Maybe I messed up.
But what else is new? I do everything on an impulse. Those who know me should know this by now.
I always believed that there has always been a way out, but maybe this time I was far over my head to believe that we could do something for Elena Gilbert. I was sure that once we got rid of Kai, at least we'd have a free path to sort things out. But now that everything seems attached to what Kai's powers were, I'm not sure if I could help Bonnie break this curse without losing her.
That was my biggest concern. I didn't want to end up losing my best friend just so someone like Damon Salvatore could have the love of his life back. I didn't think he deserved it, but if this is what Bonnie wanted, then I was willing to do my best. But yet, nothing was coming up.
It was all a great distraction from what was really on my mind.
But that didn't make it all go away. After my slight recovery from the battle, things had begun to slowly come to light, and the rude awakening I was hoping to avoid had come full circle. I wanted to believe that just maybe I was able to move on without disturbances, but now I made shit a lot worse than I had planned, and that was I messing things up once again.
I guess it all sums up to Paul and Tyler.
Two men who would seem entirely different in every way, but somehow eerily similar to a point. Tyler still believed that he was the boss in many ways, and when it came down to me, he still had his habits of believing that I would jump for him when I used to. Still, the cocky bastard that thought I belonged to him the moment another man came into my life, it's just... I didn't know that another came into my life.
Now Paul was different this time. What used to be a close replica to Tyler; sworn to be twins in some way by their volatile personalities and assertive yet stubborn personalities –faded with someone I never thought I would know. It was as if the worlds shifted the moment he came back into my life, all because he claims that I changed his life in a way I didn't want to. I still don't believe him, but when his entire pack as his witness –it's hard to deny the fact that I just maybe his imprint.
It didn't make sense either. Especially when the purpose of it totally voids the reason why it all seems plausible. I couldn't give Paul what an imprints purpose could be. A child was far from my capabilities -everyone knew that, if this was some sick joke, then they needed to drop it before someone gets hurt.
But the thing was, Paul's personality has changed so much that I found it hard to believe that this was the same man who threatened my life more than once, only to promise to protect me in every way he could. Catering to me when I was recovering? Tending to my wounds when I didn't ask him? Concerned for my well being when he was close to taking my life before? Now, all tossed aside because he believes that I'm the center of his world.
I could hope for the difference. But when it came to Tyler, things would go downhill in a second. Jealousy -something I thought I would never see in either of them.
Whenever Tyler would even come close to me, Paul's stance would change drastically from calm to a monster ready to rip his prey to shreds, and Tyler was always the target because he believes he deserved another chance with me.
I couldn't stand it whenever they became animals.
I had to threaten them both to stay away from me if it all continued. Even so, I wasn't sure why I even gave the proposition when a part of me didn't want either of them near me.
But then there's the other part of me that missed having them around. Why? I still wasn't sure.
Bonnie said it was the imprint playing its course. That had me questioning why I still missed Tyler. Seth says that has to do entirely with what I felt about him in the past. It may have been real, but so was the constant abuse of it all. Tyler was the same, but Paul was someone I hadn't known.
It scared me.
I wanted to handle this all cautiously. I didn't want to address any of this without thinking about it entirely. But I just couldn't sit myself down to do either when I wanted to distract myself rather than face the reality of it.
"Any luck on finding anything?" That was Caroline. She hasn't really left Bonnie or my side since Elena was finally laid to rest.
"Nothing," I said frustrated, finally closing the book before grabbing another coffee. "The more I look into them, it just seems it leads back to the spirit realms, and that's not exactly where Elena is."
"Where is she then?" She asked.
"We believe it to be on an entirely different plain, one that Kai created where Elena practically lives by herself." Bonnie added as she walked into the kitchen, "I figured it may be the same one Damon and I were trapped in with him, but even so, that was far from what we could reach."
"Isn't there anything written on the different worlds?" Seth asked as he followed Bonnie.
"There wouldn't be if it was created with Kai's ideas in mind," I muttered. "He clearly knew what he was doing when he implemented the spell."
