Chapter 25 (Not proofread, as usual, so please ignore any mistakes, I will correct them in my final edit. Thanks!)
‘The court room was quiet when Finn got to his feet and was escorted to the stand, his face hidden by the shadows of his hair. The shadows under his eyes. The shadows in the contours of his face. He was a walking nightmare, something that even children would be scared of. My heart was probably the only one thumping. It was the first time I’d seen him since I told Mum what he’d done to me. I’d seen pictures but seeing him in person, seeing his moving chest with his breaths, his easy going walk made me want to run away, apologise for being so stupid and hide away in my bedroom again.
I didn’t listen as he swore to the truth, put his hand on the bible and recited the words that I’d only ever heard on the TV. What if they believed him? Fell for his pretty, innocent face like everyone else did. What if I had to go back to it and nobody could ever help me?
“Not guilty,” Finn pleaded without a second of hesitation, meeting my eyes with a coldness that stopped my heart in its erratic state.
Jenna’s father was standing in front of my brother, grilling him with a certainness that I knew would be aimed at me when his lawyer had a go.
“It wasn’t rape,” he insisted. “She wanted it, she loves me. She’s just scared about what we have,” Finn said, not once admitting that he hurt me, that the bruises and forced entry were pretend and my pretend story.
“Did you, or did you not force yourself upon Miss Kathryn Price without permission?” Jenna’s dad asked again, his voice getting impatient.
“She wanted it, she asked for it. She even said please,” Finn announced, curling his thin lips into a coy smile. I shuddered, fiddling with my shaking fingers.
When it was my turn to stand up in front of everyone, I almost cracked. My legs were seconds away from giving way underneath me and every step closer to the front of the crowd felt like a mile.
“Twice,” I answered to the lawyer’s question.
“No, I didn’t want it. I’m not lying to you.” I was lying. I lied about how many times it happened. I lied about my feelings and I lied about Steven. The words were sour, yelling at me to take them back, tell the truth and put an end to it. Finn’s smug smile shut me up, staring me in the face from across the court room with a certain arrogance. He knew he wasn’t going away for as long as he should do and he knew that I would never crack. Even when he went to prison I’d end up being his puppet. It was the only thing we both silently knew.
“I had a good life, there was no need for me to cry out for attention. Especially not like this. The medical reports prove that there was a forced entry, I am not lying to you.” My final answer was accompanied by a single tear, wiping away the lies as I took my place next to my mother again.
Court went by in slots. Some moments were rushed and barely remembered, others were so excruciatingly slow that I could only wish to forget them. There was one thing I could remember, though. A small victory, a little bit of freedom.
“Mr Finn Price, you have been found guilty of first degree rape on two occasions. As a result, you shall spend fifteen years in Truro custody centre.”
Eli huffed, slumping down on the floor next to me with a sour look on his face. I chuckled, raising both of my eyebrows. He looked at me out of the corner of his eye and exaggerated a huff again, clearly trying to get my attention. I took the bait after he did the gesture once more, reminding me of Carter.
“Alright, I’ll bite. What’s the matter?” I asked. He angled his body towards me, nodding at Tempest.
“The little devil gave my mum a petting session and now won’t even let me put my foot in the stirrup!” he exclaimed. I let out a bark of laughter, shaking my head in amusement.
“They say that horses can sense things, maybe she sensed something about your mum?” I offered. Eli’s broad shoulders slumped again, one of his arms tentatively coming around my shoulder to pull me to him. I went relaxed, used to the way he was around me and listened to his calm, beating heart.
“Maybe. I think she did it just to spite me,” he confessed, rubbing the nape of his neck. Chuckling, I stretched my legs out in front of me, enjoying the feeling of my muscles stretching as the ground groaned beneath us.
“That sounds more like it. You’re bugging her, she likes to be left alone,” I mocked, moving away from his arm, which he let drop onto the floor.
“Ouch, turning my own horse against me? I didn’t know that you could be this bitter,” he sniffed, pushing himself to his feet with a grunt.
“You’re one insult away from losing your wedding ticket,” I taunted, also getting up. He gave me one look and smirked, turning on his heels towards his horse.
“Wouldn’t want to go to a wedding with someone like you, anyway,” he muttered, feigning offended as we walked back over to Tempest’s field.
“You’re a real self esteem builder, aren’t you?” I asked sweetly. He looked back at me, doing a poor job of stifling his laughter.
“You’re my girlfriend, aren’t you meant to be nice to me and big up my ego?”
“You give what you get, Eli, you give what you get,” I said, greeting Harley with a pat on the muzzle. Eli chuckled under his breath, glancing over at Tempest. She snorted, flicking her mane around before running off towards the other end of the field. Eli looked after her, annoyance and disappointment on his face as he hopped up onto the fence.
“Mum likes you, by the way,” he said and then paused. “Thanks for what you did, not everybody would,” he finished, looking me in the eyes, his own showing his sincerity.
“That’s a relief and you don’t have to thank me, it was nothing,” I dismissed, shooting him a smile as I held my horse still, rubbing down his neck.
“I do have to thank you, I know she can be a...” he seemed to be struggling for words. “Handful,” he winced with the word and I sighed, resting my hands on his knees from his position on the fence. My gesture didn’t seem to take him by surprise, his eyes remained the same level of calm they always were.
“Shush, it was fine, she is an amazing woman and you’re far too grateful for your own good. We had a pretty good afternoon, okay?” He looked like he was about to respond with something I didn’t want to hear before he shut his mouth and gently took hold of one of my hands that were resting on his knee.
