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Fink - Looking Too Closely
"Put your arms around somebody else
And don't punish yourself,
The truth is like blood underneath your fingernails
You don't wanna hurt yourself
By looking too closely."
HOLDEN WAS AT PEACE WHEN HE THOUGHT OF ELENA. When she smiled, he imagined himself being somewhere warm, and when she glared at him playfully, he wanted to go and kiss her.
But he couldn't. Because she loved another, and that another was his brother.
Everyone were preparing for Founder's Day as Holden was looking around when he saw Stefan standing alone, waiting for possibly Elena. "Reminiscing old times?" he commented as Stefan was in 1864 clothing.
"What are you doing here?" Stefan questioned him and Holden stopped next to him before looking around.
"Waiting for Jade," he admitted with a small smile and Stefan furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "She's the female friend I've been talking about."
Stefan nodded his head. "Also, why wouldn't I come here to eat cotton candy, and see what Damon is up to?" Holden chuckled lowly, but Stefan didn't smile.
"Don't start with me, Holden," Stefan mused calmly and Holden knew he was still mad after learning the truth of Holden loving Elena.
"Listen, she said it, I didn't," Holden sighed deeply and Stefan turned at him with a brooding face. "She's not Katherine. I don't want to start the same feud you and Damon did with her."
"You're right," Stefan nodded staring somewhere. "She's not."
Holden followed his look and saw Elena approaching. She was wearing a beautiful dress, her hair curled. She looked strikingly like Katherine, but that didn't make Holden see Katherine. She was still Elena, gorgeous and sweet.
Elena smiled to the two brothers with a small smile as they both stared at her in awe.
HOLDEN WAS STANDING AMONG PEOPLE, WHO WERE READY FOR THE PARADE WHEN JADE APPROACHED HIM FROM BEHIND AND KISSED HIS CHEEK. "Hello, loner boy," she chuckled and Holden smiled at her before she moved to stand next to him.
"Glad you showed up," he commented looking down at the woman, who had her hair straightened that day. She smiled and when no one was looking, kissed him gently on the lips.
"And for a little local history, Mr. Saltzman's students recreated Virginia's Battle of Willow Creek," Carol Lockwood commented and all the floats that were going around.
The float arrive in the street. Jeremy and Tyler were in it as they waved to the crowd and pretended to shoot each other. "Hated that year," Jade commented and Holden raised his eyebrows at her. "I've been longer than you imagine."
Holden smirked slightly then turned back to watch the parade. "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our stunning Miss Mystic Falls Court and their handsome escorts!" Carol exclaimed.
Elena, Stefan, Matt, Caroline and the rest of the Mystic Falls Court and their escorts were on the float as they laughed and waved. "This is Caroline Forbes, Miss Mystic Falls. Aren't they beautiful?"
Elena noticed Holden talking to a woman and knew she was the one from their call. She lost her smile for a second and had no idea why she felt upset that Holden had another woman. "She's beautiful," Jade commented and Holden didn't answer. "Shouldn't you be up there? You were her escort..."
Stefan heard Jade say that and frowned sadly from his place. "Nope," Holden sighed noticing Stefan's look and he sighed.
"Let's get outta here," Jade suggested and he nodded his head with a smile so they walked into Mystic Grill before sitting down on a booth.
Jade grabbed the menu and opened it casually as Holden watched her. "What is his name?" he then questioned curiously causing Jade to look caught.
She didn't look at him at first so he took the menu out of her hands and looked at her seriously. "Why are you acting like this?" Jade asked him and Holden raised his eyebrow.
"Me? Because it's you, who's acting all weird," Holden told her with a sigh then took her hand in his. "We don't know each other very well, but I want to. I can't protect you from whoever you're running away if you don't tell me about him."
Before Jade could answer, Elena walked in, wearing her modern clothes. Holden's eyes went to her and Jade rolled her eyes slightly.
Elena's eyes caught Holden and Jade and she walked over to them. "Hi," she said to Jade, who just waved back with a suppressed smile and Holden glanced at Elena. "Well, I said hi, I'm gonna go."
She started to walk away, but Holden quickly got up and grabbed her hand. Elena turned around and her eyes went to his hand on hers. "Did you want something?" he asked her, still confused by her behavior.
Elena glanced back at Jade, then pursed her lips. "I know that Stefan is worried about our friendship," she mused and Holden nodded his head. "And that concerns me too..."
"Did Stefan tell you something weird?" Holden asked, getting quite uncomfortable but Elena just shook her head. "Okay. Look, I'm not Damon, I won't do all the flirty comments and that eye-thing that he has. I won't make you regret that I'm your... friend," he looked down at her with a slight smile.
Elena smiled too and moved closer weirdly to hug him. They both were a mess before they finally hugged. Holden placed his arms around her back and Elena tensed at that before they pulled away.
