I am a firm believer of destiny.
Ako yung klase ng tao na naniniwala na lahat ng mga nangyayari ay may dahilan. That fate always meddles with things so they will be put everything in their right place. I think that regardless of the choices we make, mapupunta at mapupunta pa rin tayo sa kung saan tayo nakatadhana malagay.
Napabuntong hininga ako. Hindi ko magawang kalimutan ang pag-uusap namin ni Tita Eliana noong nakaraan.
Part of me really feels sorry for her. Just knowing na nagkaanak ang asawa mo sa ex nito na sobrang minahal nito ay sobrang sakit talaga. I must know because that's what I felt with Maoi many years ago too. I remember feeling so intimidated and frustrated dahil alam kong sobra siyang minahal ni Blaise.
Paano pa kaya kay tita na kahit kasal na sila ay hindi pa rin siya nagawang mahalin nang buo ni Tito Franz? I can't even imagine where she got the guts to continue being with him through the years despite na alam niyang wala sa kanya ang buong pagmamahal nito. Kahit na nga ba may mga anak sila. Actually I think mas masakit nga yun eh. May mga anak sila pero si tito ay ganun pa rin.
I really do feel bad for her and God knows that pero hindi pa rin ata tama na madamay ako – kami, ng mga anak ko. It should be just between her and his husband. Hindi ata tama na kami ang magdusa sa kasalanan ng magulang ko dahil ibang tao naman ako sa kanila. It's just unfair na iwan ko si Blaise para sa mga pangyayari na hindi ko na mababago o wala naman kinalaman.
"Noong mga nakaraan ko pa napapansin na tulala ka. Is there something bothering you?" Blaise asked worriedly as he caressed my cheeks.
Mabilis akong umiling. I know I promised that this time I will trust him pero sa tingin ko mas makabubuti kung itatago ko na lang sa kanya yun. The last thing I want now ay pati sila ng mommy niya ay magkagalit din. Masyado na kaming maraming problema at ayoko nang dumagdag pa.
His eyes are telling me that he doesn't believe me so with all my might, I mustered a big smile.
"Wala talagang bumabagabag sa'kin. It's just, I am curious kung saan pumunta si Tito Franz after natin sabihin sa kanya yung kay Kuya GD" I lied though somewhat, I am really curious about that.
He smiled weakly at that. "Do you really want to know?" I nodded
"The warden where your dad is staying called me that night and said na nandun daw si daddy and wants to kill your dad. Nang-agaw daw ng baril si daddy doon. He was crying so hard while cursing Tito Armando. They didn't know how to stop him so I told them na hampasin sa ulo para mahimatay tapos saka nila alisin sa lugar na yun. Thankfully it went well" he said tonelessly na para bang balewala lang sa kanya ang nangyari.
"I know dad has a lot of reasons to get mad pero hindi pa rin tama na makapatay siya lalo na kung ang papatayin niya ay tatay ng pinaka mamahal ko. Thinking of it, kung sila ng mommy ang nagkatuluyan e di wala tayong dalawa"
He has a point there pero hindi pa rin nun nabawasan ang bigat na nararamdaman ko. No matter how we justify it, may mga nasasaktan pa rin talaga.
He curled his arms around my waist and buried his face on the crook of my neck.
"Kamusta na ang mga baby ko?" he asked as he caressed my stomach.
"We're good, daddy" I answered in my baby voice.
"You're not giving mommy a hard time, arent' you?" natatawang sabi niya as he lift up my dress this time and kiss my stomach.
"No, daddy. Ikaw lang naman po dyan yung pasaway eh" we both laughed at that.
"How many more kids are we going to make? I want a big family with you, babe. I won't really mind kahit sampu pa ang maging anak natin basta ikaw ang nanay nila"
Supposedly, dapat kiligin ako sa sinabi niya di ba? Pero hindi ko napigilan yung kaunting lungkot na gumuhit sa dibdib ko.
Isn't it that we should talk about marriage first bago palakihin ang pamilya namin? Talaga bang hanggang dito na lang kami? Is this all we can ever be?
Yet ayoko naman na i brought out yun. Ayokong magmukhang desperada. If he really wants to marry me, he will without me even asking.
