Today is Friday and we've been home since Sunday and things have been going okay. We have all decided to put the card Emma got from Sara to the side. We figured it was just a thing she did for her birthday. We haven't heard or seen Sara since then so we're just going to leave it at that.
Emma has her driver's test today and she has been practicing all week with Jimi. We canceled home school with Maggie today so she can focus on her test. Her test is at 10:00 this morning and its 8:30 now. I figured Emma should get up and get ready soon, so I headed upstairs. I passed Elijah and Jimi sitting on the couch watching Jake and the Neverland Pirates. I made it up to Emma's room and opened the door. I walked over to her bed and sat down. Her hair draped over her face and I brushed it out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear. She scrunched her nose a little and her eyes fluttered opened.
"Morning sweetheart" I said softly.
"Morning" she said and yawned.
"Today's the big day. Why don't you get up and get in the shower and get ready and I'll make you some breakfast" I said and she nodded and rolled out of bed.
I walked back down to the kitchen and got out the stuff to make chocolate chip pancakes. Elijah came in and wanted to help. He pulled up the stepstool and stood next to me. I let him stir the batter and pour the pancakes on the pan.
We finished up the pancakes and Emma joined us in the kitchen.
"Breakfast is just about ready" I said and grabbed some plates.
"E, can you go get Daddy" I asked.
"Uh huh" he nodded and ran into the living room and brought Jimi back with him. We sat at the table and ate breakfast.
"Are you ready for your driver's test today Em?" Jimi asked.
"Yeah, I'm nervous though" she said quietly.
"You're going to do fine. You've been practicing for months" he said.
"Just don't think too hard about it" I said and she nodded.
We finished up breakfast and cleaned up the kitchen. It was just before 9:15 and Emma and I decided to head to the DMV. We got there and walked inside. I got the paperwork and filled it out. Emma read through the papers about the test while we waited. Surprisingly, they were on schedule so they called Emma's name right at 10:00.
As soon as they called her name, she looked at me with fear in her eyes.
"You're going to do great sweetie" I said with a smile and she nodded and stood up.
"Good luck" I said and she walked out to the car with the DMV guy.
He said the test was going to take about ten minutes. I think I am more nervous for Emma than she is and she's the one taking the test. I sat in the waiting area and scrolled through Pinterest on my phone. About ten minutes later I saw Emma walk in. She still looked nervous, but she was happy. I stood up as they approached me.
They guy shook my hand and smiled at me.
"Mrs. Westbrook, Emma did great. The only thing she needs to work on is watching her speed. She never went more than five over, but she came close a few times. I took three points off for that, but other than that she did very well. Here is all the forms she will need to get her license at the desk" He said with a smile and handed me the paperwork.
"Thank you so much" I said and shook his hand.
"Thank you" Emma said with a smile.
"Congratulations baby" I said with a huge smile and hugged her.
We went up to the desk and filled out the papers for her license. She got her picture taken and they printed her a temporary license. They explained GDL to her and told her that her actual license will come in the mail in about a week or so. Once we got everything, we walked out to the car.
"How about we go home, tell Dad and Elijah and then go out to lunch?" I suggested and she nodded with a smile.
"Were do you want to go?" I asked.
"Olive Garden" she said immediately and I laughed.
We pulled into the driveway and walked inside. Jimi met us at the door.
"How'd you do?' he asked. Emma pulled out her temporary driver's license and showed it to Jimi.
"I passed!" She said excitedly.
"That's great princess" he said and gave her a big hug and spun her in a circle.
"We were thinking we could go to Olive Garden for lunch to celebrate" I said.
"That sounds like a great idea" Jimi said with a smile.
"Well, I should probably get Elijah dressed if we're going out to lunch" Jimi said.
"He's not dressed yet?" I asked with my eyebrows raised.
"We haven't gotten that far yet" Jimi said with a chuckle. I shook my head and giggled. Then Jimi went in the living room by Elijah.
