I felt dead.
At least on the inside—on the outside I was still feeling the aftermath of Ben and Dana tearing my ass a new one yesterday. I wasn't sure whether to be glad or annoyed that nothing eventful happened after my brother went all "Alpha Male" on my boyfriend and me. The most exciting thing (if you can even call it that) that happened was actually this morning, once I was free to leave the solitary confinement of my bedroom and go to school. I wasn't late when I left my house this morning, but I lost track of time while I was venting my frustration to Caroline (the only person that knew about my current boyfriend of four days).
"That's horrible," Caroline said after I finished explaining to her just how miserable my life was. "First Cooper gets involved in your love life, now Dana and Ben?"
"I know right?" I said as I slung my backpack over my shoulder. "I didn't expect them to be happy about me dating anybody, but all my brothers have definitely taken it too far."
"Well, all your brothers except for Owen ..." A concerned look crept onto Caroline's face when I didn't agree with her right away. "Right?"
"Apparently there was already some strong animosity between Owen and Zach before I came into the picture."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Owen wasn't just pissed that I brought a guy home, he seemed especially pissed that it was Zach."
"Weird," Caroline said as we started walking in the direction of Dana's class. "I wonder why."
"Penny!" A voice suddenly called from behind. Both Caroline and I stopped at the eagerness the voice seemed to have. I turned to find an equally eager-looking Emmett rushing towards us.
"Oh great," I said as I turned back around.
"Are you gonna talk to him?" Caroline asked as I started to walk again.
"Not today," I said. "I've got enough drama in my life right now."
"Penny! Wait!" It didn't take long for a persistent Emmett to catch up to us. "I need to talk to you."
"Not now, Emmett," I said as I continued down the hallway.
"Please?" He actually ran past us and then stopped in front of us so that I had to stop and listen to him. "It's really important."
"Well now's not a good time," I said as we turned the corner.
"I was gonna talk to you before soccer practice yesterday, but you weren't there," Emmett said just as the warning bell rang.
"I'm quitting soccer," I said as I sidestepped him and Caroline followed my lead. I was not gonna be late because of Emmett.
Emmett sighed as we started up the stairs. "Penny, I know what I did was terrible ... but don't quit soccer because of me."
"Trust me, Emmett, I'm not quitting because of you." Because of Zach maybe (since that would mean I'd have more time to hang out with him after school, the only time when I was free to do what I wanted without being under my brothers' complete control), but not because of Emmett. "I just have too much stuff on my plate to deal with right now. Something had to go, and it made the most sense for it to be soccer." Emmett opened his mouth to speak again, but I cut him off. "Now I really do have to go—I can't afford to be late to my brother's class today."
Fortunately Emmett left us alone after that and went off to his first class.
"Still think he's a douche?" Caroline asked as we quickly reached the third floor with less than twenty seconds to spare.
"More like a douchezilla," I said under my breath before entering Dana's classroom. The late bell rang just as I slowly and gingerly lowered myself down into my desk.
It wasn't long after Dana started the lecture of the day that I lost focus. There was a part of me that was annoyed that Emmett had the audacity to come up to me after what he did, and another part of me that was annoyed that it took him four damn days to do it. He didn't actually think that he still had a shot with me, did he? Because even if I wasn't dating Zach, it would take a whole lot for him to even get in my good graces again. And for the record, I didn't discriminate—Cooper still had a lot of making up to do if he wanted my forgiveness too.
"Penny!"
"Who what huh?" I said as my head shot up. I must have dozed off ... I honestly didn't even remember putting my head down! As my eyes focused on my surroundings, it became clear that I was in E212. I was grateful that I was in the art room and not my brother's classroom, so it was Ms. Corella who was standing over me and not Dana.
"Are you feeling all right?" Ms. Corella asked. There was a sincere hint of concern in her voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I sat up as straight as I could on my art stool, given my still hurting backside. "Just feeling a little tired, I guess."
