"Are you sure all you want to do is go to Disneyland for your birthday?" I double and triple check with Abby on her birthday decisions even though I already have a special trip to the Hamptons set up for her.
"Yes, baby! I'm positive! After we went for your birthday earlier this year I forgot how much fucking fun and magical it is there, plus they treat you like actual royalty," she kisses me taking her lunch to the trash can of our trailer.
"They don't treat me like royalty," I scoff shoving the last bit of food on my plate into my mouth and chugging my bottled water. "That's disgusting and also yes they fucking do! You get all this special treatment, you are an actual Disney princess," Abby scrunches up her nose at my rush to finish my lunch. I wouldn't be rushing if she didn't want to just make out during our entire lunch hour! Every time we have a scene where we're arguing she always feels the need to make out with me after, probably turned on by it — I mean, can't deny that it's a bit of a turn on but still. EVERY. TIME. My lips are numb!
"Well, if I am a Disney princess like you say I am, that can only mean that you should be on your knees bowing," I smirked cocking my head and bouncing my brows at my very sexy girlfriend. "Maybe, if you're a good little princess I'll be on my knees and more when we get home!" She bounces out leaving me in a pool.
"HEY! WAIT! COME BACK!!" I shout after her. I finally catch up to her, which isn't too hard with her tiny legs. "What if I'm trying a birthday sex month like you did with me?" I whisper in her ear. "Because after your injury," she spins on her heel so we're so close together you could hold a needle between us, grabbing at my hip and groin where I had hurt myself back in March, making my breath hitch. "We promised we wouldn't do that again, at least not that many times in a row and if we do every day leading up to my birthday...at the END of the month, neither of us will be okay." My tease of a girlfriend pushes me back on my heels spinning on her own and heading back to our set.
"Who's birthday is it today?" The Disneyland cast member asks me, "it's my girlfriend's birthday today!!" I say enthusiastically. She writes Abby's name on a birthday button and hands it to her, writing one for me, Angie, Jeff, Kasey, and Zach — all of them saying "it's HER birthday" which we all wore proudly.
The six of us make our way through the park, going from one attraction to the other, not having to deal with people stopping us too much because of the "special treatment" we've been given.
"Baby, I want a pickle," my birthday lady requests. "Over there, how many are you getting this time? Five of each because last time you ate these I wouldn't kiss you the entire day with that nasty ass pickle breath of yours!" I tease. "These are totally worth it," she picks up four packages of pickles and drops them into my backpack after we pay. "Those'll be the only phallic things in Abby's mouth," Jeff and Zach tease making everyone hysterically laugh at our birthday girl's expense. "Yeah, yeah, says the guys who wishes they were that size!" Abby bites back sticking her tongue out at them behind us.
Our guide, Brandi, takes us to Space Mountain and both Abby and Angie have us ride the ride two times in a row because when we pulled up at the end of the ride the ride tech joked, "again?" Little did he know he would get a whole spaceship of yeses.
"Where would you guys like to go next?" Brandi asks walking backwards to face our group. "Peter Pan!!" I shout with glee. "All the Fantasyland rides, please!!" Jeff and Zach groan, of course, because in Fantasyland are all the original storybook rides from when the park first opened, "King Arthur's Carousel, Snow White, Peter Pan, Mr. Toad's Wilde Ride, Pinocchio, Dumbo, Alice in Wonderland, and the Storybook Land Canals. I made them ride all of them.
After lunch Abby request to go on Splash Mountain. The six of us manage to all fit on a log and before we even get to the drops and any opportunity for us to get "splashed" all of us are already drenched from wetting each other, me being everyone's target, "this is for Fantasyland!" Zach shouts scooping a giant hand of water at my back from his seat after leaning over.
"Wow, you guys took the splash in Splash Mountain very seriously," Brandi laughs after we all climb out of the log ride dripping wet. "That's okay, we can head over to California Adventure and try and dry you guys off or stick you on Grizzly River Run then dry you off?" She asked while all of us squeeze dried our clothes. We were all thankful for the drench of water since it was another LA scorcher.
"I think Grizzly River Run then a new set of clothes, on Olivia," Jeff laughs. "It's Princess to you, asshat!" I bite back laughing. We all head to the exit of the park to get to DCA with Kasey chuckling every five seconds, "what are you fucking laughing at?" Abby turns around giggling. "We're leaving footprints, we're so wet," Kasey points to the ground where we are indeed leaving a trail of wet footprints. "Oh my god," I throw my head back laughing.
Abby and I were swinging our locked hands back and forth, her free hand snacking on another pickle, "are you having a good birthday, munch?" I ask, looking at her — her hair in a bun because it got wet from the rides and if she let it down her Italian curls will be in full effect. She's glowing because it's golden hour and she looks absolutely adorable munching on her pickle. She's wearing Minnie ears and jean shorts with mickey heads all over them and a grey disney sweatshirt that makes her look like she's 15 and I wonder what my life would have been like if I met Abby when she was 15, grew up to know her, became her friend — would we fall in love at 15 versus in our twenties?
I think about 15 year old Abby and how she was already workshopping her hit broadway show with Jon and what I was doing at 15...I was a freshman in high school. I'm sure if I were given the chance, fifteen year old me would still fall in love with Abby because of her smile, her doe eyes, her infectious laugh, her ambition, her humor, her heart...I would have fallen in love with her voice, at fifteen or twenty five. But would she be ready to fall in love with me? I'm sure the two of us would be terrified, if we're scared now, I can only imagine how scared we would be at 15.
"Oh my god, I'm having so much fun!!! I love Disneyland, baby! We need to get passes and come more often!" She gushes and I forget what I even asked her. "Yeah!! Liv can we get passes?" Angie begs who was part of our group that would come once a week with Lucas. "Oh my god, I already sold my soul to Disney once!" I joke.
"Alright, so, you guy have gotten to ride practically every right — big and small. Are there any shows you want to watch? The firework show? World of Color? Fantastic?" Brandi asks us over dinner at the Blue Bayou but before she can even finish Angie and I burst out, "FANTASMIC!!!"
"Never seen it," Zach confesses. The five of us all say "oh my god" at the same time, Angie and I saying it with completely admiration of the show but Abby and Jeff groan knowing what's about to come.
"Seriously thought? You've never, ever seen it? It's the greatest thing about Disneyland! It tells such a perfect story! The anticipation, love stories, a climax! Ugh! It's storytelling at its finest!!" I gush which leads to Angie and practically acting out and singing the entire show.