"Grabe ka naman sa sampu. Hey remember, we are going to have twins. Dalawa agad itong aalagaan natin. Para siguro sa'yo madali lang kasi hindi naman ikaw ang magbubuntis at magpapadede sa kanila" I faked a wounded face and look away from him. He laughed at that.
"Kung pwede nga lang na ako ang magbuntis eh. You think I feel good whenever your back and legs hurt at the middle of the night? There are times that I pray na ilipat sa'kin ang mga sakit na nararamdaman mo"
I felt the burning of my cheeks at that. I inched my face towards him and gave him a light kiss on the lips.
"I love you" I whispered
"I love you more" he whispered back. "You're my world, babe. I am nothing without you"
I can't help but smile at his sincerity and I don't doubt it.
Isa na lang talaga ang kulang sa'min.
"Well, I know that it's boring you already na nandito ka lang sa bahay so I am thinking of going out today"
I pouted "Lalabas tayo? What if, may mangyari ulit na kagaya nung dati? And.. aren't you bothered? Kapag nalaman ng iba na.. nabuntis mo ako, baka pati sila magalit sa'yo"
He tsked and shook his head. "Do you think I will mind what other people will say about me? About us? People can say whatever they want for all we care, but why should we care about it?" he shifted from his seat and cupped both my cheeks. I didn't answer.
"Come on, let's go. Anyway, wala naman masyadong tao sa pupuntahan natin and it's just nearby. Hindi tayo lalabas ng village"
I just nodded and he told me to stay put as he get a sweater for me. When we're all set, we held hands together and went out.
Napangiti ako once we're on the street. The rush of the fresh air feels strange already dahil sa tagal ba naman na nasa loob na ako ng bahay. The street as well almost feels mundane.
Blaise put my hand in his pocket until we arrived in a playground.
There's no one around which is really good.
"Come on, sit here. I will push you" pinaupo niya ako sa swing then he softly pushed it.
"Why don't you sit beside me?" tanong ko sa kanya
"Nah, I'm good"
When I've had enough of it, niyaya ko siyang umupo sa bench. We chose the one under a tree.
"Let's take a selfie" sabi niya as he put his arm around my shoulder and we pose for the camera. He then put his lips on my cheek then pressed it.
"You could've just asked me if you can kiss me and I will say yes. Hindi mo na kailangan dumiskarte dyan" I said and rolled my eyes. He laughed and brushed his hair with his fingers. I narrowed my eyes when I notice na parang mayroon siyang gustong sabihin pero nagdadalawang isip siya.
"What is it?" tanong ko. He looked at me then let out a heavy sigh.
"Well, I'm wondering if you will say yes if I ask you this" sabi niya and he kneeled in one knee. I am certain that my jaw is dropped pero hindi ko magawang magsalita.
He fumbled something from his pocket and when he got it, it's a small square shaped box. He opened it and a diamond ring sits on the middle of it.
"Damn, my heart is pounding so hard right now pero wala nang atrasan to.. I know I have hurted you in the past and said things out of my anger and jealousy. I know I don't deserve you but I love you so much.."
Hindi pa rin ako makapagsalita. Damn, it seems like I am just dreaming.
"Arya Astrid Fonacier, will you marry me? Do you want to have me by your side forever? Do you want me stay with you until our old age and watch our kids grow up and have their own family?"
At this point, I just find myself crying. Iniisip ko lang ang tungkol dito kanina and now this is happening already.
"Alam mo ba na kanina lang iniisip ko kung may balak ka bang pakasalan ako o hanggang dito na lang tayo. I was even thinking that it's okay with me kahit hindi mo na ako pakasalan, tutal lagi ka naman nasa tabi ko at pinararamdam sa'kin ang pagmamahal ko. I was ready to live with that as long as you're in it" mas lalong lumakas ang iyak ko.
He's now kneeling on his both knees then he made me looked up to him. Even with my tears soaked face, he inched closer to me and kissed me.
"I'm sorry if I worried you. When I came back at may nangyari sa'tin, gustong-gusto ko na bumalik sa'yo nun. When I was in States isinumpa ko sa sarili ko na kapag nagharap tayo sisiguraduhin ko na wala na akong nararamdaman para sa'yo. But I was very wrong at that. When I saw you again that night.. alam kong ikaw pa rin at wala nang magbabago. I was furious dahil akala ko ay kayo pa rin ni Patrick. At mas lalo akong nagalit dahil mahal pa rin kita that I even allowed myself to be your side dish" he laughed at the last part.
