Crystal's POV
I sat in Justin's living room, with my legs spread out in front of me on his couch. My lips were still tingling from all the kissing I had just done, and my heart was still racing. It all happened so suddenly. One second I was hinting at the fact that I like him and the next, Justin's lips captured mine in the best kiss I had ever experienced. I felt something inside of me that I had never felt before; not even with Brandon, who I was "in love" with.
I don't really know how to describe what I was feeling at the time nor how I'm feeling now. It's one of those things that can only be understood if they are experienced for yourself. And god, I wish everyone could experience something as sensational and amazing and perfect as the kiss Justin and I shared.
When the whole thing was over-unfortunately-I took all the courage I could muster to admit my feelings for him. After that, I assumed he'd feel awkward because he didn't feel the same way and whatever relationship we had before would be ruined by those three words. But no, he said it back. He admitted that he liked me too and I'd be lying if I said my heart didn't pick up speed and feel like it was going to come up my throat.
On top of that, Justin went into a little speech about how he doesn't feel like he needs to be attracted to me because in a few months we'll have a baby together. That speech gave me the amount of reassurance I needed to know that everything is going to be okay.
While waiting for Justin to come down after recovering from the very heated make-out session we had just had, I was mentally preparing myself for the conversation that is about to take place.
The baby.
Although I've been waiting for us to talk about this, now that it is about happen, I don't even know what to say or where to even start. I'm not very good with conversations or people so this is difficult for me.
I already know that Justin wants to be in our child's life, so I don't need to worry about that. I'm just worried about how much he can be in our child's life. He as a busy and hectic life. I know that he'll most likely be traveling a lot because of his career. I don't want him to just come and go-even though he wouldn't be able to help it-I want him to be a full time father to our daughter or son, but I know that isn't possible unless he quits his singing career, which I will never allow to happen.
In short, things will not be easy.
I was interrupted from my thoughts and from staring into space when I heard Justin's footsteps coming down the staircase. My vision slowly came back into focus and I averted my gaze to Justin, who was now at the bottom of the stairs and heading towards the sofa I was currently laying on.
I looked up at him, "Did you fix your little problem?" I joked, smirking. He scoffed.
"Oh, trust me, it wasn't little," Justin said back. At first I didn't understand what he was saying, but a few seconds later it sunk in what he meant. My face blushed red and I buried my face in my hands.
Although it wasn't the topic of the conversation, somewhere in the back of my mind, my conscience was reminding me of how hard the whole parenting thing really is, especially how hard it'll be for me, having a celebrity as the dad and all. At all these thoughts, I suddenly felt my mood decrease. My mind was raging with worry after worry, and at any second I felt as if my head was going to explode. This conversation is going to harder than I envisioned it to be.
I felt Justin sit down on the couch next to me. I knew he sensed that there was something on my mind, and even though my face was still in my hands, I could tell he was looking at me. I exhaled a long breath, wanting all my thoughts and worries to just go away, even if it were for only a minute, I would be grateful.
"Crystal, is something wrong?" Worry was laced in his voice, and I felt his hand rested on my shoulder.
I slowly shook my head, not wanting to worry him about my problems. I heard him sigh; he obviously knew I was lying.
"Can you tell me the truth?" Justin asked.
I finally removed my face from the palm of my hands, and turned my head to meet his eyes.
"I don't know, it's just that it's kind of coming to my realization how hard this whole thing is going to be. Being a mom, I mean. You're going to be traveling a lot because of your job and there's nothing we can do about that. Meanwhile I'll be here, raising a child partly on my own no matter how much you want the be there," I paused, looking at the understanding expression on Justin's face. "How are we going to make this whole thing work?"
Justin sighed leaning back to rest his body on the back of the couch. He brought his hands up and rubbed his face, then ran them through his already messy hair.
"I don't know. But we'll find a way, I promise. I was planning on going on tour next year but now that I'm going to have a baby, I don't want to, or at least not once the Baby is actually born. Once I tell Scooter-and the rest of my crew, for that matter-I can ask him if I can possibly get some time off. Like no touring and limited traveling. I doubt my fans could last another year of me doing nothing," he answered.
"Justin, I don't want this to affect your career. I know it's far too important to you to just take another long break from it," I protested. He simply shook his head, not liking my response.
"Crystal, I do love my career but my family comes first, and if it means taking more time off to help be in my child's life, then I'll do it. I'll still do interviews, photo shoots, and awards shows, I'll just be limiting my traveling and how long I'm away. You have nothing to worry about," Justin assured me.
I rested my hands in my lap and played with my fingers. "Yeah, but I still feel like I'm coming in the way of everything. People are probably going to hate you-and me-for getting a girl pregnant they didn't even know about. You're going to be a dad at 21 years old and it's my fucking fault. I just feel like shit because of it. Nothing will ever be that same for you."
My voice was beginning to shake and I felt my vision begin to blur. Fuck, I was about to cry. I made sure my hair was shielding my face from Justin. He couldn't see me like this.
He must have noticed because he gripped my chin in his hand, and turned my head to face him. Wiping the few stray tears that had fallen down my face.
"Hey, this is my fault just as much as it is yours. If anything I'm more at fault because I was more sober than you were. Don't blame yourself for this, babe," I felt my heart flutter at the name. "Everything's going to be okay. I promise. Yeah, they'll be bumps in the road but it'll all turn out fine in the end. We'll make it work, no matter what it takes, we'll make it work."
With that, his lips captured mine a short but very passionate kiss. In just those few seconds where our lips had collided, I felt a whole zoo going crazy in my stomach, and fireworks erupted all through my veins, I couldn't help but wonder if he felt the same thing, or if I was just crazy. When our lips disconnected, Justin pulled back to his sitting position, watching me intently.
