a/n: For those of you who received a notification telling you I updated chapter 40 Sorry for the slight mishap! I was actually editing the chapter on my phone and pressed the publish button accidentally. *face palm*
Anyway, here it is! A slightly longer chapter to make up for it.
Time adjustment: I just wanted to clear some things regarding the time. In my mind I had planned for this chapter to happen after winter break but then I realized I'd never actually mentioned winter break or the holidays in any way. Ups! --- one of the many things to check once I go over the book again.
Just know that the actual time here is between Jan-Feb. It doesn't really change much the main plot but when you start calculate the time didn't add up. Less than three months together? My, if they weren't fast. ^.^
Enjoy!
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You called? 19:21
Where are you? 19:21
Answer me 19:24
Answer me 19:30
You're starting to worry me
19:40
If you don't answer in the next fifty minutes I'm gonna tell mum you left with that scumbag and haven't returned yet 19:47
Don't try me sis. I'll do it 19:54
I lifted my eyes from the screen to the sleeping form lying on my couch. The blonde head peeked out of the comforter I'd laid over her a few minutes ago after she had finally fallen asleep.
Charlotte.
The owner of the phone whose brother was going crazy.
You might be wondering what was Charlotte doing at my house. Well, here's the recap of the last two hours.
The bell rang just as I was about to sit and go over my application forms. Mum had left half an hour ago on a date with Phil so I wondered who could be showing up at the doorstep until I peeked through the peephole and caught sight of her.
"Charlotte?" I asked surprised, opening the door with a yank.
Her face snapped up at the sound of my voice and my breathing stopped.
If the obvious signs that gave away her vulnerability passed on unnoticed at first by my confused daze, the tear streaks and the puffy eyes made me do a double take.
"Char?" I asked tentatively as I took a step closer. It was obvious she had been crying. And thinking that someone had made sweet pure Charlotte cry like that made me behave like a protective mother goose.
She bit her lip while nervously wringing her hands together, "Can I come in?"
I stepped aside immediately, leading her towards the couch.
It wasn't till I sat beside her and asked what was wrong that she lost it. She broke into more tears, sobbing against my T-shirt.
"H-he was right." Was the only thing that left her mouth for a while until she calmed down enough to explain what had happened.
My heart ached for her. It felt useless knowing the only thing I could do was draw her closer and squeeze her tighter.
Her phone buzzed again in my hand, drawing me back to the present.
Charlotte Goddammit! Answer the damn phone. 20:09
My heart flipped at what I was about to do. I would be lying if I said part of me wasn't looking forward to it.
I missed him.
I didn't want to but I did.
He had become such an essential part of my life in such a short time it terrified me. But I had time to think, and I knew he couldn't have feigned it. He had feelings for me. At least I hoped he did. The yearning in his gaze this past few days proved it.
Not thinking twice about it my thumb moved over the screen and hovered over the mic button. One breath in, one breath out. Chill.
Once I was sure my voice would not waver or crack I pressed down. "Hey...uhm...Char is here with me, I mean, at my house." I took a breath before continuing, "She wasn't feeling very well. Now she's passed out on the couch. I think...I think it would be best if you came get her? She wouldn't say it but she needs her brother right now." I sighed, stealing a glance at the couch. "Text me when you get here."
There was no need to ask if he would come. I knew he would. There wasn't a thing he wouldn't do for his sister.
My eyes stayed fixed on the chat until his next message popped up.
I'll be there in twenty
My stomach churned with nerves. Now that the first part was done I had to take several deep breaths to cool down.
Everything is fine. You got this.
Finished with my little peep talk I moved to the kitchen to fix me a cup of coffee in order to keep my hands occupied. The only drawback was my mind wasn't, quickly coming up with different scenarios of how this whole night could end.
I walked back to the living room, drinking my coffee slowly until the phone beeped again in my hand.
I'm here
That took fifteen minutes at most. Suddenly I was wondering why there wasn't more traffic on the streets.
My hands felt clammy as I approached the door. I couldn't believe I was so nervous to face him after everything we did. His hands had been in places I had never let anyone touch before and now, somehow, thinking about being in the same room with him brought goose bumps on my arms.
With one last breath of courage I opened the door and there he was, handsome as ever in a navy blue windbreaker. His deep green eyes studied my face intently.
"Hi" I said.
"Hey"
His voice made my heart pump faster. I bit my lip nervously as I looked over my shoulder in the direction of the couch. It never actually occurred to me how I would speak to him once he got here without waking Char.
