THE SEA AND
THE MOON
( part 3 )
WORD COUNT 1.5k
OVERVIEW the broken soulmates have found each other once again...
PLAYLIST universe / exo, thank you / got7, i love you / the rose
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OUTSIDE OF THE CLUB was miserable compared to the inside. a veritable black and white stretch of concrete jungle; jeongguk hated it already. he hated how namjoon had had to see him with someone else. it was like when namjoon hurt, he felt it in his own heart.
the older male looked a mess now that they had left the club. namjoon's eyes were bloodshot, his expression downcast and hurt, and he looked at jeongguk with such a damn craving, such damn hurt in his poor hazel irises. jeongguk hated himself for falling for someone else, and he was about to apologise, all sweet voice and gentle "i'm sorry"'s, but namjoon was the first to speak, his voice as shaky as jeongguk's hands.
"i love you."
as if on cue, jeongguk's lips opened to speak, but he caught himself. could he say it back? was that the equivalent of cheating? jeongguk was a lot of things, but he was not a cheater. at least, he thought so; he and namjoon hadn't properly terminated their love, but namjoon wasn't around, so jeongguk had supposed it was okay and fuck, he'd really messed up, hadn't he?
"h-hyung, i'm sorry," jeongguk said in response, seeing how namjoon almost visibly flinched when he didn't retaliate the way he'd been expecting. jeongguk took a deep breath. he had to do this, didn't he? "i-i love yoongi. i do." he seemed unsure of himself. namjoon could see that, and he shook his head.
"no, you don't," namjoon responded rather bluntly. jeongguk stared at him indignantly, sudden anger welling up in him. anger and sadness, a deep prehistoric sadness, for it was written in the stars when they were first created that they were destined to fall for one another.
"how can you say that?" jeongguk spat, suddenly annoyed. it was all wrong, everything about the once spirits was wrong. "you don't fucking know that i don't love him! you can't just say that!"
"i know you don't," namjoon seemed so expressionless, so wooden, and it was then that jeongguk realised he had to be high. the red eyes, the stiff and blunt responses. it added up. "i know you, ggukkie. i've known you for the past century, you think i don't know when you're in love?"
jeongguk spluttered, not knowing how to respond, because namjoon was right, he was so fucking right. but jeongguk loved yoongi, didn't he? of course, it wasn't the same kind of love he had had with namjoon, he knew that, but he loved the other once-spirit. his eyes welled with frustrated tears; he was so angry at the world, he just wanted to scream. everything had been alright, he was over namjoon, but he wasn't prepared for this at all.
"joon, i- i," jeongguk tried, hard, to form a sentence. "i miss you."
it was nothing but the stone cold truth. it was everything jeongguk felt and more, and his chest ached when he see how namjoon was looking at him; like he'd hung the moon. it had been ten years, ten years since namjoon had last looked at him like that, and holy fucking shit, it hurt deep in his chest. he realised now just how much he had missed the sea spirit, who was looking at him with a sad sort of smile. a movie smile.
"i miss you too," namjoon mumbled, his deep voice rumbling low in his chest. jeongguk couldn't help but compare his and yoongi's voices. namjoon's was smooth, like honey, while yoongi's was like a scratched record - a result of his cigarettes. "jeongguk, tell me... why yoongi?"
jeongguk blinked, a single, lonely tear falling from his chocolate eye. "w-what?" he said, quietly, eyes so innocent as he questioned. namjoon repeated himself, and jeongguk swallowed, adam's apple bobbing.
"he-he," jeongguk couldn't response. and why?
because he didn't know why he chose yoongi.
yoongi and namjoon were polar opposites. namjoon was jokingly dancing to slow rock songs, listening to tarantino movie soundtracks, having popcorn fights while cuddled up on the sofa, watching black and white movies at two in the morning. he was oversized hoodies and quoting philosophical gibberish that jeongguk tried to understand, he was juliet balconies in italy where the two had sat and kissed, he was gentle touches and hands threading through hair, soft kisses pressed to jeongguk's neck while he was falling asleep.
yoongi... jeongguk wasn't sure it was love. yoongi was the bitter taste of his favourite whiskey and the gross taste of his cigarettes - he smoked too much, jeongguk hated it - yoongi was upbeat rap songs and hard, biting kisses at jeongguk's neck. he was hickies left on jeongguk's neck, he was late nights watching the stars. and although jeongguk liked him, of course he liked him, he was still unsure of their relationship.
