This chapter is dedicated to anyone
who suffered from psychological
trauma or depression in the past
or still suffering.
I am here for you, stay strong ♥
Enjoy. (Y)
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Natalie's P.O.V
I finally said yes to Enrique, more because he was consistently pestering me about it and less because I wanted to. I still have doubts, like what kind of person he actually is. But he's the only child of people, I adore very much. I still remember how aunt Caroline and uncle Montario came to Brazil after Irina's death to give me moral support.
Adrian said I need to get things out of my chest so that I feel light-hearted. He forced me to go to a psychiatrist and I did. But it was of no help, all I did was cry like a kid. It got so worse that I fainted in doctor's office. After that no one talked to me about going there ever again.
I was a simple 18 year old girl who had never even been to a burial ceremony let alone witnessing something as cruel as death of someone close to my heart.
You can't get out of depression without strong will and back then I had nothing left to deal with something like that.
No matter how much I tried, I still was on the same spot where I started from. Ashley once even fighted me because of this. She said that Irina was just a friend why am I still lingering in the past, I should move on.
Everyone tells me to move on but no-one tells me how to do that. I never thought that someday, I'll become this sensitive. I also want a normal life with friends, family and someone special. But I am afraid!
Afraid to trust
Afraid to love.
Afraid to get hurt again.
I don't want to trust or love someone like I did for Irina. I'll never forgive her, I'll never forgive Xavier.
No one really knows, what it did to me. I have trust issues, I can't make my relationships work because of that. After Irina's death Enrique is the first person I am going to be friends with. I never made any new one's. I don't want to get attached and then blame someone after getting hurt.
It hurts so much, I still have nightmares. Her death anniversary is coming soon and I don't know how much I'll suffer this time....
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"Do you have to go?" I asked Jason one last time after exiting the main gate. He was going back to London today.
"I have to sister. I already missed classes of one week." Jason said while putting his stuff into car's trunk.
"That's not fair. You came after six months and only for two weeks." I whined while crossing my arms in frustration.
"Baby doll, I am coming permanently, I'll latch on to you like a snail. Just six more months." He caressed my cheeks with one hand while placing other on my head.
"Stay for at least one more week huh?" I spoke desperately, my eyes on the ground.
"Do you really want me to stay because you'll miss me or is it something else?" He got all serious and I knew if I ever told him what was going on in my mind. He'll stay without giving a damn about his degree. I can't be that selfish.
"It's nothing, I'll just miss you a lot. It's okay. You have to go." I said quickly while looking into his eyes to make him believe.
"It doesn't look like it's nothing. I am not going." He said in a final tone. Shit Natalie you're an idiot!
"Hahah you look cute pouting like that and you have to go now. Your girly attitude is making me sick." I tried the best I could to make my smile look genuine.
"Yes. That's my Natalie." Jason said while pulling me into a hug. I smiled at that and hugged him back.
"We love you okay? Me, mom and dad. We're family and we all are here for you. If you need me then just give me a call. I'll be here." He was ruffling my hair lightly and spoke in all seriousness.
"Hmmm I know. I love you too. Let's go now. You're getting late." I told him then started stepping towards the car. He was the best brother one could ever have. First Adrian and now him.
Aaaaahh!!!
I am so going to miss him...
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Enrique's P.O.V
Next day after her YES, I was so excited to meet her today. I wanted to tell her so many things but she didn't come. I kept waiting for her but she didn't appear. Why didn't she come? Have I missed it? Could it be that she came early today? I searched her in her class, at her usual spot, back side of the building but she was nowhere.
I had a class too but fuck the damn lecture!
I drove my car to her home. I was at the door and was about to press the doorbell but stopped.
She won't like it! But that's her fault. Why didn't she inform me first? She should've texted me.
Oh right. She don't have my number! Damn it. I have to wait whole day to see her. Please just don't get sick angel...
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Next day I saw her finally. Thank God she came, otherwise I was planing to go to her house without giving a damn about consequences.
She was alone and was adjusting some papers in her assignment file. She didn't even look up so I blocked her way and asked in an angry tone.
"Why didn't you come yesterday?"
"Huh?" She looked up with her innocent light brown eyes then after seeing me, scrunched up her eyebrows in confusion. So cute!
But I had waited whole day for her yesterday. So I won't let her cuteness get in my way.
"Do I have to repeat every time? Why didn't you come yesterday?" I again asked still in angry tone.
After giving me a sharp look because of my angry tone, she spoke in a low voice.
"Hmm!! My brother was going back to London so I had to accompany him to the airport."
She was looking so cute yet sad probably because of her brother. Aaah!! Why is she sad? Where is my feisty Natalie?
"Your cell phone, take it out."
I spoke gently this time not to startle her. She looked at me suspiciously but seeing me all serious, she took out her cell phone from her shoulder bag.
"Unlock it." I spoke again. She again looked at me with uncertainty but unlocked it anyway.
"Now give it to me." I said finally.
She looked at me like I have grown two heads. Then shook her head no multiple times and spoke in loud voice.
"What? Why? What do you want from a girl's cell phone? I am not giving it. No way."
I could understand her situation. Cell phone is a personal possession but she won't give me her number that easily if I ask straight. Would she?
"Natalie, I won't run away and even if I did just go straight to my parents and ask for it. Now give it to me." I tried my best to convince her in a soft tone and stretched out my right hand.
She looked at me, still with uncertainty while narrowing her eyes. I almost laughed at that. But I had to maintain my serious posture. After thirty seconds of contemplating, she gave it to me, her eyes glued on my fingers. My baby!
I dialled my number then after I heared it ringing, I ended the call. Saved my number as 'Love' then gave it back to her after deleting my number from call log.
I was grinning ear to ear. I have her number. Yayyy! Score!
"There you go. Now I can irritate you all day long. Have a nice day." I spoke playfully, gave her a huge smile then started walking towards class quickly.
"What? Wait. Listen---" She kept calling me. But I didn't stop, feeling proud like I've discovered a gold mine.
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After she was back to her home, more like when I saw her getting into her house. I called her. Her phone was ringing and I knew she never checked her cell phone thoroughly since she had back to back classes today.
She'll choke on air after looking at the caller id, I thought and smirked at her possible reaction.
She picked up and I heard her yelling.
"Who the hell?"
"Enrique." I whispered my name in return of which she screamed on top of her lungs.
"I'll kill you. Why would you save it as love? Where are you? I'll come personally to kill you with my bare hands, you jerk."
What a cute threat. I was laughing continuously at her angry reaction.
"Hahaha relax relax! It was supposed to be a joke ( Hell no! I am dead serious ). But do you really want to see me? Aww someone is missing me already." I teased her while placing my head on the driver seat.
"Missing? Missing my a--- Shut up." She almost cussed me out but stopped and ended the call instead. Hahaha!
Shut up Enrique, shut up! I was laughing hysterically remembering her words.
I knew I was totally getting on her nerves but that was making me way too happy to stop.
You're soon going to die, she'll kill you with her bare hands. I smiled...
You have already killed me
Miss Natalie Williams!!!
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Weather is nice here so I wrote finally. Bonus chapter :D
Good night.
Peace lover :)