"This ring has been in my pocket for a while now. It's just, I don't know if you would want to marry me now lalo na sa mga nangyayari ngayon. I thought you wouldn't want that and I don't think I can take it if you will decline my proposal"
It's my turn to laugh now. "I will marry you, Blaise Rafaelo Gandia. I want you to stay by my side forever and stay with me until our old age and watch our kids grow up and have their own family. I don't think I can spend my life with someone else but you. So it's a yes!"
At first he's just looking at me and then he put the ring around my ring finger. It fits perfectly.
He then pulled my face to him and this time he kissed me harder and deeper. I put my arms around his neck to steady our kiss. We only stopped when we felt the need to breathe.
"You won't regret this, babe. God, how I love you so much" he said as he claimed my lips once again.
---
Blaise isn't home because he had to go to the resto dahil may meeting sila ng mga empleyado niya sa resto. Gusto niya na isama ako but I insisted na ayoko so he called Kristel para samahan ako habang wala siya.
"Akala ko talaga dati wala ng pag asa si Kuya magbago. Did he tell you the things he's done in New York? He was a different person then" Kristel said as she sit on the couch.
I laughed at that. "Yeah, he told me everything and I feel bad about it dahil kasalanan ko naman yun. Kung hindi lang ako natakot nun, if I only trusted him and our love for each other, hindi kami maghihiwalay at hindi niya nagawa ang mga bagay na yun" nahihiyang sabi ko.
She snorted at that. "Well, I guess it's the universe's conspiration na paghiwalayin muna kayo because it wanted to teach you something. People need to grow and sometimes they grow apart and it's okay. Ang mahalaga ngayon, kayo na ulit at magpapakasal na!" she said giddily. Hindi ko itinago ang pagkagulat.
"Alam niyo na? How come?" I asked
"He called last night and told mom and dad" she shrugged
I swallowed hard. "Well.. what did they say about it? Okay lang ba sa kanila?" I am actually wondering what is Tita Eliana's reaction. I know she doesn't feel good about it. It's what she used to make me believe that Blaise doesn't love me.
"Wala naman problema. You know Kuya Blaise, he doesn't care about what other people think. Kahit pa kami na family niya. He will still do it kapag gusto niya. He's unstoppable"
I just nodded at that and resumed crocheting. I looked up on the internet how to do this and surprisingly it's easy especially that there are videos so I told Blaise to buy the materials I need. I intend to make hats for the little ones.
"Ikaw pala kamusta na? Are you dating someone already? You're so beautiful it's impossible na walang nanliligaw sa'yo" I said opening a topic. And I am curious as well. Kristel grew up so beautiful that no wonder Blaise is a strict of a brother.
"Well, not yet. I don't know if dad and kuya will be able to handle it once I get myself a boyfriend. Though to be honest, I am really not interested. Saka na lang kapag doktor na ako. I want to accomplish that first before anything else. I am a strong independent woman who doesn't need a man" she said proudly.
"That's great to hear. But if you have boy problems, you know that I will always be here for you. If in future you will find it hard to tell your brother that you have a boyfriend already, just tell me and we'll handle him together" natatawang sabi ko.
"Hahaha, thanks Ate Ari"
"You're welcome"
She tuned in Netflix while I busy myself again with what I am doing. Kapag natapos ko to I am sure na matutuwa ang fiance ko. I am also thinking of doing for the two of us once I am done with these.
Ni sa panaginip hindi ko inakala na magkaka interes ako sa paggawa ng ganito because I thought it's too old fashioned. Now, wala akong ginawa rito sa bahay kung hindi mag ganito na hindi ko na nga napapansin ang oras.
Biglang tumunog ang doorbell so I looked up automatically. Nagkatinginan kami ni Kristel.
"Tao po? Nandyan po ba si Arya Astrid Fonacier? Delivery po from BFC" the person from the outside called out.
I narrowed my eyes. Hindi naman ako umorder.
"Ako ang bahala ate" Kristel said and she's the one who opened the door. True enough it's a delivery guy from BFC. Mayroon itong hawak na dalawang malaking paperbag.
