The next morning, I woke to feel as though I'd spent the night on a fluffy white cloud, though I was still tired from all the tossing and turning I'd done.
Having made the decision to talk to my mother, I got up to get my phone. If I knew what was going on, I could have something concrete to worry about rather than the over-imaginative situations—none of which were in the realm of good—running through my tired brain. If I couldn't reason with her, I would unbind my abilities. I was pretty sure I knew how after doing it so many times.
After one step away from the bed, I felt a cramp in the pit of my stomach.
Starting small, the intensity escalated until the pain forced me to backtrack to the edge of the mattress. I sat, doubled over with my fists squeezing the comforter and my toes curled towards the balls of my feet. It was all I could do until the torture abated with the start of what would've been a window-shattering scream.
Then, just as fast as it had come, the pain was gone.
I stood again and stretched, checking for residual tenderness that might have remained as a reminder that something wasn't right. It was gone. If I wasn't left breathless, I'd never have believed it existed outside of my head.
I picked up my cell phone and pressed the speed-dial for home before my decision rescinded itself. It took half a ring before Zach answered. If he hadn't greeted me by saying that he'd get my mom, followed by placing me on hold, I would have disconnected the call.
"Nora?"
"Why did Zach answer?" The sound of both their voices made every nerve in my body raw, and the conversation became a struggle before it began.
"I, uh, I wasn't feeling so well, so I went to bed."
"Are you okay?"
"Oh, I'm fine. I just needed some rest," she said.
My mother sounded tired. Was it just rest she needed or was she lying again? When had it gotten to the point where I questioned everything she said?
"I'm okay. I just spent the night at Nancy's. I know I'm supposed to ask, but considering..." I sighed. "Aiden called you, right? I wasn't—"
"Honey, I knew where you were. I'm just so glad that you called. Are you okay?"
"Define okay."
"Of course, you're not okay." She sighed. "I'm sorry."
"No, I'm not okay, Mom, but I don't want apologies. I want to know what the hell is going on."
"I don't—I can't..." my mother began and stopped, only to begin again and halt once more.
"You can't just leave something like this hanging, Mom. This is about me, right? I should be the one to decide whether I can handle it, not you and Zachariah. Although, from the way things sounded yesterday morning, he and I are on the same page for once. Ironic, isn't it? Do you believe that I can't handle what's going on? If somebody is in danger, I will accept my powers and help. Then you can bind me again."
"Calm down, Nora. This isn't as simple as all that. Binding your powers was easy to do until a few years ago because you hadn't used them. Now it's much harder—"
"That's not true," I said, cutting her off. "Don't pretend you don't know. A few years ago, when I had you bind my powers—remember the first time I blew up my closet door? What I didn't tell you was that they had been unbound for a week. I tried a few things. Nothing big and nothing selfish. I wanted to be sure I was making the right decision about keeping them bound. I had never tried it out before, and only twice since, but then I was positive I didn't want them after I torched my clearing in what I thought had destroyed it until this summer."
"Oh, Noreena, you should have told me," she said, sounding anxious. "Did you cloak your signature at least?"
"How would I know to do it then if you just taught me about it this summer? Hell, I still don't understand that part. I just did a couple of cleansing thingies that were in your first Book of Shadows, and then tried casting a circle. When all that happened was a little wind rustling, which turned out to be the birds in the tree I'd been sitting under, I figured that all the hype wasn't worth what everyone keeps raving about. It's not like I cast a spell for popularity or beauty or something."
"That isn't the point. Your powers don't manifest in full until you mature. You hadn't reached that point then. Even now, it'll be years until you've fully developed. What you began... Well, I guess now we do have to talk, and I can't wait until you graduate to do it. I'm so sorry."
"Sorry for what, Mom? Just tell me what the hell you are talking about."
"Never mind what happened then. I will explain that all to you when you are home—in person, not over the phone. What you did then was nothing compared to what you would do now were you to reattempt it. You could cause storms, Noreena. I mean full-out natural disasters. How you direct magic can be damaging if you are not careful, but it can also be something of goodness. You need to come home so we can talk."
"Ju-just wait," I stammered as another cramp took hold. I looked in the mirror. My olive complexion was now chalk-white and drawn into a grimace. The coppery taste of blood filled my mouth from where I bit down on my lip to keep from making a sound my mother would hear.
"What is it?" she asked. "I'm sure Nancy's parents would understand if you came home. It's not like you had my permission to spend the night there in the first place."
"Is that what you want to point out right now, Mom?" I snapped, gaining control of my voice. "I just woke up. I need to get ready and at least say good morning. Or would you rather that I pack up and leave without a word?"
"No, of course, I don't want to worry them," she said, resigned to my stubbornness. "Go say goodbye. If Nancy can't bring you home, phone me back, and I will come to pick you up."
"It's just a couple of blocks. I can walk."
"No. Either Nancy drives or I come and pick you up, okay? Please, just do as I say."
"We'll talk when I come home? About everything?" I held my breath and waited for her answer. Was I going to be able to find the truth? Was it a ruse to get me home so she could keep me from leaving again or unbind me?
"If that is what you want."
My breath rushed out with a sigh. The small amount of hope I could muster flared within my chest. "That's all I've been asking for."
"Then I will see you in a little while." Her sigh gave away her trepidation over what she faced. "Please hurry."
"I will." There was no way I was giving her time to change her mind.
"I love you, Noreena," she added. "No matter what, I have always and will always love you."
"I know, Mom," I said, annoyed. "I love you no matter what, too."
I clicked off the phone before the conversation that wasn't going anywhere continued. I closed my eyes and flung myself back onto the soft-as-snow mattress. With one hurdle over without bloodshed, I prayed for the strength I was going to need for the next one, whatever that may be. I closed my eyes to relish in my victory.