Hey folks!!
I'm back again. Well feeling proud over the progress of One Step Closer 😍😍😍
Thank you for support and love
Well here is the next part, sorry for delay. My college had started and there is already lot of pressure of studies which made my already slow speed much slower 🙈🙈🙈
Well before start reading next part, check out the song above, I guess it is the well suited song for our hero 😍😍
PS: I'm in love with the entire music album of Rustom. How many of you loved it?
What kind of love you wanted our to be?
The one like the star which could enough to fill the darkest sky with its glory, the one like the shimmering river which is enough to soothe our hearts, the one like the rays of golden sun, which is necessary to start our days, the one like the brewing cup of your coffee which made my day happy, the one…….
Ansh…….you are stupid. You bought my coffee in your confession. Such an idiot you……
Shh…..the one like your heartbeats Avni…….I want to fill the place of your missed beats, I wanted to fill those empty place in between of your fingers, I wanted to be one who witness you till you sleep from the time you woke up. I wanted to be the part of your life Avni. I wanted you to make me the part of your journey.
Is the time right? What if we regret later? What if you regret it later? We are different from each other Ansh.
But opposite do attract love. And trust me the day I regret on our love will be the last day of your Ansh. Today when I saw you struck in between fire I realised the importance of you in my life. Life is unpredictable Avni and before anything happened to me I wanted to spend some moments with you. I wanted you to feel the love you read only in novels.
Ansh………….
Let me finish please…….will you give chance to this fellow to be your life partner? Avni Bharadwaj will you marry this idiot?
I will be a fool if I reject such beautiful proposal. I love you idiot Solanki.
I promise to cherish you forever………….Until my last breath.
Forever is nothing but a lie……….. fuck!!!!!!! I ruined that forever which bind my wife to me. I'm nothing but a fail. Empty mind is the place of the thought, pools of the memories. Often it's said that empty mind is the reason behind human destruction but sometime only that empty mind is the reason behind the figuring out the reason behind problems. After hearing Dr Shabana words, his mind was unable to believe it where his heart was screaming him to believe over the lady words. If I loved her more then myself, then why I ended by hurting her?
Sometimes it's impossible to answer questions of your own.
Sometimes there is impossible to justify the reason behind the actions. In life even a situation came which made us hard to justify us and sometimes there is no chances of getting things back. The only regret remains back………
Dejectedly, he switched off the lights and moved towards his room only stopped back at the hallway seeing his wife stood silently in front of wall. He moved near her with slow steps and found her gazing towards the frames on wall. The disgust filled his senses in next second seeing his wife beaming face, the pictures were enough to define their life, at once I was the reason behind your smile and today I'm the same man who damages you beyond repair Ansh mind spoke to himself seeing Avni stood with teary eyes.
“Chalein?” the warmth of her husband hand made her came out from her thoughts. Soon she found him wrapping shawl around her. She was unable to understand the meaning behind the sudden blast of emotions between her, as soon as her eyes met with her man, the bottled emotions hovered over her again and the tears again started to crawl from her eyes.
“Hey, it's ok. We are not supposed to cry over everything, right?” Avni felt her husband hand patting her back, the warmth which always sooth her, the warmth for each she carved long. “Tears were same even that time too Ansh, then why you chose to ignore me that time, why?” Ansh who was supposed to settle his wife comfortably over bed froze hearing her words. Lifting his gaze he found his wife sat with numb expressions, gazing at him.
“Why are you with me Ansh? It's a complete waste of time. You….should leave me” he felt himself tongue tied after hearing her question. Few seconds before his heart squealed hearing his wife voice but but at net moment it sank realising the depth of her questions.
“I'm a dead soul Ansh and I know that. Why you wanted to stuck with me? Why you wanted to waste your life for me Ansh? Why you don't let me die……...why? We were distanced enough to let each other go then why you wanted to change things…….” the accusations were not wrong from her.
“Because you are my wife, my love. The one who made me realise the feelings which I just read in books.” Avni felt her husband hands over her earlobe who was flicking her hair strand behind her ear. A wave of strange sensation erupted in pit of her stomach after so long. She reached at the point where his presence remained no longer affected to her but today was something different, the touch on the softest part of her body was able to make her weaker. She drew sharp breath to remind herself about the circumstances and decided to pay heed on his words.
“You must wonder where life landed us. You must cursed me,haina?”
