I sat on the couch, and it felt good to be back in the familiar surroundings of my house. The couch smelled like home, and everything just looked right. I didn't know how much I missed this place until I was at the door step at three in the morning, with the door locked. My Mom with sleepy eyes answered the door in her house coat, the paparazzi no where in sight- they are cleared out by nine. She looked surprised to see me.
"Addie? Addie honey?" She blinked, but before I could give her enough warning I forced myself into her unexpected arms, immediately they caved in around me. "Oh baby, what's wrong?" I couldn't answer, I was too busy swallowing back tears and breathing in her beautiful, mother like that no one else in the world could ever smell like. It was the perfect blend of baking over the years, and a combination of Love Spell, Sunflowers and Obsession. I wrapped my arms around her, and help on for dear life, never wanting her to let me go.
With her Mother-like intuition, it was like she could tell I really needed this and didn't rush the hug. She rocked me from side to side as I cried, until she pulled away slowly to look at me.
"My poor Addie... what in the world happened?" She asked, in her sweet Mother-like voice, and I was just realizing how dearly I missed her. I was breathing in hoarse breaths as she guided me to the table to sit down.
"I-I." I took a deep breath. "I broke up with him... I had to." I cried and my Mom looked at me incredulously. "I couldn't handle it, I missed being home. I missed seeing you every day, and helping out around the house. I couldn't handle being on TV, and being in the spot light. I couldn't and I can't. Please, please don't make me go back." I begged, even though in the back of my mind all I knew that could help me cure this heart wrenching feeling was the feel of Bane's arms around me. But he was states away, and probably couldn't stand the thought of me.
"You just left?" My Mom asked, and I bit my lip and nodded. "Oh... Okay." She nodded. "I would never force you to go back there, to be honest I didn't like the people outside all the time anyway." She laughed humorlessly, but suddenly there was a thunder coming from the stairs.
Immediately my father, Alex and Jace were in the dinning room in nothing but boxers, baggy t-shirts and overly large boots. They only looked appropriate on my Father, but if it was any other circumstance I would have laughed.
"Alright, where is that little pansy boy? I told him, I TOLD HIM how many acres we owned and how we wouldn't hesitate!" My Dad said, his face getting redder with each world as he left the dinning room to go to the living room for the gun rack that was placed in there. I shot my Mom a terrified look, knowing my Dad really wouldn't hesitate to kill someone for me and she jumped up even in her sleepy stooper and rushed after him. My brothers looked just as dangerous.
"What happened?" Jace demanded and I frowned. "What did he mess up?!"
"Nothing..." I whispered. "I messed it up." I sunk lower into my seat, and both my brothers looked at me sadly. "I just missed this all too much to stay there." I answered the unspoken question and my brothers nodded, giving my sympathetic looks.
That was the first night here, and I was now on my seventh. By tomorrow I will have missed my own wedding date. I refused to turn the TV on, the fear of being on it was too much for me to even bother to find something on. My family wouldn't let me help out around the ranch because they claimed I looked too sad to. If I knew that was the way to sleep in the days I wanted to while growing up I would have claimed to be depressed.
I missed Bane more than I thought possible. What hurt more was thinking that it was my fault this space was between us. I wished now that I had thought through this more. Why did I just run out like that?
I knew the answer, and it was a good one. It was overwhelming to be apart of his life. I loved being apart of it, but I couldn't handle being in the lime light. I didn't want my family to be dragged into this as well.
I never thought I would be willing to be with Bane, but at the moment I was fighting the urge to jump back on a plane and see him. I wanted to see him again... I needed to. There was something about the fact I hadn't seen him in a week that made me heart ache. Missing him hurt more than I thought possible, as I spent my days sitting on this warn couch staring at the old wallpapered walls thinking about him.
It was pathetic how badly I wanted to see him now, it was so bad that for the first time all week I was willing to actually more to get to the remote. I turned the TV on, but was greeted with FOX, a news channel that wouldn't spout garbage about my relationship with Bane.
I flicked through the channels at a leisurely pace, and my Mom stood in the doorway, surprised that I had turned the TV on. She was getting used to me wanting nothing to do with TV.
The first night of my return here, she went to turn my TV on so I wouldn't have to sit in the dark because with a Mothers instinct she just knew I was no where near tired. Immediately though, I demanded she shut it off, at that time darkness was better than having to see him. At the time I was hoping the anger that I held toward him would stay but it was false emotions.
I was the one who messed this up, and now the whole world knows who I am for no reason. Tomorrow I wont be marrying Bane, which is the only reason anyone even knows my name.
Lindsay and Hillary had stopped by, telling me I did the right thing even if they probably didn't believe it. It was good to hear it out loud though, I was thankful they still had my back. They got the cell phones, and I had mine but I told them not to use them. When I figured out what I was going to do, I would probably end up shipping them back to him. It didn't feel right having them.
I had a hope that Bane would text me, or anything but he never did.
Still flipping through the channels, my brothers burst through the front door and Alex yanked the remote from my hand like they were missing a football gave even though that would never happened and sent it to thirty-eight (MTV).
"Guys." I began to complain but Jace silenced me with his hand.
