| October 27 | Friday Night |
I stood alone at the end of the bar, watching Quinton and Sara work their magic. They were doing great. And although the bar wasn't packed, I knew they wouldn't need me much at this point. No. My job now was to make sure the customers were having a good time, which was something I was getting much better at.
Or maybe my bullshitting skills were improving.
I paced next to Sara. "Doin' okay?"
"Sure," she stated as she poured a beer.
Quinton was currently schmoozing money out of a group of guys.
"Actually, could you restock?" Sara asked. "I would but..." She looked at her needy customers. "I'm a little tied up."
"Yeah sure," I agreed.
Honestly, I was just really bored.
I checked the fridge and took note of what they needed before making it to the storage. I couldn't help but allow my mind to linger to Charlie and Megan who were probably at home together. The thought brought a smile to my lips.
Until I got a text from Megan herself.
It read: "In need of alcohol. Heading to Jinx."
I frowned and tried to remember if Megan had said if there was anything important today that could possibly put her in a bad mood. Not that I figured she needed an excuse to drink, but it wasn't something she did. Like ever.
I responded: "Bad day?"
But she didn't answer before I had to get back with the supplies from storage. Guess talking would have to wait till she got here.
I rejoined Sara and Quinton in the front, restocked and waited for my girlfriend to show. I was eager to see her. I hadn't seen her since this morning, but I was nervous to learn what had put her in a bad mood.
Then before I knew it I saw her walk through the door.
I smiled, but the look on her face was discouraging. I couldn't remember the last time Megan had looked so disappointed.
She took a seat at the bar.
"Gin and tonic." Her sad blue eyes found mine. "Please, babe?"
I raised a brow. "Sure?"
I began to pour, but when I stopped Megan protested.
"No, keep going," she encouraged.
I allowed a little more alcohol to fall into the cup, which earned Megan's approval. It honestly looked at if she was having an existential crisis, which I learned wasn't uncommon for college students.
I slid the drink over to her as I leaned forward.
"Do you wanna talk?" I coaxed.
Megan took a strong sip before flashing a cynical smile.
"There's nothing to talk about," she said. "Just that my whole plan to earn my doctorate is a waste of time and money, according to everyone but me."
"Why would they think that?"
"Because it's true," She traced the rim of her glass with a manicured finger. "I had a conversation with a few colleagues and then asked my advisor what my chances were after graduation of scoring a job..."
She took another sip.
"I've been busting my ass, driving myself crazy..." She laughed. "For nothing! For absolutely nothing."
At the information, I realized I didn't know what to say, and usually when that was the case I knew that there was probably nothing I could say to make the situation better.
So instead I poured Megan a tequila shot.
"Well..." I placed a lime next to her shot glass. "You can be my professor any day."
This got her at least to smile, which let me know I was helping, even if it was only a little bit. I knew this was a dream of Megan's, but learning this was crushing it. All I could do was help her cope.
She threw back the tequila and sucked the lime like a pro. I couldn't help but find myself impressed... and a little turned on, but now wasn't the time.
Then she looked at me and gave a sad smile.
"I love you."
I tilted my head. "I love you too."
She fell silent in thought. I hated seeing her like this. Maybe she didn't know what to do, which was a shock considering Megan always had a plan. I figured trying to talk to her more wouldn't hurt.
"Look..." I took her hand. "You can still get your masters. It's just one more semester. And then after that, you can figure out if you wanna keep going."
"But there's no point."
"There is if you want to, Megan."
She took a sip. "I mean, I can still teach high school."
I smiled. "Yeah, but I'm sure you're not confined to teaching, right? You can work with museums, write journals... You're a decent writer. I feel like the opportunities are endless."
She raised a slim brow. "I'm a decent writer?"
I gave her a timid smile. "You're a great writer."
She stared into her almost empty glass with a somber expression. I recognized it as Megan coming to terms with reality. Then she looked up.
"You're right," Megan said. "You're so right! I can do whatever the hell I want with my life!"
I looked around nervously at Megan's outburst. Sara was giggling at the end of the bar, along with Quinton. I gave them an eye-roll.