“No…….no. Why you ask…..asked”
“Because I know you Avni. Even I wonder where life landed us. Until I never believed over tragic changes in life, as these things only happened in Bollywood movies but I never thought even stories do come from us. I know I'm sounding diplomatic or better said scripted but my words are true. I know broken can't be fixed but it could be repaired. I want you to give us a chance Avni, a fair chance. For us, for me, for…...for our marriage. These six-seven months taught me so many things Avni, they made me realise the value of relationships, place of wife in marriage. I thought marriage is sufficient to bind two people's togther but seeing you on hospital bed that day I realised what precious I lost. I know you don't need me Avni, I know you are enough capable to lead your life by own but I need you Avni, I do need you. Avi……”
“I'm broken Ansh. I'm good for nothing….not….not enough to be your wi..fe why y…..ou….”
“Shh…….why you think so Avi? It's not you it's me who is not enough capable to be your husband. It's me who spoiled everything Avni. Will you give us a chance Avni?”
“I don't know…….I'm…...I’m tired of everything. I just want to close my eyes...for…..ever” the hands which cupped his wife face until started to feel weak now, Ansh felt like someone slapped hard on his face. Until now he just read about the word broken but only today he able to realised the intensity behind the word.
“No….no please No. Don't say like this Avi. Please……”
“Leave me Ansh. I'm not good for you….”
“No I won't. Stop saying rubbish”
“Please Ansh.”
“No”
“You will spoil your life Ansh.”
“I already spoiled yours, what left now”
“Ansh…….”
“Please don't loose hope Avni. You can't stop, we need to walk together to cross this hurdle. You are my fighter”
“I'm not Ansh. I won't be able to walk more”
“I promise I won't leave your side till end Avni. I need you”
“But……”
“If you utter one more foul word then I won't think for a second before………..”
“before?” he felt his tongue tied another side, did he still had rights to show his anger over her? He looked in her eyes which were staring at him, in hope of answer. His heart still wanted to show his possession over her but his mind knew he lost this right long back. All these months he was happy thinking that their stumbled marriage came on track but today seeing her defeated he realised until now he was dragging the dead soul along him.
I promise I won't allow you to give up Avni! I don't know about our future but I will try my best to make your every day bright.
Promising himself he kneeled down in front of her, pale moonlight made his eyes focused over her, surely she lost her appetite, but his heart still wanted to study every contour of her face. He moved his thumb over her cheeks and wiped the rolling tears which were crawling out from her eyes, “promise me you will never think about ending your life”
Avni stiffed feeling his hot breath over her eyelids, the hands which were rested on her lap now rested over her shoulder, she felt his breaths which were mingled with her. Slowly opening her eyes, she faced her husband face who kneeled in front of her with closed eyes, she loved to gaze his face but today she frowned seeing his cheeks wet with tears, “Why are you crying”
“Because it hurt me to see you vulnerable. I never thought my little mistake will cost so much to our life. Promise me you will never think about ending your life” Avni closed her eyes in next second feeling her husband thumb who was tracing her face
“Why are you doing all this?”
“Because I love you. I don't know why but I'm unable to go away from you. Probably this is the only thing which I said honestly all time.” the next Ansh knew he found his wife head resting against him, he didn't knew the pooled tears in their eyes was of pain or happiness but that was something soothing which he saw in the past days.
“It's cold outside. Let's go”
“I'm still not feeling like to sleep” Avni murmured seeing Ansh who was busy in arranging pillow for her.
“It’s ok if you didn't want to sleep, just lay down with me” her lips curved faintly and soon she rested her head on her husband chest. The warmth of her husband against her body didn't lessened her tears but indeed it was something her heart wished secretly.
***********
A forgiving heart makes for a beautiful marriage
-Anonymous
Someone said each morning always bring new hope, a new life for us. Avni always love to gaze the golden rays of sun, people's always ran behind the artificial treasures but they forgot to spot about the natural one they had. Her heart always thanked her husband for purchasing the particular east facing flat in society, the view of greeting sun in the morning was enough to made her day. She covered her mouth to stop yawn and again gazed at the bathroom door which was still closed. The voice of running shower even after 20 minutes made her chuckle, shaking her head she took seat on the swing chair and closed her eyes.
“I expected you on bed”
“Weather tempted me so came outside”
“Haa…….monsoon arrived finally. Now soon our Pune will become another cherrapunji” Avni chuckled hearing Ansh sarcastic comment and leaned her body more. She heard voice of dragging of chair from distance which stopped near her.
"Get a shirt Ansh" Avni chided seeing her husband stood in front of her with bottoms.
"Aah.....enjoying the view!!"
"Stop acting cocky and ya I'm enjoying the view" Avni gestured towards the rising sun which made Ansh chuckled. He dropped his towel at railing and made his way towards bedroom.
The morning was indeed good today........
Later that morning, when Avni was done with her coffee she sat over the couch and started to flip the channels aimlessly. Ansh who came out from bathroom after dumping soiled clothes narrowed his eyes seeing his wife sat silently on couch. He was happy with her progress but at same time this was not the progress he wanted, there were many things he need to do.