"No! You WANT to see this!" He said, and my eyes zeroed in on the TV.
Oh My God...
Someone knocked on my door.
BANES POV!!!!!!!
I was backstage at the Oprah Winfrey show, about to go on and tell them the wedding was off and wouldn't be happening. Hopefully they wouldn't ask anymore questions, because I didn't know how to answer them.
I could, but I couldn't guarantee that I wouldn't freak out and start yelling how it's everyone's fault that she left me. It was everyone's fault for caring, and never leaving me alone. They drove us apart... and if this didn't change I was more than willing to drop this. Drop everything to be with her. I would stop acting, not live in LA, move to Kansas, share a room with her in her parents house if it meant she would be happy.
The week was spent by making preparations if she randomly came home. I remembered the night we sat on the beach, and she told me that she missed the stars. I promised her then that I would bring her the stars, and now I was planning to.
I wanted to get an actual projector, that shot the ceiling and changed with the night sky. When constellations could actually be seen, she would be able to see them in here. I did some researched and discovered how much the cost, and though money meant nothing to me, I knew Addie wouldn't like it if I spent that much money on her. So I did something I knew would make her happy. I, myself, went to the store and purchased black paint and painted the ceiling. While at the store I spent thirty dollars on different colored, shapes, sized stars and planets. It wasn't as elaborate as I hoped, but I stuck them up on the ceiling and let some of them down on the walls... like some how they were falling. My parents were surprised I had put this much time into something myself, but I ignored them. Unwilling to talk to anyone.
It didn't seems to be enough. I found lamps that had moving lamp shades that had stars cut out... sending little stars moving through the room. With all the lights off, with just that I was finally pleased with it.
I wished more than anything that she would come home. I prayed, for the first since I could remember, that she would come home and climb into the bed that I moved into the middle of the room, dead center and got all the furniture out but the bed and spent my sleepless nights trying to find constellations to show Addie when she finally came home.
My parents were obvious worried but didn't say anything.
I spent my sleepless nights fantasizing about Addie. Playing little scenes in my head, like her bursting through the door to the bedroom we once shared and noticing everything I did just for her and jumping in the bed and letting me hold her ... for the rest of my life.
All I wanted was to hold her, but at the moment I was sitting in the dressing room waiting for Oprah to tell the audience I was here. I was thinking about how the fans were going to take the fact that we weren't together anymore. I don't think I could handle if one of them took it well. It wasn't fair, the only thing I wanted was her... and I didn't have her. Money couldn't buy her love.
My Mom walked in with an unpleasant look on her face as she saw how the make up people did a horrible job at hiding the bags under my eyes and how they tried to add color to my face. It didn't work... I still looked like hell.
"Can you stop looking so down? You're going to go out there, cancel the wedding like it was all your idea, because your fans mean the world to you and they didn't seem pleased and... I can get you another wife. Everything is going to be fine." I stared incredulously at my Mothers words. "Don't look at me like that, this was all a publicity stunt, it isn't my fault she couldn't handle the fame. My incredulous stare turned dangerous.
"You told them about her?" I asked and my Mom rolled her eyes.
"of course I did. I was hoping to get more money out of the wedding and because the contract was already signed they still owe us the money!" She rejoiced and I jumped up about to yell when my name was called to get on stage. If I could hit a girl I would have, but I just shook my head and exited the room without a word which made more of an impact.
I went on stage, listening to the screams and clapping of my fans. They seemed oblivious to my emotions... Addie would have comforted me she would have known what to do.
I answered all of Oprah's questions, without realizing the time passing by until Addie was brought up.
"So, where is your arm candy?" Oprah's pleasant voice broke through my wondering ravine and I frowned and she took off on my facial expressions. "Everything is okay with you two right?" She questioned and I looked down.
"I..." I couldn't speak and I didn't understand what was happening. I was about to cry. I felt my eyes start to water as my heart was retched to the side painfully as I realized it wasn't my fans fault Addie left me... it was my Mother's. I could see her from the side of the stage, unseen by everyone but me. I shook my head again wordlessly.
"Bane? Hun?" Oprah asked, like a caring Mother would, and I wished I could have.
I took a deep breath and the audience was dead silent. "I don't know what I'm doing here. The girl of my dreams flew home on a plane last week because she couldn't handle the fame. Couldn't handle being on TV and being in the news and being known by millions of people. If she actually came here and had to come out on stage she probably would have fainted. She..." I sighed, feeling the tears coming on stronger but didn't let them come out. "She's perfect, and for a week I've thought it's the medias fault I'll never see her again but I just realized it isn't their fault and it isn't yours... it's my Mothers. She sold the identity to the woman that I love to a network!" I stood up, and a camera zoomed in on my face. "Addie? Baby? Hopefully you're watching this. I'm on way, I'm going to get you back!" and with that I ran off the stage.
ADDIES POV!!!
My Mom answered the door as I watched Bane run off the stage and the look on Oprah's face as he did and my Mom gasped as the man at the door stepped in. I wasn't prepared to see who would be there but I wasn't surprised to see Bane looking like he was out of breath, his face red and blotchy and his hair windblown.
For moments we just like this in silence.
I hope you like it!!
only a couple more parts left!
comments please!