you? That's not tr—''
''Don't fucking lie. I watch you watching me. Don't act like you've never gotten off to the thought of me. Or am I just imagining the way your eyes are glued to my body each and every time we're in the pool? Do you need me to keep going? Do you need me to remind you of all the shit that's all of sudden slipped your mind.'' He states.
And I want to call him a liar. But him and I both know the truth.
That is the truth.
But whether I got off to the thought of him or not, whether I did or didn't check him out a couple times is besides the point. I didn't kiss him. He kissed me.
And I'm not going to lie, I did feel something. It felt amazing, just not as amazing as having Scarlet in my life though.
He doesn't make me feel how she does.
I don't know, she just has a softer approach to everything and he's just so...so like me.
And if I can barely deal with myself why the hell would I want to take a chance and deal with him?
I'm not going to lie and say we aren't going through a rough patch right now, but when he's not drop dead in love with me, Skylar's the perfect best friend.
If only he could act like it right now.
''This conversation is getting old Skylar,'' I tell him.
''I'm starting to think you need me to spell it out for you,'' He says, folding his arms across his chest.
''Look, just tell your sister that you came on to me, that shouldn't be so hard to do if you care about me as much as you claim you do,'' I taunt, attempting to head up the stairs only to have him pull me back again.
His grip is firm on my shoulder and I have to take deep breaths to keep from flashing out on him. He knows that I don't like to be touched when I'm mad. He's seen firsthand what happens.
I shrug his arm off of me, turning around to face him but taking a step back.
''What?'' I inquire boredly.
''You want me to tell her I sucked you off too? Or is that old too?'' Skylar looks down at the watch on his wrist, ''Thirteen hours ago old to be exact.''
''Look,'' I say to him seriously, ''I'm not trying to be a dick—''
''Oh, it comes naturally,'' He says, budding in. I ignore him.
''I'm just not that into you. Okay?'' I explain to him.
''I disagree. But whenever you get over this fear of all the men in your life hurting you, let me know.'' He tells me.
I take a hard breath of air.
I hate that he knows me so well. And I hate that I can't do anything more than deny the truth that he's speaking.
But so fucking what if that's how I feel?
My father beat me for sport.
My brother did the best he could but he did end up leaving me with that abusive asshole.
And I don't blame him for that. I'd never blame Damien for that. I know it's not his fault.
But it did happen.
And Javier...well Javier hasn't fucked up yet but I'm not holding my breath.
Because every time I hold my breath someone ends up letting me suffocate.
I decide not to reply, and turn to make my way up the stairs again.
Skylar grabs my elbow, and I feel this pain in my soul when I can't stop myself from feeling attacked. And on reflex I turn around, my vision clouding with tears as I shove him hard.
I hear his body collide with something, and he screams as glass shatters on the floor.
I fall to my knees, cradling myself in a ball as I try to calm myself down.
But my mind isn't having it and I can't seem to convince myself that I'm not back in my old house, fighting off a grown man who's only goal in life is to beat the hell out of me.
I'm shaking and I can't stop.
I will myself to breathe.
Take deep and long breaths.
''I'm sorry,'' I manage, once I get my breathing under control. Once I calm myself down and contain my crazy.
Cause I sure as hell am crazy. And I don't know how to fix myself. I don't know how to not let myself slip back into dire fear in moments like these.
Defending myself from a monster that's no longer under my bed. But that monster left his mark on me. I'm never going to be free of the wounds he inflicted on me.
''I'm sorry Skylar,'' I say again. I look up and see him sitting on the floor, staring at me, eyes flooded with concern and interest.
Never with fear and judgement. No matter which side of me he see's, no matter which mood I'm in.
He'd never look at me like that.
Because he knows I hate it.
''So,'' He says, groaning as he climbs to his feet. He walks over to where I'm at and takes a seat on the floor next to me. His hand comes up to my face and he wipes away the tears that stain my cheek. ''How're you feeling?'' He asks me the one question I hate.
''Fuck you,'' I say laughing.
''You can,'' He replies. ''Whenever you admit to yourself that you're just that into me.''
He stands up, offering his hand out to me. I take it, pulling myself to my feet.
''But since I don't think you'll let yourself accept that for a while, I'll help you out with my sister. I'll tell her I came onto you. I won't tell her how you've led me on since we've met or about anything that we've done after the kiss. Since this is what you think you want, I'll give you a fighting chance. But I'm not just gonna sit and wait for you while you play perfection with her.'' He tells me.
''What do you mean?'' I ask him.
''You know what I mean,'' Skylar declares. ''You're just too stubborn to acknowledge it.''
And I am.
''C'mon, let's clean up before your brother gets back.'' He says.
<<A/N>>
It's official, I'm on a roll.
Is this two updates in one day? That's crazy, I don't think I've ever done that before.
I figured you guys were a little curious as to why Cody and Skylar were sweeping up glass. And also this is for everyone who wanted a Cody chapter!
It was fun to try a different point of view...more Cody chapters anyone?
What do you all think of Cody now that you've gotten a peak inside his head?
What about Skylar and Cody's relationship?
Please leave a comment and tell me what you think of the story!
Please Vote!
Posted: September 27, 2019.