Try to divert her attention, she need distraction. Try to engage her in some random works. It will help her in positive way.
Dr Shabana words rang in his mind. Sighting he brushed his hands to the back of his trouser and moved towards his wife, "so what will we do today?" Avni who was flipping channels aimlessly stopped hearing his voice and looked at her husband after dropping remote. "I didn't get you"
"Ohho......I meant as you looked better today so I thought to do something different today. You have something in your mind?" Ansh bit his lip seeing her all silent.
"Well leave it, I'm hungry now. Did we had something to eat?" Ansh spoke without glancing towards his wife and started to rumming through cabinets. From corner of eye he saw his wife changing posture, from numb to tense, tense to thinking. "Yaar I'm hungry. Help me Avni"
"Coming.....coming" Avni jumped from sofa hearing another loud voice of Ansh.
"See most of the containors are empty. Avi it's first time after our marriage since I saw containers empty"
"I'm sorry Ansh. You wait for sometime let me think something for your breakfast" Ansh smiled inwardly seeing the glimpse of his old wife who never allowed him to stay empty stomach. A marriage could change your life for 360° angle, Ansh always admired Avni for her various qualities and one of them was her giving nature, even after not having much knowledge of cooking in starting days of their marriage she always took care of everyone needs. Annapurna of our family.
"Ansh their is bread in fridge, will it ok if I cook bread upma for you?"
"Perfecttt.......but make it fast. I'm damn hungry" Avni simple nodded hearing Ansh affirmation and started to crumb slices of bread. Back in old form, Ansh who decided to accompany her in kitchen amused to see her in old self, for that few moments he saw the glimpse of his old wife but soon his trance got broke when he heard Avni stammers, "Ansh....wh...at I do n....ow?" Ansh who was enjoying her old self till quizzed his brows seeing his wife hands which were trembling.
"I do......nt remember", Ansh looked over the vessel and found it on gas along the crumbled pieces of bread at other side, "but you always cook it na"
"I.....I know but....."
"I guess now you need to fry chopped onion and tomatoes along cumin seeds" the hands which worked confidently until we're trembling now, he found her forehead covered with sweat beads. It's common for patients of depression to sweat or tremble over small things. It happened because they lost their confidence from small and simple things.
"Avni leave it. I will take care of it, come with me." Turing off stove, Ansh took Avni with him and started to rub her back, "I'm sorry. I'm....even...unable....to fe...ed you proper......ly"
"It happened Avi. It's OK." Ansh absentmindeadly peaked Avni's hair, although he was present with her to console her, but who will going to come console him?
The next she opened her eyes, she found herself curled over couch with covers over her body. A light groan escaped from her throat realising her head which was still throbbing. She tried to focus her vision but the place was no longer brighter like morning unlike it was dark. She rolled her eyes again in order to search the little source of light, the peeping light from the thick curtains caught her vision and soon she spot the person whom she wanted to spot from very second she woke up. With the help of her knees, she slowly crawled at the other side of couch and trailed her finger over his hand which laid carelessly over the couch. She again started to feel the wetness against her cheeks which was dried from her cheeks probably because of air condition and the past few hours started to flash in front of her eyes....
How useless I became Ansh, I'm unable to cook something for you. I'm failed to.........fulfill the basic duty of wife. I......am....useless.
No you are not. Aren't I warned you last night that you are not supposed to repeat such stuffs?
Ansh I........I lost myself, I'm not longer that woman whom you got married. That girl was different who was capable to perform every duty, the girl who stood in front of you is a useless. Just leave me Ansh....
she felt her knees limb as soon as she uttered those words, a self confidence is the biggest strength for a person. A self confidence had a power to make you the winner, even if you saw yourself as a defeat. the confidence she found in herself after hearing her husband words were dissappeared somewhere and again a tired soul overpowered Avni.
"I won't let you go anywhere Avi, I already told you last night"
"Ansh their is nothing left in me, then why you wanted to stuck with me?" Avni pitch rose seeing her stubborn husband who was not ready to budge from his words.
"Because I want. Because I promise someone. I promised if I ever found her lost, then I will took her back...... back to us" the another flashes of past made her recall the promise which became reason to bind them.......
Few years ago_____
"Are you sure I'm looking enough presentable?"
"Avni you are, and stop being nervous. It's just a normal meeting. Now come. Maa won't like to see my special friend late" Avni heart fluttered seeing Ansh holding her hand. Dressed in peach and maroon colored anarkali suit Avni left no stone unturned to groom herself in perfect Indian girl. It was first time when she was going to meet her best friend family. Although they were namesake best friend but deep in her heart she knew the reason behind Ansh protective behaviour, his different ways to made her feel special. With passing day Avni was enjoying their blooming relationship, and today the day came when he was going to hint his family about his special friend. Although they didn't confessed their feelings but it's not important to say everything, gestures are enough to made aware.
