(Bucky' P.O.V.)
As Silv rolls off the chair, we all rush forwards, Wanda catches Silv with her magic. Propping her back up in the chair the magic dissipates and we take in her appearance.
Her arms are wrinkled slightly, just from the moisture they have absorbed while inside the casings. Her brow is covered in sweat, dripping slightly onto her nose and temples.
There is blood dripping from her ear to her neck and shoulder, but it was like that when we got here the first time. When we found her after we all stood by as Pietro accused her of beating him. We didn't defend her, and we didn't try to stop it.
We let her down, we allowed our friend, life long or not, a woman that's practically family to be yelled at by Wanda's brother and a man we hardly know.
I let my sister, my second best friend, my best friends significant other be belittled by Pietro. A person I've never met until today.
We watched as Wanda used her magic to hold Jess to a wall, screaming at her. But we let her catch her and didn't question why she's back in the chair. We're all just looking at her.
"We should move her. Get her out of that be dammed thing."
Bruce pulls a wheel chair from nearby, I do the honours of picking her up from the chair and just carrying her out of the room. Ignoring the wheels that Bruce is providing.
Steve follows me partway up the hall before stopping at the elevator doors, everyone else falls behind after stopping just outside of the room containing the machine. They are all casting pained gazes out way as I carry the unconscious Silver Death down the hall. As I carry a friend that we have all betrayed away from the others and to the condiment of her own company.
The company she's always preferred.
I leave her on her bed, the bed that still faintly smells of dust even after two washes courtesy of Pepper.
Just before I leave her I take another look at her form. Her outline is expanding and contracting rapidly and it's shaking.
Her breath is off rhythm, and by the way she has shifted in the time between me setting her down and walking to where I am now she has shifted from her back to her side. Knees pulled up making a ninety degree angle from her hips. Chin to her chest, arms close to her.
I shut the door and leave her alone.
After wondering the halls for what seems like hours FRIDAY alerts me of an upcoming meeting, Fury is needing us.
At the worst possible time too.
(Silver's P.O.V.)
I am woken by an intolerable noise. Someone knocking on my door. "Go away." Wait, I passed out while just getting out from being in the head piece, I never walked back to my room.
Someone must have carried me, but I don't know who and why they all -they being the Team- didn't just leave me there.
Eventually I roll onto my back, doing my best not to move to fast. Moving quickly can make me feel sick, or make me pass out, as my brain is still trying to comprehend what just happened to try to understand what's happening currently.
Sooner or later I manage to sit, stand and shuffle to the bathroom for a shower. Partway through FRIDAY calls me to have a meeting with Fury and most of the team. Bruce and Wanda are being excluded so they can help with Wanda's brother.
After asking FRIDAY how long until the meeting and it being an hour away I sit down on the shower floor. Eyes shut, head bowed and one soft and slightly wrinkled hand against my mouth and nose keeping water out.
The water feels good against my arms after having them incased in metal for the last how long. Six to seven months?
I sit like that for awhile, doing my best to ignore the memories of me killing people,both young and old, that are surging in my brain.
FRIDAY let's me know that the meeting will be starting in ten minutes so I am forced to get out.
I change, with only one rush to the bathroom having to vomit, and make my way out the door and to the elevator. Once it stops on the correct floor I hobble out and find the meeting room where almost everyone is.
As soon as I open the door they all stare at me, one with awe on his face the others with shock or confusion.
"What I miss?"
"Y-your arms!"
"Yes Peter. My arms, but I meant with the meeting."
"Oh. Sorry."
"It's fine."
Fury clears his throat, commanding attention be drawn back to him as it was most likely was before I started through the door.
"As I was saying...." I sit down and ignore him, knowing that James won't be allowing me on this mission.
Fury runs through the basic information that we need to know, and as soon as he's done Winter forbids me from going with a quick "Silver can't go." Fury unfortunately for me agrees and says that I'll be staying here along with Pietro, Peter and Aly. Basically being mother hen and staying with the kids.
Whatever at least the two teens can take care of themselves now I only have to keep Pietro occupied and fed and he'll be out of my way. Simple. Hopefully.
The meeting let's out, and as everyone else filters out of the room I hang back with Fury, wanting to talk to him.
"Did I really infiltrate S.H.E.I.L.D.?"
"Yes, you stole a lot of files and then disappeared."
"And you only found me again because the Avengers crashed in the field near my safe house. Correct?"
"Correct. You fled when I came to your location about two weeks afterwards."
"One week, five days."
Fury looks at me strangely. "Where did you go after I arrived?"
"Russia. I had a safe house there. It got, uh. Blown up and riddled with bullet holes I think. After about a week of me being there?"
"Why did that happen?"
"HYDRA found me, or thought they found me. The Avengers team tracked me down, and came for me. Stark arrived first, I offered him something to eat I think."
"Then what?"
"Why are you asking me these questions?"
"Someone has to get you thinking. Right?"
"Fine. I had a bomb explode right beside or on me, and I passed out on the jet a few minutes after the rest of the team got there and after killing many of the agents."
"How did you end up in HYDRA?"
"There was a party here in the tower. The caterers were infiltrated by them, um, they took me but not Winter. I am unsure as too why."
Fury nods, and clicks a button on a remote I hadn't noticed before.
An old home security feed shows up on the screen, nine camera angles covering the entire house. I smile at the little girl that runs down the one hall in it. The smile stops when I realize that the girl is me, just before my mother dies. Little pink dress and pleated hair.
The first shot rings out, shattering a window and allowing a smoke canister to be thrown in easier.
A woman, brown hair and determined look in her face shows up in the bottom right corners camera, gun in hand extra clips in her back pocket.
The little girl climbs into a kitchen cupboard in the middle rows left camera.
My mother kills agents making her way through cameras, getting to the one the younger version of myself is in, and opening the door to where I am just as an agent rounds the corner.
The fatal shot rings out, I scream and the agent yanks me from my hiding spot. Weakly my mother tells him not to touch me. He doesn't listen.
Fury hits forward, to the time as to when my father walks through the front door in the top left hand sides camera. There's already a scared look on his face, and if you read his lips you can see him muttering 'please let there be no bodies.'
As he rounds the corner to where my mother's body lies his knees hit the floor.
Fury turns off the screen.
"Why did you show me that?"
"To show you that HYDRA has no mercy."
I look him dead in the eye, easing out of my chair slowly. "I am very well informed that they don't have anything close mercy. I was put through something worse than hell while there. I have had my mind messed with to many times. If you think I am working for them while I am standing here you have another thing coming."
With that I leave the room. Screw you Fury.
After trying my best to calm myself down I realize that I can't. Instead I'm making what ever is wrong worse, as if adding fuel to a raging fire. My head is dancing through multiple scenarios, scaring itself for no real reason. Hands shaking, breathing almost painful.
All of a sudden I just snap.
In a deserted hall I fall to my knees and allow the tears I have held for much to long to fall.
Tears for my mother, father, Damian, Anatoly, Alex, James, Natasha and eventually for myself.
I hate being weak.
The scenes of their deaths, real or not flash behind my eyelids. Always with me holding the gun to put the bullet between their eyes or I'm the one gripping the knifes hilt as the blade is driven through ribs and a heart. I'm always the one killing.
My breathing starts to catch, soon I can't breath properly and end up leaning against the wall, eyes shut but listening. Still trying to calm myself.
Eventually I am calm enough to avoid people and rush to my room where I allow myself to fall apart completely.
(As of 00:42 or 12:42am July 12th 2019 this book was 1st in the #Avengers)
(Also, - very sorry to bother y'all- thoughts about the Wattys? Enter or pass?)