[Edited]
My entire body felt numb.
I knew I would probably run into him one way or another, I just didn't know it would be so soon.
Or while I was on a date.
Granted it had been only about two weeks since I last saw him, which I was hoping would last a bit longer then that.
All of the emotions I kept bottled up were threatening to spill over at this moment. Everything about him still looked the same except the color of his hair, which went from the silver color I remember he dyed over and over for months, to a more natural shade of dark brown.
The sleeves of his white button up shirt rolled up to his elbows, tucked into a pair of slouchy black pants. As I really started to look harder I noticed dark circles under his eyes, something he didn't usually have to worry about. His eyes, once brown and clear are now a bit sunken in and red, watery as they bored holes into my own.
I swallowed thickly, not quite sure what to say to him.
'The man I once loved is standing right in front of me and it's the most uncomfortable feeling ever.'
"You look good," Taehyung murmured softly, eyes trailing down my body a bit too slowly for my liking.
I hugged my arms around myself self consciously. "S-since when do you work here?" I said in a strangled voice, my palm trying to rub soothing patterns around the base of my throat as my eyes darted everywhere except his face.
"Since you left I needed another job to cover your part of the rent," he sighed, tone laced with bitterness, sadness, longing.
I almost felt bad.
Almost.
But the memories of the party flashed behind my eyes, Namjoon's words at the bakery, and my heart burned with anger. "Yeah? Well I'm sure blondie can help you take care of all of your needs," I spit out, making sure to emphasize the word all before I sneered and turned on my heel.
"So you're jealous?"
I stopped dead in my tracks. 'Why does he sound so... relieved?'
"You're still thinking about that night? About me?"
I couldn't say anything, couldn't muster up the courage to face him yet.
"So you still love me. Seems that even if you left me for him, he isn't doing a very good job at taking you away. "
I could almost hear the humorous tone in his voice, the smirk on his face.
"I loved you, Taehyung. Past tense. And I didn't leave you for him, I left you because you're a liar, a cheater, you're everything I hate," I spoke with as much confidence I could gather up, not sure if he heard me with my back still facing him.
He only heaved a sigh. "No, you want to come back to me," he argued.
I shook my head furiously, finally spinning back to face him. His elbows were leaning on the counter, smile self-satisfied. "I'll never go back to you, Tae," I kept my tone icy as I glared, not allowing the tears to fall.
'I can't let him see me cry. I have to be strong.'
"Baby, you know that I was wasted. I didn't know what I was doing."
I flinched.
'Baby.'
That nickname brought chills up my spine. Memories floated to the surface of times he would use that nickname; playfully chasing me around the house, whining when I beat him at his favorite video game, when we made love.
Well, what I thought was love.
I recoiled from the thought as a blush topped my cheeks. This is the first time I'm coming face to face with someone I slept with that I no longer call mine. Unfortunately, I know that Taehyung couldn't say the same.
"You never stop lying, do you?" I smiled sadly, looking down at the floor. "Namjoon already told me everything. I know you've been fucking her the whole time. I should have known. So don't try to use the same excuse. I should have left as soon as I caught you the first time, but I didn't, because... because I-- " Tears choked my remaining words and I covered my mouth, fighting the tears brimming my lids.
He didn't say anything for a while, probably letting those words sink in; his truth untold.
Something he didn't have the balls to say months ago.
When he still didn't speak I laughed humorlessly, sniffling quietly. "So you can save all of the lies you've prepared to try and lure me back in with, because it'll never work," I finished, trying to rush off to leave before I broke down right in front of him.
"Y/n, wait!" I could hear his foot steps and I didn't want to cause a scene by running. His hand latched onto my wrist and spun me around to face him.
"What?!"
He pulled me in against my will, crushed me against his chest in an unwanted embrace. "I still love you. I'm not going to let you go so easily."
I wavered as he whispered in my ear. But before I could say anything I felt my body being ripped away from his. I was now familiar enough with Jungkook's touch, with his scent, to know that it was him without looking.
"Yah! Get your hands off her before I break them off!" Jungkook growled, arms wrapped protectively around my waist and Taehyung stared at the closed distance between our bodies with a deadly smile stretching across his face.
I rested my hand on Jungkook's cheek and I could tell it took everything in him to pry his eyes away from Taehyung. "Hey, don't," I whispered as he met my eyes, knowing that Jungkook's anger was about to get the better of him and the few eyes in the place were starting to turn our way.
Even though I still resented Taehyung, I didn't want to get him fired. He still needed the money, something Jungkook would never understand.
'I guess a piece of me really does still care,' I bit my lip sadly at the thought.
"Y/n," Taehyung said, his eyes still glaring at Jungkook with the same sinister smirk that gave me the chills. "remember what I said."
'I still love you. I'm not willing to let you go so easily.'
The words chimed in my ears as he stalked back to his position behind the shoe counter without a second glance in our direction.
This is going to be a long never ending upward battle.
How will I survive?
A/N♡:
It's hard for me to be mad at any of the character in this book.
Taehyung went through a lot with him family. His own father killing his mother, something he feels he could prevent if he wasn't so afraid. It clearly caused him to make many bad decisions in life, he completely forgot how to love correctly and stopped caring about everything all together. Death can really ruin a person.
Y/N might not come across as very bright, but her love for Taehyung was very blinding. She admitted throughout the book that she let Taehyung get away with too much, let him hurt her too much all because she loved him and felt pity, knowing what he went through with his parents because she witnessed how cruel his father was first hand. If you think about having to watch your significant other go through all that while you can only watch helplessly, it can be hard to deal with. You might say she was cheating as well and even though she didn't kiss or sleep with Jungkook she was flirting.
She was tired, sick of having to deal with Taehyung's problems that basically became her own, but too afraid to leave the man that brainwashed her into being an obedient puppy. Taehyung was a mess and it had already been a year when the story began.
That really is a long time to be miserable, some may disagree but I can feel the struggle and understand her need to get away and find something that makes her truly happy.
I haven't really gotten into Jungkook's family either. He also struggles even if it's not exactly the same way as Taehyung.
It doesn't matter whose situation is worse, it doesn't make smaller problems any less important.
So I feel bad for all 3 of my main characters. They all have their struggles and their pain, and they all happened to have crossed paths. At the perfect or imperfect time?
That's for you to decide!
Thank you, as always, for reading! 💜
-xoxo Kay