"I'm sorry, I'm just over-thinking everything. And my hormones are everywhere right now," I laughed pitifully, wiping the remaining tears off of my face, leaving the skin damp.
"It's fine. I completely understand where you're coming from with the whole 'over-thinking everything' shit. I haven't been able to stop thinking about this whole situation since the second you told me you were pregnant," he told me. "Come here."
Justin held out is arms, signaling me to go into them. I scooted over on the couch and sat in between his legs, and his arms wrapped around my waist. His chest was pressed to my back and his hand rested on my stomach. God, I love when he does that. I tilted my head back until my head was resting on his shoulder. I closed my eyes, exhaling a long breathe. This was so relaxing.
"I'm telling my family this Saturday," I spoke up after a few minutes of silence.
"Do you want me to be there with you?" he mumbled into my hair, while still slowly running his thumb over my growing, yet still not visible, baby.
"No, I can do it alone. And besides, my sister would freak if she found out, and I'm not prepared for that yet. I don't think my parents would be mad about it, anyway. My mom had me when she was 16, so she has no room to talk. If anything, they'll just be disappointed."
"They'll need to know I'm the dad eventually."
"And they will, just not yet. Maybe next Saturday," I assured. I felt him not behind me and mumble a short 'okay' in response.
We sat silently for a few more minutes, enjoying eachother's company, until the silence was broken, yet again.
"Have you made a doctor's appointment yet?" Justin asked.
I shook my head. "No, I wanted to find a day where you weren't busy so you could be there. I'll worry about that tomorrow."
I closed my eyes again a resituated my head on his shoulder. I know I just had a 2 hour nap but, damn, I'm tired. I blame the pregnancy.
"I'm tired," I yawned, nuzzling my body closer to Justin than I was before. He was comfortable, and I'm sure I'd had no problem falling asleep in his arms.
"Let's go upstairs, then. It's already 10:00."
I nodded and slowly stood up, immediately missing the comfort and warmth that Justin's body gave me. He got off of the couch after me, before grabbing my hand and leading me to the staircase that I really didn't feel like walking up, but I did anyway.
"I can give you some of my clothes to sleep in, if you want?" said Justin, once we got in his bedroom, which I had just now noticed was very messy. Aside from that, the bedroom was huge, and really pretty.
Smiling, I nodded my head, while sitting down at the end of his oh-so-comfortable bed. Justin dug in his dresser drawers until he pulled out a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. I'm sure the shirt was the smallest one he had but I still looked like it would be really big on me. I grabbed the clothes and thanked him shortly before walking towards his en-suite bathroom.
Closing the door behind me, I took notice of how gorgeous this bathroom was, and I'm pretty sure the jacuzzi tub in here cost more than everything in my apartment combined. It was absolutely beautiful in here; just like the other parts of the house that I'd seen.
I quickly pulled off my shirt and jeans, leaving me in only my undergarments. I stood in front of the full body mirror for a minute admiring the body I have now because I know in a little over two months it won't be the same. Turning to the side, I took notice on how flat my stomach was, and it was hard to believe that there was a soon to be human being in there.
After feeling like I was looking in mirror for long enough, I looked away and slipped Justin's clothes on, and just as I suspected, they were way too big. I didn't mind, though. They smelt like heaven and were really comfortable.
I was far too tired to shower tonight, so I decided I'd get one in the morning and exited the bathroom after flicking the light off.
Justin was laying in the middle of the bed, scrolling through something on his phone, and let's not forget the fact the he was only wearing his boxers. I bit my lip and averted my gaze somewhere else.
When he heard me, Justin looked from is phone to me. His eyes scanned over my outfit and he smiled. "You look cute in my clothes," he said.
"Thanks."
I carried my tired feet over to the bed, and pulled myself under the warm covers. Justin was still scrolling through his phone, probably on twitter.
"You know the paps got a picture of you coming here?" Justin asked. When my eyes widened, he quickly continued. "Don't worry. You can only see the back of your head. No one will know it's you."
"But my sister might," I reminded.
"I doubt it. All you look like is a girl with medium length blonde hair, there's no feature that make it obvious it'd be you," he assured. "And, the pap was far away, the camera wasn't that good, so it's not very good quality. You have nothing to worry about." He locked his phone, sending the entire bedroom in complete darkness. He, too, got under the covers. His hands wrapped around my waist and pulled me to him. I rested my head on his bare chest and wrapped my arms around his torso.
"I sure hope so."
"Goodnight, beautiful," Justin murmured.
"Goodnight," I sighed with contentment. For the first time in a while, I finally felt genuinely happy. I knew it wasn't going to be like this forever, so I was sure to live in the moment, and enjoy it while it lasts.
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this story has 470 reads???? omg. thanks to everyone who reads/comments/votes on this story!!!!!
(This chapter was written in June of 2014 and as I'm going back and editing in October 2015, I would like to point out that this story now has fUCKING 18000 READS HOLY SHIT. IT GAINS LIKE A HUNDRED OR SO EVERY DAY OH MY GOD.)
LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OF TIS CHAPTER AND PLEEEAASE VOTE.
I ALSO WOULD LIKE TO THANK MY BEST FRIEND SAMMI (POTTORFFPERFECTION) FOR HELPING ME WITH THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE I HAD MAJOR WRITER'S BLOCK AND SHE HELPED ME. (Also typing from when I was editing over a year after I wrote this chapter, I'm laughing because that girl literally is not my friend anymore and she hates me oooooops 😂😂)
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- Devyn