I can still remember the feeling I had. I kept my eyes focused on the ground during the walk to the van that was waiting for us right outside the house. I wanted to turn around to look at him again, one last time before I left but I couldn’t and I hated myself for that.
Louis, as always, walked to the front seat but stopped right before he got in. He turned around and gave me a pity look that I disliked because it made me feel pathetic, “You take it. You need it more than I do,” he told me. He was the only one from all of them who knew the way I felt or so I thought.
I put my sunglasses on so no one could see what my face looked like. I felt so stupid and immature about my reaction. Why was I so sad? When did I become an adolescent girl? I hated my guts during the whole ride. If I were alone, I would have cried like a baby but luckily, I wasn’t.
The guys were talking with Manuel about random stuff but I seriously couldn’t have cared less about any of it. I suddenly felt Louis’ hand squeezing my shoulder from behind my seat. Louis was the kind of person who never showed physical affection so I was shocked. It was very weird but that hand on my shoulder meant the world to me. He understood what I was going through and that was his way of telling me he was there for me.
I stared at the empty road ahead of us and it reminded me of how empty my life was back in the UK. I had a family, yes. I had lots of friends too but everyone else had someone special to think of. All of my friends were dating someone, all the time, but I was always alone. Not just because of the fact that it was hard to maintain a relationship having that “celebrity” status I hated so much. There were many other reasons why I’ve never jumped on the relationship train and one of them was my long and boring obsession with Louis, which was luckily gone already. But the main reason was that I’ve never actually found anyone who interested me as I wanted them to. That changed after my visit to Argentina.
I kept picturing the look on Niall’s face when we said goodbye to each other. His bright eyes were so off. His beautiful smile had faded away. I could feel how sad he was and that killed me. I still wasn’t sure of what it really was what he felt about me but I couldn’t stop remembering the words Hannah said. He is crazy about you. I thought I deserved a chance to find that out on my own but yet, I was still there. Leaving. Running away. Was it better to leave all that behind? To leave him with a good first impression? That could have been the best thing to do because I was afraid that if he got to know me better, he’d change his mind about me.
I just stayed in silence, swallowing my thoughts and repressing the urge I felt to jump out of that ride to run back to his house. I was used to hide my emotions. I was used to put up with that bubbly image people had of me. But sometimes all I needed was to be real. All I wanted was someone to love me as much as I thought I deserved to be loved. I didn’t want to smile all the time anymore. I didn’t want people to think I was jumping from one model’s bed to another because that was so far from whom I really was. I wanted someone to get to know me at my best and at my worst. I wanted to have the right to have flaws and I knew that wouldn’t happen back in the place where I was heading to.
“We are here,” Manuel stopped the car and turned around to look at me, “Are you okay, Harry?”
“Yeah. I’m fine,” I lied, “Why did you ask?” I questioned when we were left alone inside the car.
“No reason. You just seem different from yesterday,” he stared at me with an intense glare, “Looks like something had changed inside you,” he added and then he left the van. Was it really that obvious? How could a guy who didn’t even know me notice that there was something wrong going on with me?
That was the first time I realized there was something more about Manuel. He wasn’t just the tough bodyguard he seemed to be. He’d become something way more important for Niall and me in the future.
I walked to the plane and turned around before I boarded it. I took a long breath of air to clean my lungs because that was supposed to be the last time I breathed the same air Niall was breathing. I was exaggerating and being pathetic but I needed it so I guess it was fine.
“Hello there,” Lucia greeted me as I entered the plane and I just waved in response. That jet didn’t look half as awesome as it did the day before, “Here are your iPads,” she said, “You already know how this works so there’s no need for me to repeat it. Just call me if you need anything, I’ll be right there.”
I picked a seat and Louis followed me right away, “I need to be alone,” I told him, trying to sound as nice as I could.
“No, you don’t,” he fastened his seatbelt right next to me, “Maria!” he called the flight attendant, “We’d like a drink.”
“Sure,” she smiled, “What can I get you?”
“Surprise us.”
“Okay,” she took a moment to think, “How about one of the best Argentinians wines there are? We got a box of bottles yesterday because the ministers are travelling tomorrow but I can open one for you.”
“Whatever. Just make it fast,” Louis spat and I rolled my eyes to him.
“Can you not be that rude to her?”
“She called me gay.”
I couldn’t believe everything was going back to the usual again. It just made me feel even worst to know that I was heading back to the same thing. I needed a change. I needed a break from that life. It’s not that I hated what I was doing but sometimes, it became just too much to handle and I wanted normal. For the first time in my life, I needed to be normal. I needed to be just a random guy who met a random boy to fall in love with. No press. No politics. No age issues involved. Just normal. Was it that hard?
“Hey, I’d like a glass of that too,” Liam called from behind.