I've been coming to Disneyland since I was two years old. My first memory as a child is my family trip to Disneyland with my parents. We were pass holders when I grew up, always watching "Fantasmic" I know that show like the back of my hand — just like this park. It's my childhood all in one place. Every good memory I have with my parents growing up was here. Every single one.
"Lucky for you guys we have VIP seats for the Fantasmic show tonight!" Brandi exclaims after talking to someone on the phone.
"Perfect!" I exclaim. "OHMYGOD WAIT! Abby do you want to see something else? It's your birthday! I'm sorry!!!" I apologized profusely losing myself in the excitement of the show. "No! No! This is fine! Seeing your excitement is enough for me," she says kissing me making me feel like the firework show already began.
When the Princesses and Princes come out on the Rivers of America singing their medley, I don't hold back, singing it to Abby while she rests against my chest, my arms draped over her shoulders.
Tale as old as time, true as it could be. Barely even friends, then somebody bends unexpectedly. Certain as the sun...rising in the East. Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme, Beauty and the Beast.
What would I give, if I could live out these waters. In your imagination...what would I pay to spend the day warm on the sand? Dream a fantastic dream! Betcha on land, they understand, that they don't reprimand their daughters, bright young women, sick of swimming...ready to stand.
Someday, my PRINCESS will come. Someday I'll find true love...tale as old as time. Song as old as rhyme...
At the end of the best show ever, when the fireworks go off, I take my sweet lady in my arms and kiss her. My lips pressed against her soft full lips, our tongues touching, stroking lightly. Nothing crazy because we're still at Disneyland, of course. I break away from our kiss, out of breath and more in love with Abby than ever before — maybe it's because it's her birthday or maybe because we're at Disneyland, the happiest and most magical place on earth but my fears of spending the rest of my life with Abby — as my wife are gone.
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. The thrilling spectacle of Fantasmic would like to thank you for your attendance tonight and to greet Abby Ricci the happiest of birthdays, hoping you had the most magical time at the happiest place on earth," the announcer says for hundreds and hundreds of park goers.
"OHMYGOD!" Abby exasperates, covering her face with both hands, even through them we could all see her blushing. The five of us start a chorus of "happy birthday" to my favorite birthday girl in the world.
"Oh my god, you guys, thank you but seriously that was too fucking much," burying her face in my chest.
"I love you, endlessly, munch! Happy birthday," I kiss her on the head since her face is still covered.
"Oh, Olivia, here's the things you requested!" Brandi said excitedly right before we parted ways. "Oh wow! That was so fast! Thank you!!" I give her a big hug and she looks like she just about died. "Anything for you! Always! We love you at the park!" She finally is able to say after I release her from the hug. Jeff and Abby pretend to cough while saying "royalty" making me roll my eyes.
"Be nice to me!" I warn them all turning to face them. "Or I won't give you these!" In my hand I held up six annual passes for my friends and I. It was time to come back, just because Lucas wasn't in my life anymore doesn't mean I shouldn't get to enjoy things we used to together. "Black out day free, anytime we want and always with the friendliest of cast members here to guide us!" I explain handing them each a card with Mickey and friends on it.
"Oh my god! This is fucking awesome!!!!!" Angie just about loses her goddamn mind.
Abby looks up at me, stands on her tiptoes and whispers into a kiss, "best birthday with the best girlfriend ever!"
I'm going to marry Abigail Ricci. I know it.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
"Brenda! Can you come in here please?" I beckon for my office manager and she purposefully walks into my office iPad, notebook, and pen in hand — ready for whatever it is I have to throw at her. "What's up?" She asks in a chipper disposition. "You know I'm going out of town for a few days. What do we have coming up that may interrupt my plans or anything that needs to get done before I leave that I can't do from the Hamptons?" I ask, with my eyes on my computer, answering an email before having her sit down in the chair in front of me.
"Angie and I can manage majority of what goes on in the office, I don't really foresee anything going wrong or anything that may need your direct attention. Only thing is pilot season is in full effect and you have some shows lined up that you may want to shop while in New York but I know you're going for Abby's birthday," Brenda explains confidently, scrolling through her iPad at the schedule for the next week and a half.
"Are you absolutely positive? I know you guys have become more than capable and self-sufficient — I trust our team completely to handle anything and everything in my absence. But, Murphy's Law," I cock my head knowing there's always a chance things can go wrong.
"I'm not making any promises but I'm going to do my best to make sure nothing goes wrong?" Brenda smiles with a change in pitch in her voice, making me laugh. God, I love my office and my entire team!
I wrap a meeting in my office with a studio rep regarding one of my shows I'm pitching for pilot season. Half the appeal of any show DSMN Productions works on is me and my name. I don't want that to be the only reason a show gets picked up and I don't want it to be the only reason anyone bothers watching it.
After the reps leave I kick off my heels and get back up stairs to the studio where my band has just been jamming out. We've spent the entire summer figuring out what we want our sound to be, we're obviously leaning towards pop but that still doesn't sound like us. "Honestly, we were all classically trained, at a drop of a dime we can play Bach, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky...everyone. We can write a symphony putting all of our sonatas together," I rant while sitting behind the shiny black baby grand piano from Marvin Hamlisch, the same one he had sent to me after he heard me play ONE song. My life is unbelievable, I drift off thinking.
"But! That's not going to sell records or please the masses. It could also ruin our careers because we wouldn't exactly be welcomed into the symphony community," Julia finishes my rant with her own, while plucking the strings of her violin. "We've been trying for three months to figure out our sound and come up with a radio ready song. Why is this so hard?" Nathan slams all ten fingers on the keys of the upright against one of the brick walls a few feet away from me.
"Pop Goes Classical!!" Fabian says like a light bulb just went off above his head and we all look at him sitting at the drum set with the two drumsticks in his hands up in the air. "What?" I ask him with a quizzical look on my face.
"I mean, there's that whole genre of music that classical instruments and artists do their take on pop, top 40 songs! Like the stuff we play during our jam sessions! That's our sound!" Fabian stands kicking over the symbols from excitement. "That's our sound! We've been trying for months to mold ourselves into something none of us will ever be together when our sound has been right there this whole fucking time! Every single one of our jam session is our sound!!!! It's us in a nutshell!" He's bouncing off the walls with pure and genuine excitement! It's like Fabian is vibrating!
"OHMYFUCKING GOD!"
"HOLY shiT!"
