You nearly screamed seeing Jungkook's motionless body lying on the ground. Taehyung was kneeling next to him, holding onto his head in agony.
"JUNGKOOK GET UP!", he yelled and cried at the same time.
Never having seen him this way, you couldn't help but feel afraid.
You felt something like a clump blocking your throat, not letting you speak a word. It was your fault for not stopping Jimin...
"JUNGKOOK!! Y/N HELP ME!", Taehyung welped, grabbing onto your foot while shaking Jungkook's body with his other hand.
The boy's clothes were a little torn from the explosion, also causing his one arm to have burn marks left.
It felt as if your heart was falling apart just looking at the scene.
"Y/N,...please", Taehyung squealed before looking you in the face.
His eyes were red, tears rushing down like rivers as his nose ran as well.
He had a slight burn injury on his hand but didn't seem to mind the pain it must have been causing him.
You didn't know what to do and just stood there, staring at the corpse on the ground in disbelief. Your brain couldn't really process the information that a friend, a family member was lying there, possibly dead.
Taehyung just broke down, resting his head on the chest of his younger friend whom he had cherished so much. He took Jungkook's head into his hands, while pressing his own cheek against the forehead of the boy.
It reminded you of how he had always pressed their foreheads against each other as a sign of affection, seeming like little puppies.
They had really been like brothers.
The smoke had already cleared by then, revealing Jimin still standing at his primary position. You really felt as if you could kill him again, but you had no energy anymore.
So much had happened and you had already shed so many tears, that you felt as if they had dried out.
However, Taehyung seemed to have a mental breakdown. Placing Jungkook's head back on the ground as gently as possible, he got up again.
Seeming as if he was drunk, he swayed a little at first before running off towards Jimin in such a speed, that you could barely follow.
He threw a punch towards Jimin, which the other man avoided effortlessly. Taehyung's moves were slow and sloppy, purely caused by anger and devastation.
Jimin didn't fight back, but just kept avoiding.
"You bastard!", Taehyung yelled.
"You killed him!"
Then, he finally landed a punch.
Jimin fell backwards, Taehyung landing onto him. In his rage, he started beating Jimin mercilessly.
All of his hesitation from before was gone.
He was truly out to kill him with his bare hands.
You took a look at Jungkook's pale face, which thankfully, hadn't gotten injured as much.
"I'm so sorry Kookie", you mumbled to him before running off to stop the two.
You grabbed onto Taehyung's back, trying to pull him off of Jimin, but you didn't manage. He was like a cat clawing onto it's toy, not letting you tear it away.
You noticed that his rage was too great to even listen to your pleading and it reminded you of yourself when you had wanted to kill Jimin. You understood him. After all, you felt just as devastated as he was.
But for some reason, you couldn't cry anymore. It felt as if you had grown colder and had gotten used to coping with people dying.
It hurt seeing Jungkook like that, but you felt as if you didn't have the time to be sad about it. You had to stop Jimin first.
"YOU BASTARD!!", Taehyung yelled at the top of his lungs, causing his voice to become all raspy and eventually crack. He kept on gulping down tears as he yelled on.
"PARK JIMIN I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!"
You could feel yourself being mentally torn apart. There was no chance to bring Jimin back to the team.
It just wasn't an option anymore. Not after this.
Taehyung was trying to struggle himself out of your grip, but you didn't let him go. He was stronger than you, but you supposed that he was emotionally too weak to break free.
Jimin got up silently, brushing off the blood from his face while his right hand still bled. You wondered why he hadn't fought back when Taehyung had beaten him up. The silver-haired man avoided your gaze and looked to the ground.
"You can let him go Y/N", Jimin just muttered.
You didn't listen to him. He would have been beaten into a pulp by Taehyung if you let him go. Honestly, you thought it would have been a fair thing to do, but held him back anyways. Now wasn't the time.
Instead, you twirled around and threw Taehyung onto the ground with all your might.
He seemed to have snapped out of it as his empty gaze fixated you standing in front of him.
"Tae please...stop", you pleaded, slowly feelings tears welling up as you reverted your gaze to the two Bangtan members.
