Maybe this was the day I had least paid Maybe this was the day I had least paid attention in class. I was still with my thoughts concentrated on Benjamin's lips on mine. I wrote his name next to mine in the notebook at least ten times; I closed it and put it in my backpack as soon as the intermission bell ringing. I got up from my seat, and I came across Benjamin holding out his hand for me to hold.
"Ben, do not embarrass me, this is not the place," I said in a lower tone. He shrugged, and we continued together for the break, hand in hand. We met with Carla in the hallway; she gave me a mischievous smile like a curious child. I walked behind Ben, and Carla came to my side. We did not want Ben to read our lips.
"Was it good?" Carla asked softly, and with her hand hiding her mouth. The noise in the hallway favored our secret conversation. I nodded. "Does he kiss well?"
"I liked, but there's no way I could know," I did number 1 for her, trying to remind her that Ben was the first guy I'd ever kissed, but something told me that he would be the one who stuck his mark in my heart.
Ben had managed to be served first in the canteen. Carla and I still were whispering about the kiss when he approached. He pretended a cough and spread the snack to us.
"How much subject, eh?" Ben said with a smile from those who knew he was the subject.
"Bought right?" Carla said taking the bag from Ben's hand. Along with the bag, he also handed the money to Carla and then mine.
"We do not need you to pay for our snack," Carla and I speak simultaneously.
"You do not have to throw stones at me; I just wanted to be nice. If you do not want, I want," Ben said pretending he would take the snack from our hands.
"We can accept for today," I blinked at Carla.
"All right, penny-pincher boyfriend is not cool. One more point for you, Benjamin," Carla gave a compliment.
"I'm sure I will win more. Your friend is a lucky girl to have a guy like me as her boyfriend," Carla rolled her eyes at Benjamin's modesty. The same pulled me by the waist, placed a kiss on my belly on the shirt of the school uniform. "I'm luckier," He told me looking up, making me stare at him.
"Ben, people are watching," I held him lightly on his shoulders and pulled away from him.
"I think I'm the third wheel," Carla said making mention that she would get up and leave.
"There's too much light, why we would want a candle?"
"Ben!" I hit him the arm. "Carla, you're never going to be the third wheel."
"All right, maybe the light will come to an end."
"Sunlight, Ben?" Carla said smiling. "I think it's too early for that."
I knew the fight would only end when Carla said the last word. I ate my cake while savoring the soda.
"I was thinking," Ben said after a few minutes in silence.
"You think?" Carla snapped. Ben ignored her.
"Me and you," Ben caught me with his gaze. "We could go out tonight."
"I'm grounded," I tried to remind him.
"You're grounded for not going out with me, but you can go out with Carla. She could go to your house and get you," Now I can understand why he did not retaliate with Carla's little-barbed. "Would you do that, Carla, my dear?" Carla was thoughtful. "I can convince Fernando to go," Ben completed.
"I can do what you suggested, but tomorrow. You don't have to convince Fernando to go, Ben, my dear," Benjamin smiled.
"Oh really? I thought you wanted to."
"Not like that."
"My friend, I don't like to see you sad," I hugged Carla from behind and placed a kiss on her cheek. I knew she was grieving over Fernando.
"You do not want me around, and you do not even hug me like that," Ben said, putting his hand on his chin, and making an abandoned dogface.
"Baby boy!" I said letting go Carla and approaching Ben. I slid my fingers over his hair.
"Only when I'm near you," Ben said resting his head on my belly.
"I'm going to vomit there," Carla said.
"You don't have to go."
"I'll be fine," And she is gone.
"I do not want to get away from my best friend just because I'm dating. I don't like this."
"You don't have to do this. I can divide the attention and is good that you are already getting acquainted with the word dating."
I waited patiently for my mother to arrive while I watched Supernatural. As soon as I heard the sound of her car, I tried to relax, in the face of the fact that the philosophy teacher had handed my cell phone in her hand. As she entered the room, she threw her cell phone on the couch.
"I will not do it again," I tried to redeem myself.
"Do not do it."
"You read my messages?"
"Unfortunately, I could not figure out the password. I need to take a shower, Elle. I am just not going to raise the issue because Beatriz said I should take it easy, because you are a good student, and that was the first time that this happened. Be careful, Elle. You will need a good school curriculum if you want to be accepted in the college you have always dreamed."
27th Day
It was the tenth piece of clothing I had ever tried on. My stock of T-shirt and new jeans was already running out. Carla had managed to convince my mother to go out together today. She used the reason that next week was her birthday and that she would need me at the mall to help them with some decorative items for her party. My mother trusted Carla and did not raise any suspicions that the real reason I wanted to leave home on Thursday night was Benjamin.
"I'm feeling horrible," Carla laughed at my nervousness.