"Come on little man let's get you dressed" he said and took Elijah upstairs.
They came back down a few minutes later and we headed to Olive Garden. We sat down and ordered our drinks.
"So, Gracie asked me if I could hang out tonight and go to a movie with her and some of her friends from school. Can I?" Emma asked after the waitress walked away.
I looked at Jimi and he shrugged his shoulders and nodded his head.
"I guess so. What movie are you going to see?" I asked.
"Heaven is for Real at 7:15" I said.
"Okay. Who's all going with you?" I asked.
"Gracie, Abby, Maddie, Briana, Josh, and Adam" She said and I nodded. They're a good group of kids so I trust her.
"You're coming home right after the movie, correct?" I asked.
"Yeah" she said and nodded.
The waitress came back and we ordered our food. Emma and I both ordered the chicken Alfredo, Jimi ordered the chicken parmesan and I ordered the chicken tenders off the kids menu for Elijah. We talked until the food came.
When we were done eating, we paid for the bill and left. Elijah wanted to stop at the park on the way home, so we did and then got ice cream.
After a few hours, we decided to head home because Elijah was getting tired. He laid down on the couch and fell asleep as soon as we got home. Jimi went out to the garage to fix something, I'm not really sure what, I don't ask questions anymore. Emma was hanging out in the office on my laptop. I walked in there after I cleaned up the living room a bit.
"What are you up to?" I asked and sat down next to her on the couch in there.
"Nothing, just scrolling through Facebook while my phone charges" she said. We sat there in silence for a few minutes.
"Can I ask you something?" she asked and closed the laptop.
"Sure" I said and faced her.
"How did you know that you had feelings for Dad?" she asked. Well, that's not where I thought this was going.
"Well, um, I don't know. I guess I had always had feelings for him" I said not really sure how to answer that. I had always had feelings for Jimi. I just could never do anything about it until I divorced Mark.
"But, what does it feel like? To have feelings for someone?" she asked.
"Well, when I was around your Dad, my heart always started racing and my hands would get clammy. I struggled to find words to say when I was around him." I listed with a smile.
"Does it still feel that way?" she asked.
"Yeah, it does. Except for the speech thing" I said and giggled.
"How did you tell him how you felt?" she asked. I think she's asking more for advice rather than just wanting to know.
"Well, we were living together for a few months after my divorce since I had nowhere to go. We became really close. One night we were sitting on the couch and I kissed him" I said. Her eyes widened.
"Seriously?" she asked.
"Seriously" I said with a smile.
"What did he do?" she asked intrigued.
"He told me he loved me" I said and she smiled. We sat in silence for a second.
"Why do you ask?" I asked her, wanting to know why she was so curious.
"Well...umm... You know Josh right?" she asked slowly. I knew it was about a boy.
"I do" I said and nodded for her to continue.
"Well, I think he's really cute and I think I like him. We've hung out a lot in groups and stuff, but I don't know if he likes me and I don't know what to do" she said.
"Well, the only way to find out is to talk to him" I said, but I don't think she liked that response.
"What am I supposed to say to him?"
"Maybe find out what he's interested in and see if you guys have anything in common and take it from there" I said hoping that will help a little.
"Okay" she said with a nod.
A few minutes later, we heard Jimi come inside. I went to go see what he was up to and Emma followed.
"Emma, you got a letter" he said as he was sorting the mail. He handed it to her and she looked at the envelope.
"Who's it from?" I asked.
"I don't know, there's no name on the return address. It's just the address" she said and opened it. She pulled the letter out and started reading it. She looked angry. When she was done, she threw it in the trash and ran up to her room. I'm a little worried.
"What do you think that was about?" Jimi asked and I shrugged my shoulders. I pulled the letter out of the trash and read it.
My dearest Emma,
I hope that you had a wonderful birthday. There are so many things I want to tell you, but I don't know where to start so I'm just going to start writing.
