Saturday, December 7
I have waited so long to hear his voice. Fuck, I've imagined it, hallucinated it even... So why am I freaking out? I have no idea. It might have something to do with the fact that I probably should've worn more deodorant, my hair has to resemble a birds nest, and he's here.
Not to mention my wings are threatening to shoot out at any second.
Aw, fuck.
How long has he been standing there? Did he watch me kill that demon? Fuck, what if he already saw my wings... Will he say something about it?—
"What a pleasure to see you again."
I pull myself from my never-ending line of questions and focus on the man in front of me. The smile has gone from his lips but he gives nothing away as he watches me. I decide to play along.
"The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Styles."
The corner of his lip twitches but that's it and the space between us fills with tension. He takes a step towards me and stops, pulling his hands from his pockets.
"You've been in Seattle for weeks."
It's not a question.
"Yes."
How does he know? The Hunters have been careful to conceal my presence in Seattle. I'm only sent out on kill-strikes and my team has protocols regarding hiding any signs of me. And because Beau is the leader, he is very thorough. Very.
I can't sense anger on Harry though, and that freaks me out more than anything. He actually seems... distant. Like he's here, staring at me, but his mind is somewhere else all together. I prefer his anger to this. Anything other than this air of... indifference.
"You're different."
"You knew I would be."
My voice is strained as I struggle to keep my wings in check and I shift uncomfortably. That doesn't escape his notice and he raises a brow at me, tilting his head slightly.
"You're nervous."
I click my tongue in frustration.
"Can we stop stating facts about me. How did you find me?"
I have to know. It's eating at me. Beau is always so careful...
"I will always find you."
"There you go stating facts again." The air rushes from my lungs and I plead with my eyes. "Please Harry, I need to know."
His eyes narrow and I can tell by the hard set of his jaw that he is fighting to keep calm.
"It's none of your business and not the important topic right now. Why the fuck have you been hiding from me?"
The strain from keeping my wings in is exhausting and I know if I start an argument with him I won't be able to hold them in... So I let the topic slide for now but this conversation isn't over and I will figure it out.
"I didn't have a choice."
I blink and Harry slams into me, pushing me roughly against the wall. The length of his hard body covers mine and... it's just as I remembered it, better even. It's like Paradise and my fingers ache to tangle themselves into his hair. I resist though and instead ball them into fists at my sides.
The fire in his eyes burns through me and I can't help but relish at the familiarity of it all. Me pressed against the wall, Harry angry and in my face— I hope this conversation ends like the others did... Particularly with our clothes off and his body covering mine— His expression suddenly shifts and his brows come together in calculation.
Fuck, I don't know how much longer I can hide my wings... especially with him looking at me like that.
"I can feel something on you..." He observes. "It's almost like a deal, but different... Tell me, what have the Hunters made you vow?"
Of course he knows. I don't even bother asking how because Harry just seems to know everything— and when he doesn't know, he finds the answer. By whatever means necessary. It's one of the things I both hate and admire about him.
I know what I'm going to say will piss him off but I don't have any other choice, so I say it anyway.
"I can't tell you. I can't tell you anything."
I make sure to really stress the last part so he gets the hint. He does. And I was right, if he wasn't mad before, he is now. His eyes completely lose their color and his breath hisses between his teeth. His accent deepens and he speaks slowly,
"I want something to be crystal fucking clear." His large hands wrap around my hips pulling me closer, if that's even possible. We're practically one body and even though he's mad, it feels so right to have his hands on me.
"You make deals with no one. Understand? Especially the fucking Hunters. You do not belong to them and I won't have you making them any promises. Period."
"I did it to save you." I reason, throwing as much conviction behind it as I can muster.
"Save me?" He laughs darkly, humorlessly, and shakes his head.
I hold my breath as he leans towards me and his stubbled cheek scratches softly against mine. I bite my lip to suppress the moan threatening to burst from me and it's almost painful now to keep my wings in. They ache to break free and communicate with both Harry and I, but I continue to hold them back.
"I. Do not. Need. Your. Protection."
He says each word slowly and despite the softness of his tone, there is something menacing about it. It pisses me off that he acts like I'm incapable and I'm about to tell him to fuck off but a deep growl rumbles from his chest, cutting me off.
His hands tighten possessively and I nearly lose my shit when his teeth nip my ear.
"I burned without you." He says, pressing a kiss to my jaw.
It's like he's stabbed me in the fucking heart. My chest reflects the hollowness in his tone and it aches for Harry's pain.
