(A/N: I didn't hit 400 votes but I can't withold a chapter from you guys! :) I just get so excited when I finish writing - I had to post it! Thank you for trying to get me those votes though! Love you all!)
Distance (feat. Jason Mraz) – Christina Perri
Holding on and Letting Go – Ross Copperman
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It's Monday now, two days since that rough night. Zayn hasn't called or tried to apologize since then. I had hoped he'd be waiting outside the dorm room after Sarah and I got back from church the other day like before, but no such luck. I wasn't going to be the one to cave and call him.
I couldn't be the one to cave. He was so infuriating, him and Erica. The main thing that's been on my mind, I woner if he had gone and found her after leaving the room. I wonder what would have happened if I went after him - we'd probably would have gotten into a bigger fight.
I had stayed the rest of the night with Sarah. She didn't ask any questions, no one did. Thankfully Harry kept me some good company, we argued a lot about laser tag – mostly because of how drunk I was.
Sarah hasn't asked me anything about her birthday party since then, which I feel awful for ruining with my drama. It wasn't all my fault though, at least I don't think it was. I did provoke him with Harry, but it wouldn't have started if he hadn't invited Erica.
He doesn't show up for psychology and I find myself wondering if he got into another fight. My thoughts were being invaded by him again – like always. Classes fly by, the week flies by and before I know it it's Wednesday and he's still not in class.
I use most of my time to dance my frustrations and confusions away. I would dance until I thought I was going to collapse, getting my anger out the best I could. But it would only help momentarily.
When I would see Sarah and Niall my mind would go crazy with frustration. Why couldn't Zayn and I be that simple? Why couldn't I just forget about him and move on to some one else?
"Hey Jules." I turn to Sarah who gives me a small smile. "I'm headed out to dinner, you good?" I glance at the desk where my books are spread out.
"Yeah..." I breathe. "Oh wait Sarah!" I call to her, jumping out of my seat as she reaches for the door. She turns to me with arched eyebrows.
"What's up?"
"I never gave you my gift..." I trail off, digging through my drawers to find her gift - the gift I hid from her so she wouldn't stumble upon it.
"Oh Jules, you didn't have to." She smiles at my gift. I hand it out to her, it's tightly wrapped in a light glittering pink wrapping with a light orange bow wrapped around it. She takes it in her hand and shakes her head. "I shouldn't accept a gift from you Jules."
"Sarah, you buy me dresses, open it." I say sternly, a smile on my lips though. She rolls her eyes,
"Well if you insist." She laughs, setting down her purse and walking to the counter. She quickly unwraps the gift and looks at the picture frame. In the frame is a picture of Sarah and I from dance class - where we first became friends.
I see the small tears gather in her eyes as she covers her mouth with her fingertips. "Oh Jules." She breathes, shaking her head.
"There's also a little coupon on the back of the frame." I point to my written note. "It's a written statement saying I'll go shopping with you without complaining, only once though!" I clarify as she hugs me tightly.
"Jules this is perfect!" She exclaims releasing me. "And I'm going to take you up on that shopping date." She smiles, wiping her eyes as she puts the picture frame onto her desk. "Listen... I'm not going to ask about my party at the frat house... I just want you to know I'm here for you." She gives a small smile.
I reply with a similar smile she holds, she slowly lowers her eyes. Clearing her throat she excuses herself, setting the picture down onto her desk and leaves me in the dorm to myself. Taking with her the moment that had managed to take my mind off of Zayn.
Wednesday after classes I find myself staring at my phone. For a few hours I just simply stare at it, the large screen taking up the phone, the small home button at the bottom. Eventually I pick up the phone and unlock it. I scroll through my contacts, I scroll past all the names until I see Matt's name. I know I won't call him but I find myself staring at his name, my finger hovering above the call button.
He understood me so well, he was always there for me up until that awful night I found out about him cheating. If nothing had happened, if he hadn't cheated... things would be so simple right now.
As I find my finger slowly descending onto the call button my phone begins vibrating from an incoming call, causing me to jump in my seat. I stare at the number for a moment. The chills on my body from being startled slowly calming as I let out a light breath.
"Hello?" I answer the unknown number.
