Media: Dive - Ed Sheeran
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Coe's POV
His hands roamed my body like it was his to play with. I was, his. He knows my sweet spots, he knows my weaknesses. He plays them like a well trained professional. I respond, unable to even contemplate the idea of suppressing myself.
Another's lips were on mine, sucking the life out of me, yet resuscitating me at the same time. I latch on, afraid that if I didn't, I would come undone.
'Please.' I beg, always.
Against my lip, I felt his teeth nibbling. Hard enough to pull a gasp out of me, gentle enough for that pinch of pain to make me shake. I reach my hands out to touch him, only to meet resistance.
I forgot. I was restrained.
'Please.' I begged again.
They were always like that. They never listened to what I wanted. They always did as they pleased. I always protest, but their actions always pleased me in the end. I forget why I protest, why I even bother to. But I do, always, because it gave me a sense of power.
Please. The word 'please', I have never known it's power until them.
I gave my surrender again and again- people may think me weak. But it's only because they don't know. The power I hold in my pleas, in my tears. These weaknesses, are for them and only them. No one else will see me like this.
Unraveled. Ravished.
A sudden surge of pleasure slammed into my core, reaching my chest and tearing a moan out of me. Spots of blurry lights lined my darkened vision and I slammed my head into the mattress as I bucked. My entire being shook as the pleasure started building, every second more intense than the last.
I whispered my cries. But he didn't heed them. It only encouraged him, both of them.
Heath's thrusts slammed harder, firmer, faster. His grunts light up the heat from within me, and I arched my back to relieve the warmth gathering between my skin and the sheets.
A mistake.
I screamed, jerking hard against my restrains as a perfectly timed and impeccably executed thrust aimed true at my sweet spot because of my movements.
Tears dampened the handkerchief on my eyes, I felt them. The slight coolness against the edge of my cheekbones, right under my eyes. The odd coolness that I couldn't spare another thought about.
Jared's lips spread against mine as he detached from me. I groaned, begging him to come back.
"Let's see if we can make you cum with just your ass." His words made me shake harder, and Heath's grip on my hips tightened firmly, sending my ass towards his body, slamming hard into me like he was a man on a mission.
"Jer..." I whispered. A whisper was all I could muster. I was so worn out.
I had forgotten how many times I've orgasmed over the night. I was empty from the second or third time on. Empty and sensitive. But that didn't stop them.
They didn't need my seeds. Just my tears, my pleas, my screams, my cries, my shaking, my begging, my orgasm. They didn't need physical, tangible evidence that I had reached my peak again and again. They know it by heart. They know me by heart. They were satisfied only with the slow and sensual destruction of my being. They delighted in it.
They take and they take from me. Knowing that in this way, there won't be a deficit in me, they were only depositing their wealth instead.
I couldn't fight them. Not even if I weren't restrained.
I was theirs. I belonged to them to do as they pleased.
"Jer... Where are you...?" I asked, unable to see through the handkerchief tied around my eyes.
"Hmm?" He responded, a tint of cheer in his voice, "I'm right behind Heath... licking his ear."
Heath let out a groan as he slowed down in his thrusts, but his shaft seemed to hardened within me, intensifying the waves of pleasure and I breathed harder, sensing my orgasm nearing.
"... And playing with his nipples."
That did it. The muscles on my neck tightened in an instant. I screamed, clenching my fists as I shook terribly against the restrains, Heath buried deep inside of me, not moving except to empty himself inside of me.
This orgasm lasted longer than the previous.
I was shivering so hard that I could feel my teeth chattering.
As I felt my orgasm start to ebb from my core, I let out another strangled scream when I felt fingertips pinching my nipples suddenly.
They were relentless, not even with a bit of hesitation. They just did.
I thrashed where I laid, "Please! Stop!" I screamed, my body shaking violently as the orgasm I thought was about to fade came rushing back and Heath pulled out enough to slam back into me, hitting me at my spot hard.
