Lillian was biting down on her nails as she walked to the park to go meet Ryan and Jeanette there. They both decided they needed somewhere privet and their houses were not an option and since the park is mostly empty in the winter, seemed like the best place.
And since the park was only two blocks away, she wanted to walk to think about things.
She isn't sure how she felt about Jeanette cheating on Ryan. It should give her comfort knowing that Jeanette isn't the innocent one either, but she felt something was weird. Maybe it because Lillian was still the one carrying the product of the affair she had with Ryan. She sighed, hating how she's always feels guilty and can never grow a backbone.
But Jeanette cheated on Ryan also! Sure, she isn't pregnant but she did wrong to!
When she got to the park, she sat down on a bench and waited for them to arrive. After last night before her night was turned around to Jeanette confession and it felt like the good old time, she felt like she didn't know Jeanette anymore. Hell, she didn't. She's changed and Lillian guessed she has also, but very little.
But all she knows is now she can kiss her friendship goodbye.
Exciting news is that in two weeks she gets to find out the sex out of the baby. She was nervous, not sure if she wants to know cause she kind of feels like she wants it to be a surprise but knowing her well not able to be able to this known and not knowing herself is mind racking, so she'll have to know.
She felt a flutter, but this time, it just a bit stronger. She moved her hand under her jacket and her hand touched her stomach, hoping the baby move again. Always when she felt the baby move it always told her that she actually was carrying something in her.
She heard a car driving up behind her and she turned around to see Ryan car driving up but when he was a few feet away from her the passenger door opened and an angry looking Jeanette got out and walked towards her.
"Jean, stop it!" Ryan yelled.
"You think you can have him?", Jeanette screeched and Lillian was confused as she got up from the bench and walked around it.
"Jean, what are you--ahh!", Lillian cried when Jeanette smacked her pretty hard.
"Jeanette!", Ryan called out in concern.
"You little slut!", Jeanette yelled and Lillian felt her hands push her and she slipped on a small patch of ice and fell down on her side. "I thought you were my friend, Lil! How could you?"
Lillian sat there, looking at the ground with her hand at her cheek. Well I guess he told her already, she thought and it pissed her off! They were suppose to tell her together! Ugh, Ryan!
"Jeanette, stop it!", Ryan said and she heard Jeanette struggle. Lillian looked up at her and Ryan had his arms around her to hold her back.
"Ugh! Let go of me, Ryan! How could you want her? She's nothing! I can't believe I wanted to be friends with you after I finally had a life! You were just holding me back, Lillian! We stopped being friends a long time ago actually!".
Lillian felt her eyes water up but she held back her tears as she got up from the floor. "Jean please, I didn't mean for this to happen!"
"Liar! I have seen the way you looked at me and Ryan before, jealousy in your eyes!", she screeched, trying hard to get out of Ryan arms.
"I'm being honest with you! It's not like I wanted to be pregnant at sixteen and the father being my best friend boyfriend as the father. I never wanted to hurt you and-"
"What?", Jeanette asked, stopping her struggling and looked confused. "What are you talking about?".
Lillian looked at her confused now and looked at Ryan who looked at exhausted.
"This wasn't what she was mad about.", he asked.
"Wh-what then?", she asked.
"Your pregnant?!?", she yelled so loudly the whole town might have heard you. "Oh my God, Lil, your dirty little slut!".
Lillian hand came up to her month, feeling sick. She can't believe she just said that to her! What she was she so angry about then? She's so confused. Tears ran down her face and she was ready to apologize her heart out.
"Oh don't give me those fake tears!", Jeanette said. "Britney was dropping hints to me but I just thought she was crazy and just looking for us to hate each other but she was right! Your such a slut Lillian, I hate you! How could you get pregnant by my boyfriend!".
Lillian was trying to say something but she couldn't get the words out of her mouth. Her throat felt closed and tight even when she opened her mouth.
"Jean, stop it!" Ryan yelled.
"Don't even start with me, Ryan! You lying cheating bastard! It's over!" she said, turning around in his arm and pushed him away. "God, how long have you both been going behind my back?"
"Jean, please-", Lillian said when she could finally.
She turned around quickly, "Don't even speak to me. Your face isn't pregnant, Lil, so don't test me!"
More tears ran down her face, "I never meant for this to happen. I would never wanted to hurt you-"
"To late.", she said. "I hate you Lillian, I hate you.", she said, sniffling and her eyes began to water up before she started crying to. "I hate you. How could you do this to me? I thought you were my best friend but I guess I was wrong.", she said, walking away from them both before turning around and ran away.
Lillian felt like her heart was broken and she couldn't stop crying. Her emotions were off the rocket and all she wanted to do was feel numb. There it was, her worse fears came true.