"Sad to say. But Brandon's right." Bonnie sat next to me. "If there were another realm that Kai has created, it would be up to Elena to find the portal key or keys to escape it. The problem is, we can't communicate with her long enough anymore to even search for clues."
"I just don't get how he bound her existence to Bonnie's, it doesn't make sense when she's a vampire and Bonnie is a witch." I thought out loud. "Vampires are immortal, why connect her to Bonnie when Bonnie can only live so long? Why not connect her to another vampire to make it permanent?" The comment earned me a few stares, "I'm not saying I would wish it upon her, but Kai had something up his sleeve if he wanted us to end Bonnie's life just save Elena's."
"Because if I die, the magic that continues through me dies with me." Bonnie replied, "no offense B, but he saw me as his biggest threat at the time."
"But he didn't know about Brandon until he returned." Tyler entered the room. "You have to give him credit for being able to go against Kai for as long as he did."
"Of course we know that Brandon is powerful," Bonnie replied, "which is why we were sure that he was still trying to make a connection for him to join us in some way."
"He couldn't when I'm regaining what I didn't have." I replied, thinking out loud, "sure I'm slowly getting back what I lost, but to my full potential, he couldn't do a thing when I don't even know what exactly I'm capable of. I did, in fact, break an imprint and somehow transferred it..." I paused in thought. Earning stares from everyone including the Sam and Paul who had walked in.
"What is it?" Caroline asked.
"The transfer!" Bonnie pin-pointed. "He used the same methods."
"But only he knows where Elena is." I stated, "grandma was the one who led me to Rachel before they both disappeared into the light."
"I know," Bonnie said, "but he used the same connection an imprint has been used, only with the opposite effect. If we can reverse the effects of it then we can just maybe shift the spell to where Elena lives as long as I do."
"But how?" I asked. "Shifting it could risk the factors of you both dying and the spell being permanent. I won't do it."
"Not if you break the bind," Sam added. "I don't mean to meddle, but if Brandon was able to reach Rachel in some way, then there has to be a way to bring Bonnie there to break the ties."
"But how?" Bonnie asked.
"You both need to come with us." Paul finally added, earning a growl from Tyler.
"No," I interrupted, "Sam just may be right. When I went to La Push, I was able to tap into the spirit worlds with ease because the lands are sacred enough. I can't explain it really, but it seemed that there were more open doors there because the lands are still pure with magic, almost untouched."
"But wouldn't that taint the sacredness of the lands then?" Seth asked, "I'm just saying if we disturb what lies back home, what risks are we facing."
"We won't," I assured Seth, "I promise. We just need help from the other side to help a friend, then we leave as soon as we can."
"So you're going back to La Push?" Tyler asked upset.
"I have to," I replied bluntly. "I'll be safe."
"Only if I can go to," Tyler demanded.
"You have no say in this." I replied, "you can't simply tag along, especially when there is a pack already there."
I couldn't blame him for storming off, but it was the truth. Paul seemed satisfied with my decision, but that didn't mean that I was agreeing to give him a chance in any way.
It was decided that we'd leave in the morning and return to La Push, and in order for this to work, Sam made communications with Jacob to make a proposal to the vampire's back in Forks to keep Elena safe until we could figure things out, which meant that Caroline, Stefan, and Damon would be tagging along -Tyler hadn't been seen since.
Aunt Tiffany seemed happy that I was returning to stay for a while with Bonnie tagging along with me. Since the last visit, Bonnie and she had seemed to form a friendship that I hadn't really known about until now.
My mind kept going back and forth to how it ended up the way it had, so far at least. The complications mostly and how I was going to fix everything. It's just... I seemed to always be trying to fix things. No one seems to step up to the plate. But I guess when your family is a coven of witches and you have that power to make some sort of change, you always seem to be there. I tried avoiding it in the beginning. But somehow I always ended up entangled in the webs.