I screamed, tugging hard at my restrains as I begged, "Stop. Stop. Stop. Please. Jer. Please. I can't. I can't take it anymore. Please!" A bit of spit came out with my words. I was desperate.
It was too good. I couldn't bear it.
But Jared paid me no mind. He twisted the tips of his fingers, sending sharp waves of pleasure up and down my spine.
I screamed until there was no breath left within me.
I laid where I was, surrendering to Jared's touch and Heath's ministrations.
Body jerking every so often, my mouth parted in a silent scream, mind in a mess, blank.
There was nothing left for me to do. Nothing that I could do.
All I knew in that moment, was pleasure.
I submitted to it. To them.
I forgot myself.
I forgot everything.
I just breathed, and let my body experience what it was coaxed into.
"Coe?"
I winced as I opened my eyes, the light from outside the full length windows hitting my cornea.
"You alright?" Heath asked as he brushed at my forehead gently.
"Hmm?" I moaned, blinking a few times before I realised that I was no longer restrained or blindfolded, but cleaned and tucked into what looked like a different set of sheets on the bed.
"You passed out." Heath chuckled, "Are you doing alright?"
I blushed, my heart racing as I stared at the hickeys littered all over Heath's body. I didn't make those. I couldn't. I wasn't allowed to service my lovers tonight. Jared made them.
I felt my body awaken, and despite my lust after Heath's body, I grimaced at the soreness erupting throughout my body.
Heath saw my face screwed up in pain and he hurried to sooth me.
"I'm fine." I whispered, clinging onto Heath, "Just thirsty." I lied.
"Here." Jared walked into the room in a pair of boxers holding a glass of water.
I smiled gratefully, accepting Heath's help as he sat me up on the bed. I tried to ignore the muscles protesting against every move I made as I held the glass of water in my hands. But before I could drink, my eyes couldn't help but wander about Jared's body.
"You like them? Heath made them." Jared smirked, running his hand over his body, "He's always been a good sucker." He declared proudly.
Heath rolled his eyes, "That I am, but of course, not as good as you are, boss."
I grinned, sipping at my water, quenching the thirst in my throat finally. I had been through a hell of a workout, and felt like I could drink my weight in fluids.
Jared dove into the bed, crawling up to me as he kissed my shoulder, "Are you hurt?"
I shook my head, "Just sore. As usual."
Jared's eyes followed my hands as I took another sip of water. He reached out to touch my wrists gently, and it was then that I noticed the bruising to my wrists, "Maybe we won't play with restrains for a while. Or maybe we shouldn't have used your pyjamas for it." He pulled one hand towards him, kissing the bruises on my wrist, "You're hurt."
I let out a laugh, "I hurt myself. I could've stayed still."
"We all know you couldn't have." Heath took the glass from me and placed it on the bedside table, "The whole idea was because we knew you could never stay still."
I blushed as he ran his hands over my naked thigh, "Boss is right, we shouldn't do restrains for a while. These will take a while to heal."
"They don't hurt that much." I protested.
"Listen to the man, Coe." Jared said as he pulled the sheets over him and slid into his place in our bed.
He pulled me towards him slightly and Heath helped to ease me into the bed.
I laid down between my lovers, contented for the moment.
But it wouldn't last long.
Now that my mind was clear, no longer occupied with pleasure, the fears and anxieties that have been plaguing me came rushing back.
I curled into myself.
I'm always like this.
Always.
Jared has always teased me about being like this after sex.
I was emotional.
But this time was different.
I didn't feel a surge of affections towards the two men in my bed like I always do. I didn't want to dive into their embrace and let the warmth of their bodies keep me save, or the sound of their breathing to lull me to sleep.
Tonight was different.
Tonight, all I felt was uncertainty.
Anxiety.
A sense of detachment.
Like I was there, but I wasn't. Like I wasn't supposed to be.
