Brett
I either felt everything too damn much or nothing at all. There's no middle. It's one or the other. No grey area, just black and white. But with Becca ... With Becca I felt everything. Every touch, every kiss, every look, every whisper. I felt it all.
I felt her presence within me so vibrantly that I knew its mark was permanent. She laced herself into the depths of my heart, my soul, and there was no escaping now. We couldn't go back, only forward. And I wanted to go forward with her until there was no where left to go.
I wanted everything with this girl.
Call me crazy. Hell, maybe I am. Crazy in love? Crazy in like? Crazy about her? A little of each or all at once? I had no damn clue.
All I knew was that being with Becca made me feel like I was on top of the fucking world. Every time I made her smile or laugh; every time she leans up on her tip toes and hooks her arms around my neck; every time she allows herself to be vulnerable with me; every time she lets me kiss her...it feels as if my heart expands in my chest, threatening to burst out at any moment.
She made me feel a happiness that I never even knew existed. And this was only our first day as a real couple.
Man, I was losing it.
* * *
I leaned in and kissed Becca's cheek as we walked through the school hallway. Her face immediately flushed pink and the look in her eyes made us feel very alone in this crowded space.
"Brett!" She yelled my name and lightly smacked my arm. I loved how she was embarrassed by this. I started laughing which, of course, only made her more annoyed.
She was still shy to my affection and that was fine, eventually she would open herself up to me completely. But I couldn't help it, I kissed her every chance I had, held her hand or wrapped my arm around her, just to feel her pressed up against me. Just to know that she was still there. Becca was my girlfriend now and everyone in this damn school needed to know that.
I wanted to flaunt my girl to the entire world. Was that such a bad thing?
Every student in the hall had their eyes trained on us as we walked hand in hand. I knew Becca wasn't a fan of all the attention -- I could tell by the way she kept looking over her shoulders, her eyes scanning the halls nonstop; or by how she was fidgeting with her bag strap, a nervous habit. I reached out and slid the strap off her shoulder and down her arm before carrying it on mine. She glanced up at me and smiled shyly. I wanted to reach out and pull her to me, to feel her completely in my arms.
This girl would be the death of me.
"Everyone's staring at us, Brett." She groaned. Her head was tilted downwards as she turned the dial on her locker, her hair cascading down and blocking her face from my view. I reached out and tucked it behind her ear.
"Let them stare," I shrugged.
"It's not that easy!" She sighed, frustrated as she slammed the books into her locker. When she looked up at me there was a fire behind her eyes, the same one I saw that very first day in the hallway. She was good at hiding it but some times the fire blazed brighter and for some sick reason, I loved it.
She crossed her arms tightly and stared up at me, chewing nervously on her very kissable bottom lip. Her mouth was moving animatedly and I couldn't focus on what she was saying. Her lips were mesmerizing.
I thought back to this morning when she hooked her legs around my waist and pulled me to her, kissing me like she never had before. Just the thought of it made me --
"Brett!" She yelled. I blinked out of my haze and slowly removed my gaze from her mouth, staring into her eyes, greeted by the blazing flame. "Stop staring at my lips and listen to me!"
I chuckled at her comment. She seriously had no idea what she did to me.
"I'm sorry, babe. What is it?" Her face softened at my words, I knew how much she loved it when I called her babe.
She placed her hand in mine softly before she spoke. "I don't like this. All the attention," she gestured around us to the students watching. "It feels like we're always under a spotlight, Brett." The sadness in her voice made me pull her to me, holding her tightly against my chest.
Unlike Becca, I didn't care about the staring. Every time I was with her, I wasn't aware of anyone else. It was like she was all I could see, everything else was just background noise.
"It's high school, Becca. People are always looking for something to talk about. Just ignore them, alright? It's just the two of us. No one else." I said into her hair, feeling her arms wrap gently around my back as I sighed happily. A moment later, I pulled back slowly so that her face was inches from mine. "Me and you," I told her and she smiled at my words.
My eyes instantly locked on her lips as they stretched upwards.
"Would you kill me if I kissed you right now?" I asked, already knowing the answer.
She rolled her eyes and laughed dryly. "Yes," she answered, confirming my thoughts.
