I'm not happy about how things went down.
I'm peeved, frustrated and unsettled. It's admittedly more than that, but I'm trying futilely to stomp down my anger at the whole thing.
The kill itself wasn't done badly and it isn't that the kill didn't feel just, because it had every element that it needed to give Miranda the karma filled death she deserved, thanks to Alex's quick thinking, that is.
What felt wrong about it is the fact that I didn't exactly have a hand in it. Aside from pulling all of the facts together to pin her, I hadn't done much else to nab her. Alright, yes, I did plan it meticulously to ensure we found her at work, that way we would be be able to follow her home rather than me having to pull more strings to get that particular information from friends of mine.
Speaking of, I should plan a catch up with Justine soon. She had generously taken time out of her busy schedule to offer me a hefty distraction when I was struggling on my own. She is such a great friend. I smile gently to myself, counting myself lucky to have some great support behind me. I'm not blind to the relationship that has built between us since Alyssa has been out of the picture. Perhaps Alyssa was part of the reason that Justine and I hadn't gotten quite this close beforehand. Alyssa was selfish when it came to me and my time. She wasn't the sharing kind and when it came down to it, she only wanted to do things with me when it suited her. I hadn't exactly seen these qualities in her when we were close. I'd been completely ignorant to them.
I suppress a grunt of annoyance at myself.
My heads a mess. One second I'm thinking about how I felt like I barely had a hand in the kill, then I am thinking about Justine being a good friend and the next second I'm thinking about how shitty of a friend Alyssa was. Though she hadn't always been so terrible to be around or to be friends with. Once upon a time, she was the type of person you wished was your best friend. I don't know how long her killing spree went on for, but it must've been a decent chunk of time and that might've been where everything started to fall to bits between us.
Again, I've lost track of my thoughts, diving shakily backwards into the past, creating more chaos in my already distorted brain. I grumble to myself and force my mind back to the task at hand, trying to keep my thoughts from Alex taking what was mine.
I shut down my erratic train of thought and focus.
Because as I stare down at my desk, sitting prominently before me there is a pile of papers desperate for my attention and if I keep getting sidetracked mentally like this then I'm never going to get through them. I rub my eyes with the balls of my hands forcefully and refocus my sights on work.
The moment doesn't last long, I look up and see that Jane is walking with a purpose towards me and I know it's too late for me to make a run for it so I sit in waiting, dreading what nonsense she has to tell me today.
So, I'm not in the best of moods. Not even close.
"Hey Danica, crazy day huh?" She looks around her, staring at the people hustling around the office, trying to get their work done quicker.
"Hey. Yep, crazy." I respond and smile forcefully.
Jane lifts a hand to her hair and picks up a single strand, twirling it as she begins to speak, "So, I came over because I noticed that you seem kind of distracted today. I thought we might head out of the office for a coffee? Think of it as a breather. What do you think?"
It's not a terrible idea. I guess I could suggest that we wait a little and see if Justine is free too, that way it won't be awkward conversation and perhaps Justine can help me deal with Jane's exhausting personality.
"Sure, sounds great, but do you mind if I see if a friend of mine is free too? Only if that's okay with you."
Jane nods enthusiastically, "Of course! The more the merrier, as they say. I'll be back in a few minutes, give you some time to make a call."
"Thanks." I say, watching as Jane cheerfully walks away.
I pick up my cell, find Justine's number and wait while it dials through.
On the fourth ring, the line picks up, "Hey Dan, how you going?" Justine says in a happy tone of voice.
I clear my throat, "Good, good. How are you?"
"I'm good too. So, I take it Alex is back?" I can almost hear her smiling down the line.
I grin, my original annoyance dissipating at her reminder, "Yes, he's back. Thanks for being there for me when I doubted everything."
"What are friends for? Anyway, what's been going on with you? How is Alex? Is everything back to normal?" She rattles the questions off in quick succession as I listen on amused.
"How about I tell you over coffee? You free?"
"Definitely. I mean, not exactly, but I'll make time for this. Ready now?" I can hear her shuffling papers in the background, clearly busy but wanting to find the spare time for her friend.
I smile, happy she can come along, "Yeah, I'm ready now, but I'm bringing one of the girls from work, she actually suggested we go out and I asked if it was okay if I called you. That alright?"
"Of course, how about we meet at Urth?"
"Got it. I'll let Jane know, we will leave shortly."
I wave at Jane, who perks up at her desk and then stands up swiftly, making to walk over to me.
"Great! See you gals soon then. Catcha." Justine hangs up straight away as I set my cell down, watching as Jane closes the gap between us. I quickly grab my purse and turn the screen on my computer off, getting ready to leave.
"Justine is in, you'll like her, she's really friendly." I say, then I stand up.
"I don't doubt it, where would you like to go?" Jane asks, she has her purse already in her hand, her delicate, pale pink painted nails gripping the black studded purse. Today she is wearing a pleated black skirt that sits just above the knee and a white, short sleeved button up shirt, a pair of black pumps finish her look. Jane always dresses well, forever classy and proper.
"Justine said she would meet us at Urth."
"Oh great! I love that place." Jane says perkily, eager to get going as she begins to walk to the elevators across the room from where my desk is. I follow behind, looking forward to seeing Justine and finding out how her new job is going.
