PLEASE READ THE NOTE BELOW IT IS VERY IMPORTANT! AND IT AIN'T THAT LONG YOU PEOPLE WHO ARE LAZY!
Hi guys! I just wanted to tell you that school is starting up and I won't be able to update as often. And I'm also going to be attempting to get my Certificate of Merit for Piano, so once again, that tightens my schedual. But, being home-schooled, my schedual isn't as horrifying as people who go to public school.
But, I decided to finally give you guys a real chapter for this book, even though it's a bit short. Not one of those fillers, that I for some reason find hard to write.
So, consider this chapter, and the Filler before it, a gift! (Because I don't know when the next one will come)
Now, I'll leave you guys to your usual dosage of stupid jokes I found on the internet!
-Atsuko4517
Sasuke: I will kill Itachi, he ruined my childhood!
Itachi: Oh Waaa Waaa, go eat a Happy Meal you emo.
This joke represents all the things I wish I had thought of *Snickers insanely*
I Don't Own Naruto!
---
"N-naruto?!" Tsunade yells shocked.
"Yo." He replies, dully.
"Damn it brat! Show some emotion for once!" Jiraiya yells.
"No." Naruto says, staring at him in denial.
"...Why is it that whenever you stare at me like that it scares the shit out of me?" Jiraiya asks twitching.
"...Why do you think it's not planned?" Naruto responds, making Jiraiya's eye brow twitch in disbelief.
"Naru-chan?" Naruto looks towards the red haired woman.
"*sigh* Hebi just had to revive my parents didn't he?" Naruto grumbles, 'tch'ing in annoyance.
"So that's who Kitsune is..." Orochimaru mutters, annoyed.
"You say that as if I'm someone you despise. Which I totally understand." Naruto responds.
"I have the whole of Iwa after me after all. I mean I just killed a few hundred of their men on a mission. So what?" He continues, in a nonchalant manner.
The only response he gets it deadpanned stares.
"JIRAIYA!!! WHY IS MY BABY BOY AN EMO?!" Kushina yells, her hair lifting up into nine different parts, and her eyes literally glowing.
'How is she doing that?' Naruto thinks curious.
"U-um...I don't really think there's a real way for me to answer that..." He squeaks, his face paling to a color whiter than snow.
"I don't even think you know most of what I did in the past 9 years." Naruto says, making everyone's eyes widen, except for Jiraiya's.
"Why did you have to be so good at hiding..." Jiraiya whines.
Naruto rolls his eyes in response, and pulls out his sword.
"You going to make them attack yet snake? Or are you going to stand there like an idiot." Naruto says, making a vein on Orochimaru's head pop.
"Kill him!" He yells, stomping his foot onto the ground like a child throwing a temper tantrum.
Naruto immediately moves his sword to block a strike from a three-pronged kunai, and lifts his hand to block a punch.
'Both my parents trying to kill me. Lucky me.' He thinks sarcastically.
He breaks off the attack and jumps back, carefully surveying his new opponents.
'From what I know about Kushina, she will most likely use a brawler style to attack me, while Minato will sneak behind. But that's not it is it? There's something else, something that I'm not seeing.'
He blocks a new punch from the red haired woman and carefully observes his surroundings.
'Okay, barely any trees, and a few craters. Fucking great.' He inwardly grumbles.
As he continues blocking the attacks from Kushina he notices that Minato has seemingly disappeared.
'Ah shit. Where'd he go?' He starts to sense around, trying to find the chakra signature of his father.
'Above.' He thinks, jumping back to dodge a rasengan.
Red chains appear around Kushina, making her look more menacing.
'...Fuck.'
Naruto curses under his breath and starts to jump around once more, dodging the chakra chains being directed at him. He suddenly jumps out of the way of a rasengan aimed at his head.
'They're not showing anymore of their abilities...that's not good. If I didn't know a thing or two about them, then I might have already been injured...Just proves how deadly S-rank ninja can be.'
He blocks multiple chakra chains with his sword and twists his body to be ready to take a quick exit.
Out of the corner of his eye he can see a flash of metal, and he glances to see another three pronged kunai aimed at his head.
He pushes the chakra chains back with his sword and jumps out of the way of the kunai, preparing to block a strike if need be.
'I know for a fact that they can hold back. But the question is, if I push them far enough will they go all out?'
He looks back at his attackers and sees that they had seemed to regroup.
'Right, I don't really want to reveal anything for Konoha to use to it's advantage. And I don't really want to injure my parents, trying to kill me or not. So I most likely will have to wait for Jiraiya and Tsunade to get the snake to cancel the jutsu. Just perfect.' He thinks sarcastically.
Kushina charges at him, aiming for his jugular, and Naruto quickly punches her then following up with a spinning kick that seems to lift Kushina into the air, where he follows through with a further three kicks before appearing above her and releasing from his hand a blast of water pushing the opponent into the ground.
'Really glad those Kiri-nin taught me Hosui (1). It's freaking awesome.'
Considering chakra had been added to the hit Kushina seemed to be perfectly fine, aside from the fact that her eyes seemed to be slightly spinning.
'Damn Kuchiyose- Edo Tensei. (2) It's making their bodies heal faster. So killing them won't do shit.' Naruto inwardly curses.
Minato, finally deciding to attack, throws his Hiraishin kunai (3) at Naruto. He jumps away, eyes on the kunai.
Naruto stares at Minato wondering what the reason for throwing the kunai (4) was for, before his eyes slightly widen in shock. He had forgotten about Kushina.
He quickly turns towards where he left her and sees and empty whole in her place.
'Shit!' Naruto silently starts to disperse chakra into the ground, hoping to find the crimson haired female.
'Under!' He thinks, leaping backwards once more, dodging a chakra enhanced fist.
Minato once again charges at him, this time his fist raised to charge. Naruto punches the him twice, then palms him upward launching him high into the air. He then jumps above them and punches Minato back down. He gets ready to punch him down only to curse when Minato disappears in a puff of smoke.
Naruto lands on the damaged ground and leaps into the air once more, dodging yet another kunai throw. He lands once more and looks in front of him to see Minato with a giant Rasengan (5). Naruto glances behind his own body, having sensed chakra, and silently curses once more seeing Kushina who also appeared to be holding a giant Rasengan.
'...Why me? I really don't want to be on the receiving end of two Rasengan!' He thinks, inwardly crying tears of despair.
They both charge at him, their A-Rank jutsus ready to maim him.
"Aw, fuck it!" He yells spreading his arms out to defend himself. The two Rasengan keep moving closer until in the last second orange chains, which appeared to be similar to the red ones from Kushina, spread around him and created an orange ball of chakra. After a few seconds the two attackers get blasted away, and Naruto lets down his ultimate defense.
"Y-you have the Kongo Fusa (6)?" Kushina asks, getting up from the blast, her voice shaky from lack of control over her body.
"Yes, I do." Naruto replies shortly.
'It's not exactly the Kongo Fusa, but it's close enough. Mine might have a better line of defense, though I haven't tried chaining a Bijuu.' He thinks.
All three suddenly look out into the battlefield, staring at the screaming and quivering form of Orochimaru.
"...Looks like the justu was released." Naruto mutters, narrowing his eyes at the slight glow of his opponents.
"Naru-chan, c-can I...h-hug you?" Kushina asks nervously. Naruto stays silent, wondering if he wanted to be suffocated by a hug from his mother.
"...*sigh* Go ahead." Naruto responds, immediately regretting it as he feels the suffocating hug from his mother.
'Knew it...' He thinks, struggling to breath.
"Um, Kushi-chan, I think he's turning blue." Minato says, walking up to them. And indeed Naruto was turning slightly blue.
Kushina immediately realizes what she's doing and releases her son from the hug.
"Sorry, musuko (7)." Kushina says, her face flushing from embaressment.
"*sigh* It's fine." Naruto mutters, finally able to breath.
"Um...while we're still here, can you tell us why you're..." Minato struggles for words.