The entire trip I basically ignored everyone. Since there has been a lot on my mind lately, I just can't seem to get anything straight. Sure we might have a plan to get Elena back, but that doesn't mean it will work. But like I said, it was enough to distract me from the real pandemonium just waiting to happen. That would be another thing I'd need to address before it got worse.
Tyler was never one to settle, and Paul didn't seem to be either. Yet, in a way, I had both of them in the palms of my hands, and I didn't like it one bit. I could see how Paul's persona changed so quickly, but for the life of me, I couldn't understand where Tyler was coming from anymore. It was like I was being pranked in some way. It was hard to trust in both of them when I knew the motives of one -sort of, and clueless to the other. Two different paths where I couldn't see the finish lines.
I think this was a way for Sam to get me here too. If I were to associate with Paul more, maybe it would make me open my eyes in some way? I don't know.
It scared me though. I've seen what Paul was capable of, and what I was capable of being around him. We could seriously harm each other and not know of it until after the deed is done. I don't want to end up killing him because he suddenly lost it.
It goes the same for Tyler. His anger always got the best of him, and there was no say whether he'd be patient with me. What would I do just to survive? I wasn't exactly as weak as I used to be, and as my powers continued to build up, who's to say what I am capable of?
I didn't want to be even next to Tyler if that meant he was still the same asshole I remembered him as. He was never one to be entirely faithful when it came to relationships, and he was never one to care much about the other if he had broken someone's heart, especially mine.
So many times he had broken me and I let him do it. I used to convince myself that this is what I deserved; it was going to be the best I could probably get in a relationship. I'd remain his secret until he was brave enough to tell the world that it was me that he always came running back to.
Where did this all change?
"Are you okay B?" I turned to see a concerned look on Bonnie's face.
"I'm fine," I muttered, turning back to the window to watch the rain trickle down the glass. "Just thinking."
"The spell should work," she replied, "we just need to remain focused."
"It's not that Bon." I replied turning to her again, leaning back in my seat, "It's Tyler and Paul. I don't know what I'm going to do."
"Oh, I forgot about that." She said staring straight ahead. "Are you afraid?"
I nodded.
"What part of it scares you?" She asked concerned.
"Everything," I admitted. "I've never been used of being the center of attention, always falling for the bad boy, and now that they're both looking at me in entirely different ways, I don't know what to believe."
"I can't say much for Paul, but I'm sure you've seen every aspect of Tyler," She sighed, "maybe you need to talk to Paul and get to know him, maybe it's more than what you expected and Tyler will just have to accept that."
"What are you Team Paul now?" I chuckled.
"No, I'm Team Brandon, and if either of them hurt you, I will let them feel my wrath whether you say I can or not." She giggled, "I'm not standing on the sidelines anymore while I have to watch them hurt my little brother."
I smiled. The thing with Bonnie and me, we didn't need a label for our friendship, but if we had to give it one, siblings would be close to it. I love Bonnie like my sister, which is why I'd do anything to help her, and she'd do the same. We didn't need blood to show just how connected we were.
"When you get the chance," she added, "talk to Paul, and see whom he really is. See who the man is behind the wolf. If it was just meant to be a friendship or something more, that would be something he'd have to accept too."
"Yeah, you're probably right." I shrugged.
"Aren't I always?" She teased.
"Don't push it," I teased back.
By the time we reached the Call's house, aunt Tiffany already had a welcoming dinner prepared before Embry had to tend to his pack duties. Sam mentioned that he would check on the others as they arrived at the Cullen's, and he'd help them settle the best he could as long as Jacob was there.
I never really met Jacob other than him making an appearance with the pack when he was needed. But that was the thing; I wasn't sure how his story really played out. When they mentioned that he had imprinted on the half-vampire girl that was somehow born into the coven, I was questionable on it.
It seemed just as strange as Paul imprinting on me. If they were to have children though, who's to say what kind of species they would breed next, and a big part of me wasn't willing to find out exactly what that was.