"Why don't you go take a little walk?" she suggested. "Take a breather from all these paint fumes and get a drink at the fountain."
Her suggestion alone actually gave me a little more energy, not only because she was the nicest, coolest, most laid back teacher I had, but also because I wanted to take a walk to the water fountain more than anything.
"Thanks, Ms. Corella," I said as I slowly stood up. "I'll be right back." As I walked out the door, I thanked the heavens that I hadn't fallen asleep on my still-wet painting (but a few inches away from it instead). Not that I had been painting anything important anyway—before passing out, I remember Ms. Corella giving the instruction to just paint whatever emotion you're feeling right at that moment, so I was just painting Death using the darkest colors I could find. It was kind of sad, actually.
As I reached my destination, sure enough Zach was right where I expected him to be during his second period study. "Hey, Babe."
"Hey, you're alive," Zach said as he stood up from his leaning position by the water fountain. "I tried texting you last night but you didn't respond."
"Yeah, sorry. I left my phone downstairs after dinner and I was afraid if I went down to grab it, Dana would take it." I gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Oh, and try not to call or text me unless it's an emergency, because I overheard my brothers talking about how they're gonna start regularly checking my phone logs and reading my texts until they feel they can 'trust me' again."
"Will do," Zach said as he pulled me into a hug. I sighed heavily in his arms. "You okay, Pidge?"
"I was gonna ask you the same question." As Zach released me, I looked up into his mesmerizing eyes. "Sorry about what happened yesterday with my brothers. You shouldn't have had to go through that."
"No I'm sorry. I should have done more to protect you."
"Babe—"
"I'm serious, Penny." Zach sighed as he shook his head. "You continued to stand up for me, even when your brother looked about ready to kill you. I should have done the same."
"No." I gently took his face in my hands. "Listen to me. I'm glad you didn't argue with my brothers yesterday, because it would have made the situation we're in a thousand times worse. Trust me." Zach nodded as I dropped my hands and sighed. "But I was doing some thinking last night, and I think that it's probably better that we don't date each other."
Unsurprisingly, Zach looked shocked, caught off guard, and more than anything hurt. I was also pretty shocked at how easy it was for me to tell him that, because one of the last things I ever wanted to do was hurt Zach. But still, the very last thing I ever wanted to happen was for one or all of my brothers to find a way to hurt Zach or his future.
"What?" Zach managed to get out.
"At least until things calm down a bit with my brothers, or until they find a new male student to dislike more than you."
"Penny—"
"Which really shouldn't take that long now that I think about it."
"Penny—"
"I mean, my brothers hate any guy that even looks at me the 'wrong way' so—"
"Penny!" Zach said cutting me off as he took my hands in his. "I don't want to break up with you."
"C'mon, Zach. You're already in some pretty serious trouble for what happened yesterday, which was a whole lot of nothing. I know it seems like Dana just talks a big game sometimes, but his bark really is as bad as his bite. He has connections everywhere, and one bad word about you to the school board means that you can kiss the scholarship you're on goodbye."
"Let me worry about my scholarship," he said as he gently put one hand on my cheek.
"Zach—"
"Penny, I appreciate your concern for my wellbeing, but I'm willing to take a risk for you."
I gently took his hand off my cheek. "Well I don't want you to have to take that risk, because I would never forgive myself if things went horribly wrong."
"Well then how about this: until your brothers at least find me moderately tolerable, we'll keep our relationship on the down low. No one and I mean no one—not even our families or our closest friends—will know about it except you and me."
I stopped and thought for a moment. I wasn't against the idea completely; I just wasn't sure how well it would work ... and I was terrified of what would happen if it failed.
"As much as I like that idea, how in the world do you plan on getting my brothers to even remotely change their mind about you? You saw how well they listen to anything either of us have to say."
Zach smirked the same way he does whenever he has a "great" idea. "Just leave it to me, Pidge. Just leave it to me."