If This Is Love: 37 | One Hundred Percent Yes
| Laura Renae |
| A Few Days Later (September 15th, 2017) |
"I forget that you wake up so early, Renae." Stormie says, sitting across from me at one of the tables in the bus. We were on our way to Scotland and as per usual, I was the first one awake. Like, the only other person up until now was the driver. So for the past hour, I've been replying to emails and scrolling through my twitter feed on my laptop.
"I wish I didn't." I tell her, taking another bite out of my cliff bar. Every morning, I eat a cliff bar and drink some coffee, then usually eat again once the boys or Rydel get up. "Hey, so you know how Rocky, Ross and Ryland want to move into a house together?"
"As far as I know that's their plan." She tells me, nodding her head.
"Is it... rude if I don't really want to move in with them?" I ask, shutting my laptop. She furrows her eyebrows. "I love the boys, I really love them, but I'm not sure if I can deal with being the only girl in the house. I had Rydel before, and even when I'm at your place so have you, but I just... it's gonna turn into a complete man cave." I say, leaning back against the seat.
"Have you talked to Ross about it?" She asks. I shake my head. "Would you rather live alone?" She asks.
"I'd actually rather live with Ross and only Ross. But you and I both know he won't go for that. So I'm either stuck with the boys or try and find my own place. And I'm afraid that if I choose the latter, then Ross will be upset. Either way I'm gonna spend most my time at their place considering I'm dating him. So it'd be silly to live by myself." I quietly say.
"I think maybe you should talk to Ross about it, sweetie. Plus, you shouldn't be worrying about this right now. Thy haven't even found a rentable house they like yet." She tells me.
"Yeah, I guess." I whisper. "I just don't want to hurt his feelings."
"Trust me, you won't hurt his feelings, Renae." I nod slowly. "Don't stress about. Just see what happens in these next few months." I sigh and nod, knowing it's could be months before the boys make up their minds. Riker suddenly walks into the main area, only in his briefs, and fully stretches because the boys are too tall to stand up straight by the bunks.
"Dude, put some clothes on." I say, slapping his bare stomach the slightest.
"Hey, give me a break. I just woke up." He sleepily says. He rubs his eyes briefly before putting his glasses back on and opening the cabinet above the sink. "Anyone want coffee?" He asks. I hold up my mug of it. "Smart girl." He mumbles. "When are we getting to Scotland?"
"Who knows. Wait Rike, Hurts Good is officially out." I say, immediately going to Apple Music.
"Sweet. Everyone will be jamming out to it by tomorrow nights concert then." He says. "Should I wake up everyone else?" He asks.
"No, it's fine. Let them sleep. The hotel is in the middle of town so all of you can explore at different times." Stormie says.
"I'm gonna wake up Ross in a half hour." I announce.
"It'll be eight. He's gonna kill you." Riker says, walking back down the aisle. He returns minutes later with black jeans on and a t-shirt, of course his glasses and some socks. He grabs his coffee mug and sits on the other side of the bus at the table.
"I'm gonna bribe him with food. I'm sure he'll be fine." I reply, shrugging my shoulders.
"He was up pretty late last night finishing up a song with Rocky in the back. They kept waking me up every time they got excited about how it sounded." Riker says, rubbing his eyes under his glasses. When I got up a couple hours ago, I put in my contacts and did a little bit of makeup to hide the scary face I had, which consisted of some moisturizer, concealer, powder and mascara. I didn't bother with foundation or blush and all that because I didn't have terrible skin.
"Ah, glad I slept through that. These pills are miracle workers." I say, giving him a head nod. I close my laptop, letting myself lean up against the seat and take a deep breath. "Although I kind of wish I slept longer." I whisper.
"What time did you wake up?" He asks.
"Like four thirty." I immediately reply.
"What the hell? Why?" He asks.
"Medication, Riker. She can't help it." Stormie tells him.
"Yeah, that and I went to bed the second we got done with the show." I say. "Like I actually forgot to plug in my phone and check my email like I usually do. It was absolutely insane how tired I was."
"But that's still only like six hours of sleep." He tells me. I just sigh and shrug my shoulders a bit.
"I usually get more, jet lag is kicking my butt. I'll start sleeping a couple more hours within the next week or two." I say to him. "I actually have a question for you, Riker." He furrows his eyebrows at me. "When Vanni and you first started dating... how long did it take before you two considering telling other people besides friends and family? I knew it took a couple years to officially announce it, but like... when did you stop caring about the cute photos strangers took of you and just letting people suspect things." He licks his lips real quick before messing with his hair.
"Uh, when it came to telling like, acquaintances, it took maybe tenish months to a year?" He questions. "But when we started dating we weren't exactly as big as we are now, so we didn't really have anybody take pictures of us. The only person to post those photos was mom. And obviously you guys posted pictures with her, but we really didn't mind. We knew we loved each other and never really imagined a life where we'd break up, so we kinda just stopped caring and started letting people see us out in the open and letting us comment on each other's photos. We took small steps, so it wasn't a big bombshell on the fans or anything." He explains.
"So is it a good or bad thing to let Rydel keep in moments for the videos?" I ask, referring to the one R6TV Rydel published on YouTube with us being all together again.