"FABIAN!!!!"
We all run to a respective instrument we can play, "Don't Stop Me Now??" Julia asks standing with her violin at the ready in front of a mic. The five of us look at one another, adjusting our mics and Nathan starts, "Tonight, I'm gonna have myself a real good time..."
"MUNCH!!!! WE FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT! WE HAD LIKE SOME SORT OF BREAKTHROUGH!! ABBY!!! BABE!!! IT'S LIKE IT JUST HIT FABIAN! IT WAS RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSES ALL ALONG!!" I shout throughout the house, running around to find Abby who was in the pantry getting dinner ready. "What are you yelling about?" She giggles as I scoop her up and spin her around with a big whissssh!
"WE FIGURED OUT OUR SOUND!!! POP GOES CLASSICAL! OR CLASSICAL GOES POP!!! OH MY GOD, BABY YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE!!! ALL OUR JAM SESSIONS WHERE WE DID A CLASSICAL TAKE ON TOP 40 SONGS! THAT'S US!!!" I shout, unfortunately in my sweet lady's ear because she's covering them with both hands. I set her on the counter of the kitchen island, huffing and puffing because I am completely out of breath but I crash my lips into Abby's anyways, kissing her passionately and excitedly! Ready to celebrate because it's like this moment was a sign that this is going to work with the band!
I finally calm down enough to help Abby with dinner and feed the dogs, I almost completely forgot about my birthday surprise for my sweet, sweet lady!
"Oh my god!! I'm so stupid!" I hiss to myself. "Huh?" Abby scrunches up her nose. I get up from my seat at the dinner table and sit myself onto Abby's lap. We're both in short distressed jean shorts and our thighs are pressed against one another, warm from the summer weather. "Mmm, I missed you today, my little moguel," Abby smiled brightly looking up at me, her arms wrapped around my waist. "I missed you too, my spicy lady," I chuckle wiping the bit of sauce on the corner of her lips with my thumb. "I have a birthday surprise for you that requires your attention, ASAP!"
"What is it? You already got me Disneyland, babe," she squeezed my waist tightly. "We're going on a little trip," I raise my brows after just a tiny tease. "No we're not. You have a work thing this weekend..." she shakes her head in disbelief clucking her tongue. "Mmmm...the work thing is your special trip! We're going to the Hamptons, munch! A long weekend at the beach! Sun, sand, fresh air...your parents!!" I smile hoping that Abby is pleased with this mini vacation, gritting my teeth waiting for some sort of reaction.
"Oh my god! Seriously?? YEAH!!! Baby!!!" She shrieked very loudly in my ear probably payback for earlier. There's a ringing in my left ear...
"Oh my god... good," I chuckle in relief. "We're taking the red eye. The plane will be ready around 2 AM," I stand up, peeling our warm sticky thighs apart. "TONIGHT? OLIVIA!" A bit of panic clearly washes over her. "Abby, it's only 8 PM, we have six hours to pack for four days at the beach, I don't think it'll be a problem," I convince her.
"TONIGHT? OLIVIA! I can't with you!" She laughs standing on her tiptoes to kiss me firmly. "Eh, it's your birthday, thought we'd go to one of your favorite places, in the world," I shrug.
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
"We're not getting on a fucking helicopter to get to the Hamptons when we can get in my parents car and drive there. You're fucking nuts!" Abby wags her index finger back and forth in front of my face...up and down, now she's jabbing it straight into my sternum. God, she's adorable when she's mad, her cheeks are flush red with anger and heat. Her sunglasses pulling her hair out of her face as it sits on top of her head. God, help me, I'm so in love with this woman!
"ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME, OLIVIA?? YOU'RE JUST STANDING THERE WITH THAT STUPID DUMB SMILE ON YOUR FACE! OLIVIA NICOLE!" She's still shouting in her parent's hallway at me. But I couldn't care less because as she's yelling I'm having an engagement ring custom made for her — it's the perfect embodiment of Abigail Ricci.
"But..." I can't even get a word in between her yelling and poking me in the chest with her cute little finger that can be the source of the most pleasurable, euphoric experience of my life. "BUT NOTHING OLIVIA! YOU'RE LITERALLY SHOWING OFF NOW! WE GET IT YOU HAVE YOUR COMPANY AND YOUR LABEL BLAH BLAH BUT YOU'RE STILL YOUR AVERAGE 25 YEAR OLD!!" She continues to wail at me. At least she isn't throwing anything at me...I'm sure if she could she'd rip these photos of herself off the walls and toss them at me, but she wouldn't risk damaging her own photo.
"Are you done?" I say quietly while she takes a breath in preparation for berating me more about our means of transportation. She's just about to continue with a gasp of air when I kiss her open mouth making a hollow kiss sound to shut her up long enough to tell her, "I didn't pay for this helicopter, it's a loan from the label. So, no money spent. Zero. There's also a car waiting to take the four of us to the helipad now and a car waiting to take us to the house so if you don't mind?" I spin her around and push her out the door where her parents are waiting to lock up their house for the weekend. Finally...she's quiet. That definitely shut her up.
"I've never ridden in a helicopter before," Marc and Eve cried out with excitement as we strap up and slip on the headsets to talk to one another. "I'm not the biggest fan of helicopters," I grit my teeth looking out the window that surrounded us, making sure my seatbelt is clicked in securely. "What? Why?" Abby yells over the whopping of the helicopter blades spinning above us. "Too many windows to fall out of!" I bellow over the noise.
It's about a 45 minute ride from the city to the beach — 45 minutes of fear of falling out of the helicopter, even though it's highly unlikely and I'm trying my best not to show it. Of course, Abby can read me like a book and has yet to remove her hand from the nape of my neck where she's drawing circles and lightly scratching my head, soothing me completely. My mind drifts as Abby and her parents gush over the view of the coast.
What if she says no? How would I ask her? When would I ask her? Is she ready? I want nothing more than to call Abby my wife and have kids with her. She would make the cutest babies, with her Italian genes, my god. I really want a son, if she'd let us, I honestly would love to name him Monty — middle name or first. He was such a driving force for our relationship, I'm not saying if he didn't die I would never be with her but she's so sure that he somehow sent me to her and I believe her. He was my friend too. I wish I could somehow get his blessing. Oh my god, blessing! Her parents...would they give me their blessing to marry their only daughter?
