TRIGGER WARNING: Panic attack
Phil
I walk through one of the many isles in the grocery store. I pick out the items I need and place them in my basket. As I walk, I start to feel a bit...strange. Almost as if someone is staring at me. I look around and notice two heads popping out of the corner of the isle. They immidetly turn back when they see that I have caught them spying on me. I think nothing of it and I carry on. They're probably just shy fans.
I start looking for the sugar when I realize it is in the isle the two girls just went into. I sigh as I start walking towards it, hoping they are gone so that I don't have to make any awkward interactions. Usually I wouldn't mind talking to fans, but today I really don't have the energy. Plus, I feel a bit more anxious then usual.
Luck was obviously not on my side. I hear them as I get closer.
"...of course its him! Just get here quick, before he leaves!" one of them whisper yells. As I turn the corner I see that she was talking on the phone. They snap around to face me once they hear me.
Were they talking about me?
They blush and just stare at me with wide eyes. They look about thirteen years old. I smile awkwardly as I try to walk past them.
"You're amazingphil, right?" one of them asks.
"Yeah," I say.
"Oh my god! I told you!" she tells the other girl. Then, she turns to me. "Hi! We love you! We watch all your videos!"
"Aw, thank you," I smile at them.
"Can we take a picture with you?" the other girl asks, excitement written all over her face.
"Sure," I smile at them.
I can handle this.
After we take a few selfies, they are off on their way.
I continue getting the things I need. Once I have everything, I go to the self register to pay for my things. As I scan the last of the items, I notice a fairly large group of girls walk in. Most of them wear my merch.
Oh god no...
They split up and start to look around. Some of the other shoppers look at them, surprised. I would too, they're pretty loud.
"You look over there!"
"He should still be here!"
"Omg, I'm in the same store as amazingphil!"
I quickly put on my sunglasses, which I carry around for occasions like this, and pull up my hood. I shove the money into the machine and start to throw all of the food into plastic bags. I manage to fit them into two bags. I take a deep breathe and pray that they don't see me. I keep my head low as I start to walk out of the automatic doors. I am about to sigh in relief when I hear one of them say, "I think that's him!"
Without turning back, I start to speed walk to my car. Then, I realize that's a bad idea.
What if they see me get into my car? Then they'll know what it looks like! And what if they get my license plate number?! They can probably find my address with that! Then they'll know where I live! They'll stalk me and never leave me alone!
My head starts to fill with 'what if...' questions as I freak out. I decide to walk straight past my car and look for somewhere to hide. I make the mistake of looking behind me. There are at least ten teenage girls running after me. I turn around and start to run as fast as I can.
"It's Phil!"
"Amazingphil!"
"Phil!"
I take a sharp turn into and unknown building. Then I realize I walked into a mall. This is perfect. I start to speed walk into a random store. Its a Victoria's Secret store! As soon as I realize where I am, I turn around and run back out. My face burn bright red from all the women that gave me shocked stares. Now that I think about it, I look pretty sketchy, with my hood up and glasses on.
I run into the next store. Thankfully, there is no underware in this one. Its a Hot Topic. I run to the back of the store and hide behind some racks of t-shirts. I gasp for air. I put the bags on the floor and rest my hands on my knees as I try to breathe.
"Hello, welcome to Hot Topic. Do you need help find--hey I know you! You're amazingphil! Are you alright?" the person asks.
I look up to see a guy with bright red hair, probably around nineteen or twenty. His nametag says 'Kevin'. He gives me a worried look.
"Please, can...I hide...here?" I ask through deep breaths.
"I guess?" Kevin says it like a question. "Is something wrong?"
"There's a mob of girls who are chasing me," I say. I peek above the rack and see a few girls walk past the store.
Kevin rolls his eyes. "Fan girls," he shakes his head. "My little sister is just like them. She's obsessed with you."
They're everywhere...
"She's going to freak when I tell her who I met today. I have an idea," he says as he walks away. "You stay there."
I crouch further down. As I look around, I realize I am hiding behind a rack that holds my merch. I didn't even knew they sell that here!
"Hey! I know where amazingphil is!" Kevin shouts. My face goes pale.
He's going to tell them where I am. Oh god, no.
"Where?!" shrieks a girl.
"I saw him go up the escalators."
"Oh my gosh, he's on the second story!" she yells. I can hear a whole bunch of other shouting.
As I peek, I see all of them run up the escalators, pushing and shoving. Some of them even run up the escalators that go down!
Kevin comes back a few seconds later, a smile on his face. "The coast is clear," he says.
I finally sigh in relief. "Oh, thank you so much! Is there anything I can do to pay you back?"
"No, no, its fine," he says.
An idea pops into my head. I grab one of my merch shirts and sign it.
"What are you doing?" Kevin ask. "You still have to pay for that, you know."
"Here," I hand him the shirt,"this is for your sister." Then I take out my wallet. "And here's the money for the shirt. Keep the change." I hand him a fifty dollar bill. (Idk wtf im doing)
"Holy shit," he whispers. "Thank you!"