She gave him a smile one last time before walking over to Jeremy. "I don't believe that we can fix this. I lied," Elena told him with a pleading look as Holden listened. "I was wrong. But you're my brother, Jer, and I love you, and I have to fix it. So just tell me, what can I do?"
"You go to hell, Elena," Jeremy sneered as he got up and started leaving the Grill. Elena seemed clearly upset causing Holden to clench his jaw at the young boy.
Jeremy was angry at Elena for keeping away the secret of vampires, but Elena did it for a reason. "He's a weird kid," Jade commented from behind Holden and he ignored Jade's comment before following Jeremy outside.
"What the hell is your problem?" Holden asked angrily, raising his hands to the sides so Jeremy stopped and turned around to see Holden approaching.
"What?" Jeremy snapped angrily and Holden stopped close to him.
"You do not get to talk to your sister like that ever again, Jeremy," Holden had no idea what he was doing, but the fact that Jeremy was talking to Elena so coldly, made Holden's blood boil. "Show her some respect, kid."
"You're a dick!" Jeremy snapped back and wanted to walk away but Holden quickly appeared in front of him while using his vampire speed. "She erased my memories of everything I knew!"
"I erased those memories!" Holden sneered angrily and Jeremy took a step back. "She did nothing but help you, Jeremy, what is wrong with you?"
"What are you gonna do? Kill me cause I hurt Elena?" Jeremy asked him lowly and Holden pulled away with an angry look.
Then Stefan arrived with a stony look. "What is going on, Holden?" he asked then glanced at Jeremy, who clenched his jaw at Holden. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah," Jeremy nodded dully and Holden let out a fuming breath. He wasn't one of those to start a fight with humans, but the boy was clearly just mocking Holden.
Stefan sighed deeply while looking at his older brother. "What my brother is trying to say is, don't blame Elena for this. Damon turned Vicki, I killed her. She was a threat to you, and she was a threat to your sister. I'm sorry that it happened, I wish that it hadn't."
"You shouldn't have made me forget..." Jeremy mused to Holden, who didn't look back with a calm face, so the Gilbert boy walked away.
"Why all of a sudden you put your nose into their business?" Stefan asked Holden angrily and Holden just looked away. "Holden, you're not Damon, and I don't want to fight with you."
"Then don't," Holden answered with a fake smile and Stefan knew where all of the anger was coming from.
Holden felt overwhelmed by everything that was happening. He was in love with Elena, also met Jade, also all the news about John and Isobel, Melanie's dying memories, and Stefan's blood outburst. "Holden..."
But the older brother didn't listen, just walked past him and back into the Mystic Grill. He grabbed Jade's hand and started dragging her outside. "What are you doing?" she questioned and when no one was around, Holden kissed her passionately.
Jade kissed him back and pulled away. "What happened?" she asked in confusion as to where all the roughness came from.
Holden didn't say anything as he sped them towards behind the Mystic Grill and pushed her towards the wall. His kisses were tough and mean, but she didn't mind it one bit.
Until, Jade slowly took out a syringe full of vervain and injected Holden with it. He felt the effect and pulled away from Jade with shocked eyes.
She pushed him off of her and he fell to the ground. His body felt weak and he had no idea why she did that. Holden had felt vervain before in his body, and nothing hurt more than the herb that was rushing through his blood, paralyzing every single inch of his body. "Why..." he managed to say and Jade sneered at him.
"Because you killed my friend," she answered and Holden realized something and groaned from the pain.
DAMON QUICKLY APPROACHED STEFAN AND ELENA. "Where's Holden?" he asked them angrily and grabbed Elena's hand.
"What are you doing?" Elena furrowed her eyebrows angrily and Damon looked at her through narrowed eyes.
"Saving your life. Where the hell is Holden?!" he snapped then saw the confused looks of he couple. "Fifteen words or less... Tomb vampires are here. Founding families are their target," he mused and pushed Elena slightly towards Stefan. "Get her out of here, now! I'll try to find Holden."
He then started leaving. "Wait, what are you doing?" Stefan asked him and Damon didn't look back.
"That's more than fifteen words, Stefan."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I KILLED YOUR FRIEND?!" Holden snapped as he still lied on the ground, groaning from the vervain.
Jade walked up to him and stood over him with a dark face. "You're strong. Usually vampires go off when injected with vervain," she mused, and she sounded completely different as to when he met her. "You don't remember me, do you?"
Holden glared at her, telling that he didn't and Jade just crouched down next to him. "Bummer. You were good in bed, but you love another. Tell me, dear Holden, how could you fall in love with Katherine's look alike?" she asked and Holden stared at her in shock.
"Who are you?!" he sneered angrily and Jade rolled her eyes before standing straight and walking a bit away from him.