I wanted to ask Sam about it, but I just didn't think it was my place to do so. But whatever was to become of them, I was sure wouldn't be good. For some reason, the demon-hounds came to mind. Vicious dog-like creatures that thirsted for blood and were hardly tameable, even known to kill their own kind just to survive.
Maybe there was another prophecy we didn't know about. I kept looking at Bonnie thinking that maybe there was a reason I needed to bring her here.
"How was dinner?" Aunt Tiffany asked unsurely.
"It was great, Auntie," I smiled, "I've just had a lot on my mind."
"So I've heard," she hugged me, "just know that I'm here to talk if you ever need it."
"Thanks, Auntie." I kissed her cheek and went straight to my room.
I wasn't tired, but I was exhausted. By then my mind was ready to shut down and my body collapsed against the bed. I didn't remember much other than the strange dream that followed.
The spirit realm.
Still gloomy and silent. No souls to be found. No sounds or voices to be heard. A dead space where nothing or no one existed, a place filled with nothings and disappointments. Trees stayed still as the wind blew the fog around the dark area. I knew then that somehow I was being led to the answers to my questions. I just need to be ready.
Then there was a meadow. I was in the center as I scanned my surroundings, finding nothing but the dead silence whispering eerie nothings in my ear.
As I expected; silhouettes.
Five of them?
All surrounding me in a distance, small shadows moving around me until they finally stopped in their tracks, waiting. The first to approach was in front of me. I couldn't make out exactly who or what it was as it moved slowly towards me. Gliding forward at a slow pace until the form of a human appeared. I stood with a faltered breath as I waited with a bated breath. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I knew this would be the first key to what I needed to figure out on my own.
I could see the fog come from my heavy breaths. My palms were sweaty, my face heated with sweat trickling down the side of my face. I was in panic mode as I began to realize just who was walking towards me.
I could've sworn I seen a ghost. I wanted to fall to my knees and cry because it couldn't have meant what I was sure it did. It couldn't be the person standing in front of me, in the spirit world.
But there she stood.
Bonnie.
I shot forward drenched in sweat, panicking as I tossed my blankets to the side and raced out my door to the room across from mine. I quickly turned on the light as I called out to my best friend, realizing she was in the same state as I was in.
"BONNIE!" I cried out, shaking her small frame as she slowly began to open her eyes, "BONNIE! WAKE UP!" I called out again.
At the moment she opened her eyes, she pulled me into her grasp and began to hug me as tightly as ever could, crying out to me that she was so happy that I was okay, how happy she was that it was all just a nightmare. I did my best to calm her, wondering exactly what she was seeing, or what she saw.
As I wiped her tears, aunt Tiffany must've heard the commotion and came to our aid, hugging us both and asking if we were okay. She offered to get us water as she realized just how drained we felt. I looked into her eyes just as she had, and I knew then what she saw, and I was sure she saw what I saw. In her place, I was there. We saw each other in the spirit world, and the first thing that came to mind was that we were both taken without knowing.
"I really thought I lost you this time," I mumbled as I hugged her again.
"I know how you felt, it felt so real, and I don't get it." She wiped a tear as she pulled back, taking the glass of water from aunt Tiffany.
"But it felt like a ritual." I admitted, taking a drink as well, "I could see you across from me, and you walked closer while the other's remained in their spots surrounding us."
"There were six of us?" She asked me unsure, I nodded. "I couldn't see the other's though."
"Neither could I," I shrugged. "But something tells me that we're missing quite a bit of the puzzle. One of them has to be Elena at least, I'm sure."
"I figured so, but there are three more unaccounted for." She added. "Something tells me that we need to find the answers before its too late."
"You felt it too?" I asked.
She looked at me a bit shaken before responding. "The deadline. Yeah, it was like if we were being cut short for it too."
"That means that we have to find out more about this dream," I stated.
"But only if we let it reveal itself." She added, "something tells me that coming here has more reasons than we had imagined, which means that one of them could be the imprint."