"Can I come in?" He asked.
"Umh...yes."
He walked past me, his familiar fragrance hitting me on the face. I leaned back against the door, my eyes taking in his movements as he stopped in front of the couch, taking Charlotte in.
"What happened?" The barely controlled tone of his voice gave away how hard he was trying to control himself.
The last thing I wanted was for Char to wake up to a first row show of her brother's temper.
"Let's go upstairs." I said, moving towards the staircase not looking whether he followed or not. It took him a few seconds, but then I heard his footsteps as he climbed up.
I stopped in the middle of my room, watching as he stepped inside. I interrupted the perusal of his surroundings when I told him the reason his sister showed up at my door.
"Dylan broke up with her."
Ryan's eyes flashed, his nostrils flaring before he burst, "That fucking scumbag! I'm gonna kill him!"
I had predicted his reaction and quickly blocked his exit, one of my hands ending up pressed against his hard chest.
"Listen to me."
His wild eyes roamed my face before fixing on mine. "You need to hear everything."
The sound at the back of his throat let me know he didn't agree to that, but I held his stubborn gaze until he finally nodded, stepping back. I sighed in relief knowing I wouldn't have to resort to second measures in order to keep him here.
"Tell me." He ordered with a tip of his chin.
Without much preamble I lurched into a description of everything Char had told me a few hours before.
Ryan had to sit on the edge of my bed as he listened to my every word. His lips twisting every so often into a snarl.
"He said she is too good for him?" He interrupted me.
"That's what Char said. The reasons he gave for his actions were that their worlds were too different, that there were things he had done she wouldn't understand, and that she was too good for him. She even mentioned him saying he didn't deserve her."
Ryan rubbed his jaw, balling his hand into a fist and pressing it against his mouth as he considered this. "Know what the worst part is?" He finally asked.
"What?" I asked, realizing I somewhere along our conversation I had moved closer to him.
He dropped his fist to his thigh, eyes following the movement. "I can't hit him because I agree with the scumbag!"
A ghost of a smile tugged at my lips at his helpless frustration. I moved to sit beside him, covering his tight fist with my hand. "Char was afraid you'd be all 'I told you so' after learning the truth."
His eyes stayed fixed in our hands as he replied. "I would never do that to her."
I nodded. "I knew better."
My heart skipped a beat when his palm opened, fingers entwining with mine while his gaze devoured me on the spot.
"Kales" He breathed.
He got what I was trying to imply. I knew he wasn't a stuck up. He had grown, he cared about other people's feelings.
The hand that wasn't entwined with mine rose to palm my cheek. "I know I said I'd give you a week, but I need to get this out. I've needed to do it for a while. I should have never let you leave my room thinking you came second best because you don't." He let out a breath before continuing, "I should have told you this then, but it all came down on me out of the blue and it caught me off guard. Would you listen to me?"
I heard my heartbeat on my ears as I nodded slowly.
His whole body seemed to relax as he took in that simple action. His finger squeezed mine once before his gaze fixed on mine. "You are the only one for me." His words drew a sharp breath out of me. "That day...when you showed me that picture I freaked out. I'm sorry I didn't explain it to you then, but...you might have reminded me of Kim at first but not anymore. You do not resemble Kim any more than Katy Perry does Zooey Deschanel. That's just the package, but the inside is all you. The you that called me out when I was being a prick, the you that would laugh with my mum while she told you the most embarrassing stories, the you that would make every cell in my body come alive, the you that would care for my sister and be there for her. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Kalley, I love you."
My mind couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry as I heard his words. The few reservations I might have had crumbled when my eyes met his. The longing and fear in them showing me how important this moment was to him. He was afraid of what I'd say.
"Well," I smiled weakly, my voice scratchy as I whipped away a tear that escaped my eye. "At least you are able to differentiate us."
The tension in his body left him and he released his grip on my hand to cup my face between his, dropping his forehead against mine. "You are nothing like her. What we have, what I feel is all for you. You are the sweetest, most selfless person I've ever known. And you might be too good for me, I might not deserve you, but I'm not idiot enough to let you go."
My vision turned blurry with unshed tears. His fervent words resonated in my mind as I tried to get a grip on my emotions.
He was here. And he apologized. And he said he loved me.
And I loved him.
We've both had enough of living in the past, it was time to look into the future.
My free hand moved behind his head and I drew courage from his intense gaze to say the words that escaped my lips next. "I love you too."
I watched his eyes smolder before his mouth came down on mine.