"I never thought I'd see you like this," She had been sitting on the bed, her hands resting on the mattress, and her legs dangling. "If I had known I would have brought one of my dresses for you. I just didn't bring it because I didn't want to get your mom's attention. Come on!" She was trying to cheer me up. "Now loose the hair. Guys prefer girls to wear loose hair."
"It makes no difference to me."
"In their view, no. The guy prefers girls without makeup as well. They like more of natural beauty."
"But that is not why we should convince ourselves."
"Not even."
It was already past seven at night, and one of the things my mother liked to do when she was at home at this time was to watch soap operas. I had this advantage in my favor, but that did not stop her from noticing my loose hair. The only moments my mother had seen me with loose hair was when I washed it, and let it dry naturally. I said goodbye to her and headed to the bus stop. That was also in my favor. The bus stop was at a five-minute walk to from my house, and we did not get a good view of there up to my house, thanks to a vast tree that was surrounding it. So that meant that I would not take the risk that, by chance, my mother would go out to see the movement of the street, she would not see Ben openly with us.
He was already there when we arrived. Benjamin wore pants and a blue shirt that stood out, even more, his eyes. He smirked at me, making me smile in a way that only he could do.
"I was waiting patiently for you," I leaned over him, not caring which of our neighbors might be watching us now. I laid a quick kiss on his mouth. "I need to tell you, you look beautiful," Ben said tossing a lock of my hair back.
"I'm dressed the same way as always," I responded blushing at the way the beautiful word came out of his mouth.
"I have so much to tell you."
"I think you should talk later," Carla said interrupting Benjamin. "Wrong place. I did not give it to work and persuade Elizabeth to let Elle go out, to ruin everything because you are picked up here."
"We're not picked up!" I defended myself.
"I would not care if we were."
"Great! Conspire to embarrass me."
The bus took a few minutes to arrive. Which made me wonder if I could get away. As soon as we entered, a new concern surrounded us. Benjamin again did not know where we were going. We sat on a seat next to where he was. Carla was sulking because Benjamin did not know precisely where he was taking us. Taking us would be exactly the words. Carla would sleep in my house, so where would I go, she would go, and this would prevent us from losing each other. She would be separated from us when we had the place, with a cell phone, it would be easy to meet later.
"So, Benjamin, have you made up your mind?" Carla asked for the third time.
"Whether nightclub, funk dance, or some party please you, I have several options."
"Not," Party, dances and I did not match. I preferred a movie theater, a walk in an unfamiliar city, or the comfort of my home. At that moment, the only one of those options that fit together with Benjamin and me was the movies theater, but he did not want to go to the movies theater, but yes in a nightclub that he used to attend before the accident.
"Please," Ben was holding in my fist while he begged. "Please."
"There's a lot of people."
"When we get inside it will seem like there's only us," He replied winking at me.
"I'm a minor."
"I was also when I went to the place. Cooperate with me! Just tonight."
"Ben, you can get hurt."
"I'm no child. Please?"
"Carla?" I wanted her consent.
"Nightclub! Will be cool."
"That's it, girl!" Ben said, and then the two gave a touch of the hand.
"I cannot believe I'm doing this," I said as we waited in line at the nightclub.
The security guard looked at Ben, narrowed his gaze, and thought for a while. He looked again until he said hello. A flash of recognition flashed through his eyes.
"Ben, I can't believe it's you!" He said getting down to hug him. I wondered who in this town Ben did not know, maybe the people behind us, who were already irritated by the security delay in releasing the queue. "I thought I would never be having your presence here again."
"Me too. I need a favor," Ben told him. "Can you release their entry?"
The security man cleared his throat, after a few seconds of thought, released our entrance without much fanfare.
The dancing sound of Avicii's song dominated the place along with the colorful lights.
The place was already full, and I wondered how Ben could move the wheelchair in there. The stench of cigarette smoke upset my stomach. It was not my favorite place; people dancing did not fit with my lifestyle. I would not dance; I did not want to look like a dull worm on the dance floor.
"We need a more reserved place," Ben shouted.
Carla apologizes while I tried to guide Ben's wheelchair. She had heard many pick-up lines as she decided to make her way through the crowd. We went to a corner, where the number of people was smaller than on the dance floor.
"Buy a drink for me, please," Ben asked Carla.
"No!" I said taking the money from Ben's hand. "We did not come here for that."
"So let's dance," Ben said and pulled me into his lap.
"You're disdainful again," Ben nodded, took the money from my hand and handed it to Carla.
"Any of them?" Ben nodded.
"I just want to get rid of you," Ben said in a whisper, and Carla's answer showed the middle finger to him.
"I do not believe you will obey him."
"Relax, Elle. I will not buy more than one," I saw Carla disappear into the crowd. Ben put my face between his fingers, taking her close to his face. I looked around trying to find someone I knew.
"There is no one looking at us," He said trying to speak louder than the music that played the night. He pulled me with a little strength closer to him, kissed me without fear, and I reciprocate with the same intensity initiated by him. "I'm enjoying this," Ben said and let go of my lips. "Do not be shy, Elle." He kissed the tip of my nose.