“Why are we taking so long to takeoff?” Zayn’s insistence to leave was starting to piss me off.
“There’s a lot of traffic in the skies today,” Lucia laughed, “We should be starting to move in ten minutes. Sorry about the wait.”
“Do you wanna talk?” Louis turned to me, “I’m bored.”
“I’d rather stay in silence,” I answered without turning around to look at him, “Sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize, Harold. You are sad. I get it.”
“Isn’t it stupid though?” I looked at him. It had been a while since the last serious conversation we shared.
“It’s not stupid. Why would it be?”
“I met him one day ago. I don’t even know who he really is and yet I’m here feeling like trash. It feels stupid to me.”
“It’s not Niall the reason why you are sad, Harry.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, a bit offended.
“You are sad about yourself. That’s the worst kind of sad but I understand you. It happens to me sometimes too,” he looked so serious and it was really weird coming from him. His sentence left me thinking for a while because he was probably right, “What are you thinking?”
“I need a break,” I sighed.
“We all need a break,” he poured some more wine on my glass, “We are going to have one now. Just try not to drown in your sorrow. Things happen for a reason, you know?”
“You mean me meeting Niall or us leaving this place?”
“Us leaving. How could that work? I mean you and this kid. It’s beyond complicated, barely legal even.”
“I don’t want this,” I grabbed the headphones from my pockets, decided to go back to silence.
“This conversation?” I didn’t answer, “What do you want me to say then?”
“I want you to stay quiet,” I tried to put the headphones on but he stopped me, “What do you want, Louis?”
“I’m not going to tell you to pursue this, Harry. There’s obviously not reasoning going on inside of your brain right now. You need someone to point out the facts and this is me trying to do so.”
“Well, maybe I don’t need reasoning right now,” I rolled my eyes, “I’m always reasoning. I’m always doing what I’m supposed to do but this time, I don’t want to.”
“It’s dangerous,” he raised his voice and I shushed him, “Sorry but I’m afraid of what might happen if you continue this.”
“How am I continuing this? Don’t you see I’m leaving?”
“I know you got his number. I saw you looking at it a while ago,” I turned to the window and I saw Manuel still standing there. He was talking to the phone and I wondered what was he waiting for, “Whatever you decide to do with that number, just be careful.”
“I will be careful,” I said just to put an end to that pointless discussion.
“I’m not sure if you want me to encourage this or if I have to talk you out of it. I really don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” he took a pause, “But I’m here for you. Whatever you decide to do, I’ll support you and I’ll stand by your side, even if I have to be the one who tells you ‘I told you so’ at the end of it.”
“Whatever. Thank you,” I rolled my eyes and went back to self-pitying myself.
“Seriously! What is going on?” Liam was the one to interrupt the silence this time, “Lucia, why aren’t we moving yet?”
“I’m so sorry about it, guys,” she seemed ashamed, “I’ll check what’s wrong right now.”
It seemed as if, somehow, destiny didn’t want me to leave. Or at least that’s what I wanted it to be. I wanted Lucia to come back from the cabin to tell us that something went wrong with the plane and that we were not going to be able to takeoff. I wanted one more day in Argentina even if that would have meant having to hear Zayn complain for hours. Without even noticing, I was starting to get excited about the idea.
“We are ready now,” Lucia came back to us, “We just got permission to move. Fasten your seatbelts because we are starting the flight,” she held her words for a few seconds, “Right now,” she said when the plane started to move.
I closed my eyes to digest that piece of information and I clutched my hands to my seat. It was happening. “Goodbye, Argentina!” Liam, childishly, yelled from his seat.
I looked through the window one more time and I saw Manuel still standing there right next to the car. He was staring at the plane and his frame became smaller and smaller as we moved. I took my phone and picked the saddest playlist I had because I wanted to drown in my sorrow, just like Louis asked me not to.
Lucia walked to us one more time, checking if everything was ready for the takeoff, “Is that on Airplane mode?” she asked me and I nodded, “Good. We are ready then.”
“Harry, did you text Olivia?”
“No, I forgot.”
“I did,” Louis answered, “We have a meeting with her tomorrow morning.”
“Nope. No way. I’m not even going,” Liam said.
“Me neither,” Zayn added, “None of us should go.”
“Can you all shut up already? Stop acting like little kids and start taking your job seriously, for once,” I spat and I have no idea where that came from. Silence took over the plane and I enjoyed it more than ever.
“Wow,” Louis whispered. His eyes were wide open and he couldn’t stop staring at me.
“What do you want?”
“Nothing, mate,” he frowned, “Maria! Is it too late to change seats?”
“You can do it if you want to,” Lucia replied as she walked to us again, “Harry, I almost forgot.”
“Don’t talk to him now. He’ll bite you.”