What about my parents...? My dad? I don't know...can I get married and finally move on to the next season of my life if I don't have their blessing? Can I move on and marry the woman of my dreams without my dad? In order for me to go on with my life...I have to let go of part of it. How is that fair? How is any of this fair? How can I find the absolute love of my life, the one person I need to spend the rest of my life with but have to let go of one of the first people in my life that showed me love?
A tear escapes my eye and quickly I wipe it away without drawing attention. Abby's still caressing and soothing the back of my neck while looking out one of the many windows, I lean my head on her shoulder and close my eyes — completely torn on the inside. Abby is my future but my dad is my past...
I open my eyes as we descend down, the Ricci's thought I had fallen asleep but I was just drowning in my own thoughts. I think about how this is going to affect my depression and I know as soon as I get the chance I should call Candice.
"You okay, Olivia?" Marc asks as we load the car with or weekend bags. I drop my work bag filled with tons of things I need to look over, sign, my laptop, and iPad.
"Yeah, guess I was just getting motion sickness during the ride," I lie, letting out a tiny smile hoping to convince the man, who, in almost two years of dating his daughter has become the father figure I've always dreamed about having — he was everything I needed that my dad wasn't.
"Let's get in the car, huh? Get you some water and fresh air with the windows down to the house," he leads me into the car where Eve and Abby are waiting for us. Abby's parents have had this amazing house in the Hamptons since Marc sold his dress shop in New Jersey to open his deli/bodega in the city under their house so that Abby could act full time without them commuting from Jersey to Manhattan.
The house is beautiful, I've only been once, but I know it's Abby's favorite place in the entire world. It's right on the water! I've always dreamt of owning a house like this — a little beach cottage with the ocean and sand as my backyard.
"Why don't you take a nap, babe? My parents and I can go to the grocery store and buy food and whatever else we need for the weekend," Abby sits on the arm of the wooden chaise I was sitting in, watching the waves crash and listening to the sound of the family next door playing in the sand. "No, I'll come," I reply looking up at my lady who is running her fingers through my hair.
"We'll only be gone about an hour, don't worry."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure we can manage, baby," she smirks. "Do you want anything?" She stands up, bending over in front of me so she can put her hair in a bun.
"Mmm...sweets!" I bubble.
"Of course," she giggles, placing a wet sloppy kiss on my lips. "We'll be back, love you!"
"Bye, munch!"
"We'll be back, Liv!" Eve shouted from the front door.
When I hear the car leave the driveway, I pull out my phone and call Candice.
"Hello?" Candice answered.
"Hi, Candice, it's me, Olivia."
"Hi, how are you?"
"I've been better."
"Wanna talk about it?"
"You have time?"
"I do."
"It's Abby's birthday week. We went to Disneyland the other day and I don't know what it was, maybe it was because it was her birthday or because we were at Disneyland and I have all these sentimental memories attached to that place. But it's like all my fears of marriage and spending the rest of my life with Abby just disappeared. I was...am so, so, so sure of spending the rest of my life with her. There isn't a doubt in my mind..." I pause.
"Olivia?"
"But...on our way to the Hamptons I just...I was thinking about everything like how and when I would ask her and I was so excited. Then I got to thinking about asking her parents for their blessing and whether or not they would say yes. Which lead me to my parents..."
"Mmm..."
"My dad isn't going to budge. Abby's parents saw it for themselves. He's too stuck in his ways or whatever his reasoning is. But can I really move on and start a new season of my life without my father in it? It's like I have to lose that part of my life just to keep and gain Abby. It isn't fair..." I begin to cry.
"I can see how torn your must feel, Olivia. Pitting your future against your past is tough. It mustn't be easy. You can't assume that your family — your father would say no. Maybe the notion of marriage is just what he might need to nudge him in the direction you want him to go in."
"We can't even talk to each other without yelling and screaming, how am I supposed to tell him that I'm having an engagement ring made as we speak? How do I ask him for his blessing? It isn't fair...it's not f-fair," I weep into my hand, trying to muffle the sound of my cries from the perfect family next door.
"You try and try again. If he says no and says the most terrible things in the world to you, at least you can live the rest of your life knowing you tried — as terrible as that advice is...I've known you for some time, Olivia. You would regret it very much, and dwell on it for a very long time, if you didn't at least try. You also can't stop living your life based on someone else's opinion — even if that someone is your father. You need to live your life."
"There's just so much loyalty and devotion that's been instilled in me because of my culture — Filipinos, we take care of our elders, our parents. We do everything we can for them, when we're older it's our job to take care of them."
"I understand that, Olivia. You've been avoiding talking to him about your relationship for almost two years..."
"Yeah and he still hasn't budged! TWO YEARS! AND THINGS HAVE ONLY GOTTEN WORSE!" I shout in frustration, pacing back and forth on the deck.
"Do you want to cut all ties with your father? You mentioned it during a prior conversation..."
"I don't know...the loyalty thing is what stops me every single time. Just like how I said I would never go to their house if he was there yet I'm there almost every day to see my mom and brother, we just ignore each other."
"It sounds like in the last two years your relationship with your father has become...almost non-existent."
"It has..." I settle down and sit back in the chaise, wiping my face in the rim of my shirt. Sniffling.
"From what I've been seeming, Olivia, as much as you want to take the next step with Abby, you can't move forward until you resolve this with your family. You just can't. You'll never be truly happy until you do."
"Thanks, Candice."
"Anytime...seriously, Olivia. Day or night. Good luck."
"Thanks, bye."
I hang up the phone and lean the chaise back, the sun was shining brightly, beating down on my face. I can feel the tan soaking in already and decide to go inside and unpack or get a snack. A snack sounds good. I have popcorn in my bag, yes.
I sit quietly looking out the door to the ocean, it must be a Pisces thing but I am never more at peace than when I'm by the water. Despite this internal push and pull between what I think is right and what I feel, I'm actually okay.
I take it upon myself to walk around the Ricci Hampton household, there's photos of the little family sprinkled throughout the house, but one in particular catches my eye. It's of Marc and Eve holding Eve's pregnant stomach, little did they know they would raise this amazing force of nature that has turned my entire life upside down in the best possible way and would be gifted with the most amazing voice. God, that voice of hers.
I hold up the picture in the brown frame that has seen many years. I wish my family weren't as dysfunctional as it was just because it feels so nice to be in a family that doesn't argue and fight all. The. Time.