"No, thank you. You practicality saved my life," I say. I grab my bags and start to head out. "Bye!"
"Be careful!" he says with a laugh.
As soon as I am out of the door, I become tense once again. I constantly look around to make sure no one is following me. Then, I run the whole way back to my car.
I need to get out of here!
My hands shake as I try to quickly start the car. Once I do, I practicly speed out of the parking lot and race back home. The whole way there, I look out of the windows and through the mirrors to make sure no one is following me. I would have expected my breathing and heart rate to go back to normal, but it doesn't. My hands still haven't stopped shaking either. If anything, they start to go quicker.
As I am about to drive into my street, I make eye contact with a teenager. She stares directly into my soul until I drive past her.
Oh god, she knows who I am! They found me! They know where I live!
I park my car, grab the bags, and run to the door.
I need to be quick, before they see me!
I take my glasses off, struggling to get the key into the lock. My shaking hands don't make it easier. I end up pounding my fist on the door.
"D-Dan, let me in! Unlock the d-door!" I almost shout.
Where is he?! He's taking forever!
"Phil, what's going--oof!"
Once he finally opens the door, I shove shove him aside and slam the door shut. I lock it and lean against it.
They know where I am! They knew were I live! They probably hate me for running away from them!!
"Phil, are you alright?" Dan asks softly.
"They know," I barely say. My voice cracks at the end.
My throat is starting close. I can't breathe! Tears fall from my eyes as I start to panic. Is my heart trying to break through my ribcage with all that pounding? My whole body shakes and I feel weak. I slide to the floor, unable to hold myself up. My brain is filling with thoughts. It feels like it's going to explode!
They know! I'm going to have to move again! I have to get a new car too! They know! They. Know. They! Know! THEY KNOW! THEY KN...
"Hey, Phil? Listen to me," Dan snaps me back to reality.
He has both of his hands on either side of my face, gently forcing me too look at him. His cold skin feels nice against my hot cheeks. He has a calm expression and talks softly.
"You are safe," he says calmly. "No one can hurt you. No one knows anything. I am here. Breathe. Deep breath in though your nose." I try to do as he says. "And out through your mouth."
After a while, my shaking stops. My heart and breathing slows down and starts to go back to normal. Dan holds me until he is sure that I am completely calm.
He smiles once he sees I am better. I am about speak when the doorbell interrupts me. I gasp, anxiety flooding though me once again.
Oh god, no! They're here! The really do know!
I shuffle away from the door as fast as I can and hide around the corner. Dan gets up and checks who it is though the peephole.
"Its alright," he tells me. "Its only the mailman." I hear the letters fall though the little opening in the door and onto the floor. I jump when Dan appears in front of me.
"I'm sorry," he apologizes sheepishly.
He offers me a hand and I accept it. He helps me up. I expect him to let me go, but instead he pulls me into a hug. I inhale sharply out of surprise. He smells like vanilla.
"Are you alright now?" he asks as he rubs my lower back.
I rest my head on his chest (since he's way taller than me) and relax. I hug him back before answering, "Yes, thank you."
He puts he's chin on the top of my head and slowly starts to rock us from side to side. "Do you want to talk about what happened?" he asks softly.
My face burns from embarrassment as I think about how stupid I must have looked, freaking out over nothing.
"Its stupid," I whisper. I press my face deeper into his chest to hide it.
"I'm sure its not." He hugs me tighter.
"Well, I was at the grocery store when I saw some fans and we took picture or whatever, but as I was leaving, I was chased by a whole mob of them! I tried to get away, but they were right being me. I was afraid that they would find follow me here. I started to get paranoid and I freaked out," I say, my face turning a darker shade of red.
"That's a completely rational fear," Dan says. "I'm sure I'd feel the same way if I were as famous as you."
"I am not famous!" I say as I shove him playfully.
"Yeah, because I'm the one getting chased around by a mob of fan girls," Dan chuckles.
"Oh, shut up," I blush as I grab the grocery bags and take them to the kitchen. He laughs.
I start to take out the food and groan as I look at it. It's all ruined. Everything is smashed, and covered in some kind of yellow-ish slime.
What the...
The last thing I take out is a smashed box of eggs. It is dripping egg whites and yoke.
"Eww," says Dan as he appears into the room. He leans against the refrigerator. "I think you're suppose to to beat the eggs in a bowl, not in the box."
"Fuck you!" I say as I throw a slimy grape at him. It hits Dan right on the cheek.
"That's gross!" he yells in disgust. I laugh.
"Well, I guess I'm having pizza for dinner--again," I say.
******
I really do feel bad for all the poor famous people that are just trying to enjoy their day, but then are attacked by fans or paparazzi. It must really suck.
Anyway, tell me your thoughts about this chapter! Don't forget to comment and vote! Thanks for reading!!
-Ana 💖