That night , l couldn't sleep properly. I kept tossing and turning in my blankets. Every time l closed my eyes , my mother's sad face drifted before my eyes.
I looked at Lola who was sleeping peacefully besides me. She came to sleep in my room tonight to keep me company. But despite her presence , l couldn't sleep.
I slowly got up from bed and tiptoed to my dressing table careful not to awaken Lola. I opened one of the drawers and took out some sleeping pills. I took three and popped them in my mouth before grabbing a glass on water and gulped to wash them down.
I went back to bed and surprisingly , l fell asleep almost immediately. I was awaken the next day by golden sun rays filtering through the drapes.
The other side of the bed was empty meaning Lola was already downstairs making preparations for the funeral. I sat up in bed feeling depressed . Today was the day l was going to send away my parents. It's painful l tell you.
I reluctantly went into the bathroom and took a shower. Twenty minutes later , l was walking out of room clad in a black dress and black hat.
I had bought this attire when l was going to my aunt's funeral two years ago. I never imagined that l was going to wear it again to my own parent's funeral so soon.
Life is never fair. Always full of shit and surprises.
I almost bumped into a broad chest in the corridor. I stumbled in my heels about to fall but a muscular hand shot out and grabbed my waist.
I looked up feeling relieved and was surprised to see Ferracco's smiling face . He released my waist and l murmured a " thank you" . He was still wearing last night's clothes which was a dark blue jean and a white T-shirt that hugged his large frame like a second skin displaying his muscles.
"What were you thinking?," he asked suddenly.
"Nothing," l answered frowning.
He always managed to read my thoughts and it unnerved me.
"Your face says otherwise."
I looked up , the frown on my face deepening.
"Cheer up , Miss Jane," he added .
Is the man crazy!
How can he expect me to cheer up on a day like this.
"For centuries , funerals have always been places to grieve. I think sometimes we need to celebrate the life that person have lived."
I stared at him in confusion.
"You are one weird guy."
His smile deepened.
"I know."
"Were you coming to see me?"
"Yes Miss Jane . l wanted to..."
I smiled at his use of formality.
"Call me Jane, Ferracco . Miss Jane really," l chuckled .
A low laugh rumbled from his throat. A melodious laugh that rang sweetly in my ears.
What is happening to me?
"I will remember that. I wanted to inform you that l am leaving."
I felt disappointment settle over me.
"Don't! "
My stupid little mouth did it again . This is what l call betrayal by someone who belonged to you.
My mouth!
"What!," he asked clearly confused.
"What I mean is that you can stay for my parent's funeral if you like . We are not rushing you to leave," l quickly responded.
"Umm , won't others think l am intruding on a family event?," he asked me with a dark eyebrow cocked.
"No it's okay. You helped us a lot Ferracco. Besides l heard from Claudius that you live in Brasilia ."
"But ....," he opened his mouth to protest but l cut him off.
"Pliz stay. You told me to approach you if l am in need of anything remember and today l need all the support l could get including yours Ferracco. I know it sounds crazy . I don't know why, but it's nice having you around. Maybe it's just a feeling of desperation and helplessness l am having," l murmured with my voice barely above a whisper.
I said the last part more to myself. What the hell was l was babbling just now! He must be thinking that l am falling for him.
I looked down on the floor feeling heat slowly creeping into my cheeks giving them a pink shade. l was blushing in front of a man l barely knew.
Jane you're such an A-rated fool!
I slowly raised my eyes to his face and what l saw shocked me to my core. He was staring at me with those intense, bright blue eyes that were a color of an ocean. There was a wicked smirk playing across his face. A mixture of sensations rioted through me.
Did he just saw me blushing?
"Do you want me to help you decide what your feeling is ?Whether it's desperation ,helplessness or maybe.....," his voice trailed off.
With that he crossed the distance between us in one long stride and was now standing before me too close for comfort. Our faces were mere inches apart that any movement by one party our lips would collide .
I found my eyes swimming in the ocean of his blue eyes.
Look away Jane!
A voice echoed at the back of my head in warning but I couldn't move a limb.
My eyes were glued to his face as if by a spell. I swallowed , hardly able to collect my thoughts beneath the intensity of his gaze.
I was now sure that my face was the colour of a tomato with all the blushing. My heart was thumping and racing wildly inside my ribcage in anticipation.
Anticipation!
What a wicked mind I had!
I swallowed the bile rising in my throat. I could smell his aftershave which l am sure was made of a lemons. No one had managed to make me feel this way. Well l never had a boyfriend so l wouldn't know the feeling.
He raised his hand and pushed back a strand of my blond hair that was in my face.
"I am going to ask Claudius to lend me an appropriate attire. see you later."
He strode away leaving me with my jaw wide open. I couldn't believe this. One moment he was acting as if he was about to kiss me and the next moment he was speaking a different subject.
I felt a pang of disappointment.
Disappointment!
Now this was something else. What were you expecting from a stranger. I brushed aside my stupid thoughts and walked towards the kitchen.
I did not want to disgrace my parent's memory on this day. I felt bad. With the way things were right now l had no time for love, at least not now.
A/N:
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