Raegan's POV- 3 Months later
The warm body beside me started to stir causing me to come out of my peaceful sleep. I didn't want to open my eyes, so I kept them tightly shut. I wasn't ready to get up or move from this nice and comfortable bed I've grown accustom to sleeping in more than the bed back in my dorm. I've avoided my dorm as much as I could since I walked out of the record release party I was attending with Ashton because I knew that would be one of the first places he'd look for me at. I couldn't face him even if I wanted too because after hearing the many voicemails he had left, I knew I had really hurt him. So, since then I've avoided him. It was for the best, or at least that's what I kept telling myself. I didn't want to be used for publicity anymore.
Ever since that I got in the car with Blake and went back to his house, I've practically never left except for the few nights I stayed at my parents. No one knew about me staying at Blakes, not Hailey, and not even his parent's. It was a secret between him and I. One good thing about Blake, he was proving to be a really good distraction after all.
"Rae," Blake whispered dropping soft kisses on my bare shoulder. "You'll be late for class if you don't wake up." He slid is arm around my middle pinning me tightly against his hot body.
I groaned as I freed myself from his grasp. "Today is the day isn't it? We find out if we made it into the medical program or not."
Blake nodded and I could sense he didn't seem too excited about it. As I got to know him, I knew he had a lot ridding on this decision. He was anxious and I was too, to an extent.
"According to my mother, that email should arrive sometime this afternoon. I tried to get her to tell me my fate ahead of time but she wouldn't. She treats me just like any other student. It's both a blessing and curse." He said as I rolled off the bed. He brought himself to laying on his side, resting his head on his propped up hand as he watched me move about his room, gathering my clothes that he thrown off the previous night. A smirk creeped along his lips. "Will you be back tonight?"
I shrugged after pulling my winkled shirt over my head. "I should probably start staying at the dorm again. Hailey is really starting to get suspicious. She's not buying me staying at my parent's house. Plus we've been doing this for three months." I shimmied my jeans onto my hips causing me to slightly lose my balance. "Flings usually don't last this long."
"Is that's what we are?" He continued smirking. "Here I've been telling everyone you're my girl."
My eyes widen with surprise because that wasn't a part of the little agreement we had. The last thing I needed was word getting to Hailey because she wanted Blake and even after all these months of him and I hooking up, she was still trying.
"I---" I stuttered.
"I'm just joking." He added quickly as I started to panic and a wave of relief washed over me. Thank god.
"You had me worried." I said as I began to smile. I crossed the room back to his bed to where he continued to lay, watching me. I kneeled on the bed, giving him a quick and gentle kiss before heading towards the door. "I'll talk to you later."
"Raegan, wait!" He said, catching me before I passed through the door. I turned to see him making his way towards me, dragging the sheet behind him to keep his lower half covered. "There's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?" I asked curiously. His brow furrowed as he looked a mixture of unsure and confused as to what he had to say.
"I was wondering your thoughts on us possibly becoming more than this so called fling?" His voice cracked as he asked and I felt my stomach knot up. "You don't have to tell me them now because I want you to think about it. We can talk tonight after dinner if you decide to come back."
I didn't know what else to do, so I smiled and took a step closer to him. I slid my hand behind his head, feeling his short, soft, dark curls intertwined in my fingers as I pulled him down to my lips. I had no verbal words to respond because I wasn't sure what to say. I was unsure of how I felt when it came to Blake because as messed up as it sounds I've been using him to suppress my feelings towards another person. Has it worked? Yes. Mostly anyways.
He smiled as I released him from grasp. I backed out of his room leaving him standing there holding his bed sheet around himself.
I walked to the nearest bus stop, which wasn't too far away. I checked the time after waiting only to realize the bus to take me back in the direction of the school had already come. I groaned as I stood there feeling stupid, weighing the options I had. Regardless of what I chose I would be late to class, whether it be walking back to Blake's and have him take me, waiting for the next bus to come that goes that way, or even getting an Uber. Either way, making it to class just wasn't happening today.
I stood there thinking on what to do next and that's when it hit me. I opened the map on my phone and looked for the particular location I had been thinking about a lot here recently. It didn't take long for me to find it on the map and that's when I made the decision I was going to return to the beach. Not just any beach, though. The beach I nearly died at. The beach where Ashton rescued me. I couldn't began to tell as to why I wanted to go or why just here recently it's been heavy on my mind go back but since I wasn't too far from it now, today seemed to be a good day to.
Once Uber picked me up, I was being dropped of ten minutes later on the edge of the road just feet away from the short trail, leading to the sandy beach and crystal like water. The weather was wonderful, not too warm but also not cold. It was almost the definition of perfect November weather.
I observed my surroundings as I made my way down the rough trail. It just as I remember it because I nearly fell going down it the first as I followed Hailey but luckily I made it down with ease until I became face to face with the water. The same water that rolled me beneath its waves multiple times. Other than a few sunbathers, the beach was empty. I wished I was alone.
All I could do was stand there and watch the waves crash out in the distance. It brought back all the memories of the first time I came here. The feeling I had was strange because I felt so many different thing. The feeling I could recognize from the mixture I had within me was anger. I was angry at the water for choosing me to suck into its depths, swallowing me, and its unsuccessful attempts to suffocate me. I wish I could punch it, to hurt it like it did me.
Tears started forming and falling to my cheeks as I wished to scream out at the watery world in from of me and let it know how much I hated it but I didn't want to scare the others in my company and be looked at weird. So I just stood there in silence. If I hadn't went into the water that day, everything would have ended so different. I wish I could say I regretted it because it would make everything much easier, but I was raise to accept what happens in life and make the best of it. The good and the bad.
My attention was torn away from the battle in my head to my buzzing phone in my back pocket. I pulled it out and stared at the name displaying on my screen.
Ashton Irwin
Out of all the hours of the day and days he could have once again called me, he picked right now at this very moment as I stood where he came into my life. So, naturally given the moment and how I was feeling, I answered his call.
"Hello?" I answered followed by a moment of silence.
"You answered." The familiar voice finally responded with shock. "I didn't think you would."
"Right now seemed like a really good moment too considering the circumstance. I'm standing where you saved me." I said softly. It was honestly good to hear his voice again because although I wouldn't admit it, I missed him.
"You're at the beach? Why?" I figured he would immediately jump into the topic as to why I left that night but he didn't.
"I honestly have no idea." I said with a small laugh. "I've just been thinking about this place a lot lately."
"Are you doing okay?" He asked, his tone was soft and I could tell he was being careful with his words. "I've been worried. I really just called to see if you were alright."
"I'm okay." I said halfheartedly, wishing I could be more convincing. Maybe he'll buy it anyways.
"We're touring in Europe right, just landed in Paris to be precise. It's really good to hear your voice again and knowing you're okay." I could hear his smile in his more peppy tone now. "The show is here in a bit."
"That sounds exciting. I should be receiving an email letting me know if I got into Med school any minute now, seeing it's now passed noon. Wish me luck on that and I wish you luck on your show?"
"You got in. I know you did. Oh and Raegan? I'll beat myself up if I don't say anything while I have the chance, but I miss you."
Before I got the chance to respond, the line went dead. Ashton had hung up.
A/N: Hope y'all enjoyed reading this chapter. Spent most of the day slowly working on this. If ya like, please show your support by tapping the vote button.