One last tear rushed down Taehyung's cheek before facing Jungkook's body lying there.
"He saved me", he just whispered, before helplessly crawling to his dongsaeng's body.
"What an idiot", he whined as he petted the younger boy's hair.
You had never seen Taehyung act like this. It made you frustrated that he was in such a state, so helpless and feeling so left alone. Obviously he felt guilty for being saved by his friend - even though you should have been the one to blame.
And so you did. It was obvious that it was your fault for not stopping Jimin.
That was your responsibility now, not Taehyung's.
You turned to see Jimin, still standing at the entrance of the mansion, leaning against the doorframe with his head. He seemed awfully quiet all of a sudden, still looking bruised from Taehyung's punches.
But what was that look on his face?
He didn't immediately face you, but he knew you were approaching.
As soon as you had reached him, your hand felt the urge to move on its own and slap him, possibly even harder than Taehyung had punched.
He was caught aback and nearly stumbled backwards.
Then finally, you felt a warm drop roll down your cheek as your eyes met.
"I... I hate you."
Shocked over your own words, you nearly covered your mouth. You felt as if your body was being controlled. But was that really a lie?
You couldn't tell whether you hated him or loved him...or maybe both? At the moment, you felt like you regretted ever coming back to him. You regretted admitting to your feelings for him.
Jimin couldn't change.
His lip twitched, before wiping the red liquid rushing down his nose.
"I know", he just replied, making you feel even worse.
"I hate myself too."
You heard Taehyung painfully crying several meters behind you, sending shivers down your back. Jimin had actually done it... he killed one of your family.
"So... don't you want to kill Taehyung now?", you shouted at him, provoking him.
"Are you going to throw another bomb, or shoot him yourself? Are you going to enjoy blowing his head off, is that it??!"
He just gave you a cold look before replying: "I'll let him go for now, bring the body home. He'll come back sooner or later."
Your mouth fell open. This wasn't what he had said before. It was obvious that Taehyung had always been his main target -for whatever reason- but suddenly he just wanted to let him go?? It didn't make sense.
"Wha-", you gasped through your tears.
"I still need to kill the rest", he muttered. "Even if Jungkook got in the way..."
He seemed different all of a sudden, as his eyes had a glint of sadness in them. Was he regretting something?
All your feelings and all the thoughts you had wasted on him just came back at you like a punch in the face.
You couldn't believe that all your effort was worth nothing, that he just wanted to continue killing Bangtan.
Without another word, you turned around and left him behind you.
"Taehyung, come on", you told him and grabbed his arm to stand up.
"Let's carry him together."
He needed a moment to process what you had just said, but then followed your instructions.
Jimin on the other hand, didn't like it at all that you were leaving.
"Wait, where are you going?!"
He was pissed again, which wasn't a good sign.
"I'm going back to Bangtan. I can't sit here while you kill my friends, not anymore."
Your voice was firm and certain. As much as it hurt, you knew there was no possibility of changing Jimin's mind.
Jungkook was innocent. He had nothing to do with Jimin's death. He had always loved and cherished his hyung.
And yet, here he was, dead because of something that didn't even have to do with him.
"You can't leave!", Jimin shouted at you while grabbing your arm roughly.
Taehyung wanted to go at him again, but you pushed him away just in time.
"I thought I could change you back again, but I just saw that it's not possible. There is no point in me staying here if you are a coldhearted killer and psychopath."
"I'm- I'm not! I can prove it to you, please stay", Jimin pleaded.
He brushed trough his hair in nervousness, seeming to break down mentally and physically. But you couldn't afford to have pity anymore.
"I don't trust you anymore", you admitted sadly.
Jimin's expression turned blank as you turned away from him and picked up Jungkook with the help of Taehyung.
It hurt so damn much saying all those things to Jimin. But at least it helped.
He let you and Taehyung walk away with Jungkook in your arms, seeming so peaceful as if he was asleep.
With tears still rushing down your face, partially because of Jungkook, also because of Jimin, you let Taehyung silently lead the way to the car.
The only thing you heard was the cracking of branches beneath your feet as you walked through the woods.