I paused for a moment to think about her response. "It'll be worth it," I told her before closing the distance between us and pressing my lips to hers. Her defiance disappeared quickly as she kissed me back, melting into my hands as she always did.
Every time we kissed, she did this thing where she leaned in slowly, apprehensively, and pressed her chest against mine. It made me want her in ways I had never wanted a girl before. I had done this before but Becca made everything feel like the first time all over again.
I wanted to deepen the kiss, to roam my hands over her body and through her hair, but we were in school and I knew she would kick my ass if I tried that. She gently placed her hands on my chest like she always did when she wanted me to stop, and I obeyed.
Reluctantly, I pulled my face away from hers. Her eyes were still closed, a smile tugging at the corners of her full lips. Slowly, she opened her eyes and gazed up at me and the look in them nearly killed me. I knew she wanted me the same way I wanted her, her eyes told me everything.
I had to calm myself the hell down before I did something stupid.
"Brett?" She said softly.
I swallowed hard and nodded, unable to speak through the lump in my throat.
"You were right this morning," she whispered, pressing her forehead against mine. "Maybe we should have stayed in...spent the day at the hotel."
Oh my God. Did she just...?
She chewed on her lip invitingly and I nearly fell to my knees right there.
I stared at her, my mouth opened wide as I struggled to understand what she just said. Was she being fucking serious? I would pick her up in my arms and take her back to the hotel in a minute if she was.
Suddenly, she laughed. Not the small, shy giggle she usually gave me, but a loud, booming laugh. She threw her head back enthusiastically as her shoulders shook.
"Oh my gosh, you should have seen the look on your face!" She exclaimed, wiping the tears from under her eyes. "Brett, I'm joking." She said proudly, smiling widely up at me.
I shook my head, my heart still racing from her "joke". Didn't she know not to tease a guy like that? Especially when I already thought about that a hundred times every damn day.
"You wanna play like that, Hartwell?" I teased, leaning in and whispering in her ear. "Game on, baby." I gently kissed the spot under her ear and she shuddered.
She cleared her throat suddenly and I pulled away from her, turning around to face whoever caught Becca's attention. Jenny was standing behind me, watching us with a look of malice on her face. I rolled my eyes and turned around back to Becca, blocking Jen from her view.
Her entire demeanour had shifted. The fire in her eyes was gone, she looked afraid as she gazed down at the floor, her arms hanging limp at her side. In that moment, I hated Jenny - hated her for having this effect on Becca.
I picked up her book bag and shut her locker. "Come on," I told her, sliding my hand across Becca's waist and guiding her to English class. She didn't say a word the entire walk there, just kept her eyes trained in front of her as she gripped my hand in hers.
I didn't want to go to class. I didn't want to be around all these damn people and their unwanted gaze. I just wanted to be back in my room, alone with Becca and wrapped up blissfully in my bed.
I couldn't remember the last time I actually got to sit with her in English class. This past week without her had been so rough that I nearly forgot what it was like to have her beside me. We settled into our usual spots in the last row, a personal favourite so I could admire her the entire time without anyone else seeing. Maybe that's why I was failing before...
Class hadn't begun yet. Students slowly trickled in and took their seats, each one gazing at Becca and I for a brief moment. Her eyes were staring down into her desk and she had a death grip on my hand, her shoulders tense as she tried to block out the world around her. Jenny's presence had effected her. I wish she would tell me what she was thinking.
But I knew Becca by now and how her mind worked. If she wanted to tell me something, she would. If she wanted to get something off her chest, she would. I wasn't going to push her, she would open up when she was ready to.
I removed my eyes from her face and took in the students around me. All of them had their eyes trained on their phones, whispering to one another. Becca looked up and noticed as well, tilting her head sideways to glance at me with her eyebrows raised. I shook my head and shrugged, having no idea what everyone was so preoccupied with and not really giving a fuck.
A hush fell over the class as Jenny walked in, smiling like she had a secret she wanted to share. I rolled my eyes and looked back at Becca. No one else mattered but her. She was watching Jenny carefully, her eyes following her every move.
I scooted my chair closer to hers and wrapped my arm around her shoulder, wanting to comfort her from whatever was going on in her mind. By the look on Becca's face, I knew she was lost in her own thoughts.