"Maa Papa meet Avni. You must remembered her, she is daughter of Bharadwaj Uncle" Avni came out from daze hearing Ansh voice.
"Oh my God. I never thought I will meet Avinash daughter like this" Avni smiled widely seeing Ansh father who was welcoming her warmly. The warm behaviour offered by elder man was enough to pictureise the friendship between her father and Ansh father. "Nice to meet you beta. Make yourself comfortable. Pooja will be start in half and hour" Avni nodded hearing Ansh mother voice and looked towards Ansh who soon dragged away by his mother.
We Indian are famous to celebrate every small achievement like occasion. The Satyanarayan Pooja was especially organised for Ansh who completed his fellowship from Scotland. In the age of 29, Ansh managed to achieve so many things because of his intelligence which was the reason for Avni to made her feel proud. The time started to pass and either each passing second Avni felt like to lost herself in sight of man who sat in front of her in peach colored kurta and performing rituals.
"I hope you didn't felt bored" Avni nodded her head in negative seeing Ansh in front of her who finally came after sneaking sometime. Before they could speak more Ansh again dragged by his mother towards another side of hall. Unable to understand anything all Avni could able to read brewing tension between Mother Son duo. The situations she imagined happened exact opposite.
************
"What happened Ansh? Why you dragged me from your home? You didn't even let me meet with anyone"
"I don't want to talk about that"
"But your grumpy answers won't help either"
"Fine.......Maa figured out everything"
"Fig.......what figured out?"
"Stop acting naive Avi. You know what I meant. You know about our relationship and my stand too. You will be the only one who will become my wife and Maa figured out and assumed things in her own way"
"Calm down first and tell me things in details"
"She told she won't agreed for our alliance as the working daughter in law are not ideal daughter in laws. She wanted me to marry someone from her kitty group, you remembered the girl who sat beside me during pooja, she is Shalini with whom maa fixed my alliance and I'm telling you I'm not going to marry her. She always did like this, always took decisions on everyone behalf and expect us to agree over it. I decided if she didn't agreed for our marriage then I will marry you in court"
"And you think this will be the best idea for us?"
"Obviously. What you wanted me to do then? Agree with Maa and marry to that Shalini?
"Done? Will you care to hear me now?"
"Fine"
"Ansh she is your mother, the one who gave up her whole life just for you. Don't you think your such decision will put shame over her values? Ansh they are our parents, our elders they won't decide anything which will hurt their children. And your such decision will only hurt them.”
“And what about you? About us? Won't it hurt you if I went away from you? And even your parents are agreed for us then why can't mine?”
“Ansh because we are humans but we are individual, we are same yet different Ansh. We all belong with a different ideology, different thinking and that's what made us different from one other. You can't expect same from them just because they are your parents. This is not your mother stubbornness, this is a generation gap, difference in beliefs. You need to make her understand”
“What if I loose you by that time? What if you went away from me?”
“We haven't confessed yet but still…….”
“Then I will say today, I love you Ms Bharadwaj and you are the only one with whom I want to spend my rest of life. I know you are not ready for it but I promise I won't force you for that” Avni covered her hands with Ansh palms which were either side on her cheeks. Unable to say more she took him in a warming hug, “I love you too”
“I never imagined it will propose my lady love like this, in middle of night, in the deserted roads of lucknow in my old santro. But as we said those golden words then I will gift you something, so my lady love ask whatever you want from me”
“I am afraid to loose people's Ansh. Promise me you will bring me home back if I ever lost myself”
“I promise I will took you back…….back to us"
Avi I'm just asking you to have little hope, I'm asking for little courage nothing else. Awake that last ray of hope and trust me we will win……….
“Promise?”
“Yes…...I love you Avi and I mean it”
“Are you feeling better now?” Avni leaned back to the pair of arms which wrapped around her.
“Yeah…...when I slept?”
“You slept while sobbing but I'm glad that you managed to grab peaceful sleep for an hour and half. That's a pretty good change”
“Umm….Ansh I was thinking if you had time…….can we go out for grocery shopping” Avni noticed a wide grin on her husband lips which was more than enough to convey his happiness. Soon she feel herself dragged by him in their bedroom, “take shower and get ready. Today we will rob the store”
Taking steps forward is important, it's not important to take large one. So many small steps could also cover distance, the most important thing is to take steps………..
So how was this chapter?
Share your valuable views with me.
Will come up with next part sooner
Have a great day to all 😄