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{𝘭𝘺𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘴}
{𝘭𝘺𝘳𝘪𝘤 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨}
"𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘺, 𝘴𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘦."
"𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥."
"𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐'𝘮 𝘶𝘱 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩."
"𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩
𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧𝘪𝘴𝘩
𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘪𝘵."
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(𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐)𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚖𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚎, 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚞𝚛𝚎. 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚖𝚎𝚛 - 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚗𝚘𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜- 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚊𝚗 𝙸𝙼𝙰𝙶𝙸𝙽𝙴, 𝚕𝚘𝚕. *𝚜𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚛* 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚍, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚢 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚗𝚍.
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I placed my book which was 'Emma' by Jane Austen beside me with a small smile as I heard the front door close downstairs, alerting me that my husband of two years, Zach, is home. "Hey, babe." Zach smiled, walking into the bedroom. He had been off for a couple of weeks now though. He had been distant, always quiet and making spiteful comments, but I put it all down to stress when I spoke to him about it, he said he has a really exciting brand-deal which is sending us both to Hawaii, somewhere where we have both wanted to go for ages.
"Hey," I cooed, standing to my feet and placing a quick peck of a kiss on his lips. "How was your day? I missed you." I smiled, running my hands through his hair. "It was fine. I was only gone for a few hours, why'd you miss me that much?" He asked. "'Cause I love you, so I miss you." I stated, knowing what he was thinking. lately, he had been a little off whenever I have been romantic with him, telling him I missed him, that I love him, or any other normal husband and wife comments that he used to say to me, but now, now he asks me why I say those things in an annoyed tone; it's actually hurtful sometimes. I guess I can be dramatic or sensitive sometimes like most people are, but he's my best friend; I never thought he could upset me like he has lately.
"Of course you do." He said, his voice dripping with annoyance. "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, looking into his eyes for answers, but I was only greeted by yet another eye roll- the third one since he got home just a few seconds ago.
"Absolutely nothing, y/n." He stated, picking up his towel from the table. "I'm going to go shower." He breathed, his voice deep which signified he was both frustrated and tired. "okay..." I said quietly, knowing he heard me as he closed the en-suite door.
I decided to clean up the bedroom, so I went downstairs and filled a small bucket with soap and water to clean the surfaces in the bedroom, and placed the dirty bed-sheets inside the washing-machine, so that I could proceed to change the bed. It took me twenty minutes for so to clean the bedroom as well as a few minutes to put clean sheets on the bed, meanwhile Zach cleaned himself up for bed in the bathroom.
I smiled slightly as I glanced around the room after finishing the cleaning with a quick vacuum, the room smelling and looking perfect, fresh, and clean. I opened the door to the balcony to let some fresh air in, the smell of the honeysuckle plant outside the window making the room smell divine. Forty minutes passed and a pattered looking Zach came plodding out of the bathroom, his face freely shaved as he dragged his feet along the cream carpet tiredly, glancing at me stood on the balcony. I weakly smiled, walking back into the room where he sat on the bed and proceeded to pull on his black sweatshirt saying 'my girl is angel' on it with angel wings below the silver writing, which I got for him on our one year anniversary when we firs began dating. I couldn't help but feel a little sad when I saw him wearing it, because, as insecure as it sounds, I didn't feel like I was his angel anymore; I didn't feel like I was worthy of being his 'angel', nor did I feel as though he wanted me to be his 'angel' anymore. Needless to say once again, I am a little bit sensitive and I can be needy, he knew this. I never thought I would be dependent on someone, but as soon as I fell in love with Zach, that all changed. I had been through, like everyone has, through some damage, but I couldn't help it, which he was fully aware of. I never felt enough (u are, ok, I promise!) and he used to help me feel like I was so so so much more than enough, and even when I was apart from him, I felt like he had an impact on me big enough to make me feel more than enough without him, if I ever had to deal without him In my life- which happily, I didn't have to. but lately, while he's been distant, it made me feel like I've been on a roller-coaster, trying to get a hold of my emotions, because losing someone to distance of them not being being the person you love, is worse than losing them to distance in miles- because you don't ever truly have them.
I sighed as I sat beside him, debating whether or not to bring up the subject of him being distant over the past two weeks straight, and I decided to confront him. "Zach?" "Yeah?" He sighed heavily. That was the point where I felt that I was being way too... needy (btw, talking to someone isn't being needy, a problem shared is a problem halved!)
"Nothing, it's fine." I smiled, standing up to go and shower. "what were you going to ask me, y/n?" he asked in a slightly angry tone, his eyes watching my every move. "it's just... am I your angel anymore?" I asked, my voice tight as I held back my tears, causing it to crack at the end of my sentence. he looked down, guilt filling his eyes and posture as he shifted his weight from one leg to another. "y/n," he began, but this is when I began to get more angry than upset and sad. "no, Zach... I don't understand. you can go ahead and call me selfish, but I sometimes, like every single human being on this earth can't help it sometimes! I wanna know why my husband is treating me like I am clingy, annoying and completely and utterly needy!" I yelled, tears flowing down my cheeks freely. He tried to speak once again, but I interrupted him. "I know that I'm a little needy, but what happened to being your 'angel'?" I asked loudly, simulating quotation marks with my fingers. "did that change?" I asked weakly. "did you see how dependent I am on you? did that scare you? is it a burden? did it make you not love me anymore?" I rambled as my body wracked with sobs, and I could just about see Zach through my clouded eyes; he was crying. I calmed myself down as much as I could, then took a few steps towards him to see if my eyes were lying to me- but they were not.
"I'm sorry." I sniffed, wiping my wet cheeks. "Why do you always say 'sorry', when I am the one being nasty?" he cried with a cynical chuckle filled with both regret and sadness. "I have been anything but a loving husband to you the past two weeks, and you continue to be loving and sweet... What's that about?" He chuckled once again, his holding mine. "Because I love you Zach, I just hope you still feel the same about me." I sighed. "Of course I do, baby-girl. I'm so incredibly sorry I ever made you feel that I don't love you anymore, because it's the exact opposite. You are always my angel, and you are always perfect, and I will love you forever and always. You are not needy, or clingy nor are you annoying; I love that you miss me, it feels good to be needed. I love you so much, and I'm so sorry. There is absolutely no excuse for the way I've been treating you, however, I lost... I lost the brand-deal. All I wanted was to take you to Hawaii, because it's our three year anniversary in two months- it would be an early gift for us - that's all I wanted. They emailed me and told me that they gave it to someone else, that was all they told me. I guess I was distant because I was so ashamed and sad that I lost that experience for us, for you." He sniffed. I smiled softly, kissing him softly and running my hands through his luxurious hair. "You didn't lose it- they lost out on you." I softly spoke. "I love you so much, so you should tell mw these things. We tell each other everything, so don't start feeling like you can't tell me because you feel that you let me down... I will always love you and be with you, so there is no need to worry." I beamed.
"of course, baby... I'm sorry.." he smiled, kissing me. "how about we go to Hawaii anyway?" "really?!" I asked, jumping up and down like a child. "of course. grab the laptop, we'll book tickets now." he smiled, kissing my cheek.
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𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙨, 𝙨𝙤 𝙄 𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙣𝙟𝙤𝙮𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩! 𝙄 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙡' 𝙨𝙖𝙙, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙖 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙮 𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜. 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙖 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙙 𝙞𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨! 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚, 𝙫 𝙭𝙤𝙭𝙤