We arrive a short while later, I glance around expecting not to find Justine so soon, but there she is, sitting in the far right back corner, staring at an iPad and typing quickly on the small screen, clearly still busy and unaware of our arrival.
"That's Justine." I say, pointing her out for Jane to see. "Follow me." I add, making my way over to her.
When we are almost upon her, Justine looks up and smiles brightly at me and then glances briefly at Jane, who returns a smile.
"Hey Juss." I say, taking a seat beside her.
"Hey Chick. And hello to you too, friend of a friend." Justine says, letting me know I hadn't introduced the two women yet.
"I'm so sorry! Justine, this is Jane from work, and Jane, this is Justine, one of my longtime friend's." I swallow down the fowl taste in my mouth at the statement, now that she is technically my only longtime friend left.
Justine notices that my words have set me off kilter and pipes up. "Jane, it's so nice to meet you. I hope my being here isn't a bother."
Jane shakes her head animatedly, "No, never! I love meeting new people. You can never have too many friends." She smiles cheerily at Justine as she takes a seat opposite her and then picks up the menu, giving the unusual meeting a calm and comfortable feel.
"Have you ordered?" I ask, glancing over to the main counter that is bustling with staff and customers.
"Not yet, I told the staff I was waiting for some friends." Justine then rises from her seat, "What would you ladies like to drink? Coffee, tea, hot chocolate?"
I stand up quickly, "Don't be silly. I'll get it this time."
Justine waves a hand nonchalantly, "Nonsense. Sit your ass down, I've got this." Then she grins at me, daring me to argue.
I don't bother and sit back down. "Fine. I'll have a latte. Nothing fancy."
Jane orders the same and a few minutes later Justine returns.
"They said they'll bring them over. So, how long have you girls worked together for?"
Jane jumps in, ever the eager beaver, "Oh, well I've been working at the firm for about a year and a half, but I didn't meet Danica right away, it was probably a few weeks after that, but she has been a great person to chat to, it's a wonder we haven't gone out together more often, we get on well enough. I guess she seems to always be busy, doing this or that at work, if not she's always distracted with something else. You must have so many things going on in your brain, you sure seem to know what you're doing at work, always offering Peter suggestions on cases and such. Such a worker bee, this one." Jane says, pointing her thumb over at me.
The words stop flowing and I stare flabbergasted.
I'm wondering when Jane took a breath, because she didn't seem to stop to take one. Word vomit, that's what I'd call that. Incredible.
Justine nods at her. Stunned at the spew of words. I force myself not to find the moment amusing and open my mouth to speak when Jane starts up again.
"So, what do you do for work?"
Justine spares me a surprised look and I shrug, it didn't seem like something I needed to tell Jane, it's not like she could be any trouble in comparison to the serial killer that she is unaware of beside her.
"I'm a police officer, well, more so a detective now than anything, but much the same."
Janes eyes widen, "Oh, how interesting! I once dated a cop, he was always so stressed, made for a difficult relationship. What kind of detective work do you do? I know that there are different areas you could work in."
Justine looks impressed, perhaps surprised that the woman before her actually takes some information in from people when she talks so much herself.
"I'm in cold case at the moment, I'm really enjoying it. Diving into the past and the not so distant past. I'm actually working alongside some people who have been chasing down the Motel Murderer case, something feels wrong about it. A few of my colleagues have their speculations on the runaway killer, but I'm not so sure that it's that simple." She says, a serious look settling on her face.
"I had been following that story closely when it was in the news, but little has come up about it in ages. It's interesting that it's still being worked so heavily. But that's not exactly a cold case, is it?" Jane asks, prodding into Justine's business with little to no thought.
Justine doesn't seem bothered though and responds right away. "No, it's not, but the other cases that I'm focussing my attention on aren't ones that I'm allowed to go into. Sorry. It's a rule of law. Which I'm sure you guys understand. But I can say that what I'm working on is keeping me busy and one of which is ongoing."
"Ooh! Sounds absolutely juicy! Your work must be so exciting! And yes, we get the legalities." Jane rolls her eyes, as though abiding by law is a joke.
I sit in silence, watching as the two women continue on with their conversation, my own attention waning.
My thoughts always run rampant when talk of cases comes up. Especially with Justine involved. I know she is a brilliant detective and I wouldn't want her getting anywhere near me and my experiences.
Though as I think about it, there are probably hundreds of cases that have gone cold over time and if it were me, I'd be digging deep into the older ones, wanting to find the evil fuckers before they died and escaped punishment. Because no brutal murderer should get a pass from the punishment they deserve.
And that is precisely why I kill.
::::::::::::::::::::::::
Sounds like Danica is a little lost at the moment, her heads all over the place. She is confused and annoyed at losing the kill, but also, she has reminded herself of the reason behind her severe blood thirst and it's truly not an awful reason to kill. This is not me condoning it, by any means, though haven't we all thought of killing someone for one reason or another?
I sure have. Still do.
On a lighter note, right at this moment I am much further ahead than I've been in a while! Yay! Exciting!
Writing has been easier, smoother, less stressful and delightful for me of late, good news for you guys and for me.
Thank you for reading and voting and commenting, if you do.
See you all soon!!
Shantelle 👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻😀