Hey all, thank you all for all your comments and votes and all my new fans, i just love reading all your thoughts. I now have a little more free time and will be up loading faster. I do have the next two chapters writen up and will put them online tomorrow.
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Chapter 16...
Luke was gone when I got back downstairs, I was filled with relief and annoyance all at the same time. Relief that I didn't have to have this conversation with him and annoyed that he couldn't be bothered to really mean what he said and just disappeared.
I made my way to the dining hall secretly looking for him and again been disappointed when he was nowhere to be seen. His absence bugged the crap out of me and in my annoyance I grabbed absently at food and hid myself in one of the back corners. Once again Luke was playing hot and cold, only this time he had run off all together. Probably my own stupid fault for thinking anything other than that he was a complete arse but even as I thought the thought I knew I was just kidding myself, I liked the idiot even though it would probably not be a good idea when it boiled down to it.
Angry at my feelings and Luke's blatant rejection I stabbed at my food, forcing myself to eat it so I could go disappear into my room and die.
Twenty minutes later a panting Luke ran into the dining room frantically looking around until he spotted me. Rolling my eyes I stared out the window over the gardens ignoring him. It was for the best anyway.
Two minutes later he sat down across from me with his own plate of food.
'Sorry I was...'
'Don't worry about it.' I cut him off.
'No seriously I had no choice you will never believe who I...'
'Luke I really don't want to know.' I cut him off again with a look of disappointment.
'Yes you do.' He growled losing patience. 'It's Mia...'
'Look, I get it ok you want to help blah blah and the thought was nice, but deep down you don't care about little pathetic girl problems, so whatever your off the hook, your free to go do whatever or whoever, for that matter, that you like, just spare me the false intentions and leave me alone ok, I am big enough and ugly enough to take care of my own shit.' I couldn't believe the words coming out of my mouth, they were absolutely ridiculous and the look on my face must have completely given away the hurt I was feeling but I simply could not get control of my emotions and to save any further embarrassment I got up calmly and left the room. As I rounded the corner I broke out into a flat sprint all the way back to my room, collapsing onto my bed face first.
'Idiot!' I screamed into my pillow as the tears streamed down my face soaking the pillow. 'That is so going to make him like you more.' I screamed banging my fist into the pillow. 'What's wrong with you?' I groaned in frustration. Why am I jealous of Mia? If he's interested in her then he really is just not worth it. 'Argh! Fraken idiot.' I screamed again. Getting up, I wiped away the tears from my face and walked over to the dresser.
'So he wants Mia, fine what do I care? He can have her, crazy biatch deserves the douche bag.' I mumbled into the mirror. I started rummaging through my bag for my phone to call Sydney, when my door crashed open, banging hard against the wall, revealing a seriously pissed off Luke. For a second I contemplated running, but pulled myself together and stood my ground, as he marched towards me kicking the door closed behind him.
'Now you listen to me, and listen good and don't interrupt for once because I'm only going to say this once.'
'Excuse...' I started.
'No just shut up.' He snapped in my face, clamping my mouth shut with his hand. 'Firstly I don't give a rat's arse about Mia Rodriguez, Coach James found me at the stairs and told me I had another member of my team joining us and that he wanted me to be there when she arrived. That's it. Secondly, I got the hell out of there the minute I could to get back to you. And thirdly I have loved you from the first day you told me where to shove it. But there was nothing I could do about it then being your Coach and then you met Noah...'
I felt my heart tighten at his name.
'...When he died a part of your spirit died with him, I get how much you loved him and I realise that a person can't just get over a love like that. I get it. I really do, I was there every day watching you fighting your demons out in the pool. I was the one who watched as you drove yourself closer and closer to the edge of oblivion. It was me that pulled you out when you practically drowned with exhaustion and sat with you as you cried your eyes out day after day...' I looked you at him in shock, I had absolutely no recollection of that at all but kept my mouth shut.
'...Then one day the crying just stopped, you seemed to push everything away, your friends, you Dad, even your emotions, the light inside you just vanished. It killed me to see you throw blank smiles at everyone, you would turn down invitations from your friends, barely acknowledging the existence of anyone around you. I don't know but the only thing that seemed to give you any peace was swimming so I had no choice but to let you just get on with it. Slowly you began letting me help you and from time to time I would seem to be getting through to you only to have those blank eyes staring back at me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to be around someone that you love only to have it thrown in your face day after day?' I opened my mouth to answer but he just shook his head.
'Don't I'm not done yet. I gave up, I know it's harsh but I couldn't take it. I got the all clear from the doctors and I was going to leave. I had left a message with Mr Ridley saying as much and then the very next morning you snapped out of it completely, I mean you nearly killed yourself again in the process. I couldn't believe it when you seemed completely unaware of how much time had passed. It was weird, everything about you just snapped back to how it was the first day I met you. When you walked out of that place with Sydney laughing at whatever lame arse thing I had said, I felt like I had won the lottery.'
'But you were leaving anyway.' I interrupted.
'Yeah I know, I tried desperately to get hold of Mr Ridley to cancel it but I had no luck for two weeks, being Christmas and everything and then when I finally did get hold of him it was too late he had already set everything up for me to leave.' He paused taking a breath. 'You of course went back to your cocky ways, pissing me off and I figured there was just no getting you so I accepted it and resigned only to find out that I would have to put up with you here too. Mind you even then my heart leap at the thought but it still pissed me off that every time I made a decision, you somehow managed to have a hand in it disrupting it or getting in the way of it. You know you drive me insane.' He sighed, shaking his head.
There was a long silence where only the sound of our breathing could be heard, with Luke waiting and me trying to get everything he had said sorted in my head completely.
'You love me?' I gasped, finally locking on that part.
'Well yes I do but I know you're dealing with all the Noah stuff and I'm not here to pressure you. I just had to get all this off my chest.'
My body moved before my mind could figure out what to do, and before I knew it I was kissing him. At first he did nothing, frozen in shock, and then he kissed me back with as much passion as I was kissing him. It's was an air gasping kiss that eventually forced us to come up for air. His eyes searched mine looking for any kind of regret, when he saw none he started looking for an explanation. I explained a minute after I let out a huge sigh. I knew this was going to be tough to hear.
'I can't forget Noah, he will always be in my heart, and his memory will always be there. But I can't deny that I enjoy been in your arms or the feel of your lips on mine. That first kiss? At the airport? I didn't pull away from you because I'm not over Noah, I pulled away because of how easy it was for me to just forget. I felt awful not mourning anymore, after such a short period of time, I still do. I mean he was supposed to be the love of my life and I feel bad for having feelings for you. It's like I was dishonouring his memory or something.' I sighed.
'It's ok Rhylee, I understand. As much as I want to be with you I can give you time.' He said smiling down at me.
'NO... No I don't want to wait; I want to be with you too.' I rushed out without caring how desperate I sounded. I just need you to understand about Noah, while he will always be in my thoughts, I do want to move forward hopefully with you, but my heart is guarded, I can't lose another person I love again.' I practically whispered out the last part as a lone tear rolled down my cheek. With a brush of his thumb it was gone, and he lifted my face back towards his.
'So are you saying that you love me too?' He chuckled.
'Maybe.' I giggled lightly.
'Well I guess I can live with that for now.' He laughed before pulling me in for another kiss.
~~~~~
Sorry it's so short but i wanted to get Luke's thoughts over just quickly for all those asking for his POV.
Hope you enjoyed and dont forget to vote.