"Jules?" I hear the light British voice ask into the receiver.
"Um yeah, hi?" I pull at my hair as I shift into my seat.
"It's Louis." My eyes open more at his name. Why was he calling me? I hope it's not about Zayn, I hope everything is alright.
"Hi." My voice is light and scared with the possibility of the reason behind the call.
"Do you have time to grab some dinner tonight?" Dinner, why would he want to grab dinner with me?
"Uh, sure." I nod though he can't see it.
"Great, how about we meet at Applebees in a half hour?"
"Sounds like a plan, see you there."
"Later Jules." The call ends and I find myself sitting in my seat in silence.
I think of possibilities of why he wanted to get dinner with me. Did Zayn fight him? Is Zayn okay? Is Zayn in trouble? If it doesn't have to do with Zayn what else could it be? Is Liam alright? Is Harry alright? Did him and Eleanor break up? Too many questions for me to handle so I decide to go to Applebees early.
Getting out of the car to go into the restaurant is a strange change of temperature. It's officially October today and the weather is getting colder. The sun provides barely any heat when it's out, the cold air chilling it's hot temperature.
I get a table by the window and stare at the menu, memorizing it. I stare at the food and how perfect it looks, I read the descriptions of each food – not really feeling too hungry with the nerves of this dinner coming.
I begin bouncing my legs to get rid of the nerves. Clasping my hands together and picking at my nails. I control my breathing the best I can, controlling my nervous thoughts to the best of my abilities.
"Well look who's early." I look up to Louis who slides into the booth with a smile. His hair is styled in a faux hawk and he wears a jean jacket over his blue shirt.
"Hi." I offer my best smile as he steals the menu from me. I decide to wait until we order to get down to business. "So how are you?"
"Seen better days, you?" he doesn't look up from his menu, his blue eyes reading over the options.
"Just about the same." I concur with his statement. Louis shoots me a kind smile and clears his throat. "So we going on that laser tag date/hang out thing anytime soon?" I had completely forgotten about that laser tag deal with Harry. I feel guilty remembering about that, how I twisted our agreement to play laser tag into a date to shove it in Zayn's face.
"I don't know, are we?" I ask back.
"Yeah I haven't sorted the details yet, but we'll probably do that soon." I bite my lip as the waiter comes over to take our order. I get a sandwich while Louis gets a hamburger and a milkshake. Wiping my mouth in anticipation I straighten up in my seat as Louis clears his throat.
"So you're probably a tad antsy, aren't you?" Louis smiles at me. I'm sure I must look nervous to him. I'm bouncing my legs, biting my lip, trying to act as if I'm not, which only adds to it.
"A little." I admit quickly. I just want him to tell me what is happening. "So what's going on? Are you okay? Is everything okay?" I really want to ask if Zayn's okay but I don't want to jump into that.
"Things have been... decent." He shrugs. "I'm worried 'bout you and Zayn though." He says with concern painting his face. His eyebrows are low and his eyes are carefully watching me like a doctor examines a patient.
I'm not sure why I care so much about Zayn. He wasn't my type, I wasn't his, we didn't get along unless we were making out it would seem. I shouldn't care about him, but he's engraved into my heart, into my every thought and emotion.
"Worried about us?" I try to act as if I didn't have a single idea what was going on. I put a smile on my face and wide eyes with question. He sees through it though because he gives me a come on look.
"He won't talk to anyone in the house. He's staying at his aunts right now I just... I'm worried. He's never shut me out this much before." Louis runs his hands through his hair and I feel guilty in knowing that I was the one to push Zayn to do this. I lick my lips and take a small breath, looking down.
"I haven't spoken to him since the party." I murmur quietly staring at the wooden table. Memorizing the lines on it. The way the cruves occur in the light wood. The smooth surface cool under my fingertips.
"What happened at the party? You two seemed to be doing great and then... nothing." I'm quiet for a moment. I don't really want to respond, I didn't really know if I could trust Louis with my thoughts and ordeals. I couldn't talk to Sarah about it, she would flip out and get Niall involved.
"He um..." I run my hands through my hair and finally look up at Louis who is waiting for my answer. "I met Erica..."
