if you're reading this, i'm most likely dead already. i never really excepted my life to end up like this, but i just wanted to let it all out there.
my whole life i've always lived in the shadows, no one really cared about me. i didn't have a lot of friends in my life, only two that ended up moving on anyway.
during senior prom one, that stupid fucking drunken night, i ended up having a one night stand with some girl whose name i didn't know. and now i know her as my baby mama.
she was one of the popular chicks who thought i was hot after three shots of tequila. little did she know we both became parents that night, and frankly, i didn't mind all that much.
priscilla elizabeth wentz was born on july 9th, 2011. and as i'm writing this she would still be 6 years old. and the day i laid eyes on her, the moment i cradled her in my arms, i knew that i still had meaning in my life.
ashlee and i tried the whole co-parent thing for a while, and it was working for a bit. but the love never came back. but to be fair, you can bring something back if it never existed.
but i felt real love with priscilla, and would give anything if it means i got to see her again, even it it was jusy for a second. she stopped me from overdosing on pain medicine the night i found i was having a baby girl.
thank you for that, honey.
i hope to see your precious face again, and this time i promise i won't be selfish. daddy wants to be there for you and all that you do. i wanna take you to school. i want to buy you that new car you're gonna beg me for. i wanna walk you down the isle on your wedding day. i wanna see you again.
even if you never hear from me, i want you to know that your daddy was a monster, and maybe he didn't deserve a precious angel like you. i wish you nothing but happiness in your life, especially with me gone.
i love you more than life itself, and i hope one day you can love me too. goodbye, prissy.
love, petey.