A shadow fell over us and I reluctantly removed my gaze from Becca and glanced up, meeting Jenny's glare. Becca pressed her body into mine and I held her a little tighter.
"I didn't know you two were back together!" Jenny exclaimed. I rolled my eyes at her voice, how did people buy into her fake bullshit?
"Didn't know you were keeping track," I replied simply, straining my neck to look around Jenny's body and catch a glimpse of the clock on the wall. Class was starting in five minutes and every second felt like an eternity. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was waiting for something bad to happen.
Becca yawned beside me. Jenny laughed. The students in class turned around to stare at us eagerly. I wanted to pick Becca up and get the hell out of here. Now.
"No wonder you're tired, Becca. Juggling two guys is a lot of work. Right?" My head wiped back to Jenny at her words. Juggling two guys? What the fuck was she talking about? Her hand flew to her chest as Becca's body went rigid beside me.
"Oh Brett, you didn't know? Let me show you," she pulled her phone out of her bag and began to tap away. I looked at Becca and her eyes were open wide in horror. I had let Jenny's lies come between us one too many times, I wouldn't let that happen again.
"I don't give a damn, Jen. Sit down and leave us the hell alone." Her mouth hung open at my words. She quickly regained her composure and held her phone out to me.
"Look, Brett. You need to see this." Every word that came out of her mouth sent me over the edge. If it wasn't for Becca's hand gripping mine, I would have lost my shit by now. I forced myself to breathe.
"I said that I don't care. I've had enough of you trying to ruin our relationship. Whatever's on your phone is another lie for you to wedge between us and I'm not buying into your crap anymore."
The entire room was silent. No one moved a muscle. Students watched us with their mouths hanging open in awe. Jenny looked like she was about to cry, but none of that mattered. I looked at Becca and she was smiling at me, her entire face beaming and so fucking beautiful that I knew I made the right choice.
She squeezed my hand in hers and time began to move again. Just me and her. That's all that mattered.
Jenny's eyes narrowed into slits as they remained fixed on the only girl that mattered: Becca. I was vaguely aware of her walking off but I didn't care enough to look, I couldn't peel my eyes off of Becca.
Dammit, I wished we were alone.
"Brett," she breathed, her wide eyes wandering between mine. "That was ..." Her voice trailed off, unable to find the words to express what she was feeling.
I held her face in my hands and kissed her gently, knowing damn well every student in this class was watching. Good, let them watch. Let them know that this girl's heart was mine, and mine hers.
"Too harsh?" I asked her honestly, wondering if what I said frightened her at all. She laughed, her face breaking out into a smile.
"Perfect amount of harshness," she joked, giggling quietly again. Her face softened for a moment and she looked at me seriously, grabbing my hands in hers. "Thank you," she said quietly after a minute, her eyes never leaving mine.
"For what?"
"For not believing Jenny. For choosing me," she whispered so quietly and unsure that my heart flipped.
I had never been so aware of my heart before, but Becca managed to make it feel alive. Every beat, every flutter, every skip, it was all for her.
I shook my head at her words. "I'll always choose you, Becca. Every time." I kissed her cheek softly and she smiled, sighing happily as she rested her head on my shoulder.
Mrs. Copper walked into the class a second later and began to teach. Her words washed right over me, I couldn't focus on anything but the girl with her head on my shoulder and hand on my lap.
My mind wandered back to Jenny and her comment about Becca juggling two guys. I knew in my gut she was referring to Parker. I fought the anger that surged up inside me. I refused to let it take control of me anymore. Anger meant losing Becca and I wouldn't let that happen. Whatever Jenny was referring to, Becca would tell me. And even if she didn't, it didn't matter.
I knew every single thing I felt for this girl was being reciprocated, I felt it every time Becca smiled at me, kissed me or even just touched me. I was ready to dive in right in, not wanting to waste another minute. I was feeling everything and I desperately wanted to tell her that. But Becca was different. She needed time to think, to understand. Time to come to her own conclusions about our relationship and how she felt. And that was fine, I would give her time.
I knew that when the time was right she would give her heart to me completely and I would be waiting eagerly to accept it.
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Please vote for this story :)
What do you guys think Jenny was talking about when she made that comment? Will another wedge come between Brett and Becca? The story is far from over. Right now, everything is fine and peachy, but drama awaits! xo