It's been a year since that day...I remember it so vividly...like its an image burned into my skull buzzing to be remembered, it's been a year since the first of December, me and my now 17 year old sister Ahro where in the living room helping our mom put up the Christmas tree since she was ill and on bed rest when we herd a knocking on our door so loud and vivid. I told Ahro to keep decorating the tree and that I would get the door, I remember when i answered the door and I saw my now Boyfriend Suga standing there with the rest of BTS...I was in complete shock.
I remember so vividly what Suga said to...Suga had said to me " Hey Rachel", that's my name I'm Rachel Smith and I'm now 21 in Korean time anyway...I remember saying to Suga " hi...can I help you", what he said to me then sent chills down my back Suga said to me, " yeah me and BTS are staying with you this whole month of December which means you get to spend Christmas and New Years with BTS", me and Ahro where so excited that we let them stay...I mean we had the room after all it was just me, Ahro, and our mother Emily Smith at the time in the house mine and Ahro's father had been dead for several years now.
I remember how the whole month had been full of excitement me and my sister Danced with the members and we got to know each of them more, then I remember New Years eve...how could I forget it.... Ahro stayed home to help care for mother and BTS took me out to the club stereo 21 at the mall where we drank and partied...that night Suga had spilled his feelings out for me and that night one of my many dreams came true...we where happy...until the final day when they had to leave.
It was then I saw the change in Suga...he was so harsh to me and he told me to leave him the hell alone...so I did...I sat in the mall crying trying to figure out where I went wrong at until it was time to meet the boys to say goodbye...I cant forget that moment either...Suga had felt bad and he asked me to forgive him and please come with him...of course with me being me I forgave him...I said my goodbyes to my mom and sister that same night...my mom was in no shape to travel and my sister didn't want to leave her.
Then I moved here to Seoul, South Korea thinking everything would be amazing but its the exact opposite...but I've learned to live with it...my thoughts where broken by a familure calming voice echoing behind me as I stood on the balcony taking in the warm air, " oh there you are Rachel...I was wondering where you where", I turn only to be faced with Jungkook himself and I cant help but smile and say " hey Jungkook...I didn't know you where looking for me", he answered " yeah I was wondering where you went I wanted to see if you where okay", his smile dropped fast.
" I herd you and Suga arguing last night again...", my throat dropped as soon as he brought up mine and Suga's fight last night, " yeah that...I'm okay Jungkook thank you for the concern", Jungkook's smile changed to a smug look and he spoke with a tinge of annoyance in his voice, " why do you put up with him when he treats you like that Rachel?...it's not right if your mom and sister herd how he treats you and how you put up with him like that they would be heart broken so why do you do it", I sigh he always does this whenever me and Suga fight Jungkook fills in my mothers place all the time.
" because I love him Jungkook and please keep them out of this my mother is sick as it is and my sister is exhausted beyond explanation they do not need this...im a big girl Jungkook I told my mother and my sister I'm doing great and so are me and Suga and I'm keeping it at that...its time to prove to them...that I can take care of myself", Jungkook let out a huff of annoyance, " Rachel who are you trying to fool...your not okay Rachel...this relationship is killing you in more ways than one...I DONT EVEN RECOGNIZE YOU RACHEL....where is the bubbly woman up and dancing and laughing and carrying on during the whole first half of December at...because this is certainly not her".
I can never understand why he gets so upset with this subject, " Jungkook just stop okay...don't do this I'm perfectly fine I'm still that bubbly happy girl okay", " NO RACHEL YOUR NOT", Jungkook let out a laugh of aggravation, " EVER SINCE YOU AND SUGA HAD THAT FIRST ARGUMENT THATS ALL YOU HAVE DONE IS ARGUE...YOUR ON AND OFF WITH EACH OTHER IS MAKING ME DIZZY...EVER SINCE YOU AND SUGA HAD THAT ARGUMENT ON THAT NIGHT YOU HAVE CHANGED RACHEL....WHY CANT YOU SEE HOW HE IS KILLING YOU".
" I SAID STOP JUNGKOOK...JUST STOP", our argument was interrupted by Suga, " is there a problem out here Jungkook?" I watched as Suga walked his way over to me and wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, " are you okay Rachel why where you yelling?", I immediately felt nauseas as he spoke asking me that, " uh it was nothing Suga I'm fine I promise", I looked at Jungkook with a stern look as Suga spoke again, " okay...you didn't answer me Jungkook is there a problem out here?", I could feel the tension coming off of Jungkook and I gave him the look like don't....," no there isn't any problem out here Suga we where just"....I felt the ice cold pricks coming from Jungkook's eye's as he looked at me with so much anger and frustration...why are you acting like this.
" you where just what?", Jungkook's stare broke from me as he spoke to Suga and said, " we where just talking Suga that's all...", " Talking about what?", " MY MOM", Suga looked at me with a confused look, " we where just talking about my mom and my sister...that's all", " oh?...okay...how are they doing by the way?", I faked a smile, " their doing great...mom's getting a little bit better day by day...and Ahro is getting a break here and there helping mom out", Suga smiled and my stone heart just melted away along with any anger I had for him at all and his voice sounded like spring rain.