"Melanie was my friend," she admitted causing Holden's bones to go chill. He then remembered the small blonde girl, always walking close to Melanie. But she was younger then, so that's why Holden didn't remember her. "Until you murdered her in cold blood."
"You lied," he told her coldly, actually hurt by her. Jade shrugged. "You weren't running away from anyone. You were looking for me."
"Clever boy," she teased and Holden rolled onto his back before staring up at the sky. "Did you like it? Draining her out of blood?"
Holden didn't say anything as he clenched his jaw. Jade had hurt him completely to a point he was ready to be killed. Not only did she reminded him of who he was, also she told him things he felt the moment he drank Melanie's blood. "I remember I was the one who found the body. It was horrible," she continued her ramblings but he didn't listen to her. At least, tried not to. "She was paler than usual, dark bags underneath her eyes, bloody dress."
"Enough," Holden told her quietly and Jade scoffed before taking out a stake. He glanced at her with hateful eyes. If he liked her once, that was long gone.
"You didn't answer my question, Holden," she sighed and crouched down besides him once again. "Did you like it? Killing my only friend, your fiancé like that?"
Holden sneered, then used all of the power to stand up and throw her against the wall. Jade hit it and fell down just for a second before moving with vampire speed to kick Holden in the ribs.
He was still weakened by the vervain so he was back on his knees again, trying to catch breath. "Just say it already and let me avenge her death!" she shouted angrily, wiping her bloody lip. "You killed her, Holden. You took away someone I adored, someone you adored! She loved you and you killed her."
"What are you trying to prove here, Jade?" he asked her, raising his head up. Jade was standing in front of him with teary eyes. "You won't feel better if I tell you that I did like it. I did like the taste of her blood."
Jade's hands became fists soon after and Holden looked up at her face. "You want me to say it so it would bring you strength to kill me, right? Because it's harder for you to kill me now, cause you like me. Didn't work out your way, did it?" he asked her and Jade clenched her jaw. "Well, guess what, I hate myself for what I did to her, but one person... one person made me realize that I shouldn't be living in past..."
Jade rolled her eyes expressively. "Let me guess, Elena?"
"No," Holden shook his head and she raised her eyebrow. "It was Stefan," he said then attacked her.
But before he could rip her heart out, something made them both hear an incredibly loud noise, causing them both to scream and hold onto their heads.
The two vampires fell to the ground still hearing a loud screeching noise. It felt like needles were stinging his whole body and he couldn't stop it.
"There's more here!" someone shouted and rushed over to the two vampires.
Holden felt vervain in his body again and passed out shortly after. The last thing he saw was Jade being taken away.
"HOLDEN...." someone touched his cheeks. He smelled smoke and warmth radiate through his body before opening his eyes. A weak looking Damon was staring down at Holden. "Phew," Damon mused with a smirk.
Holden sat up and saw the building they were in going up in flames. "What the--" he asked angrily and groaned before standing up.
"John Gilbert activated the invention," Damon commented and Holden almost fell to the ground but Damon caught him. "Okay, buddy," Damon groaned, trying to hold Holden up.
"I thought Bonnie--"
"Nope. Liar," Damon answered and Holden noticed Anna's dead body lying down. "No time for pity party."
"Holden!" Jade's weak voice rang out and the brothers turned her way. She was lying down and trying to extend her hand towards Holden.
Damon saw the look on Holden's face that held fury. "She tried to kill me," Holden explained angrily causing Damon to widen his eyes. "She is Melanie's friend. Thought that avenging me would make her feel better."
"Well, then, leave her," Damon mused dully. "We have to get out of here."
"Please..." Jade's shallow voice called out again and Holden seemed torn.
"I'm not you, Damon," Holden told his older brother than started to approach Jade through flames. Jade smiled in relief and Holden stared at her coldly.
He wasn't a mean person. Holden knew he couldn't live with himself if he left her like that, even if she tried to kill him for something that happened so long ago.
Before Holden could reach her, a beam fell down in front of him, causing Jade to catch the flame and start burning. "Ahhh!" she screamed as Holden watched with wide eyes with Damon by his side.
"We have to go or we'll end up like her!" Damon hissed with shocked eyes. All Holden wanted to do was help a woman that he thought liked him. And now she was dead. "Holden, let's go!" Damon saw how Holden wasn't moving as he just stared at Jade's burning body.
Damon could've just left him to stand there and die, but even in his cold heart he had a place for Holden. A very big one.
They went through a lot, went to war together, killed for each other, so with such history, Damon wasn't ready for his baby brother to end up in flames. "Holden, please!"
Holden's eyes snapped at Damon and he finally nodded before they started making their way towards the door. Another beam fell down in front of them.
Outside, a panicked Stefan ran towards the emergency door but Bonnie arrived too. "Hey, you can't go in there!" she shouted as Stefan opened the door. "The fire will take you out."