My family wasn't always like this, at least I was spared from seeing that it was by my Grandma...I always called her my savior. She saved me from the fights with my mom, the fights my mom and dad would have...she just did what a grandmother was supposed to. But when she passed away, there wasn't anyone there to shelter me from it anymore and I saw it all. I saw what she hid me from...the dysfunction.
I sigh deeply and head to our bedroom for the weekend and unpack.
"Baby! We're back!! I got you ice cream and some cookies!" Abby shouts and I hear her and her parents bustling in with the arms full of groceries. "Cookies???" I ask with eyes wide, ready to eat. "You can have some after some real food, brunch?" Abby asks kissing me on the cheek.
"Sounds good, what can I do to help?" I ask taking various types of foods out of the paper bags. "Peel!" Marc directs, pushing a bag of potatoes in front of me. "Gotcha! But you know, I can actually cook. My mom was a caterer. It's in my blood," I scoff. "Potatoes first then you can work on the eggs Benedict a la Marc with me," Marc gleams from the other side of the kitchen and it absolutely warms my heart. He's such a kind, loving man, an excellent father.
"Mom was thinking of a barbecue on Saturday! Tomorrow we can go into town and you can try all the like must-see restaurants and stuff," Abby says chopping veggies for the salad. "Yeah, babe, whatever you wanna do! It's your birthday!" I tease. "Ugh! You've never been here during the summer! There's so many things I wanna show you!" She says with glee, it's hard not to smile as brightly as she is.
"How are you able to miss work like this Olivia? If you don't mind me asking, I just assume starting a new company you would need to be there to oversee everything," Marc asks taking the potatoes I've finished peeling.
"I have Angie there and Brenda my office manager who Angie and I trained extensively, even before the office was up and ready she was learning with us. I trust my team, they're pretty self-sufficient. I'm always just an email, text, phone call, FaceTime away," I nod confidently moving over to the fruits Eve asked me to wash and chop.
"What are you working on right now?" Eve asks washing dishes. "Its pilot season, so we're shopping a lot of scripts around to networks and studios to see if they'll pick any up and put into production. Not to mention we have DSMN coming up in three months."
"Oh my goodness, I didn't realize how soon it is! Is everything going okay with the new location?"
"Oh my god, mom you have to see the designs for the stage and the seating! It's the coolest thing I've ever seen! It's on the backlot of Universal and the seating for VIP are in the facadęs!"
"What? How?"
"It's buildings, like the streets of New York and whatnot and through the windows, they've built kind of like opera box seats," I explain. "So we're surrounded by the fake buildings but within the fake buildings are seats that people can watch from."
"We have seats up there, right?" Marc raises a brow.
"Of course, backstage too and on the floor if you want," I laugh.
"The production value has skyrotted from the first show! Can't believe I've been to every single one!"
"And you've only sang at two of them?"
"It's too glitz and glamour and The Who's who of Hollywood, babe."
"Nah, I have everyone on the show from viral YouTube sensations to...Idina Menzel to Beyoncé."
"Exactly," Abby scoffs at me.
"She's performing this year though," Eve restates.
"I was forced! She practically forged my signature!" Abby exaggerated.
"So...you don't wanna do the show?" I cock my head to the right wondering if she really didn't want to do the show and if I really just forced her into it.
"I do...I just...I'm self-conscious about it, I guess," Abby replies quietly, pretending to whisk the salad dressing.
"Babe...I'll be right there with you," I smile at my beautiful girl warmly.
After brunch I ask Abby if she wants to go for a walk with me. We walk east passing the perfect little family of four next door, who are inside their home watching an animated movie that Abby is convinced is my Disney voice over movie and that I should knock on the door and surprise the kids.
We walk together, side by side. My fingers intertwined with hers, my face nuzzled into her arm. I want nothing more than to confess everything to Abby but I don't...instead I keep it all inside and try to ignore the internal struggle I'm having. Sand through our toes, the sun beaming down on my beautiful olive skinned girlfriend, "what do you wanna do the rest of the day?" She asks, pulling me into the water up to my knees.
"I don't know, what do you have in mind, birthday girl? Or what about your parents, maybe they have plans for today?" I shrug following her into the water, looking out into the open sea. The waters are calm and steady making me feel just the same. I'm not saying I want to go through this alone, but I don't want Abby to have to deal with my family's problems.
"Ohhh! We should stay in, watch a movie or do a game night or something!!" Abby gasps with excitement. "Yeah! That sounds fun but you need to promise not to go all Monica Gellar on everyone, munch," I warn, pulling her closer to me swinging our arms back and forth with the waves crashing against our ankles.
"IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE THAT!" Abby yells defensively. I stare at her wide eyes like that answer was exactly what I was talking about. Abby always likes to have the last word, she's ambitiously competitive, it's become one of her traits that I've recently discovered from the girlfriend standpoint and when she's not competing in a almost psychotic way with me during games, it's an absolute turn on.
"Alright, a hundred bucks and a massage every day for a month says that you'll go full on Monica Gellar tonight," I stop walking and stand directly in front of her with a smirk and a hand ready to be shook agreeing to the bet. She looks at me with a raised brow, "deal!" She grabs my hand, shaking it and pulling me into a kiss to seal the deal. "Better get your wallet ready, Riviera. I want my hundred dollars in singles," she bites my lower lips with their lips as we kiss. We stand in the water a while longer because I know these types of kisses from Abby, they're the ones that kiss and expect to be kissed back over and over again and you don't say no to these types of kisses — EVER.
"What should we play tonight? We have Trivial Pursuit, Jenga, Monopoly, a deck of cards..." Abby lists the games in the cabinet beer the TV. "I'm pretty sure the pieces are missing from Monopoly and Trivial Pursuit," Eve says bringing four glasses of wine and two bottles with her to the living room where we've lit a fireplace for this brisk summer night. "Oh...well that leaves Jenga, cards, and Life..." I say crawling on all fours on the floor next to Abby. "Let's play Life! We haven't played that in YEARS!" Marc requests, sitting on one side of the rustic coffee table with a bowl of popcorn in front of him.
The game is drawing to a close and Abby is clearly dead last, she's lost almost everything and keeps getting expenses added to her life, out of pity I've tried to donate a bunch of money to her but she says that voids the bet we made on the beach. I'm hysterically laughing because every turn she takes some sort of shit show happens and she gets screwed in this game of life even more. It all started when her car rolled off a hill! I'm almost at the finish line when I whisper smugly into my lady's ear, "I also would like my hundred dollars in singles."