" good I'm glad their doing better look I feel bad for last night", my heart skipped a beat...yet again here he was apologizing to me again and again I forgave him, " its fine Suga I shouldn't have bothered you", " I still feel bad I should have told you I had a bad day instead of flipping out on you the way I did so I went out and bought you something nice", " oh?" I watched starry eye as Suga pulled out a perfectly wrapped package wrapped in beautiful golden wrapping paper tied off with a glistening silver bow that glistened in the sun and my heart beat a 100 miles per hour and a smile swept across my face.
" oh Suga you shouldn't have", " no no take it I insist", " Awe Suga" I smiled and took the gift and glanced over at Jungkook over Suga's shoulder and he was looking at me with such a pained look and he vanished into the dorm and I took the gift and sat it on the table and began to open it, the contents within the package melted my heart " Oh Suga its beautiful ", I glanced at Suga and his cute smile crept across his face and when he spoke he spoke with so much passion in his voice, " I knew you would like it...and your gonna need it tonight".
I pulled out the contents in the package it was a beautiful silver knee high dress from saint Laurent with matching heels and jewelry and It was then that I registered what he had said " tonight what do you mean I'm going to need it for tonight?", " I'm glad you asked me and you are going out on a date tonight...I feel extremely bad for making you cry and I want to make it up to you tonight if you will let me", Suga pulled me close to him and he wrapped his arms around me and the smell of his cologne was drowning me and I fell hard for him all over again.
" Awe Suga...of course you can make it up to me tonight ", I felt Suga's cold heart skip a beat and he smiled and picked me up and spun me around and I couldn't help but smile and laugh, " Yes your the best woman I've ever met", Suga stopped spinning me and he placed his soft warm hands softly on my face and I couldn't help but smile and get lost in his beautiful dark brown eyes, " Thank you Rachel...I promise your gonna have the best night of your life", Suga smiled at me and he kissed me softly and I kissed him back softly.
I stood there and watched Suga and Rachel I don't understand why the hell she keeps forgiving him for all he does is break her heart....GOD IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY I slam my cup down so hard I thought it was going to break when I herd V's voice behind me, " woah what did that cup ever do to you", " I'm not in the mood V go away", " no I came to get a drink...what's got your temper fired up now", " don't worry about it V" I walked closer to Jungkook and followed his line of sight and I saw Suga and Rachel intertwined with one another locking lips and I looked at Jungkook and sighed " Jungkook you need to calm down and relax before he see's that she gets you like this", I growled at V's remark.
" oh please V don't give me that mushy behave yourself bull", well you need to Jungkook... I understand she gets under your skin and everything Jungkook but you got to let it go", I shake my head " no its not her that gets under my skin V IT'S HIM", " lower your voice", NO IT'S NOT LIKE THEIR GOING TO HEAR ME ANYWAY", " CALM DOWN JUNGKOOK", "NO V IT KILLS ME WHEN SHE'S IN PAIN BECAUSE OF HIM...HE'S DESTRYOING HER V AND SHE DESERVERS BETTER BUT HE HAS HIS HOOKS IN HER SO DEEP THAT SHE'S ABSOULUTLEY BLIND TO THE FACT THAT HE HURTS HER SO MUCH SHE ALWAYS RUNS BACK TO HIM AND FORGIVES HIM AND IT MAKES ME SICK....SHE DESERVES BETTER".
" I UNDERSTAND THAT JUNGKOOK BUT YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN NOW...shit cant you see...this is what he wants Jungkook...he wants you to get upset...I agree with you Jungkook...yes Rachel deserves better... but you need to give her time....in time she will see it Jungkook...give her time....and don't show that it bothers you as much...it kills all of us seeing her upset and hurt Jungkook...not just you...Suga is watching all of us...he's waiting for one of us to slip up and make a remark or a move against Rachel...and then what good are we to her...huh?"
I look at V as he has a point and I slowly calm down, " ill tell you what good we are to her if that happens Jungkook....where not a damn thing good to her then...you know why?...because he wont take it out on me...or on Jin....or on you...no he will take it all out on her...he will blame her Jungkook not us...her and then that will just hurt her more...trust me Jungkook...I know the pain...I know what you want", I snickered at V's remark " no you don't know what I want V ", " BULLSHIT JUNGKOOK", I looked at V with shock..., " you want her to just let you heal her broken heart for once Jungkook....you want her to let you show her how she should be treated".
" trust me I know Jungkook...we all do....we all want Rachel to just for once let us heal her broken heart and open her eyes and show how she should be treated Jungkook...but your not helping her by arguing about it with her Jungkook...that's not bringing her any closer to you Kookie...that's pushing her away from you...just let it go Jungkook...and then when the time is right Jungkook...when its right...then that's when you swoop in...and when you swoop in don't act like her father Jungkook...act like her friend....let her talk to you about it....listen to her....let her cry on your shoulder Jungkook...don't scold her like a father would Jungkook....comfort her....hold her close and don't let her go".
I look at V and sigh as I watch Rachel and Suga stumble back in the door and go into Suga's room to do god knows what, " Your right V....I have been scolding her instead of comforting her....thanks man" V smiled and said, " anytime man ", I smiled and laughed as we did our hand shake and gave each other a bro hug.
END OF CHAPTER ONE
TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER TWO