--- KAT ---
Kat took a deep breath of fresh air – well, as fresh as it could be with a gaggle of smokers stood nearby. Kat was outside The Jar Cross, the dingiest club in Camden, having a moment to herself before the show. She had a feeling this was going to be their worst gig ever. The band was on the verge of a break-up or break-down, she wasn’t sure which yet.
Amy was still adamant that she was leaving. Molly had been in tears after an emotional phone call with her sister. Rhian had convinced her mum to let her stay until the Festival but she was still upset about something. Lena had been frantically trying to find them some cheap accommodation until the situation with Amy was resolved. And Jadine seemed generally annoyed with everyone.
Kat knew she wasn’t on top form either – she was still thrown by Lena’s attempt to ‘out’ her in the bar last night. Kat had always known that she wasn’t particularly attracted to boys, but figured that she’d grow into them once she found one she really liked. It wasn’t as if she was obsessed with girls either. Until recently she hadn’t even hung out with them that much.
But then she’d met Lena. Kat had been drawn to her, intrigued by her, wanted to spend time with her – whatever, but that didn’t mean that she was a lesbian. Did it? Kat didn’t know what to think anymore.
She was also concerned about what was going on back home. She hadn’t spoken to Dani for three days, so she’d called her Auntie Vi instead, who’d told her everything was fine at home, apart from Lucas going to hospital with a broken arm.
“How did he break it?” Kat had asked frantically.
“Your papa said he fell off the banister,” said Vi. “Don’t worry so much Katya. Little boys are always climbing things and having accidents.”
If Vi had been talking about Stefan, then Kat would have been reassured – he was always clambering over everything – but little Lucas was different. He was scared to go down the slide without someone holding his hand, why would he be climbing up the banister? Something didn’t feel right.
Just then Lena appeared. “Hey, how you doing?”
“Fine,” said Kat, in a non-committal tone.
“I get the feeling you’re ignoring me today,” said Lena, cutting to the chase.
“No,” said Kat. “There’s a lot going on that’s all.”
“Damn right there is,” said Lena. “I haven’t been able to find anywhere affordable for you all to stay yet. You may end up crashing on my couch. Which I imagine wouldn’t thrill you.”
“Why?” asked Kat.
“Well, you scooted out of the bar pretty quick last night,” smiled Lena. “Did Alice and I shock you?”
“No,” lied Kat. “I had to get back, that’s all.”
“Look, I’m sorry if I jumped to the wrong conclusion about you,” added Lena.
Kat pretended to be preoccupied with ‘people-watching’.
“Did I jump to the wrong conclusion?” probed Lena.
“What do you want me to say?” snapped Kat. “That I’m a raging lesbian?”
“Well, I wouldn’t put it quite like that…”
“Because I don’t know, alright?” shot back Kat.
“And that’s okay, too,” said Lena. “Look, I didn’t want to make you feel bad. I just wanted you to know that if you ever need anyone to talk about it, I’m here. I have firsthand experience of dealing with it,” she smiled. “I came out, when I was 17 so…”
“I’m not you. I might not even have to…” Kat could hardly bring herself to say it. “…come out.”
“But if you do, I’m here,” said Lena smoothly. “Now, let’s get inside. You’ve got a show to do.”
Kat pulled Lena back. “Please don’t tell the girls about this,” she pleaded. “I don’t want to give them any more reasons to think I’m a weirdo.”
“Being a lesbian, doesn’t mean you’re a weirdo,” chuckled Lena.
“Whatever,” said Kat, shuffling towards the entrance.
“Hey, aren’t you in the band?” said a girl near the door.
Kat was taken aback – she’d never been recognised before.
“Yeah, she is,” said another girl. “She’s Kat.”
“We love your music,” said the first girl.
“Yeah, we checked out Halle Wise’s page today and when we saw you were playing here tonight, we had to come down.”
“See you before you get famous,” giggled the first girl.
“Will you sign my flyer?” said the second.
“And mine?” said the first girl.
“Can we get all of the band’s autographs?”
“I’m sure we can arrange that,” said Lena, deftly stepping in. “Come and meet them after the show.”
Lena ushered Kat inside and whispered, “I definitely sense a tipping point!”
Despite herself, Kat couldn’t resist a shiver of delight. Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad after all.
An hour later, and the girls had rocked it. The crowd, their biggest yet, loved their set. And they even recognised a couple of faces in the audience – people were starting to come to their gigs for a second and third time. But one face stood out more than the rest – it was Amy’s dad, Maurice.