"Who the hell wants to fight with the U.S.'s horrible education system, anyway?" she continued. "Cuts here, cuts there... it wouldn't even be worth it at the end of the day."
Okay, maybe I shouldn't have added that extra alcohol in her drink. But I couldn't help but find humor in the situation.
Megan threw her hands up. "And I sure as hell don't wanna be in school for another three to four years!"
"But you're gonna finish your master's, right?" I wondered.
"Oh yeah, definitely." She swallowed the last of her drink. "I didn't come this far to leave with nothing."
I nodded to the empty glass. "Want another?"
"Sure," she agreed. "Why not?"
I smirked as I poured her another, without the extra alcohol, this time. As much as I loved drunk Megan, I knew in the state she was in, it wouldn't be a good idea.
"You should take this one slow," I suggested as I slid her the drink. "I don't want to have to carry you out of here."
She smirked. "You would love to carry me out of here."
The heat rushed to my cheeks. Okay, Megan was definitely buzzed already. She was such a lightweight.
"Maybe..." I teased. "But I don't get off for another four hours."
"That leaves me plenty of time to get myself really wasted."
I shook my head. "In your emotional state? I don't think that's a good idea."
"You're probably right." Megan sipped slower. "I might start crying on some stranger's shoulder if you fix me another one of these."
"Then I guess this is me cutting you off," I teased with a smile.
* * *
"You didn't drive here?" I asked Megan as we made our way out of Jinx.
"Nope," she said.
"You were planning on getting this wasted all along, weren't you?"
"Yep."
I couldn't help but laugh to myself as I guided Megan to my car. She climbed in and I joined her after shutting the door behind her. When I took my place in the driver's seat, I allowed my eyes to look over at her. She still looked sad as ever. I felt my heart pull.
My hand slipped into hers. "Meg..."
"I'm so drunk right now."
"I know."
She fell quiet.
"Are you okay though?" I wondered. "Like, really okay?"
She stared forward and exhaled a deep breath. The yellow light from the street poles danced over the contours of her face. It made her look even more sad.
"I just feel like I've wasted a year and a half of my life, pursuing something that's nearly unattainable."
I rubbed my thumb over her hand and wished I could make this better. Instead, I just started the car and made my way home.
When we got back to the apartment she changed, curled up with Charlie and laid in bed while I showered.
Megan was great at making me feel better on my days where nothing seemed to go right. I had always tried to do the same, but this was something I had no idea how to fix. I couldn't do a thing about it. How was I supposed to cheer her up?
I exited the bathroom and joined her in bed.
"Megan..." I whispered.
She slowly turned over to face me.
"I have an idea..." I proposed. "And you have to be honest when I ask your opinion."
Her head just nodded against her pillow.
"What's a place you've been dying to see?"
The question got her thinking, so I gave her a minute.
"Hmm... I've always wanted to see Colonial Williamsburg in Virginia."
I smiled even though I had no idea what that was.
"Then how about we make a deal..." I started. "You focus on getting your masters, and I focus on planning a trip to Virginia."
"You're gonna plan a road trip?" Megan teased.
"If that's what you want," I said. "We can hit up all kinds of historical sites and stay in interesting motels and eat at small town diners..." I watched her watch me. "You can keep journals of our traveling adventures. Use your excessive knowledge on American History to add to what they know... What do you think?"
Finally, a small glimmer of light appeared behind her sad eyes. I couldn't do anything about her disappointment, but I could offer her something else to look forward to after graduation.
"That sounds like a great idea." She smiled. "But what about Charlie?"
"Blair and Tony can watch her for a while, she loves them."
"And paying for it?"
"Don't worry about that," I stated. "I'll figure it out."
Her hand reached up and cupped my face before she pulled me into her. Our lips met and she smiled into it. I felt my chest light up.
Our foreheads remained touching as I held her close. There was nothing I wouldn't do to make Megan happy, even if that meant bearing through lectures about history. If it pleased her, then I would take one for the team, happily.
She pulled away. "You have yourself a deal, Sam Carson."