"Emotionless." Kushina finishes, looking at him plainly.
"You know, I'm not really sure myself..." Naruto responds slowly.
"Probably a combination of everything that's happened in my life." He finishes.
They look at him confused.
"Life happened." Naruto says, making show a look of understanding.
"Yeah, life can really ruin stuff..." Minato mutters.
"So...before we disappear...Do you have a girlfriend?!" Kushina asks eagerly, her eyes sparkling.
"No." Naruto says slowly, immediately noticing the sad expression on her face.
"But," Naruto starts.
"I do have a wife." He finished making Minato's and Kushina's eyes widen from excitement.
"What's her name." Kushina pesters.
"I can't tell you her full name for security reasons, but her name's Yukihime(8)." Naruto replies.
"Is she nice? Does she have any family? Do you treat her well? Does she treat you well? When did you get married? How long had you been dating before the marriage? Should we be expecting grandchildren?" Kushina asks, the sparkle in her eyes not leaving.
"Yes she's nice. She has a sister. Yes we treat each other well. We got married 2 years ago. We were dating for a year and a half." Naruto replies, somehow remembering all of the questions.
"Wait...you didn't answer the last question." Minato says pointedly.
"..." Naruto turns away.
'Damn you and your intelligence.' Naruto thinks, slightly annoyed.
"Is she pregnant?" Kushina asks, clearly hoping it to be true.
"Yes." Naruto mumbles, loud enough for them to hear.
Naruto winces when he hears a girly squeal.
"Wa-i~ Wa-i (9)!" Kushina yells excitedly.
Naruto sweat drops seeing her jump into the air in excitement.
"..." His sweat drop increases seeing his mother run back to hug him.
"I'm so happy, Dattebane(10)!" She yells hugging her son tightly.
"So...I assume your reunion went well?" Jiraiya asks walking up to them.
"Shut up." Naruto commands, the older man immediately obeying.
"Wow," Kushina starts the starts that were in her eyes appearing once more.
"How do you do that?" She asks curiously.
"I terrify him." Naruto replies.
"...I feel so proud right now." Minato says, looking at Naruto happily.
"Hey!" Jiraiya whines.
"Jiraiya, I'm going to have to explain myself to Tsunade. Aren't I?" Naruto asks the white haired sennin.
"Unfortunately. And I'm not looking forward to being nearby, which I know you'll make sure of."
"Might as well have you do the talking." Naruto replies shrugging.
Minato and Kushina's bodies start to grow brighter.
"Looks like it's time for us to go." Minato says sadly.
"Bye bye, musuko." Kushina says, her expression gloomy.
"Goodbye, Okaa-san (11), Otou-san (12)." Naruto replies, a small yet almost invisible smile on his face.
Minato and Kushina notice the smile, and their faces light up in happiness. They both disappear their Edo Tenseied bodies fading into ash.
"Now, I'm sure you're looking forward to talking to Tsunade. Aren't you, gaki (13)?" Jiraiya says, the grin on his face pure evil.
---
(1)- Water Retain
(2)- Summoning: Impure World Reincarnation
(3)- Flying Thunder God Kunai
(4)- Japanese Dagger
(5)- Spiralling Sphere
(6)- Adamantine Sealing Chains
(7)- Son
(8)- Snow Princess (Cliche, I know.)
(9)- Yay~ Yay!
(10)- You know
(11)- Mother
(12)- Father
(13)- Brat
---
Omake time!
"Hello, Kazekage-sama." Kitsune says, walking into the Kazekage's office.
"You know, you don't have to call me that. I don't want my friends to be doing that." Gaara says, turning his chair to face the mercenary ninja.
"...Do you want me to start climbing through the window or something?" Naruto asks, taking off his masks.
"...*sigh* Just don't be too respectful, Naruto. It annoys me."
"You do know I like annoying people. Right Gaara?" Naruto replies, raising his brow.
"Uzumaki..." Gaara growls, the sand hidden around the room slightly lifting.
"Right, pushing it." He mutters.