"Ah Erica... she's usually the one for drama, she lives for that shit." Louis informs me with a pout on his lips. I don't feel comforted by his words – only more worry fills me. Zayn's been with a girl that lives off drama and looks like a model – fantastic.
"Yeah well... we had a fight over her." I shrug, trying to act like it wasn't a big deal. Louis slowly nods as if he knew the entire thing.
"When don't you two fight? I mean, Zayn's always pissed about something, but lately it's always about you." Louis picks at some crumbs on the table and his statement causes me to laugh out of the sheer annoyance. "What?" Louis is confused by my laughter.
"He has no right to be angry about me. He is the reason all this happens." I mutter the last part under my breath but Louis hears it.
"Listen if it helps him and Erica haven't seen each other too much lately... She just kind of shows up when she wants, she's pretty entitled and selfish. In my opinion I don't think Zayn invited her – I think she invited herself assuming Zayn would want her there." Louis' insight on the dilemma helps, I gather that's what Zayn meant by 'that's just her personality'.
But Louis didn't see Zayn's guilty face when she showed up. He didn't hear what she said to him and how she said it. I don't know what to believe, I want to believe she showed up on her own but something tells me it wasn't true.
"So was I overreacting?" I ask lightly. Louis raises an eyebrow and chews on his lip.
"Well that depends, what happened?" I take a deep breath and begin to explain the other night to Louis.
"Well Zayn and I are... You know figuring things out I guess you could say – no labels." I grumble the 'no labels' part with distaste. "And things have been going pretty well..." I trail off, things had been going great, amazingly. The date, the phone call, the kisses.
"Yeah I figured, he'd been pretty chipper – as chipper as Zayn can get." Louis laughs to himself.
"Anyways... I guess it kind of started when I was planning on going home for Sarah's birthday. He shut me out for a little bit... He said it was because he thought I would see that I miss my old 'perfect' life." I use air quotes and roll my eyes at his idiotic assumption.
"Right, sounds like Zayn." Louis nods. I'm thankful that Louis knows Zayn and can understand his thinking – at least more than others.
"Well we talked on the phone and sorted that stuff out. I came back for Sarah's party things were great. I was surprised by how smooth things were going by his-"
"Public display of affection?" Louis fills in with a smirk. I blush with Louis giving me that look of I saw.
"Yes." I mumble and shake my bashfulness away. "Then Erica showed up and I found out they had been hooking up... Then he got mad because Charles told me and told me to leave and... We fought about how we're not a couple so we should be allowed to do what we want. He told me to leave and we fought more and I kind of..." I look down at the table ashamed of my words, "lied to him about going on a date with Harry."
"Good." Louis response surprises me. I look up to him with wide and confused eyes. "Zayn needs to know if he gets to be a free agent so should you. He doesn't get to keep you to himself and still have other girls around." Louis explains. "He deserves to sit in some hot water."
I smile at Louis for his understanding and his non-biased opinions on the situation. Although confused how he could not be biased.
"You don't think that was bad of me to do?" My voice hopeful in the fact that I could possibly not be at fault here.
"No it was bad." He shakes his head. "But Zayn deserved it. If he's serious about you he needs to stop with the secretive shit. I mean I understand people got pasts but that's just it, we all have pasts."
If only he understood Zayn's past though. I didn't really understand much of it - since he has hardly shared anything about it. Though I had a feeling Louis didn't know about Zayn's dad.
"He also needs to tell Erica they're done – at least as hook ups." I didn't like the idea of Erica and Zayn still being friends but then again, I didn't have much control over the situation.
"What do you think I should do?" I ask. My head swarming with thoughts but no productive ideas to help. I rub between my eyes and let out a heavy breath, waiting for Louis.
"Give him some space – show him you won't come crawling back to him. He needs to realize that he doesn't have you all to himself." Louis shrugs as if the answer were simple. As I'm about to answer our food is brought to us and Louis is all too joyful about it.
I decide to wait to finish our discussion so we can eat in peace. I take a bite out of my sandwich, realizing how hungry I am I eat the rest of it quickly.
"Hungry much?" Louis laughs at me. I smile and take a drink from my water.
