Still the same day
You're beautiful.
Warning ⚠️- graphic typing ahead..
Ben
Me and Sky was currently chilling in the hotel room. I was texting some girls back that I met at the mall while waiting for Skylar slow ass to come out.
We had just got back from the mall and it's time to make our way to the show but I'm not feeling Skylar no more like I feel like we ain't good together.
I don't know I'm still young, I want to continue to do me and not worried about having a girlfriend. I don't know how I'm going to break it down to her. I'll figure it all out when I have the time.
I started laughing as I sent the text. These girls out hear want all the respect in the world. How I'm I suppose respect you if you don't respect yourself, Will never.
"Ben, did you hear me?" sky asked me while putting on her socks.
I shut my phone off and dropped it on my lap, "No, what did you say tho."
She looked up at me before grabbing her shoes, "What are you getting me for Christmas?"
"I don't know."
I really wanted to say nothing cause I don't plan on being with her by time Christmas come around.
"Better hurry up. What's on your mind cause you been acting different lately, like you playing the 50?"
I knew she was going asked. I just ranned my hands down my face and was about to just go for it. You know what they say speak now or forever hold your peace and I'm about to speak know.
"I ain't feeling this."
"What you you mean you ain't feeling this?" She asked give me her full attention.
"Us, what the fuck else is I'm talking about. Say, this just ain't going work."
"For one don't talk to me like that. Cause honestly you about to get slapped. Secondly, nigga when the fuck did you start feeling this way?" She asked I can tell she getting mad.
"Say, all that shit don't matter. I'm just not into this relationship no more. If we really meant to be then we going find our way back to each other but this ain't what I want right now."
"Ard, whatever Ben." She said fanning me off.
"Mane, say I don't wanna talk about this shit no more. I'll tell you later, but as of now we ain't together." I said as I walked out the door to go over K and Paris hotel room.
Deep down inside I felt bad but I rather told her the honest truth. Then me go out and do single people shit and hurt her even more in the process.
Paris
I was in the bathroom doing my hair while on FaceTime with my mother.
"Maaaaa!!"
"What do you want Paris?" She said picking up the flat irons.
"Where you going being all grown, imma tell my daddy."
She started laughing cause she know my daddy don't play. They still be getting it in every know and then.
"Girl bye, your daddy can't handle me." She states while twerking in the camera.
"Eww ma pewww." I said laughing.
"Anyways, did y'all-" her sentence got cut off because she started coughing non stop then she started hyper ventilating cause she couldn't catch her breath.
"Ma you good? Want me to catch a flight home?" I ain't never seen my moms like that so that just hit deep for me.
My grandmother and 4 of my cousins died of cancer. Apparently cancer run through our family however our mom make sure we stayed checked and clear of cancer. I prayed every night that she never have to deal with that.
"Yeah I'm ok I just have a cold."
"Ard you sure?"
"Yeah, throw me on your chat snap before I hang up."
I knew she was trying change the subject so I dropped it and took a screenshot of us.
I walked out the bathroom and there was Kentrell all dressed up with his big ugly ass.
"Say, ya big head ass took bout 78 years.. What were was doing in there?" He asked.
"78 years and still look ugly as shit." 3 said laughing I just put my middle finger up at him.
"Playing with myself." I said laughing making Ben choke on his blunt.
"I believe you too. Just nasty." KD said.
"Yo, you so fucking stupid. Keep chocking and shit gay ass." Baby joe said mugging Ben.
"Shut up and lets get to this concert." Briana said.
"Girl you shut up." Boomer said being immature.
"Say, Montana did Nisha ever text you about Draco flying down here tomorrow with Kendell?" K asked as we hopped into the truck.
"Yeah, heres the message." Montana said while passing the phone to me but shit I wanted read what it said.
"Damn your nosey ass." Baby joe said.
"Shut up." I replied rolling my eyes and handing the phone to K.
'Fuck my sister at' I thought as I looked around the car confused. I decided to text her to let her now we already left and that she can catch a Uber or a lift.
I felt something in my heart that something wasn't right. Like that feeling you get that you need to be there for someone, only thing different was that someone was my sister. I didn't think about it too much.
We had pulled up to the venue and it was time to perform since they decided to make a quick food stop. We all made it on stage where the turn up begins or so I thought.
MeanWhile...
(I advise y'all to listen to this song as you read Sky's POV)
Skylar
I was currently in the hotel room with my back agains the wall with my head in my hands crying and questioning god. The only song that kept playing in my head is Bad habit
'I'm ready to turn this page. And get over this phase. But every time you knock knock. I answer the door. And every time I hear your ringtone. I can't press ignore.'
For so long I had kept my feelings inside of me because I'm always that 'funny or goofy' person, and people always think they know me.
Seems like nothing I do will ever be good enough. I try my best to be happy and make others around me happy but its almost never enough.
'Why I can't get over you don't understand it. I can see my way out but I feel so so stranded oh! You got my vison so distorted.'
Its like I take 5 steps forward all of a sudden I take 1,000 steps back. I just feel alone and closed in. No doubt I'll go to war behind Ben, No doubt no matter what he does to me I'll behind him wrong or right.
I know I have people that I can talk to but how do you know who really understand where I'm coming from?
'Gotta find a way to break these chains. I got stop running to you. I just can't have it. You're just a bad habit. You ain't even my worst addiction'
I've had my heart broken so many times. I've done put my all into me and Ben relationship only to find out he don't want me. What it is? I'm I not good enough.
All my life I struggle with my confidence, no matter how many times I told myself 'you're beautiful' it never help gain confidence to stopped the pain that was coming.
What's the point of living if this the ways life goes I don't wanna be here anymore. With that thought I got from the desk and grabbed my belt from my suitcase and said a quick prayer.
"God I'm so tired of living like this, I wanna be happy, but if this is what life's like I don't want to be here. Please forgive me for all the bad I did as a child. Please forgive me." I prayed as tears came down my face.
I put the belt around my neck as I stood on the chair, "I love y'all always and forever" with that thought I kicked the chair.
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Yeahhhh, I came with another bangerrrrrr. But dead serious, if you ever feel alone and need someone to talk I'm always ready to listen.
You're beautiful and never let anyone tell you different.
#BALTIMOREBOOMING
#NBAxBBGxMGNG✅
#Slatt
Miraaaa out this BITCHHHHH