The pain in your chest was something you would be feeling for the next while.
---
You were driving the car.
Taehyung was in the back, holding Jungkook's body as if his life depended on it.
He had fallen asleep on the way, letting you feel your own drowsiness kick in. You hadn't slept all night yourself because of all the events.
The choice of going back with Taehyung was definitely the right one, but something still made you feel uneasy.
Maybe it was the way Jimin acted after Jungkook ended up dead because of him.
"I hate myself too."
Did Jimin feel at least a little guilt or remorse?
You brushed off the thoughts of him for now. Thinking of him would increase the hole left in your heart now that you were apart again. But it was for the best.
You had literally almost gone too with him if Taehyung and Jungkook hadn't attacked the place. You were so stupid for letting yourself go like that.
But then again, you thought that Bangtan was all dead at the time.
The memory of Jimin's lips on yours made your heart ache even more, so you shook your head for a second to gather yourself. He killed Jungkook
You would have turned on the music in times like these, but the situation wasn't approppriate now.
Taehyung hadn't spoken a word after carrying Jungkook to the car. You didn't know if he was angry at you as well for not doing something about Jimin, but you would have understood if he thought so.
The sun was slowly rising again, a sight you hadn't seen in a while. It was so beautiful, yet so short.
Once the sun was up, it would stay there all day but not look as beautiful as when it rised or set again.
Then, when it was about to disappear, it had this dazzling beauty again, only for a short moment.
Not knowing why your thoughts had gotten there, you snapped out of it and realized that you were near the address Taehyung had given you.
Apparently, it was the location of the new dorm.
---
Not really knowing how to enter the place and how to explain what had happened to the others, you and Taehyung stood there cluelessly.
No one wanted to open the door, not to mention talk to the others.
"Maybe we should tell Namjoon first", you suggested as he was the most reasonable one - as well as the leader.
Taehyung shook his head.
"I got us into this, I'll take the responsibility."
His voice was monotone and cold. He sounded like another person...
You smiled weakly, trying to encourage him a little bit before entering the new dorm. Seeing the tired and devastated face of your best friend hurt you so damn much. It was your fault.
There was too much on your mind to pay attention to the place and what it looked like.
The first people you saw were Jin and Namjoon in the kitchen, awake first as always.
They both rose from their chairs in shock seeing you back. You wanted to greet them after months, but now wasn't the time.
They probably didn't know whether to be happy to see you or not. But seeing your depressed faces, they already realized something was wrong.
"Y/N? Taehyung? What's going on? Where have you been?", Jin asked worriedly, noticing Taehyung's wounds and bloody hands.
But before anything else could be said, Taehyung broke down again. His feet seemed to have just given up, his composure as well. Although he had tried to tell them in a calm way, he couldn't bring it out without crying like crazy.
The other two listened to him carefully, their faces turning paler as the story progressed.
Not saying much, Namjoon left the room, while Jin just sat there with a hand over his mouth.
It was so hard living through the story again, thinking of how cruel Jimin was. You felt so sorry for not realizing there was no point in staying with him earlier.
Taehyung was just not himself anymore and you doubted he could ever be again.
It reminded you of yourself when you had lost Jimin 2 years ago. You basically went through a whole personality change as well due to the suffering you had lived through.
From one day to another, everything was going to change. You couldn't bare the thought of Taehyung never being cheerful again - it just wasn't right.
Also you and Jimin, it was clear that it would be hard seeing him again.
After what he had done, you were sure that Bangtan didn't want him back anymore. You were definitely enemies now.
Deep in your heart, you knew that Jimin was just crazy and wrong. But you yourself felt even crazier for still loving him.
No matter what he did, no matter how much you hated him, there was no time you had ever lost your feelings for him.
Even if all of Bangtan lay there dead on the ground, you'd still be willing to fight for Jimin, even if it was impossible to get him back to his old self anymore.
You loved him like an idiot, but that was just how stubborn you were.
××××
A/N: I know I hate myself for this too
But hey, don't jump to conclusions
Keep reading and something might just brighten your mood in about 2 chapters:)
Thank you for the support!
[Yoonginyaan]-Author💜