"Fuck you!" She hisses. "The game isn't over it!! We still have to count up our money and everything!" She says thinking there is still a chance for her to win.
"BEST TWO OUT OF THREE!" Abby screams after me as I laugh my way into the kitchen to help clean up our game night snacks and drinks.
"No! That game took us three hours to finish! I don't plan on staying up another three hours, MONICA!" I chortle.
"WE DON'T HAVE TO PLAY LIFE! I'LL PLAY YOU AT JENGA! OR CARDS!" She insists.
"No! One game and we're done! Jenga and cards after our match wasn't in the bet!" I cockily sing. Sinking into the couch, watching sappy deal out cards on the coffee table on her knees. "What are you guys talking about?" Marc asks us standing behind me on the couch. "I made a bet with your daughter that she couldn't help but go full on Monica Gellar during game night tonight," I snicker.
"That's an easy bet to make, wish I joined in on that," Marc teases my girlfriend which gets him a pillow to the face. Good to see Abby's throwing habit isn't reserve just for me.
"On that note...goodnight, girls," Marc kisses me on the head goodnight, then his daughter and follows his wife to bed.
"Come on, babe. One game!" Abby continues to challenge me.
"No way, I'm going to bed too, munch," I yawn and walk to our bedroom, leaving Abby and her deck of cards in the living room. I shuffle along the hallway and into our bedroom. Just as I'm about to change into my pajamas that Abby's sneaky hands will probably try and take off in my sleep, there's a knock at my door, "come in," I reply to the knock, sitting on the foot of the bed.
"I just wanted to make sure you have enough pillows and blankets," Eve comes in quietly with her hands full with extra pillows and blankets. "Oh, uhm, I think we should be okay. Abby's kind of like a heater at night," I tell her looking around on the bed that seemed to have enough pillows and blankets for the two of us.
"Well, it gets a little chilly here at night so just in case I'll leave these here for you two," Eve gently place the stack of pillows and quilts on the bay window of our room. "Olivia, I don't think I ever apologized for interfering with your parents...it's been bothering me so much that I hadn't told you how sorry I was for overstepping," Eve said sitting next to me on the edge of the bed, placing her hand on top of my left hand.
"You just wanted to help. I was never upset about it," I smile and shake my head at Eve. "I didn't get to thank you for trying to help."
"We just wanted to see, maybe if he heard it from another set of parents who went through the same thing, it would help him better understand things," Eve explained, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and resting my head on her shoulder, this gesture — I don't know what it is but it warms my heart so much that tears can't help by escape from my eyes. "I'll never understand why but I have to accept it, even if he won't," I tell her.
The door to our bedroom swings open to Abby whining about how cold her feet are, "oh...sorry...I didn't know..." she stuttered, embarrassed that she may have interrupted something between her mom and I. "No, I was just leaving, good night, honey," Eve says kissing me on the head and walking out the door, putting a hand on her daughter's shoulder.
"I'm so fucking full..." I cry out, dropping my white cloth napkin on my empty plate. We just ate our weight in seafood at a local restaurant in the main part of town. "I feel like I need to walk home from all the food I just ate," Marc groans leaning back in his seat, rubbing his very full stomach.
After a bit of arguing with Abby, I pick up the tab for our seafood lunch, we spend the rest of the afternoon exploring the city and all of the Ricci's favorite places. They have so many memories here, every summer since Abby was a young teenager they spent here, even some Christmases were spent here. "I've never spent Christmas at a snowy beach," I tell the family while strolling the streets. "Oh, you have to come! Maybe we should do Christmas here this year!" Marc says excitedly with his wife in hand in front of us.
"That'd be really awesome! I'd like that," I smile brightly, feeling like I'm settling in to the Ricci family.
"So, what's for dinner?" Marc asks at a crosswalk and all three of us groan loudly because it's only been an hour since our lunch.
Abby, Eve, and I do some light shopping aka we had to make two trips to the car to drop off our shopping bags. "Let's go, in there," Abby points to a boutique across the street. "I'll follow you in, I have to take this call," I let got of Abby's hand and pick up Angie's call.
"What do you mean Universal is backing out of the deal for DSMN?? ITS THREE MONTHS FROM NOW! CAN THEY EVEN DO THAT? ISNTTHATBREACHOFCONTRACT??" I blurt out in panic, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk in front the of the store.
"WHEN DID YOU FIND OUT? WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO, ANGIE??" I'm on the verge of tears, my hands running through my hair ready to pull.
"No, no! I'll talk to Abby and I'll call you back. I'll see how soon I can get out there. Hopefully by Monday morning so we can take care of this. Oh my god...I can't believe this is fucking happening. Stop! Don't! Because if you start....UGH! NO! I'M GONNA HANDLE IT! I'M GONNA HANDLE IT, ANGIE! Just see keep doing what you can and keep me updated. Get everyone on the team working on it. Okay. Tell them I'm gonna take care it. Thanks, bye," I inhale deeply stopping my tears. I look in through the store window at Abby and Eve looking at a summer dress that would look great against Abby's complexion.
I take a deep breath, wipe the tears off my face, and talk into the store with a forced smile on my face. How do I tell Abby that I need to leave this family trip for her birthday that I planned because of work?
It's like Abby knows me because the rest of the afternoon she leaves me to my thoughts and I can tell she's impatiently waiting for me to tell her when I'm ready.
"Munch, come here, I need to talk to you," I tell my tiny brunette, when we walk through the doors of their Hamptons cottage. She follows, we each have several shopping bags in hand, setting them down by the closet. "What's wrong? Something's been bothering you since you took that phone call, who called you?" Abby asks, calling me out.
"It was Angie...there was a problem at the office," I say sitting Abby down on the bed, pushing away the pillows and kicking the bags further away from reach. "They've been working on it the last two days thinking they could handle it but...they can't. Universal is attempting to withdrawal from the DSMN concert," I explain.
"WHAT? They can't do that can they?"
"I don't know, that's what Angie and the team are trying to figure out but this is a multi-billion dollar company we're up against."
"What are you gonna do?" Abby asks worried for the concert that's 3 months away. We've already sold out. I don't even know what we're going to do. I said I'd handle it but I haven't the slightest idea how to.
"I need to get back to LA, ASAP. I can get on a helicopter to the city in a couple hours and have a plane ready by the time I get there, I'll be there early Sunday morning."
"So, you wanna leave. Tonight," Abby scoffs pulling away from me. "You can leave tomorrow night and be there Monday morning!"