"They're my brothers, Bonnie!" he yelled back because he knew Holden must have been inside too. He couldn't lose both of them, apart their differences and all the fights, they were still the three Salvatore brothers, destined to live forever.
Stefan went into the building and tried to open the door, but the doorknob was too hot. He hissed.
Bonnie was still looking at the building with wide eyes when Elena arrived. "Stefan!" she called after and wanted to run inside but Bonnie grabbed her arm.
"Elena, you can't go in there!" Bonnie yelled.
"Bonnie, what are you doing?" Elena questioned, hurt by her friend's actions.
"I'm sorry I lied to you," she then closed her eyes still holding onto Elena's arm and began to recite a spell. "Ex spirtium intacullum, in terrum incendium, fes matos salvis arisdum!"
Stefan was finally able to open the door but the fire was too large for him to go in. The flames diminished since Bonnie was chanting the spell. He marched inside and looked around to find both of his brothers next to each other.
"Come on!" he picked up Damon first then looked at Holden. "I'll be right back, brother! Please, hold on!"
He vamp-sped outside and placed Damon on the ground. "Wait, I have to get Holden!" he yelled to Bonnie, who nodded and continued the spell.
Stefan rushed back inside and picked up Holden before leaving the burning building. Bonnie stopped the spell. "Bonnie... Bonnie, what is it? Are they gonna be okay?" Elena asked in deep worry.
Then, Stefan and Holden both came out of the building. Holden was burnt as he coughed loudly. "Oh my god!" Elena breathed out as Holden fell to the ground, breathing heavily.
Stefan kneeled down to both of his brothers as Elena went to help all three of them.
HOLDEN WAS SITTING ON THE BENCH, WHERE HE HAD PREVIOUSLY MET JADE. He couldn't think of anything else, but how bad she made him feel.
He thought he was actually through that already, but old wounds opened and he couldn't do anything to mend them. Stefan walked out of the Grill and saw him sitting on the other side of the street.
Stefan approached him slowly and sat down on the bench next to him. "Damon told me Jade was a liar," Stefan commented in some kind of sympathy.
Holden didn't answer as he just stared down, blinking occasionally. "She was Melanie's friend," he sighed then and looked at Stefan. "How did I get to this point where random vampires try to kill me?"
Stefan laughed slightly and looked away. "I think it's the extra package that comes with being a vampire. Other vampires hate you," he answered calmly and Holden smirked. "I'm glad your okay... As much as I hate the fact that you like Elena... I'd never leave you or Damon to die."
"Same here," Holden told Stefan, feeling slightly better. "You know, as much as Jade made me remember the past, I don't feel as bad now as I always did."
"That's good to hear," Stefan nodded then stood up. Holden hesitated to speak but then did.
"I'm sorry, Stefan," he sighed and Stefan turned back to look at him. "For being such a disappointment to you. For always leaving you."
Stefan just stared back at him and Holden stood up. "Because I won't do this ever again, brother. I'm done being this coward, not ready to face his brothers. I'm a vampire, and I have to live with it." he told Stefan, who smiled.
Holden patted his shoulder brotherly then rushed away leaving Stefan to smile.
ELENA ARRIVED BACK TO HER HOUSE, HOLDING HER DRESS WHEN SHE SAW HOLDEN SITTING ON THE STAIRS, OUTSIDE. "What are you doing here?" she asked him curiously.
Holden stood up and she slowly climbed up the stairs. "Let me take this for you," he smiled and took her dress before placing it on the chair.
"Thank you," she said weirdly and Holden stared at her confused face.
"Before coming here I uh..." he commented then laughed and Elena smiled too. "I knew I was going to leave soon after. I couldn't stand Damon. But after tonight... He saved me. He showed good. And that doesn't happen very often."
Elena just shrugged and she was acting weirdly causing Holden to grow suspicious. But he still didn't believe it wasn't Elena. "Why do you sound so surprised?" she asked.
"Well, Damon isn't the best brother, but tonight he kind of was," Holden told the girl he fell in love with. "And Bonnie saved us, because maybe along the way you decided that I was worthy enough to be saved. Thank you."
"Well, you are," Elena said calmly and Holden touched her cheek softly. Elena looked down at his hand and looked back at him. She inched closer and Holden saw the need on her face.
She wanted to kiss him. And he did too. "As much as I'd love to kiss you, Elena, I can't do that. We can't," he said pulling away from her with a sad look.
Jenna then opened the door and saw 'Elena' and Holden standing close to each other. "Hi," Elena told her aunt, who eyed Holden.
"Holden," she greeted with a smile and he backed away from Katherine completely. Jenna looked at her 'niece'. "Say goodbye and come back inside, okay?" Jenna smiled then closed the door.
Katherine, still pretending to be Elena nodded with a smile, turned back to Holden to see him already gone.
Holden didn't know that he almost kissed Katherine, and that the bitch was back in town.
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End of Part I...