Audrey grabs my hands crying.
- Grandma... I'm sorry you had to live that.
- It was many years ago... The next thing I remember is myself running to the gas station and entering the bathrooms. I didn't want to see anything or anyone. I didn't say goodbye to Alice and Krist and Dave, who I hope they have already met with Kurt. I just wanted to be alone, I had completely lost everything and nothing tied me to stay in 1993, so I preferred to return to 2017 and try to continue with my old life, but everything changed radically and when I realized that I worsened everything I thought about committing suicide myself as well. I deprived the world of Nirvana's latest album among other things and I took Kurt off an entire year of his life. I played with the past and everything went worse. I was completely alone, since my house wasn't what I thought and nobody was in Seattle.
- But you got ahead...
- I know. Sometimes I wonder how I did it, you know? But I'd never tell you that I got over it, because I didn't. I still cry for him when I remember or when I see his face like I'm seeing it right now on your shirt. He was undoubtedly the best thing in my life, he gave me my best days and he showed me that a person can fill you completely. His voice is something I can never forget, his heartrending cries and his calm voice when he whispered. His aroma of tobacco and cheap deodorant... I can't deny that I miss him and I apologize every day before going to bed.
- Who knows this story?
- Only you.
- And why didn't you tell anyone else?
- Because I wanted to forget it, I tried to pretend that nothing happened, but the image of Kurt in my head tortured me every night and my death hurt every day more. That's why I decided to shut up and save all the pain, because I knew that no matter how much I told it, no one would believe me and the few who did it would't understand me.
- And do you feel better now?
- Yes, but especially because I know that in two weeks I will meet him, and that's the only thing I want...