"he what, gguk?" namjoon asked. jeongguk breathed deep.
"he was all i had, namjoon. i woke up in my human form beside him. i was so lonely, pining for you, what did you expect me to do? i cried myself to sleep in yoongi's arms, hyung, that first night without you," he swallowed hard, painfully so, and a tear slipped out, more following. "i wanted you so badly, joon, i-"
jeongguk didn't get a chance to finish.
he didn't get a chance to finish because namjoon's lips were pressed to his.
this was euphoria.
namjoon was pretty sure that - even in his drug addled, alcohol soaked state - there was nothing better than the feeling of jeongguk's lips on his. it had happened so many times, in so many years, but every time was still as magical as the first time.
there were a few distinct things about jeongguk that namjoon had noticed never changed; the way his hands immediately went to namjoon's waist, how he seemed to shift closer to namjoon when the older carded his hands through his hair, how it seemed like his entire body molded perfectly to namjoon's. it was heaven, kissing him, and namjoon could've continued all night.
but, at the same time, there was something different. jeongguk seemed to be hesitant to kiss back, and that goddamn image of him and yoongi wouldn't get our of namjoon's head. it made his chest tighten and his brain spin, and suddenly he stiffened, pulling away and leaving jeongguk with an expression of surprise on his face.
"h-huh?" jeongguk was evidently confused, looking at namjoon with wide and confused doe eyes. namjoon shook his head, biting hard at his lip.
"i- i can't. not after seeing you two." namjoon said, his voice shaky and heartbroken. "it's wrong. even if i don't like seeing- seeing you two together, i'm not going to let you cheat on him."
jeongguk nibbled on his lip, staring ashamedly at his shoes. it seemed like he was trying to figure out what to do, fumbling with his fingers and glancing up at namjoon.
"i... i don't wanna be with him." jeongguk said. namjoon could see it was the truth, the way his voice was strong and he looked namjoon straight in the eyes. a spark of happiness bloomed in the sea-spirit's chest, and he truly believed that right there and then, he and jeongguk could love again.
however, neither of them had accounted for the fact that yoongi was standing in the doorway of the club, and he had heard what jeongguk had said. the blue haired boy coughed suddenly, as if to warn of his presence, and the two broken soulmates turned to look, jeongguk's doe eyes wide and apologetic.
"yoongi..." namjoon said carefully, not wanting an argument with the older spirit. yoongi shook his head.
"it's okay," he smiled softly, as if in understanding, and he walked toward jeongguk, placing a hand on his arm. "i understand, gguk. i was talking to jimin in the club, he's a friend of namjoon's, and he told me that namjoon seems to be missing someone. and that someone is obviously you."
jeongguk was crying, namjoon noticed, tears streaking his cheeks, but he was smiling, looking between yoongi and namjoon with such love in his eyes. "you don't mind?" namjoon asked the blue haired boy, and yoongi shrugged.
"i mean, of course i mind, but you two are meant to be," he said, smiling as he brushed a tear away from jeongguk's cheek, leaning in to kiss him one last time. "i'm sure i can manage without ggukkie. you, on the other hand, joon, i think you need him back."
and with that, jeongguk threw himself into namjoon's arms, smiling and sobbing at the same time, so much love and euphoria in his actions. namjoon wrapped his arms around his love, peppering kisses onto his cheeks and smiling like he'd just won the best thing he could've asked for. in a way, he had. he had all he could ever want, right there in his arms.
jeongguk smiled widely and pressed a kiss to namjoon's lips, eyes sparkling like stars. "i love you." he whispered, and namjoon laughed, cupping jeongguk's face in his hands.
"i love you too."
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I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I HAD TEARS IN MY EYES WRITING THAT END SCENE BLAME THE EYES ON YOU ALBUM STAN GOT7 STAN TEARS
i love namgguk s o m u c h
love y'all
- jace