I looked at her confused. "Do you mean Paul's imprint on me."
She nodded while aunt Tiffany continued to listen. "Paul imprinting on you could be the key to finding out just how strong the bond is, and how much he could most likely help us figure this out."
"I don't mean to sound doubtful," I shrugged, "but I don't think the imprint has anything to do with it, but a hint of what might happen if we go through with this."
"What do you mean?" Aunt Tiffany asked.
"We just might have to break another imprint for this to work," I suggested.
"But why? And how would that work?" She asked.
"Think about in Bon," I explained, "when I broke the imprint for Paul, it was moved towards me, Paul is now tied to me in every way as Sam explained it. Maybe we'll need you to break another imprint for you to be tied to a wolf rather than to Elena, shifting it to another being where Elena might be able to come back to life."
"But who?" She looked at me confused.
"That I don't know exactly." I shrugged again, "but there has to be some way that we could maybe tie you with a wolf, or maybe one of them will imprint on you."
"But haven't they all imprinted?" Bonnie asked.
"No," aunt Tiffany replied, "as far as I know, my Embry and the Clearwater children still haven't imprinted."
"So either of them could?" I questioned.
"If she hasn't met one of them yet." Aunt Tiffany explained, "it's kind of like love at first sight. We believed the reason Paul imprinted on you Brandon was that you were the first that was meant to meet his sights before Rachel should have. If he saw you first, you most likely would have been Paul's imprint before Rachel could have been."
"But I've met all three of them," Bonnie added. "Either they had and haven't told me, or we're out of luck on that route."
"Is everything okay?" We all turned to see Embry leaning against the door.
"Oh Embry, Honey!" Aunt Tiffany giggled, "you scared us."
"We're fine Embry." Bonnie blushed a little, "we were just discussing theories."
"Imprints?" He asked. We all shrugged, "I hate to disappoint, but there hasn't been a new imprint since Paul, so it's a no-go for Bonnie as far as we know."
"Yeah..." I muttered, "thanks for letting us know Embry."
I followed aunt Tiffany and Bonnie out the room when Embry pulled me aside for a moment. I was caught a bit off guard when he looked a bit concerned.
"Is everything okay Embry?"
"Yeah!" He said nervously, "I normally wouldn't do this, but when I see my brother hurting over this, I need to ask you a favor."
"Brother? What?" I asked confused.
"Paul's outside." He said, "he wants to talk."
I stayed silent for a moment before looking back up to him.
"Please," Embry begged, "just give him a chance."
Even though I wasn't looking forward to any confrontations any time soon, I knew that they would eventually come. I figured I'd get this over with and see what Paul wanted, and maybe I could get some answers to questions I had.
I quickly grabbed my coat and slipped on my shoes and informed the others that I'd be outside for a bit. As I turned on the porch light and closed the door behind me, it didn't take long for Paul to emerge from the tree line in nothing but jean shorts. To say I was a bit overwhelmed was just the gist of it. I couldn't help but stare at him before he was barely a foot away from me.
I stood frozen.
There he was, in front of me, standing over six feet, staring down at me like he wanted to cry.
I wasn't sure what had urged me to do so, but I reached my hand up and wiped his dry cheek. He quickly covered his massive hand over mine and leaned into my touch, rubbing my hand over his cheek, tracing the cheekbone and the corner of his lips before he let my hand fall back to my side.
"I'm sorry," he turned shamefully, "I didn't mean to."
What could I say? What could I do other than stare into his enchanting eyes? I was lost just as he was. I figured the next best thing to do was to sit on the step below me, hoping he'd join me, which he had.
Compared to him, I was almost half his size. Just sitting next to him, I could feel the heat come off of him.
"I don't know what to say," I admitted.
"You don't have to say a thing." He turned to me, "I just needed to see you. I don't mean to sound selfish, but just being near you helps me get through the day."
"I'm sorry." I apologized.
"For what?" He shrugged with a chuckle, "for being you? If so, don't be, it's the best part of my day."