"Did I not promise I would always return to you?" He asks while his lips continue to explore my neck, my jaw, the corner of my mouth... everywhere except my lips. The one place I'm aching for him the most, other than— Damn it, he's distracting me on purpose and it's fucking working...
"You did..."
I don't see how that's—
"Did you not believe me?"
"What are you... ahhh."
My eyes roll as his hands move my shirt up slightly so that they can caress my skin. Despite the chill in the Seattle air, his hands are warm and butterflies batter my insides violently.
"I know they have my talisman, Aurora. What else would they have that could control you? I could sense your power from the moment I saw you."
I lean away from him so that I can meet his eyes. Something sparks behind them and his lips curve slowly into a taunting grin.
"I've noticed how strong you've become, Love. I've really fucking noticed." My breath catches at the clear admiration in his tone but he isn't done. "They cannot have you anymore. You are mine. Talisman or no, you're not going back there."
It's like a cold bucket of water has been dumped over my head. I stare horrified into his unwavering stare and know that it will be hard to reason with him. He's made up his mind and is willing to banish himself from Earth to save me.
"Don't you love me at all?" I demand, angry that he could be so selfish.
My question catches him off guard but he keeps himself guarded. I tilt my chin defiantly. Two can play this game...
"The Hunters have tortured me, beaten me, and submitted me to their will, taking everything they can." His hands tighten painfully on my hips but I don't stop. "If you love me at all Harry, you won't do that to me. I can fix this. I've waited three months to see you and I'm not about to wait the years it might take for you to find a way back to me."
I can see the gears turning behind his conflicted eyes. The seconds slow as I wait for his response and I'm so lost in him that I almost don't hear the screech of tires not too far away.
My eyes widen and because Harry and I are so in-tune, he hears it as well. I watch the green of his eyes pale as he listens to them now too. The car stops a few blocks away and several Hunters hurry out into set a perimeter.
Harry's breathing quickens at the scent and—Fuck. I clutch his shirt in my fists, urging him to focus on me once more.
"Niall and I have a plan," I rush to get the words out. "I just need more time."
"Niall lives then."
He sounds distracted, like he is only half paying attention to me but his eyes remain on mine. I clench his shirt tighter.
"He's helping me. I can save you. I can save us all, please just let me."
I lose hope of any good outcome the moment his jaw sets and wait for his final "no"... but he remains silent. I can tell he really just wants to throw me over his shoulder like a caveman and take me with him. He also wants the Hunters to find us so he can tear them apart and then take me with him.
If he does either one of those things, I'm fucking screwed. Everything Niall and I are working for will have been for nothing. Beau would find me here and— just the thought of Beau hurting Harry has my blood boiling, but at the same time... I don't think I would be particularly happy about Harry killing Beau either.
Beau is my friend. Hunter or no.
The van is close enough now that I can hear the chatter of Hunters inside it and my heart plummets. I shake his shoulders violently, silently pleading with him to hear and understand me.
His eyes close and he leans into me, inhaling deeply as if savoring my new scent. One of his large hands travels slowly up my body, dragging fire across my skin, to tangle into my hair. He uses the leverage to lean my head and place a kiss on my neck.
"You get until the end of the year. That's it. Just the thought of one of them laying a hand on you..." He takes another deep breath, this time to calm himself. "And we need to meet. We have a lot to discuss."
That doesn't sound good... I tighten my hold on my wings and do my best to keep a straight face.
"When?"
"Later tonight. Find a way, or I'm coming to get you. Understand?"
I want to argue but there is no time so I nod instead. He returns the gesture and then his lips come crashing down on mine.
My entire body suddenly ignites and every nerve is alive with electricity. He claims me with his mouth, devouring, tasting, savoring... I can't help but sigh like a kitten and melt into his arms.
I have never missed someone so much.
Ever.
I'm so enthralled by the feel of his lips against mine that I don't even notice the surge of Magick that runs through my veins. Harry stiffens suddenly but hips never leave mine as we are both pulled into my mind.
A thousand memories and thoughts float around us but in seconds we are sucked into one in particular.
Fuck.
Harry releases me to watch the scene before us unfold and I try with all my might to pull us out of my mind but it's no use. Shaw approaches me in a fine light blue suit, his eyes are filled with malice as he frowns. He had ordered me to release my wings but I refused, informing him that I'm not his "puppet". With a snap of his fingers, two large armored men seize either arm and Shaw leans in close. He spits in my face and reminds me that I belong to him and the Hunters...
I close my eyes from the painful memory but it continues to play on. I remember Shaw had never brought up Harry until that night.