Ryan stepped up to her and pulled her into his chest. She cried right there, not having the strength to leave. She just wanted someone to hold her right now. Ryan arms were around her and he pressed his head next to her as he whispered, "It's going to be okay"
~
"What was she mad about in the first place?", Lillian asked Ryan. They were in his car in the park parking lot in back seat. She didn't want to go home right now, not with just what happened. Lillian had just manage to stop herself from crying and she didn't want to go home and her parents see her face red from crying.
He sighed tiredly, "On the way here, she started asking why we were going to the park and I didn't answer her, just ignoring her. She kept going off and off until she finally ask me if there was somebody else. I didn't say anything else and she got really mad, hitting me until I said yes. She demanded me to tell her who and I was really pissed cause she made me almost get into an accident. So I told her you and I think you know where it left off to."
Lillian blushed up and lowered in the seat a little. Does that mean he's her boyfriend now? That just made her blush up more. She never thought she would never have a boyfriend...at least not in high school. And she never thought she would 'steal' someone else boyfriend.
Lillian remember something she forgot throw the whole thing that Jeanette cheating never came up. Ryan should know that cause Jeanette isn't innocent either. "I need to tell you something, Ryan.".
She looked down at her confused, "What?".
"When I was over at Jean house last night, she kind of...well, she told me something.", she said, picking herself up so she could sit right in her seat.
"Annnnd?" he asked, telling her to go on.
"Well, she the only one who hasn't been honest today.", she said. "She told me last night back in November she slept with Asher Shield."
Ryan arm slipped from around her shoulders and he leaned furrowed, "What? She did what with that asshole? And she had nerve to call me a cheating bastard?"
Lillian didn't know what she could say. She just sat there, letting him steam off. His face was tight with anger and he was breathing heavily. After a few moment, he sat back down and grumbled under his voice.
"I can't believe she was so angry at us when she did the same thing." he said, glaring at the back of his seat.
Lillian didn't know what to do or say, so she sat there awkwardly.
He ran his hand down his face and sighed, looking tired again, "Today has been such a crazy day."
"Yeah, I know.", Lillian said.
"So it looks like you wont be the only one going to have an awkward day at school Monday.", he said, placing his hand over hers. "Three more months we only have to deal with."
"Then what about next year?", she asked.
He shrugged, "We wont care and I'm sure something more shocking well happen by then."
She wrapped her arm around his arm and leaned her head down on his shoulder.
A few moments he turned his head to look at her and he turned to face her, "Lillian, please keep the baby. I don't think I could live my life without knowing who and where my child is."
She couldn't look up at his eyes, so she looked away, "I don't know, Ryan, it's so hard being a teen parent. What happens when it's not like how you imagine and you get tired of-"
"I wont, have more faith in me.", he said. "I was going to tell you when I was going to take you out to eat tomorrow but I have a job interview at a restaurant. It isn't much, I'll just be the host but next year when I turn eighteen I could become a server or find a better job.".
"It isn't just about the money, Ryan. I don't think I can wake up three times a night because of the crying?", she asked. "And your social life is going to be dead and what about soccer?".
"I'll find a way to hang out with my friends sometimes and knowing my mom, she'll want to have it all the time since she loves babies. And soccer well, I can give it up.", he said.
"But Ryan, you love soccer.", she said.
"I know, but I want to be there for you both more.", he said. "Soccer is just a hobbie, something I can do easily in my backyard. It wasn't like I was going to go big for it. I'll be the cop like I said I would.".
"What about me, then?", she asked. "I want to go to college after high school.".
"By then he'll be almost be two and we can find a babysitter. You'll go to college and we'll be fine.", he said. "I know it's not going to be some fancy job but when he get older, you can study it all then. You can still become a doctor or lawyer one day, Lillian. It's not like your giving up your dream, just putting it on hold for a few years.".
"Easier said then done."
"I know but it's not like we're the only one ever in the world that can make it through.", he said. "And maybe we take turns having him or her each night.".
"I don't want that though.", she said. "And that mean buying two cribs and bunch of other stuff and I know my parents enough to know they wont let you stay at our house.", she said, depressed now cause even if they did keep it, how would they be a family then if they live in different house?
"Then you'll come over to mine.", he said. "We'll talk to your parents and they'll have to understand you'll need the father help. My room is big enough for you and the baby.".
"Like I said before, easier said then done.".
"We at least have to try and talk to them.", he said. "What if they say yes?".
"My eyes would pop out of my head from shock.", she said, chuckling and he joined. "But can we tell them later? I've dealt with so much surprises in for a while?".
"Deal, but we will before the time comes.", he said. "And is that a yes?".
Lillian hesitated, wonder if he's right. Many other teen mom had finished high school some way or another. Even if it's in a public school or Cyber schooled, she can do it. And she has baby sited many times before. She isn't comparing them both really since they're both completely different, but she feels it in her heart she can and she wants to keep it.
She smiled, "Yes, we're keeping it. It's official now.".
"And we're official now.", he said cheesingly before cupping his face and kissed her.