"Coe? I can hear you thinking." Heath kissed the side of my head, "What has your thoughts this time?"
I was quiet for a long while, until Jared moved to sit up and hover over me.
"Coe?"
Even the most obtuse of my two lovers could sense something was different this time.
I stared into his eyes.
He has changed. So much since I knew him.
The gaze that I used to covet after, was mine. But still, I felt lonely.
"Can we talk about this for a moment?" I started. There was no use hiding this from them. I needed to clarify matters before they get worse, before they eat me up from inside.
"What about?" Jared asked, his brows furrowed.
I pushed against his shoulder as I sat up, biting my lips hard from my muscles aching, "This? Us? The three of us? Your proposal? What it all means?" I let my words out. I don't want to hold back. We've come so far now. There was no need to conceal things between us, right?
"I thought it's pretty self-explanatory?" Jared frowned, his hands finding mine between the sheets. Heath's hand rested on my hip as he too sat upright.
"No, not really." I licked my lips nervously.
"Alright, ask away." Jared stared at me with sincerity in his eyes.
There was a time where he would have dismissed me, telling me I was overthinking things. But Jared has learnt in the time we were together, that it was better to take me seriously. Else I would just over think and poison my own mind.
I looked at Heath, wondering if he had never had questions like I did. Was he too used to doing everything that Jared demanded? I thought that was me? I was the one that was a mindless puppet when it came to Jared. Since when did Heath just go along with everything Jared does? Sure, he worked for the man, but he does speak up when Jared suggests something as out of the world as a "marriage" right??
"Okay, I cannot be the only one here that finds this situation between us kind of out of the regular right?" I asked, as delicately as I could.
"What situation?" Jared probed.
"The three of us, being together? And trying to make things official between us?" I swallowed nervously, "It is one thing for us to, you know, be together, physically and all. But being together, being married, that's- that's-"
Jared let out an incredulous breath, "We are official, Coe." His hands tightened around mine.
"I don't understand this." I shook my head.
"What do you not understand?" Jared's voice had a firm undertone. He was getting annoyed, at me. Because I was always so insecure. Questioning him, questioning us.
I pulled my hand out of his grip, "Some time ago, I was fucking Heath to forget you." I couldn't hold back. I needed to know, for sure. This time. The last time.
Jared grunted and narrowed his eyes at me, reaching out for me, but I moved away from his touch, only angering him further.
"How many times do I have to tell you to never do that? Never shy away from my touch, Coe. Damn it!" He growled as he made another attempt to touch me and I let him.
"Why the hell does this bother you and not what's important right now!?" I raised my voice.
Why couldn't he see? Everything was fine right now, why did he want to go and do something that could destroy everything between us? Who knew what a marriage could do to us?
"This is important." He yanked at my hand and pulled my closer. I let him, only because I can see the anger in his eyes, as though he was promising me hell if I didn't do as he said right now.
"What is so important about me trying to avoid getting trapped into your clutches? I'm trying to have a productive conversation without getting molested by you every single time!"
"I don't like it." Jared seethed through gritted teeth.
"What about it?!" I couldn't understand this man's logic for the life of me. I rolled my eyes and looked at Heath hoping he could understand my exasperation, but he was merely looking at us with a grin on his face, "Tell me what is it about it that is so damn important you don't even want to answer my-"
"It makes my chest hurt when you do it."
I sucked in a breath at Jared's confession.
"I don't like it." Jared repeated when I went silent.
"Your- Your chest hurts?" I tried to understand.
Jared nodded as though I just asked him if he drank coffee, "Yes, I have always told you that I don't like it. So stop it."
I blushed so heavily that I think all the blood in my body rushed to my head immediately. So all the times that I shied away from his touch and he told me to 'stop it', those times, he had already had feelings like these towards me? From the very beginning?