"Abby...I need time to figure out what-"
"You planned this! You planned this entire weekend with my parents here in the Hamptons only to leave early?"
"Abby, I have to go! This is MY concert event! I have to handle this! I have to be the one to take care things! No one else!" I get up following Abby, frustrated at her reaction. "I know you're upset that I have to leave this trip early and I am SO sorry, munch! I am! But this is important to me and my company, it could ruin all the years I've work towards building it up."
"This is you choosing your work over your personal life, Olivia. You are choosing to leave in a matter of hours rather than tomorrow. You need to be there Monday but want to...ugh. Never mind," Abby shakes her head in disgust — in disappointment and my stomach is instantly in knots and guilt washes over me.
It's ice town in Abby land and there's no trying to convince her otherwise now...she skipped past throwing things at me and went straight to the cold shoulder. I sit myself on the bed and cradle my head in my hands, my elbows resting on my knees, and the palms of my hands rubbing my eyes deeply. I groan loudly. There's no convincing Abby right now and there's no convincing me to stay. I need to be in LA — NOW. So much is at stake. The concert, my concert's reputation, millions of dollars...
I get up off the bed, look back at Abby as I exit our room to tell Abby's parents about my sudden change in plans because I'm getting on the chopper to the city and on that jet at 7 PM.
"Munch, please..." I plead with her once more, trying to coax her out of ice town as the four of us silently and awkwardly eat dinner together.
"Abigail," Eve says her daughter's name firmly, trying to help me get her attention. "Yeah, mom?" She looks up, answering pleasantly. "Olivia-" she starts to say, "I'm going to get more wine, you want some more, dad?" She interrupts. Great.
After an ice cold, frozen dinner Abby stomps her way into the bedroom, slamming the door loudly behind her. But seconds later we all hear the door open again followed by two loud thud, I peek into the hallway to find that Abby has thrown my bags out of the bedroom. You gotta be fucking kidding me.
I help finish cleaning up after dinner with Marc and Eve, excusing myself to sit out on the deck. I have about an hour and half before Marc drops me off. "Do you wanna talk, honey? Because she obviously doesn't..." Marc asks standing behind my seat also looking out into the ocean. "I know she's mad but she's not even trying to be understanding of this situation, sir. I know I'm partly wrong...but so is she. I know it," I reply quietly.
"She thinks you're picking your career over her...again but you're right, she's not being understanding of the situation. This is a big deal and she's being selfish. It's only child syndrome, Olivia, we're probably to blame for that. She wants what she wants, when she wants it and she gets it almost every single time," Marc chuckles and I scoff as well because holy shit is he right about Abby and her only child syndrome.
"I'm good at what I do, sir. I'm an excellent business woman, pianist, songwriter, singer. I'm good at DSMN. I don't normally boast and I don't like to draw too much attention to all that, but what I really want to do with my life — what I want to do for a living — is I want to be with your daughter. I'm learning to be good at it...and I want to spend the rest of my life trying to," my girlfriend's father who has courageously taken on the role of being a father figure to me, sits down in front of me on the foot rest of the chaise I'm sitting in, intently listening to me.
"I...I'm having a ring made for her. To ask her to marry me," I look into Marc's eyes, he has her eyes and I feel safe telling him this. "I don't know when or how but I know I am. I'm sorry you're finding out like this, I had a plan to ask you and Eve — the right way. She's your only daughter. I was going to do it the right way, it just slipped out...I'm sorry," I begin to apologize profusely for royally screwing up this whole thing.
I try to utter another "I'm sorry" to Marc but he hushes me and wraps me in a big, warm hug. His hugs are the best, they're like a warm blanket after being cold for so long or putting on clothes straight for the dryer. "Your secret is safe with me and you absolutely have my blessing. There is no one that lights up my daughter's world and makes it better than you do. You push her, encourage even more drive and ambition out of her. She's a better person now, living her truth, because of you. I love you, Olivia and I know she loves you!" Marc's eyes well up with tears and they fall out of the corners of his eyes.
"I'm going to ask you the right way, I promise! This isn't it!" I chuckle wiping away my tears.
I knock on the door of Abby's ice fortress and let myself in even though there was no response. She's sitting in bed watching TV with an angry look on her face. I cautiously make my way in, not knowing whether I should sit or stand. I opt on kneeling on the bed with my left knee. "Your dad is dropping me off now, I gotta go, munch. I really am sorry about this...I know you hate me right now and you think I'm choosing my work over you..." I place my hand on her leg and she glares at me with her piercing brown eyes, making me take my hand off her leg. "...it probably does look like I'm choosing work over you, but I'm not. If I had a choice...if I could solve all of this with an email I would have already sent it and stayed here with you as planned. But that didn't happen and I am...terribly, terribly sorry for that. I love YOU and I will love you endlessly," I sniffle, leaning in to kiss her goodbye but she turns away, without a word, not letting me kiss her goodbye or wanting to say goodbye to me.
Ugh. Is she fucking serious? I'm gettin on a helicopter and a plane and she's not even going to say goodbye? Not even going to look me in the eye before I leave?? This breaks my heart because since we started dating there isn't a flight or a car ride that we get on without a kiss and "I love you" because of what happen with Monty. It's something I got used to and started looking forward to and needing before I take off, so for her to withhold that and take it away breaks my heart...
"Fine...I'm leaving. I'm done trying to convince you of anything else. Bye, Abby," I scoff, shaking my head in frustration and hurt, slamming the door of her ice fortress on my way out.
"Everything okay?" Marc asks me during the quiet ride to the helipad. "I'm getting on a helicopter and a plane for a rushed flight to LA, I know she's not happy about it but she wouldn't even say goodbye, Marc. She didn't even want to look me in the eye! I'm getting on a plane and she didn't say goodbye," I choke.
"Ugh...I'll talk to her. She knows better," Marc shakes his head, gripping the steering wheel.
Marc hands me my bags and wraps me in another warm hug. "The helicopter and the car is still set to pick you guys up and take you back to the city, no worries, okay? Thank you for everything. I'm really so-" Marc cuts me off before I can say the S word again, "enough apologizing, you don't need to apologize for this! Eve and I understand and Abby will come around, I'll make sure of it," he teases, loosening his grip around me and pushing me towards the helicopter waiting for me to take off.