"I'm not sure how I feel though Paul." I rocked back and forth slightly for a distraction. "I don't know what to think."
"Then don't." He started, "I know it's not easy, but I just want you to know that even moments like this help more than you can imagine."
"But will it ever be good enough for you?"
"That I don't know." He stared back down. "But I came here in hope that you just might listen to what I have to say, what I want to say."
"What is it you have to say then?" I asked.
"That I'm in love with you." That was quick. I thought. "I know it sounds a bit much, but I've never felt this way about anyone, and I want you to know that these feelings began to develop even before the imprint."
"I kind of find that hard to believe Paul," I admitted.
"I know, I know, I really had a shitty way of showing it." He was beginning to cry a little again, "but believe me, if I knew how to express it properly in the first place, then I would have. But it's just like you came into my life, and I was afraid that what I had with Rachel didn't matter because I was selfishly falling for you without even knowing you. I didn't even have to be introduced to you in the first place to know that you meant something to me. I can't explain it Brandon, but when you came around, for once I actually had hope again. "
"Then why the violence?"
"Violence is the only thing I really knew -and to see what I did to you- I hate myself every day for it. I could never forgive myself for it." He really was showing his vulnerable side to me, "I would never lay another hand on you the way I had, and I would never let another treat you like you don't mean a thing."
"You're talking about Tyler, aren't you?" I wondered.
"Of course I'm talking about him." He said frustrated, "after the shit he put you through, and for me to do the same damn thing, I just can't understand what you see in us. Don't get me wrong, I want to the chance to get show you that I'm not just the inconsiderate prick that you know, that I'm so much more than that, I can treat you right Brandon, and I tend to."
"What type of future do you see for us?" I had to know his expectations.
"If I have to start off being your friend, I will." He paused longer than I expected, deep in thought before he continued, "I'm hoping you don't ask me just to be your friend though. I have to tell you the truth Brandon, I don't know if I could handle just being your friend, especially if that meant I'd have to watch you love another. But if I have to, I will try my best. But If you give me that chance to show you how it feels to have someone telling you that they love you every day, that they would do anything to make you happy, that they would do anything to protect you and cherish you until the day you die, I want to be that person."
I was a bit lost for words. Here Paul was, pouring his heart out to me, and I was clueless how to respond. I was never told anything to these measures, and it all seemed a bit unreal to believe, as much as I wanted it to.
"What do you see when you see me?" I asked.
"A damaged soul, waiting to be healed." He admitted, "but mostly a human being that can become one of the most powerful witches I had ever come across. You care for the ones you love; deeply. You have a big heart that is strong enough to fight anything that comes it's way, but one that's afraid to love. I see a man with flaws and rather than succumbing to them, he overpowers the things he's lost and turns them into something he can overtake. Some may say different, but what I see is someone perfect."
"I'm hardly close to perfect," I admitted.
"You can't see it, but in time you will." He replied with assurance, "don't ever let anyone tell you different."
Just as he stood and what looked like he was ready to leave.
"Wait!" I stood up next to him. "So what does this mean?"
He stayed silent as he reached down to my hand, lifting it to his lips as he places a soft kiss on the back of it. I slowly looked up to meet his gaze as he cocked a smile, knowing I was lost in his touch already.
"If you don't mind, I'd like to take you out for dinner or something."
"I don't think I will have the time..." I paused, "well... with everything going on that is."
"Fine," He grinned even bigger, "I'll bring dinner to you. I'll see you at five tonight."
Before I could answer, he jogged off into the forest and phased into his wolf. I watched in awe as he majestically maneuvered through the trees until stopping on the peak behind the house that overlooked the ocean, letting out what seemed to be a howl of victory, followed by a few other howls before disappearing into the forest.
I stood frozen with a dumb smile attached to my face.
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I want to take a moment to those who have voted, followed me, or even took the time to read my stories. I do have a few more stories coming up that are edits, and an original story that I hope to post once I develop the storyline and the characters more.