I felt something small pounding into my chin. I pushed it off but a few minutes later it found its way back onto my face.
I opened my eyes and see a foot on my chest. I sit up a bit and Kenny is sprawled all over the bed with half of his body on me.
I was going to sleep on the couch but Kenny wanted me to sleep with him because he said he was scared.
I check my phone to see what time it is and it's six in the morning.
I push Kenny over a bit and get out of bed. After getting dressed in gray sweats and a white t I went downstairs to get some work done. I haven't been to work in a week and I'm pretty far behind on meeting and events.
"Do you love mommy?"
I looked up from my computer and saw Kenny standing there in the huge t-shirt I gave him.
"What?"
"Do you love mommy?"
"Sit down" I said and patted the couch next to me. He walked over and climbed on the couch.
"Why do you ask?" I looked at him.
"I had a dream that you loved her"
"What kind of dream?"
"I don't know, you were with mommy" he shrugged.
"I love your mother very much"
"Why?" He looked at me with big eyes.
I frowned and thought for a second. "She's nice to me, and she's beautiful"
"How do you know her?" He asked. I got quiet trying to think of what to say. "Did you... meet her at a party?"
"No" I laughed.
"Did you... Hmm" he put his hand on his chin, thinking. "Meet at the gym?"
"No not at the gym, we just saw each other in the store and became friends"
"Oh" he hummed. "Is she going to come home?"
"I hope so"
"Can we go see her now?"
"After breakfast, okay?"
He shook his head. "We gotta go now, then breakfast" he jumped off the couch and ran into the bedroom.
-
"Mommy!" He squealed as he ran to Valentina. She was still sleeping but he dragged a chair to her bed and climbed on top of it to see her better.
"She was up earlier" the same doctor said from yesterday. I looked at his name tag and it said Sam.
"Really?" I looked at him.
"Yea, she woke up at six this morning"
"That's good though right?"
"She was up for about two hours then fell asleep again. It took all of her energy and she kept throwing up, she needs a whole lot of rest"
I nodded and looked at Kenny messing with Valentina's face.
"Is that him?" Sam asked.
"Yea"
He chuckled. "He looks just like you" he turned on his heel and left the room.
I walked over to Valentina and sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the bed.
Kenny was pulling on her oxygen cord. "Don't do that" I said.
"What is that... on Mommy's face?"
"It's a cord that has oxygen in it and it pushes air into her nose so she can breath"
"Oh" Kenny said interested.
I grabbed Valentina's hand and held it tight.
"Wake up, V" I whispered in her ear.
Kenny got down from the chair and came over to me. "Can I play a game on your phone?"
"Yea" I pulled out my phone and he started searching for games to play while he sat in a chair across the room.
"I miss you" I said talking to Valentina again. "I've missed you for so long, all these years I couldn't get you. I need you, Kenny needs you, we need you to wake up"
"When is mommy going to get up?" Kenny groaned.
"I'm not sure yet" I answered him.
"I don't know what to do without you, I can't function properly without you, and I'm so sorry I put you through hell these past five years. I will never forgive myself for what I put you through. Taking care of Kenny on your own, dealing with your mother and- that must've been a lot. He's beautiful" I said referring to Kenny. "You're doing a great job"
I sighed and stood up. "Lets go get breakfast" I said to Kenny. "We'll come back later"
We walked out of the hospital and I took him to Ihop.
"Do you go to school?"
"Yes" He said. He was going back and forth from his pancakes to drawing a picture. "Ms. Emily is nice"
"Is she really?"
"Yea, she lets us draw and dance and-" he shoved food in his mouth.
"Don't shove that much in your mouth, you're gonna choke"
He nodded and spit some of it out.
"Christmas is coming up, are you excited for that?" I asked.
"Yea!" He exclaimed.
"What do you want?"
"I want candy and toys and shoes..." I listened to him and took mental notes as he told me everything he wanted for Christmas. When we finished eating John called and said he would meet us at the hospital.
"Kenny!" A voice said excited as we entered the room.
I looked up and Valentina was sitting up looking toward the door.
"Mommy!" Kenny ran toward her and climbed onto the hospital bed.
"I missed you" she hugged him tight and kissed him.
I stood there watching letting them have their moment.
"Hey Joshua" she looked at me.
"Hey Valentina" I sighed. Hearing her voice was all I needed.
I walked over to her bed and sat down. "Where's John?" She asked.
"He's on his way"
She rested her head back and scrunched her eyebrows. "Kenny wasn't with him?"
"No he was with me"
"Josha got me food mommy!" Kenny exclaimed.
She smiled at me. "Thank you Josha" she said my name wrong on purpose.
"How are you feeling?" I looked
"I've been better" she blinked slowly. She ran her hands through Kenny's curly hair as he laid on her chest. "What happened to him?"
"He's in custody" She sighed and looked at me. "Valentina I'm so sorry I got you in this mess, I'm so sorry that I caused all of this from the beginning. If only I'd just told you about everything then-"
"Then I wouldn't have been blessed with... Kenny" she cut me off.
"No you would still have him. I would just be in his life I would be a better father" he whispered. "I'm turning into a man I don't want to be"
"What are you saying?"
"I want to give you time but I want you to know that I love you and I'll be waiting when your ready. I need you and I promise you everything"
She looked at the floor and then at Kenny. "Everything is a lot Joshua, especially after five years and with all that's happened I think I just need to be alone"
"Alone in your state is the worst place to be. Let me take care of you, you're still my wife"
She frowned and closed her eyes. "Joshua don't -"
"I'm not and I won't" I cut her off. "I'm giving you time, as much as you need. I love you Valentina"