\/\/\/\/\/\/
I'm sitting in my office in absolute relief that we were able to resolve the issue with Universal and the venue. We sat in my conference room with lawyers upon lawyers for over seven hours on Monday. HOURS of back and forth and negotiating. When I started my company I knew I'd be doing things similar to this but I didn't think it would be seven hours of trying to fight with lawyers — this is my life now. This isn't what I expected when I went into this I industry to sing and play the piano and act in TV and movies.
I'm super emotional from today, I don't know if it's from happiness that everything worked out or everything that happen this weekend at the Hamptons, I haven't been able to fully think about what's going on with Abby and I until this moment — it's still radio silence from her and from me.
With both feet up on my desk and my dogs making myself comfortable around me, Amy buzzes me from the front desk, "Olivia, uhm Abby is here...she wanted me to buzz you first..." she said skeptically and I roll my head around to see out the one way window in my office to see into the check-in to see if my girlfriend was really in my office waiting room.
Yeaup, there she was, in all her icy glory, except she didn't look icy. Not right now...she's standing at the front desk in the same plane outfit she left in when we left for New York, did she just get back? I check the time on my computer, it's 6:37 PM and the entire team is getting ready to go home after what probably felt like the longest day of work for them waiting to find out if DSMN was still on. Did she just land? Why would she come straight here after the fight we just had?
Currently, I resent her for how we left things — how she let me leave things. I'm upset with her for not at all understanding the severity of what I was going through. Two days we hadn't spoken. I spoke to her mom and dad more than her in these last two and a half days. I just negotiated my way through losing my project baby, my two night charity concert that I've built from the ground up and all I wanted to do was tell her what I had been able to do in seven hours, but I was too mad to call.
I buzz Amy back, "can you tell her I'm still in a meeting, please? Thanks." I get up to close my office door for as much privacy as possible and lay on the couch across from my desk, covering my face with a throw pillow half trying to smother myself. From my desk I can hear a repetitive buzzing — over and over again. I throw the pillow off my face and drag my feet to see why my phone is buzzing, before I even get to my desk I can see from the photo flashing it's Abby. My head snaps to the window, it's a one way window so she doesn't see me staring and avoiding her. I ignore the first call but two more follow it right after. After another attempt, I get a text message from her, "Please let me in." I roll my eyes because it wasn't even 48 hours ago where I was basically asking her to do the same thing.
Why does she always play unfair?
I stare at my phone, "Why?" I reply. Before I can even sit and go back to attempting to smother myself with a throw pillow I can hear murmurs outside my door, the voices turn out to be Amy and Abby, "No, but Abby she's in a meeting!! You can't go in right now!!" My receptionists rambles while physically trying to block Abby who is clearly on a mission to get into my office from the sound of it. "No, it's fine, Amy!" I hear her pushing.
My office door swings open with Abby barging in, hands on her hips, lips pressed so firmly together they're almost white, and eyes as dark as night staring at me. "Olivia, I tried to-" Amy tries to explain at the door, while my hands are on my neck trying to rub all the tension out. "It's alright, Amy, she's already made her way in," I exhale.
I wait for Amy to shut the door, "I don't wanna do this right now, Abby. I'm at work," I tell her coldly. I don't bother to get up and she's still standing over me still upset. "No. You don't get to be mad at me," she barks, raising her voice. I look up at her almost with disgust. I raise myself to my feet, grab her by the wrist tightly and drag her from my office outside and upstairs to the studio at a very fast pace which I'm sure drew way more attention to us than necessary. Neither of us say anything until the door closely firmly behind us and I turn on the "recording" light so everyone knows not to come in.
"I DON'T GET TO BE MAD AT YOU? SINCE WHEN DO YOU GET TO DECIDE HOW I FEEL?" I bellow at the girl standing in front of me.
"BECAUSE YOU WERE THE ONE THAT LEFT ME IN THE HAMPTONS!!"
"FOR A VALID REASON!! I DIDN'T LEAVE YOU FOR A PARTY OR AN EVENT! I LEFT BECAUSE I HAD NO CHOICE!"
"YOU LEFT BECAUSE YOU CHOSE WORK!"
"DO YOU EVEN HEAR YOURSELF?? HOW SELF-CENTERED AND RIDICULOUS YOU SOUND RIGHT NOW? I LEFT BECAUSE EVERYTHING I BUILT FOR THE PAST SEVEN YEARS WOULD HAVE BEEN RUINED! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS DOWN THE DRAIN! IF YOU KNEW ME OR CARED ENOUGH ABOUT ME YOU WOULD HAVE UNDERSTOOD THE SEVERITY OF THE SITUATION, ABBY!"
"SELF-CENTERED AND RIDICULOUS?? IS THAT HOW YOU FUCKING SEE ME IN THIS RELATIONSHIP?"
"NO, BUT IT'S WHAT YOU DAMN SURE ARE SHOWING ME RIGHT NOW! ABBY, I LOVE YOU BUT I CAN'T KEEP SPARRING WITH YOU OVER THIS!" I push my way past her.
"UGGH! I DIDN'T COME STRAIGHT HERE TO FIGHT WITH YOU ABOUT WORK!" She follows me. "Don't you think I know how important this is to you? Don't you think I don't know the severity of what happen this weekend? How dare you assume that I don't know you well enough to know how much this means to you and how hard you've worked for it!" She's stopped yelling but continues to hiss at me.
"You have a great way of showing it, Abby," I reply with my back towards her, sniffling.
"I told you it was hard for me, that I'm still learning to be Olivia Riviera's girlfriend. Saturday was the first time you've had to leave me and I didn't know how to feel. I was mad but I understood...I just...was more mad than anything else at the time."
"You let me leave..."
"And I regretted it the moment I let you walk away! It was a mistake. I should have never done that! NEVER!" She turns me to face her holding onto my shoulders. "I'm sorry, baby."
She's looking into my eyes, for the first time in 48 hours I'm finally able to exhale...it's felt like I've been holding my breath the moment I got that call from Angie. Looking into Abby's eyes, I know she's sorry because I am too. I know she was angry and didn't know what else to do. "We're a work in progress..." I reply to her moving her hair behind her ears, studying every curve, every line of her face as if I didn't already have it memorized. "We are and we love each other endlessly," she says cupping my face with both hands and bringing our lips together. It's a soft, tender, and delicate kiss. It's an apologetic kiss from both of us, it's a kiss longing to be the solution to our reoccurring problem of not knowing how to exist in a relationship like this one.
"Thank you for calling me out on my shit," Abby chuckles breaking away from our kiss. "Thank you for not throwing anything at me this time," I smile brightly.