Another guy then just popped out of nowhere at may hawak itong malaking bato. Before I could open my mouth naihampas niya na yun sa ulo ni Kristel.
I looked horrified as I watch Kristel collapsed on the ground unconscious with her head bleeding. My eyes automatically grabbed the scissor near me and throw it but the guy missed it.
My heart is pounding so hard it wants to go out of my chest. Kinakabahan ako pero hindi para sa sarili ko. Kinakabahan ako para sa mga anak ko.
"Sino kayo at anong kailangan niyo sa'kin?!" sinikap ko na patatagin ang boses ko kahit na nga ba gustong-gusto ko na umiyak sa takot.
The guy who hit Kristel stepped forward. I automatically stepped back pero napaupo lang ako ulit sa couch. I have nowhere to run now at natatakot din ako magkamali ng kilos. Kung ako lang ang mapapahamak wala naman problema pero hindi eh.
He fumbled something from the back pocket of his pants and he revealed a gun. He aimed it at my stomach.
"No!" I yelled and hugged my stomach in attempt to protect it from him. "Sino ba kayo at ano ang kasalanan ko sa inyo?!"
He smiled creepily and even tilted his head on the side. "Walang personalan, trabaho lang to. Napag-utusan lang kami na dukutin ka. Huwag ka mag-alala wala naman kaming gagawin sa'yo na masama basta wala kang gagawin din na hindi maganda"
I shook my head. "Hindi ako lalaban basta huwag niyo lang ako sasaktan" pagmamakaawa ko.
---
Hindi ko alam kung nasaan ako. I can't even see what my surrounding looks like but one thing is for sure. I am lying on a metal table. The coldness of it is almost painful.
Tinalasan ko ang pakiramdam ko. I can hear distinct voices from afar.
Kahit na ayoko ay sumama ako sa mga lalaking yun dahil ayoko na mapahamak. I walked with them casually hanggang sa makasakay kami sa puting van. May iba pa silang kasama. Once I am already inside they injected something to me then I felt myself passed out. When I woke up nandito na ako. I have no idea where is this place pero isa lang ang natitiyak ko. Malayo kami sa mga tao. They didn't bother to even cover my mouth because maybe they think it's useless kahit sumigaw ako dahil wala naman makaririnig sa'kin.
I can't even begin kung sino ang nagpa kidnap sa'kin. There are so many possible people na pwedeng gumawa nito especially with the family secret being out.
Naramdaman kong nanigas ang katawan ko when I hear sharp footsteps na palapit nang palapit. It seems like one of them is wearing a pair of high heeled shoes dahil sa matinis na tunig nito.
It then stopped and if my guess is correct, nasa paanan ko sila banda.
"Tanggalin niyo ang piring niya" my eyes widened upon hearing that voice.
A blinding light welcomed me that I had to close my eyes for a couple of seconds. Nang dumilat ako ulit, I am already able to adjust with the brightness already and slowly I looked doon sa pinanggalingan ng boses.
Tita Eliana.
"Tita.. ano po tong ginagawa niyo?" my voice is in mixture of anger and betrayal. I looked around and there are atleast ten men here kasama yung dalawa na kumuha sa'kin sa bahay. There's I guess, a doctor beside her dahil sa pananamit nito.
She stared at me with cold eyes "I warned you. Didn't I? But you didn't listen.." she said in an icy tone.
I sighed frutstratedly as I burst into tears. "Tita.. please, wag mo kaming sasaktan ng mga anak ko. I'll do anything you like huwag mo lang kaming saktan. Please, I am begging you" pagmamakaawa ko sa kanya. I am willing to do everything huwag niya lang kami sasaktan – lalo na ang mga anak ko.
For a moment there akala ko ay pinakinggan niya ako but her face is telling me otherwise. His lips then curled into smirk.
"There's no sense bargaining with you. I know how cunning you are. Your mother caused me so much pain at ikaw ang pagbabayarin ko sa mga kasalanan niya" she walked towards me and gripped my hair so tight that I am wincing in pain.
"Hindi ko na siya magagantihan kaya ikaw na lang ang sasaktan ko. I will take away what you value the most dearly" she whispered angrily at basta na lang akong binitawan kaya nauntog ako sa mesa.
