It was close to 12 in the night when the four of us arrived home. I waved goodbye to Troy and Violet before shutting the door softly. The boys were standing near the foot of the stairway with uncertain expressions dancing across their faces. I knew what they were waiting for. I gave them a small smile and gestured upstairs. With identical grins, the three of them raced up to my bedroom. I smiled at their receding backs. It struck me time and again that these were my boys and each time it felt like a bolt of lightning awakened my entire body. As I moved to switch off the lights and head up to bed I noticed a letter sitting on the coffee table. It was fancy and, emboldened in bright gold letters at the center, was my name. I already knew what the letter was before I'd opened it. It brought back memories of a more innocent time. Nostalgia pressed down on my heart as I traced the letter with a sad smile.
It was a formal invitation to the family Christmas dinner that my grandfather was hosting next weekend. It had been tradition to send out formal invitations despite the fact that we were family. Nonno always said that it made the event more special. I suppose this dinner would be special either way. The entire family would be meeting for the first time in years. I could hardly remember them all as more than just a blur of faces.
I turned the letter over and over in my hands. For the first time in awhile, things were going right in my life. I was so afraid my mother would ruin the fledgling relationship the four of us shared. It had been evident that she'd disliked them. The dislike had been mutual. Should I invite them to come with me or not? Was it more trouble than it was worth?
"Roe?"
I turned to Mikhail who'd come downstairs looking thoroughly confused. He glanced down to the letter and his brows furrowed in confusion. Before he could open his mouth to speak, the other two boys came downstairs as well.
"Is something wrong," Ivan asked. I shook my head slowly and refused to meet their eye. I wanted these boys there, to introduce to all my family and my grandfather, who they hadn't even met. But I knew I'd be met with disapproval from some of the older members of the family. As liberal as some of them were, I doubted they would approve of our relationship. Not to mention my mother who would no doubt spur some trouble.
"It's an invitation to the family Christmas party next week." Ivan and Alexei looked befuddled but Mikhail immediately understood. He gave me a tentative smile as he took my hand in his.
"Roe if you want us to come we'll come. If you don't then that's alright as well." I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding. Why did I get so stressed over such little issues?
"I want you there but I can't promise that my mother will be kind. Also, some of my family may not approve of what we have." All three boys mulled over my statement as they remembered their disastrous first meeting with my mother. Finally Alexei seemed to reach a conclusion.
"It's alright darling. Besides, I doubt it could get worse than the first time we met her. As for the rest of your family, I'm sure we can manage. It's just one dinner." Alexei said with a laugh. I smiled falsely. I knew there would be some sort of conflict on that night but it was settled. They would come to the dinner. With them, I could handle any accusations thrown our way. As they turned to head back upstairs I stopped them once again. I didn't want to end this day on a sour note. I suppose this was a good time as any. They all spun around to face me once again with slightly annoyed expressions. After all it was extremely late in the night.
"I got these a while ago. They're keys for each of you, to the house. I suppose since you guys live here anyway it would only be fitting." I didn't know what to do with my hands, my face, anything as I handed a key to each of them. They looked like I'd just proposed to them. Then again, this was a pretty big step in our relationship. Maybe I'd rushed this. I felt an embarrassed flush warm my face and neck.
"You don't have to use it if you don't want to. I just figured since you basically live here you might want those," I blabbered nervously. Silence for a heartbeat and then I was wrapped in three sets of arms. I let out a muffled laugh full of relief as I buried my head in Mikhail's chest. I wrapped my arms around all three of them. I could feel their growing excitement like a live current between us. They drew back with radiant smiles shining on their faces and a hint of amusement as well.
"I guess we're like a proper family now," Mikhail said with giddy excitement. I felt like a child and an adult at the same time. The excitement and the significance of the moment came rushing to me all at once.
"Mikhail did you really need a key to prove that? We were a family long before this," Alexei said, shooting a wink in my direction. The memory of our moment in the forest rose in my mind and I fought to keep a blush off my face.
"Okay that's enough sentiment. Let's get to bed," Ivan said with a roll of his eyes as he put an arm around me to lead me upstairs.
"Goodness Ivan you're going to scare her with how eager you sound. At least try to behave like a gentleman," said Alexei with a smirk. Ivan looked like he wanted to drop Alexei off a cliff.
"I meant to go to sleep you fool. Now come on," Ivan snapped. Amusement danced in those green eyes though. Alexei slowly trudged up the stairs with Mikhail at his side. Ivan and I followed, with his arm tightly wound around my waist. He leaned down near my ear just as we reached the door to the bedroom. I noticed with surprise that he'd already hooked the silver key I'd given him on to a small necklace that hung around his throat. It dangled between us and I resisted the urge to play with it. Ivan's large palm slowly tilted my head up.