“Okay,” he whispered. I smiled, giving his hand a squeeze.
“Good. Mum’ll be home soon, she said that you can stay for dinner if you like,” I offered with a small smile. He nodded, rubbing his hands on his jeans before smiling.
“I’d like that, actually. Dean’s at home so he should be able to sort something out for my mum,” he decided, jumping down from the fence to take hold of my hand.
“I need to go and sort out the veg, are you coming?” He answered with a nod, gently putting his arm over my shoulder, still holding my hand, to keep me tight to his body. Almost like a shield.
While Eli was kicking off his shoes and washing up, I went to grab the vegetables from the basket out the back, flicking off any stray earth. Mum preferred growing her own vegetables without all the additives, they were better for us and the horses if she did it like that.
“Have you got any more letters?” Eli asked, holding the door open for me. I walked through, clutching onto the carrots and turnip before dropping them on the side. I shook my head, giving my hands and the vegetables a rinse under the tap.
“Nope, I haven’t heard anything from him,” I said, drying my hands on a tea towel. Eli grabbed a knife out of the top drawer and handed it to me, handle first. I took it and left it by the sink, all ready for when Mum got home.
“Maybe he can’t get his letters to Steven?” he offered. I shrugged, hoisting myself onto the table.
“No idea. I’m just waiting for the next one to appear in Harley’s stall, though.” Rolling his lip into his mouth, Eli gently skimmed his warm hands up my arms, leaving a trail of goose bumps behind them. I closed my eyes, putting a wall up between me and my raging pulse, letting out a deep breath. His fingers moved along the faint scar on my collar bone that stained my skin and along to my necklace. I opened my eyes, peering up at him.
His eyes were expressionless as he turned the clover around and read the engraved message on the back.
“Why do you wear this?” he asked, his voice carefully calm. I shrugged, moving back a little bit so that I could see him.
“I’ll answer it if I get a question,” I said and a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
“Go for it.”
“He gave it to me before everything turned sour. I was nine and he used his own pocket money to do it,” I paused, looking down at the lucky clover. “He told me it would stop me falling off Harley and to this day, I’ve never fallen off. It’s kind of like a failsafe. It also reminds me of what he was like before...” I trailed off, Eli nodding along to let me know he got the point.
“What do you want to know?” Eli asked, doing his usual of not saying anything about my answer.
“If you’re okay. You’ve been off recently,” I said, moving my hand up to brush his hair out of his face. He closed his eyes, leaning into my touch before letting out a deep breath.
“Mum’s been a bit testy. Spencer’s dad has stayed over the past couple of nights but she’s not coping well without my uncle,” he whispered. I listened to him as he spoke, gently wrapping my arms around his neck. His lips tickled my hair against my neck when he whispered, letting me in for a few minutes before Mum came bursting through the door.
“Sorry to interrupt, kids, but I’m absolutely starving and I take it that you pair want some Chinese?” Mum asked, holding up two white plastic bags, filled to the rim with small boxes and a delicious smell. I grinned and nodded, Eli’s expression matching my own.
“If you’re bringing Chinese every time, interrupt whenever you like,” I mumbled, helping my mum get some plates and forks out.
We ate in silence, only speaking when I had finished the last of my chicken. Eli had to undo his top button and Mum was already loosening the strings on her trousers.
“That was good, thank you,” Eli said. My mum dismissed his comment with a warm smile and the wave of her hand.
“You’re welcome. You can come over for some food whenever you like. It’s just not always quite that nice,” Mum replied, gesturing towards her empty plate. “How long ago was it we had this last?” Mum pondered, placing her plate on the side behind her with a sigh. I shrugged.
“Don’t know. I think it was Finn’s birthday,” I said, passing her my own and Eli’s. She scrunched her face up, clearly thinking.
“Probably was, actually. Just think, for the next fifteen years the £25 for his birthday dinner is all mine,” she teased, causing me to smile. We’d only just started talking about him again, not tiptoeing around the subject. If he ever came up, it was awkward so talking about him made it that little bit easier. Eli wasn’t finding it so amusing, in fact, he was frowning.
“Fifteen years, is that all?” he asked. I felt my skin going pale and all the blood rushing to my heart. Mum frowned, chucking the tea towel on the counter.
“That’s the maximum they could give him. Don’t get me wrong, I wish he was away a bit longer, but first degree rape is a ten year sentence. Two occasions took it up a bit,” she explained. Eli shot me a look and I stared at him, silently begging him that he kept his mouth shut. He knew everything that Mum didn’t. He knew about Steven, the last seven years and the letters. Eli gave me one last pleading look before turning to my mum again.
“Did you say two occasions?” he asked. Mum nodded, raising an eyebrow at me.
“Yeah, I thought Kat would’ve told you,” she said. I shrugged, offering a smile as if this conversation was completely normal and I wasn’t panicking inside.
“If you don’t mind me saying, I don’t think Kat has told you everything,” Eli said after a few moments of silence. I widened my eyes, glaring at him. Mum’s brows furrowed and she turned to me.
“Kathyrn?” Mum asked, her voice and expression curious.
“I don’t know what he’s talking about, maybe he heard me wrong,” I said, giving Eli another stare. He shook his head and mouthed the word ‘sorry.’ Before I could stop him, it was too late.
“Finn’s been doing what he was doing since Kat was ten. She told me and there’s letters to prove it in Harley’s stable.” Mum looked at me with a mixture of pure shock and sympathy. I couldn’t even face her, I just stared into Eli’s guilty face with disappointment leaking from my pores. My life was about to be turned upside down and spun around all over again.