Lucia ignored Louis and grabbed something from the overhead compartment, “Here it is,” she said as she handled me a bag of something.
“What is this?”
“Niall sent it to you. A bag of oranges,” she frowned, “Don’t you have oranges in London?”
“We do,” Louis gave her a look to make her walk away, “What is this?” he asked me but I was too lost on my own thoughts.
I couldn’t believe how cute that was. He remembered what I said that morning and that whole thing was just making everything much harder. I wanted to jump out and go kiss the hell out of that boy. I opened the bag and there was a folded paper inside. Before I checked it, I looked around to see Louis trying to peek from across the aisle.
“What you looking at?” I asked him and I silently laughed at his reaction. My mood was definitely better than before but I still enjoyed how he seemed to be scared of me. I opened the paper to find the sweetest note ever. I still keep it on my wallet and I stare at it every once in a while.
Just in case you need to buy a new mic. Niall. How could that boy be so damn sweet? My face hurt from how wide I was smiling. His handwriting was so cute and he even added a smiley face to it. I wanted to text him right there but I remembered my phone was on Airplane mode already.
“What are you doing?” Zayn, suddenly, jumped to the empty seat next to me.
“What? You scared me. What are you doing here?”
“No. What are you doing here?” he raised an eyebrow.
“What do you mean?” I was beyond confused.
“What do you want with him, Abdul? Leave him alone,” Louis joined the conversation.
“Shut up, Kurt Hummel,” Zayn shot back and I couldn’t believe his nickname choice. It was perfect.
“What the hell?” I knew Louis wouldn’t know who that was.
“Google it,” Zayn looked at him, “Now leave us alone.”
He turned to me and I was still not sure of what he wanted, “I’m lost, Z.”
“Why are you leaving then? We all know you want to stay.”
What did he know? “I’m not sure I’m following you,” I stuttered.
“You like that boy and he obviously likes you back,” Zayn was always practical, things weren’t complicated for him. That’s the thing I liked the most about his personality. He didn’t understand how the rest of the boys and me used to spend hours trying to please other people with our actions. If he didn’t want something, he’d just say it and go with his flow. “Why are you leaving?” he insisted.
“Zayn! What the hell?” Louis intruded the conversation again. It was impossible for him to mind his own bussines.
“We were talking the other day about how you never liked anyone else besides Ellen DeGeneres here,” he pointed to Louis, “And I’ve never seen you like this regarding anyone. You shouldn’t leave, mate.”
“Hey, what are you even saying?” Louis freaked out, “And why are you being so rude to me today?”
“But,” I took a minute to digest what was happening, “It’s wrong, isn’t it?”
“Why would it be wrong?”
“He is sixteen.”
“So what? We were sixteen not so long ago. Don’t you remember how that felt like? He is not a kid anymore.”
The plane was still moving at a slow pace but my mind was flying so fast. I can still remember the rush I felt.
“Go for it, mate,” Zayn said, “At least go see what it really is about. Otherwise you might end up regretting it forever.”
“Lucia,” I yelled out of nowhere, “Stop the plane!”
“What?” Liam yelled from his seat, “What’s happening?”
“Hey!” Louis stood up, “This is wrong. What are you doing?”
“I’m staying.”
“What?”
“I’m staying,” I grabbed my stuff, “I don’t wanna go back to London,” I said as the plane stopped and I rushed my way to the front door.
“He can’t stay here by himself. Louis, stay with him.”
“What? I’m not staying with him. Zayn is the one to blame for this so he should stay.”
“I’m not staying,” Zayn crossed his arms.
“Nobody has to stay. I’m a grown up,” I rolled my eyes to them. Lucia was struggling to open the gate and that only made my anxiety grow bigger.
“Seriously, Louis. Stay with him.”
I walked to Zayn and hugged him tight, “Thank you,” I whispered to him and then hugged Liam.
“Are you sure about this, mate?”
“I’ve never been so sure about anything in my whole life,” I answered proudly.
“Whatever,” Louis yelled, “I’m staying with you,” he said as he took his backpack, “You are going to pay for this, Abdul!”
“Have fun,” he teased him, “And do not cockblock him,” he whispered to his ears but I could hear it.
“Why am I not getting any of this?” Liam looked confused, “Are you sure you are staying, Louis?”
“Yeah. Whatever,” he sighed before he added a last sentence.
I stared at Lucia finishing her task right in front of me and, as soon as the gate opened, the sunlight blinded me for a few seconds. When I recovered my sight, I saw Manuel standing right outside, next to the plane. Somehow, it looked like he was waiting for that to happen at some point.
“We are all going to hell anyways.”
That been said, I was back in the game.
THE PRESIDENT’S SON
[Hi there! I was just wondering. Who's your favorite character so far? Let me know!. Thanks for reading. Seb.]