Jaemin's mouth was dry from sighing so much, but as Renjun hurried past him, again carefully not sparing him a glance, he sighed again, deep and miserable. They usually spoke and joked and sometimes even flirted whenever they could when serving tables, but today? Not a peep.
It stung like hell.
In fairness, Jaemin should have seen it coming as Renjun had not spoken to him all week, and also because Jaemin did have a growing suspicion that Renjun thought he and Jeno had a thing going on. Which, as much as Jaemin resented to admit, was definitely not the case. Jaemin admitted that being the noble person he was, he would never only get together with one of them even he got the chance. Going out with only Renjun or Jeno felt so incomplete he'd almost rather they get together instead.
Watching Renjun smiling and putting plates of food down at a faraway table, Jaemin wondered how the hell he was meant to get Renjun to talk to him for long enough to convince him to meet Jeno after work.
Jeno was onto his second attempt to try and confess to Renjun. It was, yet again, Jaemin's idea, and yet again, up to Jaemin to make it sure it happens. God, the stress.
"Jeno? I think that Renjun thinks that we're dating."
Jeno turned bright red and started fiddling with the zip of the jacket he was wearing. "What? Why?"
"Well, along with ignoring you, he hasn't been talking to me either. And when you so kindly walked me to class, I saw Renjun look away when he saw us at the door. He must — Oh, he must be jealous. Remember when I told you how jealousy works? It's gone and backfired. It's the only plausible explanation."
Jeno wouldn't meet Jaemin's eye when he replied: "How do we... how do we fix it?"
Jaemin swallowed the lump in his throat at the word fix. It was just a mistake, the concept of him and Jeno dating. "I'd suggest you try to confess one more time."
"Oh, no."
"Oh, no indeed," muttered Jaemin as he glanced at his watch and realised he had a solid minute to catch Renjun before they were dismissed. He went into the hallway where Renjun had suffered his unpleasant encounter with that one fucker (who was now banned from the restaurant) and shook out his limbs, mumbling nonsensically about how he had to stop being so supportive.
He then saw Renjun stride quickly across the other side of the restaurant, like he was trying not to run, towards the staff exit. Jaemin's eyes widened and he scrambled after him, almost knocking over poor Dean, who had somehow maintained his patience with the newest workers throughout their career of careening into him. Jaemin whisper-shouted an apology and speed-walked after Renjun, who had now exited the building. He was probably going to take the goddamn bus. Jaemin thought back to the time he had blurted out that Renjun was bound to get hit on if he used it at this hour, and his entire face heated up in post-embarrassment. Well at least he got Renjun to agree to riding in his car on the way home. He just wished that they could have a little more time alone—
Jaemin watched in slow motion, in dim shock, as his own foot caught on the curb and careened forward into Renjun's back, sending them both toppling onto the ground. He landed with a thump and a grunt, just about administering that he had landed on cold, wet grass and that there was something leaning heavily on his chest, making it difficult for him to breathe. He laid there in shock for a few seconds, then opened his eyes to make sure he wasn't dead.
All he saw was an angel, so he thought in anguish that he really must be dead.
Extremely dark eyes stared into his in concern. They were dilated in shock, and the almost-golden hazel rings, framed with unfairly long eyelashes and nonblinking, were only convincing Jaemin he was either ascending to heaven or descending to hell, because no such beauty existed on earth, no pit as deep as these that he could fall into.
"J—Jaemin? Did you chase me out here to fall on me?"
"I'm dead," was his only reply. "I can't even breathe; I'm dead." Renjun gasped in alarm and removed his arms from Jaemin's chest so that his hands rested beside Jaemin's head, holding him up a little more so that there was an inch or two of space between their faces.
Unfortunately, now that Jaemin had the opportunity to figure out that this "angel" was actually Huang Renjun, his inner thought spiralled into a frenzied mantra of get the fuck up! But Jaemin didn't really care. He had apparently hit his head hard. Some part of him still saw an angel, be it Huang Renjun or not; and he didn't know what you were supposed to do when you saw one, but he wanted to kiss it. That was his first response to everything cute, in fairness.
Renjun regarded him curiously. Jaemin saw the tips of his dark brown hair brush his lashes when he blinked, saw his lips still looking soft and pink despite the dry air, saw his nose and cheeks gradually redden for some reason. Jaemin wanted to squeeze the life out of him, but he couldn't really do that right then, so he just settled on leaning up slowly and pressing his own mouth against Renjun's.
After a second, the other boy seemed to realise what was going on. Renjun wheezed in shock and rolled off Jaemin, who's mind cleared effective immediately. Oh, fuck, thought Jaemin as he jumped up, still slightly dizzy from the fall. I've gone and done it again.
He helped Renjun up, who was completely and absolutely flustered. "S—sorry about that!"
Renjun lightly brushed a finger over his burning face, over the lips that Jaemin now knew were even softer than they looked, and Jaemin winced. He must be grossed the fuck out.
Jaemin felt the urgent need to bow in apology. "You— I—" Jaemin moved his hands hysterically, trying to think of something. He remembered Renjun's pretty eyes, the colour of which reminded him a bit of—
"You reminded me of my dog, and I always kiss my dog on the nose, so I just kissed you instead!" Oh, god. I'm so fucking stupid.
Renjun snorted, and Jaemin wanted to jump and keel over at the same time. "Your dog? I looked like your dog?"
Jaemin found himself nodding. "You, I don't know, you kind of have the same colour eyes? I hit my head, okay?"
Renjun nodded slowly, fighting to keep a smile off his face, which was completely pink. "Any reason you decided to run me down here?"
Jaemin sighed inwardly. He wanted to ask Renjun to forgive him, about if it was true that I was dating Jeno, would you join in? but he bit that back. "Jeno asked me to tell you that he needed to talk to you after work. It sounded urgent, Renjun."
Renjun gnawed on his lip for a second, and Jaemin took some time to calm himself down. "I—" Renjun's hands entwined nervously with each other, playing with his own fingers, buying himself more time. Dumbly, Jaemin thought maybe it would work better if he played with Jaemin's hands instead. Then maybe they'd both be a bit happier.
"I owe him that much, don't I?" Renjun's stature drooped in defeat, and Jaemin let out a sigh of relief.
"Hell yeah, you do." And maybe you owe me something too, but that doesn't matter.
Renjun looked slightly startled at his response, and Jaemin realised how angry he must have sounded when really he was just relieved for Jeno. Jaemin skittered forward and lifted his hands, wanting to comfort Renjun in any way, let him know in a way other than words that it was okay. But putting them on his shoulders wasn't enough, and hugging him was over the top.
But Jaemin was over the top, too. He wrapped his arms around Renjun's abdomen and rested his head on his shoulder. It was sudden as hell, but Renjun returned it for some reason without a moment's hesitation. Jaemin closed his eyes and relished in it for as long as he could, because if Jeno's confession went right he'd never be able to hold either of them like this ever again.
But he had to come back to reality, because he knew that he had to tell Renjun the truth before he left to see Jeno. "You know that him and I aren't together, right?"
After he whispered it against the shell of Renjun's ear, he should have pulled away. That was all he should have said, but his head was fuzzy again —
"I don't think I'd be able to do that without you anyway, Renjun."
Renjun's grip on him went loose, and Jaemin stumbled back, not believing what he'd done. "Jeno said — he said he's waiting at Timeless, you can go now, he's there — bye!"
And before Renjun could get a word in, Jaemin was off in the opposite direction, his usually springy legs sluggish, his head foggy, and his heart a mess.
***
no one told you life was gonna be this waaaaaaay