"Everyone's different. If you want to share your relationship with everyone, then just do it. Whether it's through a video on your Instagram story, a video on YouTube, an interview, or a photo you post, it doesn't really matter." He tells me.
"What about the easing into it?" I ask.
"I don't know, I guess have Rydel keep in clips of you two play fighting like you always do, or have her film you two right after you sing If This Is Love." He explains. "Just talk to him, I'm sure you two can figure something out on how to share your relationship."
"What about the mean comments?" I ask. "Like, obviously we all get haters nowadays, but a ton of fan girls think that Ross is theirs and only theirs." He chuckles a little, completely agreeing with that statement.
"Yeah, that's the hard part. Vanni had to get use to it and I did catch her crying a couple times. It's just like every other hate comment you've received. You read it, roll your eyes, and keep scrolling. So many people will make assumptions about you two and whether you're happy or not, but you just have to remember that they have absolutely no idea what they're talking about. You and Ross are the ones in the relationship and you have to remember that they're all just jealous of you or him." He explains to me. "Trust me, all that's worth it. Because Vanni got so much happier when we went public, despite the hate, because she had no secrets to hide. I had no secrets to hide and it was a good feeling."
"We've only been dating for not even four months." I tell him quietly.
"Well, you two are best friends. Deep down, it's like the two of you have been dating since you were ten." I roll my eyes at him.
"We didn't know each other when we were ten." I mumble, my cheeks getting a little pink. "And like, Rydel and Ellington waited two years to officially come out and say they were dating."
"Again, we weren't as popular back then. It wasn't that hard to hide secrets from the fans. You're dating Ross Lynch, Brady, Jeffery Dahmer, Kyle, and any other future character he will be. Not to mention, you just filmed a movie, you did a movie a few years back, you two are much more famous and it's incredibly hard not to have leaked photos of you out in public. But just because they get leaked doesn't mean you have to confirm anything." He tells me. Stormie just quietly sat across from me, listening to the two of us talk with a smile on her face.
"Thanks, Riker." I say, giving him a smile of my own.
"My number one thing is talk to Ross about it. Like really talk about it." I nod my head at him.
"Wow, you're actually letting me hold your hand in public? Anyone could see us, bean. Anyone with a camera or a phone." He tells me, the teasing in his tone very evident. I roll my eyes and lean into him as a sign to shut up. "You seriously don't care?" He asks, the teasing gone. I shrug my shoulders as we stop at light. Ross presses the bottom and now all we have to do is wait to walk across the street.
"I don't think so." I admit, shrugging my shoulders. Ross' uses his free hand to grab the side of my face so I'm looking at him. He had his brows furrowed and his mouth slightly open.
"What?" He asks. "Last time I checked, so yesterday, I was only allowed to wrap an arm around your shoulder at night time away from the venue." Now he holds up our intertwined hands. "And now we're holding hands?"
"Do you not want to hold hands?" I ask him.
"Of course I want to hold hands. I just didn't think you wanted to hold hands. You're kind of the one who made these rules." He tells me. "Shit, we missed our chance to walk across the street." He mumbles, pressing the button again. I turn around and spot a bench a little ways back and gently tug on Ross' hand to follow me. He doesn't object, he just follows me until I sit down. He lets go of my hand to sit beside me, turning his body towards me so our knees were touching. "What changed overnight?" He asks.
"I talked to Riker right before I woke you up and he really opened my eyes about all this. We can't avoid pictures, Ross. As much as we don't like to label ourselves as famous, we do have the occasional paparazzi and fans who snap pictures or videos of us just walking down the street. I want to be able to hold your hand and hug you whenever I want. Even kissing you for a second or two is something I don't want to be scared of to do in public." I tell him.
"So you want to make our relationship public?" He asks.
"Kind of." I mumble, messing with my fingers. "I kind of just want it to be out there yet not confirmed. So like, no posting pictures with lovey sappy captions, but if you post something I want to comment something, just... baby steps, I guess is what I'm trying to say."
"What about you and I filming for R6TV?" He asks. "What is Rydel allowed to keep in?" He asks.
"It depends on if we're on the same page or not. If we decide to not really care what people see us as, then we can let her keep whatever, except maybe try to avoid kissing me when one of us are filming." I reply, shrugging my shoulders. "I don't care if you kiss me in public, just maybe try to avoid cameras for now when you want to." I add.
"You really want to do this?" He asks. "Like, you won't change your mind the second a photo of us being intimate?" I smile at his little cuteness and shake my head.
"I won't freak out and change my min. I want to do this, as long as you want to too." I tell him.
"One hundred percent?" He clarifies.
"One hundre-" He cuts me off by kissing my lips. "Wow, okay." I whisper, pulling away from him the slightest.
"Am I allowed to kiss you again?" He asks.
"Totally." I whisper, giving him a smile.
• okay so... long time no see? not to mention, shittiest chapter of the century... hopefully it wasn't too crappy because i was stuck on this for WEEKS. i'm not promising an update next week, but i will try my hardest! don't forget to vote, comment something sweet and follow me! •
-rydelly_belly💜