"Little bit." I hadn't been able to eat lately, I had been too consumed with my thoughts. "Should I call him? He hasn't been in class lately." I voice my concern.
"If he wants to ditch class let him. Don't contact him Jules, I mean it." He points a finger at me in warning. "He needs to see that he has to put work into this."
Did Louis forget he was the one who apologized the first time after messing up? Apologizing – something Zayn hated to do because of his dad.
"Right." I mumble.
"He'll come around. What's that saying... distance makes the heart grow fonder?" Louis looks up at the ceiling and pulls his lips pull in strange directions as he thinks.
"Yeah I think that's the saying." I assure him, laughing a bit at his facial expressions.
"Well let him miss you a bit." The problem was I missed him – a lot. I clear my throat as my phone begins vibrating. I feel hope rush through me that it's Zayn but I read the name on my phone and frown.
"Excuse me." I get up from the table and walk outside into the cool autumn air.
"Hi mom." I say, hoping she can't detect my irritation. She doesn't.
"You never called us." Her voice is harsh and angry. Oh shoot, I was supposed to call them the day after Sarah's birthday party, Zayn had just taken over my thoughts so much I forgot about that.
"I'm sorry. I got really distracted. I had to plan Sarah's surprise party so I've been dealing with all that." I mumble into the phone.
"Is everything okay Jules? Maybe you should come home this weekend." She offers. I want to scoff at her idea, going home was the last thing I wanted to do.
"No it's okay." I lie, I bite on my nail as I begin to pace outside the restaurant. "I'm just distracted lately."
"I can tell... You left Sarah's birthday party without warning and then left back to Boulder without warning too." Her voice growing agitated. I roll my eyes, thankful she can't see me.
"I know I started to feel sick at Sarah's birthday party so I took Jeremy home." I try my best to lie.
"Well are you coming down any time soon?" I groan at the question and I know if I were actually in front of my mother she would be giving me a warning look.
"Listen mom I'm out with a friend at dinner right now. Can we talk later?" I stare up the sky, praying she'll hang up.
"A friend?" her voice perks up. "A friend that isn't Sarah?"
"I have other friends mom, I'm not a complete loser." I mumble.
My mom had always thought I lost all my friends since I broke up with Matt. I just stopped trying, I was going to college and if they were only going to treat me like a baby about Matt I found no point in remaining friends with them.
"I never said that." Her tone sharp. "Have a nice time Jules." I hear her smile on her voice as she hangs up.
I roll my eyes and stuff my phone into my pocket, walking back inside. Within the time of my phone call the sun had set and it was getting dark out. Louis leans back in his chair, his plate completely cleared of any food.
"Who was it?" He nods towards the phone in my hand.
"My mom." I sigh sitting down, resting my chin on my hand as Louis nods slowly.
"Right well... I just want you to know that I'm here if you need anything Jules." He gives me a warm smile that comforts me somewhat.
"Thanks." I mumble through my smile.
"If you have any questions just call me... I'll make sure Zayn's in class tomorrow just so you know ahead of time." He smiles as he begins to stand up. I follow his lead and grab my things. "We should do that laser tag thing this weekend." Louis proposes.
"Sure." I'm not sure if I'm up for that, I still feel guilty using Harry to make Zayn angry. "Just text me the details." I put on a smile for Louis who watches me with worry.
"Alright." He nods. "I'm here if you need to talk, remember that Jules." He flashes a childish smirk and hugs me. I smile and hug him back tightly, glad I wasn't alone with my issues with Zayn, thankful to have Louis who understood more than others. "Eleanor was excited to hear about the laser tag idea, she might actually win the thing." He laughs waving goodbye to me.
"Bye Louis." I smile, his ability to pick up my spirits was incredible. Though I'm still troubled with Zayn, Louis is helping me see some light in the situation.
I climb back into my car and take a deep breath. I run my hands along the steering wheel, closing my eyes and taking another deep breath. I quietly repeat what Louis had said, "Distance makes the heart grow fonder."
Only problem was - I wasn't sure how long I could keep my distance.
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As always, please vote! :)
(A/N: Awww, I like writing Louis and Juliet's friendship, do you guys like them as friends?)