"Fine. I won't avoid your touches." I bit my lips to try to keep my focus on the questions I needed answered. I stared at Jared, determined, "But just, explain to me. Marriage? And even though you say you would adopt Heath, that's only because we can't register him into the same marriage, right? You still mean to marry him?"
Jared frowned for several moments, and I literally counted the time that passed with the beats of my heart.
"What's wrong with marriage? Everyone does it. It's no big deal."
I couldn't help the pang of hurt in my chest and the automatic frown as his words hit me. I looked away from Jared, at Heath instead, "Do you love Heath?" I asked quietly, "Does Heath love you? Does Heath love me?" I clung onto Jared's hand tightly, "Can we love each other? Is this even normal? A relationship between three men? What are we doing?" I stared at his fingers, unable to look at him.
Jared jerked my arm towards him and pulled me so close to him that I stopped thinking for a few seconds, before I let a tear fall from my face, "Tell me something I can believe, then I won't ask ever again." I choked out, "But if love is not involved here, I don't want to marry you. If we're only getting married to make a point to those people out to get me, to get us, I don't want it. We are fine the way we are right now, Jer."
"Why would I ask you to marry me if I don't love you?" Jared looked at me so sincerely and spoke so gently that I stopped breathing. It was the first time I've ever seen him so vulnerable. His fingers touched my face and he reached out to hold Heath's hand with his other hand, "I know that I've made many mistakes. I've said it before, and I thought you understood when I said that I love you. Where is this doubt coming from?"
I froze and went quiet.
Yes, I remember that very vividly. That time when Jared told me he loved me. But that doesn't mean marriage, right?
Heath's arm went around my waist and we were tangled up in a mess before I knew it.
Jared leaned in to kiss me chastely on my lips, "Listen, I'm sorry I ever hurt you." My heart stopped beating for a second.
"I will do everything in my power, until I take my last breath, to never hurt you again. And you know how much power I have, and how much will I have. You know that you're permanent for me. So yes, I love you. If you ever doubt me again, I will show you exactly how much I love you. But don't expect me to say this again. I love you, Coe and I want to marry you." He turned to Heath without waiting for me to say a word, "I love Heath too, in a different sort of way, but I cherish him and I care for him, and I would give my life for him, so I hope that's enough for you."
I sobbed, wiping the tears from my eyes.
Heath's grip on my waist tightened and he kissed the side of my head, "And I love you too, Coe. From the moment I got to know you, and had to watch out for you from afar, I already fell for you. How could I not? You were so obvious with your love for Jared, and in the years that I've known you, you were the purest person I know. You give your heart out completely to people you love. That's attractive as hell, and it doesn't hurt that you look the way you are." He laughed when I made a face at his words. He turned to Jared, "And Jared Jackson, I was supposed to be your right hand man, to take care of you and any needs you have. I think it's safe to say that it's going to be up to me to take care of your heart from now on. I do love you. Even if it's weird as hell to say it out loud."
The both of them turned to look at me, and Jared raised a brow, "So the question is, Coe Parker, do you love us? Would you have us? Can we have you?"
I threw myself at the both of them, holding them close to me.
"You can have all of me!" I shrieked as I let out another wretched sob, "I do love you both. I want this. I want you."
We sat together like that, the both of them placating me as I cried until I was satisfied. I had never felt more whole than at that moment.
"You good?" Heath asked, kissing my head for the umpteenth time.
I nodded finally, my cries already subsided.
"Good. I cannot do this ever again. I think my manhood shrunk." Jared groaned.
"Mmm, we'll have to check that out properly." Heath commented, squeezing my ass hard as he winked at Jared.
"I think now is a good time to check." Jared smirked as he started to unbutton his shirt.
"Guys, I am sore. Beyond sore from everything we did just now." My eyes widened in disbelief.
Jared and Heath shared a look, before they leaned in to kiss each other right in front of my eyes.
Oh God, what have I gotten myself into?
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Just a few more chapters to go before we are done here~
I hope you guys loved it!