"I will try," I threw my arm around his neck, and I kissed him.
Carla was slow to return; I began to suspect that she did not want to be between Benjamin and me.
Ben looked away from me and looked the other way.
"What an unpleasant sight!"
"Nice to see you too, my friend. Skinny?"
"Hello, beast!" I said to Marcos, who returned with a wry smile. "You wanted to come here because you knew you'd find him here," I said to Ben. Not only him but also a little distant I located the other two goofy. They approached reluctantly. The thinner, whose name is André, held out his hand to Ben. The same left the hand of the ex-friend stopped in the air, who lowered him soon a little bland.
"Good to see you," Bruno said. Ben gave a half smile as if disagreeing with him.
"So are you together?" Andrew asked still unsightly. "You're the teacher's daughter execut... Elizabeth," He corrected in time. "What's your name again? Is Ellen?"
"It's Elle," Ben snapped.
"Who would say...?" Bruno said, and Marcos scolded him with a not inconspicuous nudge.
"I said not to say anything. Ben does not like that we talk," Marcos said.
"We're listening, so do not talk like we're not here," Ben said.
Carla approached us with a glass of drink in her hand, and the three boys stared at her from top to bottom.
"This is the party of goofy," Carla said. She and I looked at each other and laughed. I am sure she remembered, just as I did, their stupid behaviors in school. All they needed was to put a plaque hanging from his neck with the words: I am hot.
"I remembered you were beautiful, but now," Marcos said leaning his arm on Carla's shoulder. She, in turn, took his arm without any kindness.
"I do not remember you were having all those muscles," Marcos smiled, not realizing the irony behind Carla's words.
"I work out hard. Any of these days, I can teach you."
"I'm sure your methods will not please me."
"Shouldn't you be in college?" Ben said interrupting Marcos's advances on Carla.
"I made an exception, and I'm glad I did this," He said looking at Carla. "And you? I never thought I'd see you here again."
"I missed the place."
"And you, skinny? Did your mother release you?"
"If you call me on skinny again, I won't answer for my actions!"
"I will not do anything to stop her," Ben said smiling. Then Marcos shot:
"Jessica is there," I was silent; I looked at a completely pale Ben. That hit him entirely, not just him, but also everyone there seemed not to react. No one knew what to say. Who did not know the tragic way that their courtship ended? Why did Marcos have to touch her name with me present there?
"Worm!" Carla was the first to speak. "You are disgusting!"
"It's okay, Carla, enough," I tried to stop her.
"I do not like people like that."
"We'd better go," André said, pulling Marcos by the arm.
"I'm sorry," Bruno told Ben. "It was good seeing you! Really."
"I'm going to the restroom," Carla said wanting to leave us alone. I noticed she came out sipping the drink. I just hope she does not overdo it.
"Does her name when it is said by someone still makes you feel something?" I asked.
"I was just surprised. I'm sorry if I upset you."
"You looked like you were somewhere else when you heard her name."
"It was not intentional. I like you, Elle. Believe me," Ben stroked my face with the palm of his hand. I put my hand over his hand to stop the gesture.
"You still don't seem to be here."
"I'm. Just believe me."
"It was all very fast. The way it all happened between us. It has not been a month since we met"
"Are you counting the days, Elle?"
"If I am?" I answered a little embarrassed, for I looked like a psychopath. "This is to confirm what I said. It was very fast, you're in love with me, if you tell the truth."
"I'm," Ben said holding my waist tightly. "It was not easy to face the truth head-on. It was not in my plans to fall in love with you and neither by anyone. I just wanted to finish high school, leave home and live my life without being in love with someone. It was then that I began to realize how much I missed you when you were not there. How I was happy when the intercom was ringing, and Laura or my mother came and announced that you had arrived when I talked about you more than I talked about me to the people. My father said I was unbearable. My aunt and Fernando opened my eyes. Yeah, Fernando had a big part in it. In addition, especially when I wanted to hurt you, and who was injured was I. Like that day that I ignored you. I wanted to hurt you, and it was me who suffered the consequences. Then, if this is not to be in love with someone if this does not love, I do not know what it is. Do you believe me, or do you want me to make one more list?"
"I believe you," I said hugging him.
At ten hours and twenty minutes, we arrived in our neighborhood. We did not meet Jessica that night. Which made me happy, but I am still a little apprehensive about Benjamin's feelings about her.
Ben entered his house. Carla and I went to mine. As I opened the gate, I looked toward Ben's house. He was at the entrance, he beckoned to me, and I did the same.
My mother had left the room light on. We tried not to make a noise; we did not want to wake her, mainly because we had not arrived at the agreed time.
"Marcos is a shit!" Carla said as she sat on the bed.
"Why do I think Ben still thinks about her?"
"I'm sure he thinks more of you," I sincerely hoped my friend was right.