“Girls, that was bloody amazing,” enthused Maurice. “I’ve heard you prancing about at home, but I never expected you to be that good!”
“Dad, what are you doing here?” said Amy rushing over and giving him a bear hug.
“I wanted to see you all before my operation,” said Maurice. “And tell you all that you don’t have to move out.”
“But dad, you need to rest when you get back home.”
“Well, I expect you all to make me a cup of tea when I holler for one,” laughed Maurice.
“Be serious,” said Amy.
“I am,” said Maurice.
“But dad, I’m going to quit,” said Amy.
“Have I brought you up to give up that easily?” asked Maurice.
“No, but…”
“Would I be running the South East’s largest soft furnishings enterprise if I gave up at the first hurdle?” said Maurice.
“Dad, there’s been more than a few hurdles.”
“Well, you’ve just got to keep jumping over ‘em,” rallied Maurice, before speaking more softly. “Sweetheart, I know I pressured you to come and work at the store, but seeing little Rhian’s mum trying to drag her home made me realise I shouldn’t interfere with your life. I know Diane was only doing what she thought best, but we’ve had our turn - it’s your go now.”
Kat and the girls shared a look, wondering if they should leave Amy and Maurice alone, but before they could sneak off Maurice boomed, “Plus, I want something to look forward when I come out. Your mum told me you’ve got a Festival or something?”
“It’s no big deal,” said Amy.
“Is that true?” Maurice asked the other girls.
“It’s a major deal,” said Jadine.
“Then you’d better be in tiptop shape for it,” said Maurice. “So I insist you stay.”
“But dad,” said Amy quietly. “What if the operation doesn’t go well?”
“Haven’t I always taught you to think positive, sweetheart?”
“Yes, but…”
“Then think positive,” said Maurice, pulling Amy close and giving her a kiss on her forehead.
Suddenly Kat felt a stab of loneliness. She wished she had a father who adored her. She knew her mama loved her, but where was she exactly? Paris? Or had she gone back to Poland? Kat didn’t even know. As she looked around the girls, she wished she had Dani by her side. She missed her sister so much it hurt right now.
“You okay?” asked Lena quietly.
“Yes,” said Kat. “Just thinking about home.”
Lena smiled and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
Just then the two girls Kat had met outside the club earlier bounded over.
“You were all amazing!” squealed the first girl.
“My favourite song is Same Star,” said the second.
“Kat wrote that,” said Amy. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”
“Totally!” enthused the girls together.
Kat was taken aback. Had Amy really just paid her a compliment?
“I’m sorry about what I said to you earlier, about your dad,” said Amy, as the other girls signed a flyer for the girls. “I was upset – about mine.”
“I understand,” said Kat.
“I am glad you’re in the band, you know,” said Amy.
“Does that mean you’re staying then?” asked Molly.
“I guess it does,” said Amy.
“Yay!” cheered Jadine.
“So does that mean I don’t have to go back to Wales - ever?” asked Rhian.
“It means we have to use the Soundscaper Festival to get a recording contract,” said Jadine.
As Maurice got the girls some well-earned drinks, Lena drew them all close together again. “There’s one thing I didn’t mention earlier,” she said. “It’s about one of the other acts on the bill.”
“Oh yes, who’s on there with us?” asked Kat.
“Olivia.”
“Olivia who?” asked Rhian.
“Your ex-band mate – Olivia Gordon-Webb. Or as she’s calling herself now – Olivia G.”
“Seriously?” asked Amy.
“She’s recorded some songs with Tony Ward and he’s convinced she’s exactly the female pop act that Glenn Davies needs for Riva Records.”
“No way!” said Molly.
“Yep,” said Lena. “Apparently they’re an item now Sherri Holt is back with James Holland.”
“Sherri’s taken James back?” cried Jadine.
“Apparently she crumbled and took him back when she lost her baby.”
“I didn’t know she’d lost her baby,” said Molly.
“Apparently she had a miscarriage a couple of months ago,” said Lena.
“That’s terrible,” sighed Molly. “I hope she’s okay.”
“Even so, I don’t know why she’s taken James back. What is wrong with some women?”
“Love can make you do stupid things,” said Amy, looking bashfully at Molly.
“It isn’t just love that does that,” said Rhian. “When we get back I’ve got something to tell you – about last night.”
As they headed home, Kat had the feeling that they were starting afresh and that this time they were all at a new beginning together.