Shaw told me that even if I were to return to the Knight of Lust, he wouldn't want me. Without my angelic abilities, I'm nothing more than a pathetic human. A fleeting light in the vastness of eternity. Only Shaw saw me for what I really am. A puppet. His puppet. To obey and serve his every command. To make sure I remembered my lesson, he had my hair colored to match his. That way every time I look in the mirror, I think of him and remember that he is the puppeteer. No one else.
The ache in my chest returns with a vengeance and the link to reality is enough to finally pull Harry and I from my mind. Harry's shoulders heave with fury, anger radiating from every pore. His eyes don't meet mine and I catch my breath both from the sharp stab of pain in my chest and the fact that my wings are about 2 seconds from snapping out.
His hunter green eyes snap to mine and the possessiveness in them makes my heart hurt. Looking into his eyes is different now, it's like I can feel his emotions. It must be the bond because Niall has shared memories with me multiple times and I've never been able to read him the way I am able to read Harry right now.
Harry wants to confront Shaw and make him bleed for even thinking that I am his. Then he wants to torture him, over and over again. Like he did the judge who executed his mother and sister before he became a demon.
But he's also confused about what just happened. How did he invade my mind that way... and can he do it again. He wants to know everything about my time with the Hunters. Everything.
His breathing slows a little and he steps towards me so that his body is pressed against mine once more. One of his large hands caresses my cheek and I lean into it. There is so much love and adoration radiating from him... I didn't think it was possible to love someone this much. To crave someone the way that Harry does me. I will never be worthy of him. But I will spend my entire existence trying.
I jump at the screech of tires that are much closer this time. Shortly after, the slam of doors opening and the soft thud of boots against the pavement. Harry gives me one last look. Telling me again how much he really doesn't want to go and then that his threat to come get me tonight stands. I answer with a quick peck to his lips and as soon as its over, he Travels.
I take a minute to compose myself and then quickly snap into action. I whistle to alert Beau and the guys to my location and draw my sword. Beau is there in seconds and looks between me and Nathaniel. He frowns.
"You know you're not supposed to engage unless the team is here."
I laugh.
"And you know that I'm not just another team member. We better hurry though, I could've napped in the time it took you to get here. The healing process has started."
Beau frowns, clearly unhappy with my lack of compliance. He strides over to me and grabs my hand, squeezing tightly.
That's when Harry lets me feel him. His dark aura radiates fury and slams against me so hard that I nearly gasp.
"Next time, just wait. Can't lose our best soldier."
I gently remove my hand from Beau's and try hard to ignore the jealous Knight of Lust behind me.
"Better start clean up. Shaw won't like it if we're late."
Beau doesn't argue.
If there is one person in this compound that hates Shaw more than I do, it's Beau. He knows that should we come back late, I will be the one who suffers. 'I'm better than them', 'I'm divine and divinity is flawless'... Those are the "lessons" he teaches me and after the last time... I shudder.
It was the worst punishment of them all. We were out on a mission and the demon we were hunting caused an uproar among the public, drawing attention to ourselves. That's a huge no no. No one saw me and we have guys on the inside at the police station but it didn't matter.
Shaw put me in a dump tank with only my underwear and bra, wings out. He stood just outside the glass, lecturing me about "my" failure and pressed the buttons on the remote over and over again. Click! The top panel of the tank lowered, forcing me underneath the surface, and held me there. I pounded against the glass furiously while my wings fought against the panel, trying to lift it. My lungs would start to hurt from holding my breath and after I sucked a mouthful of water into my lungs... Click! The panel would lift and I would dash to the surface, gasping and coughing.
We did that over and over again... for hours...
It was Beau who finally got him to stop. Reasoning that if he wears me out too much, it'll be days before I'm healed enough to go on a mission.
How fucked up is that?
Beau's sharp command to 'move out' cuts through my train of thought and I sheath my sword, dashing to the van. The team loads up in a matter of seconds and within a minute we are back on the road.
Harry makes his presence known, letting his aura surround the van. I knew he would follow us and I'm kind of glad that he will at least know where I am. However, I'm not so glad that if I don't find a way to sneak out tonight, he will come get me.
A part of my mind begins forming a plan while the other part is listening to Beau who is chatting about why it took them so long to show up. A teeny tiny section can't stop worrying about what Harry is going to say tonight.
He is going to demand to know about every detail of my time with the Hunters. Which would be as painful for him to see as it would be for me to relive it.
Then there is the fact that he kept pointing out how different I was. Over and over. That's definitely not good. I already worry I'm too different... being with him today was the most I've felt like myself in months. And being alone with him there is no way I'll be able to keep my wings hidden all night...
Aw, fuck.
Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in the muscles.
All the love.
-A