"Alexei was right you know. I am no gentleman." My body flushed entirely red as those green eyes radiated an intense longing and evident desire. He made no move to hide the way he felt. My throat suddenly felt too dry. My face felt like a burning fire. My gaze flickered down to his lips for a brief second before looking up. With one last lingering glance he released me and entered the bedroom. After taking a moment to cool down, I followed him with shaky legs and my heart in my throat.
After finishing my shift at the rec center, I took Troy's car to the park. Nonno was already waiting there and he gave me a beaming smile. He looked much better than the last time I'd seen him. He'd put on a bit more weight and his cheeks seemed rosier. The dull haunted look in his eyes was gone.
I slowly approached him with apprehension running through my veins. His opinion of my relationship with the boys mattered. I'd been confident before that he'd only want me to be happy but now I wasn't sure. He wasn't very open-minded and he had enough troubles to deal with.
"What's wrong sweetpea," he asked as soon as I sat down next to him. I couldn't meet his eyes. I swallowed the huge lump in my throat and spoke in a voice that barely carried.
"I'm in a relationship Nonno. We met at school and I, I'm really happy." I carefully kept out the fact that there were three of them. It would have to be one baby step at a time. I looked up at Nonno and he had a small smile.
"If you're happy then I am to. I would like to meet this boy though. Did you ask him to come to the Christmas dinner?" He looked at me expectantly and I felt the urge to disappear into thin air. Perhaps I should have mentioned there were three of them earlier.
"I have and its, well there are actually three of them." I was met with complete silence. My nonno looked like I'd just shot him. I felt the sudden urge to cry. I couldn't lose him over the boys. I wanted his approval so badly. I'd already lost my mother's. I needed him to see how special these boys were to me.
Nonno looked deep in thought. I started talking to fill the painful silence stretching between us.
"Their names are Mikhail, Alexei and Ivan. You'll love them Nonno. I promise you will. They're incredible people. They understand me Nonno and I really really like them." I stopped my pointless blabber when Nonno finally looked up at me. He looked like he'd made up his mind. I waited for his verdict with my fists clenched in tension. I'd never wanted anything more than for him to take my side on this. Otherwise dinner would be an even bigger disaster than it was already bound to be.
"I want to meet them Roe but if they truly make you happy, then I don't have any problem. As for the others, I'm not sure they'll be kind." I nodded as I remembered the time my great aunt Aurora threw a fit when she realized my cousin Adamo got engaged to another man. There had been more than one broken plate that night.
"I've warned them so it should be alright. How, how's mom?" I hadn't spoken to her since that night she'd stormed out of the house in anger. My grandfather's face brightened considerably.
"She's much better. She's gotten involved in all the preparations and she seems happier than she's been in awhile. She's back home at a more reasonable time as well and she's even made dinner a couple of times. I think she's really changing." I felt a smile stretch across my face. She was changing. That's all I'd ever wanted from her. Perhaps she'd even learn to accept my relationship as well. One baby step at a time, I thought in my head but my heart still raced in anticipation of seeing her again.
I wanted my mother back. The woman who my life would always revolve around no matter what she did.
"I'm glad she's doing better," I managed to choke out as I felt happy tears squeeze my throat. My grandfather put an arm around me and I buried my head in his shoulder.
"She was looking through some photo albums the other day. She stopped at all the pictures of you and your father and just stared with a small smile." My sobs became slightly harder to hold in and my heart squeezed to the point that it was painful. It hurt to be away from her.
"I love her Nonno. I always will." My grandfather clutched my even tighter. He didn't say she loved me in return. Neither of us knew what went through the woman's head, let alone her heart.
"I know sweat pea. I know. I love her too," was all he said in return.
Their relationship is progressing! I know the boys already lived at her house anyway but I figured I'd make it official in this chapter. So yeah! They've officially moved in! Also, who here loves Nonno? He's gotta be one of the best grandpas ever.
I'm also setting up the next big problem coming up. Let me just warn you that a lot of stuff goes down when the boys and Roe go for the Christmas dinner. They still have some time left though. The next chapter is an emotional roller coaster and I think you guys will like it. Roe reaches a few very very important revelations.
If you liked this chapter, don't forget to vote and comment below. Until the next chapter...
Love
-ASH
P.S. Happy December! It's the most wonderful time of the year <3