She walked away from me again and signed something to the man that I supposed the doctor. Doon ko lang napansin na mayroon pala siyang dalang bag. He nodded then put the bag on the table. I watched him carefully as he open the bag at mayroon siyang kunin na mga gamit mula roon. Nagsuot siya ng surgical gloves and he's s holding some pointed objects.
My eyes widened at the realization of what he's maybe planning to do. Sinubukan kong pumiglas mula sa pagkakatali sa'kin but it's useless.
"Please, no!" I yelled but he didn't listen. I looked at Tita Eliana and she's just staring at nothing.
"Tita, please.. ano po ba ang gusto mo? If you want me out of Blaise's house sige gagawin ko. Just give me a chance to give birth to my children. I promise pagtapos nun maglalaho na lang ako na parang bula. Please, wag lang ganito. Do not hurt my children!" I am already screaming but she still remain unfazed.
"Hindi 'to parte ng usapan.." one of the men said sa isa pa niyang kasama. Hindi nagtagal ang pagtingin ko sa kanya dahil napatingin ulit ako roon sa doktor who's now disinfecting a scalpel with an alcohol.
"No, please no!" I yelled again, hoping and hoping na bigla na lang siyang saniban ng anghel at tigilan na kung ano man ang gagawin niya.
I can't lose my children. I won't lose them.
"Parang kagat lang to ng langgam tapos wala na" he's about to poke my stomach with the scalpel when suddenly we heard a gunshot.
All of them were surprised even Tita Eliana but before any of them could react napaliligiran na sila.
My pack is here.
"Mom?" Blaise asked in disbelief upon seeing Tita Eliana. He then looked at me. "What's this? Anong nangyayari rito? Explain!" his voice is so loud that it echoed through out the room.
Tita Eliana remained cold and in one quick movement she got hold of the scalpel and put it on my neck.
"This girl has to die, Rafaelo! Ikaw, habang lumalaki ka nasaksihan mo kung ilang beses akong umiyak dahil kay Alenna! Siya ang may kasalanan kung bakit hindi ako nagawang mahalin ng husto ng daddy mo! Sumpa ang pamilya nila sa pamilya natin!"
"Let her go, mom. Fucking let her go unless kung gusto mo na talikuran na rin kita" Blaise said coldly.
"Alenna?" it's Tito Franz who popped out of nowhere and his reaction is like Blaise's last time. Mas lalong nakadagdag sa gulat niya nang makita ako.
"What do you think you're doing right now?! Arya is your son's fiancee and the mother of his children!" he yelled
Tita Eliana tsked. "Oh yeah.. sobrang boto ka sa kanya because you're still thinking of Alenna, aren't you? Akala mo ba hindi ko narinig ang sinabi mo sa anak mo kagabi? That you're what? You're happy na magpapakasal sila dahil sa pamamagitan ni Arya para na rin kayong naging pamilya ni Alenna?" her voice is evidently hurt. Tito Franz has no answer at that.
"Your daughter is in hospital right now because of her head injury. Nagawa mong mag-utos sa ibang tao na saktan ang sarili nating anak?"
"No.. wala akong inutos na ganyan!"
"Kristel was with Arya when these bastards came to our house!" it's Blaise and he's furious.
Tita dropped the scalpel at naihilamos niya ng palad niya ang mukha niya.
"No.. I didn't mean –"
"I don't regret having Blaise and Kristel as my children pero nagsisisi ako na pinakasalan kita. I should've not given you a chance. Bago tayo magpakasal nun, wala akong ipinangako sa'yo though I told you that I will try my best to love you. I did love you, El. I did. Hindi kasing lalim ng pagmamahal ko kay Alenna but I still fucking did. And this is what you're gonna do? Papatay ka ng tao? You will kill Arya just because you're insecure of her mother?"
Walang naisagot doon si tita. Blaise then walked to me at inalalayan ako. I automatically hugged him.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly as he checked me. I nodded at him. I'm okay now, now that he's here.
He looked again at the people around us. Tinapunan niya nang masamang tingin yung mga lalaki na nakaluhod na ngayon sa harapan ng Hunter Fourteen Plus then to his mom.
"Clean up the mess here, dad. Aalis na kami ni Arya"