This isn't a story or poem. This is just me talking alright?
It's weird as I would usually communicate with all of you through my works like my rather distressing poems or unusual short story concepts. Let's be honest, they aren't all that normal. But today it's just me listening to Tame Impala, Khalid, Arctic Monkeys and The House Targeryen theme song while I inform you of where I am.
So first order of business I think I should address is this book. I don't know where or how I'm supposed to end this. With what material. On which emotion, on which chapter. I do know however that I don't want it going past 50. That's my limit. Originally this book was just an outlet for me to improve my writing but slowly it turned into more, it became a channel to broadcast my raw, inner feelings. My personal turmoil and battles. And yes, somehow I feel more comfortable about writing about it here than writing it in my personal journal and having it for only me to see. Maybe I'm an attention whore. Or maybe its the fact that the way I put this out is considered art. I love this art, this way of expressing feelings by just using words. It's a skill honestly, you can't just use any words. You have to use THE words.
I like the fact that I could write anything and have two or three different people decipher it in anyway they please. That's amazing.
Locally, I was toying with the idea of creating a new short story. For those of you who don't know I live in the Caribbean, more specifically Trinidad. Yes, even though I am a teenager who lives on a tropical island which doesn't phase me at all. I remember summer that passed my friends and I had mental breakdowns because we didn't leave our house for days at a time and we were tired of it. We wanted to go out and do something. We kept talking about the fact that we are on a tropical island and we could do so much but we stay inside on our phones all day, going to school looking paler than before because we weren't spending our days on the beach getting so tanned that you couldn't even recognize us. And sometimes it disturbs me of my reality that I have so much, and I waste it.
Anyways the idea was to create a short story highlighting summer on a "island" for teenagers. Basically a group of friends. Maybe one or two of them are moving away when September starts for college but basically they decide to be young and stupid and explore the island. Pulling all nighters and driving to the opposite coast to watch the sunrise. It's, I guess it could be aesthetically pleasing to some. The idea is kind of "Call me by your name" but honestly I'm not trying to take it from that.
One of my last points is my future. I DO NOT LIKE SCHOOL. I mean I do well in it but if I had a choice I would be home. You see I don't know what I want to do with my life except what I've always wanted to be. A person involved in Youtube, someone who can use their personalities instead of their passes. I like expressing myself and being comedic. School for me, is draining and a waste of my time when I could already be putting myself out there and be in LA right now. It's not about the fame or fans. I don't care about that. I care about trying to do something that makes me happy, with money. Using what I have the way I want to is important for me. If I go into corporate by default. I will actually kill myself. NO JOKE.
Is this it? Oh my God...did I just blog? Wow.
Well anyways Goodbye. And can I just add? Game of Thrones episode 4 season 8...WHAT EVEN?