I grew up just outside of Franklin. I came from a very strict home with very over protective parents. There were lots and lots of rules. I always obeyed the rules while I was growing up. I was very sheltered and didn't get to see much of the world. I only saw what my parents showed me. When I was 16, I had my first real boyfriend. He was a year older than me. He showed me that there is more to the world. I started rebelling against my parents. The biggest thing I did that set them off was coming home pregnant at 16. They thought I was throwing my life away. I begged to differ because it brought me you. My parents wanted me to get an abortion and tried to force me to go to the doctor. I made quiet the scene at the doctor's office let me tell you. They said they weren't giving me an unwanted abortion so we left. That really ticked my parents of because having a baby at 16 was not part of their plan for me. The plan they created without me. They went to a lawyer and got all the necessary forms to sign my parental rights away. I of course didn't want to, but they eventually convinced me that it would be in everyone's best interest to give you up for adoption. My parents told me they were looking for a family to give you to. Little did I know, they were only saying that so I would sign the papers.
Just after my 17th birthday, I went into labor. 13 long, painful, hours later, I heard your tiny cries. The nurses cleaned you off and papers were shoved in my face to sign. I signed the papers and then they brought you back out. They laid you in my arms. You were the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I never wanted to let you go, but I had to. 24 hours later, someone from DCFS came and took you away. The only thing I had left was the picture they took of you right after you were born. I had never felt so empty in my life. About 7 years later, my mom and I got into a big fight and she told me that you went to foster care the day you were born. I was so mad. I immediately went to find you. I needed to know that you were okay. I spent years trying to track you down. The first lead I had was four years later when I saw in Country Weekly that you were adopted. I knew right when I saw that picture, it was you. You looked just like me at that age. I was relieved to know that you were with a loving family. I spent a lot of time and money on concert tickets hoping I would see you. A couple years later, I was on a run and I ran passed a park and I saw you with your parents and little brother. I wanted so badly to stop and say hi, but I didn't have the courage. I finally came up with the courage to talk to you when I found out you were in a talent show.
I promise I'm not trying to take you away from your family. I just want to get to know you and I hope that one day you give me the chance.
Just know that I never stopped loving you.
Sara
I set the letter on the counter. I was speechless. That is a lot to take in, especially for a sixteen year old.
"Who's it from?" Jimi asked.
"Sara" I said quietly. I saw the anger growing in his eyes.
"Read it" I added. He picked up the letter. When he was done he took in a deep breath.
"Wow" he said.
"Yeah" I whispered and approached him. I buried my face in his chest and let out a deep breath. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. We stood like that for a few minutes. I pulled away from Jimi and looked up at him. He leaned down and kissed me.
"Everything is going to be fine" he said in a soothing voice.
"I'm going to go check on her" I said and he nodded. Elijah was starting to wake up from his nap as I passed the couch.
I made my way up the stairs to Emma's room. Her door was closed so I knocked on it lightly.
"Come in" I heard her say. I opened the door and walked in. She was laying down on her bed on top of the covers, facing away from the door. I walked in and sat down on her bed. She rolled over and faced me while still laying down. I brushed the hair out of her face.
"Are you okay?" I asked softly.
"I think so. It was just a lot to take in" she said and I nodded.
"Are you still going to go to the movie tonight?" I asked.
"Yeah, I'm not going to let all this get to me" she said.
"That sounds like a good idea" I said with a smile.
We decided to go downstairs and hang out with Elijah and Jimi until dinner.
After dinner, Emma went upstairs to get ready for her movie. She came back down with a pair of dark skinny jeans with black knee-high boots, a light gray long sleeve V-neck t-shirt and a patterned scarf.
"Are you ready to leave?" I asked.
"Yep" she said with a smile.
"Alright, here are the keys" I said and handed them to her.
"Drive safe. I love you" I said and hugged her.
"Don't crash the car" Jimi said.
"I won't" she said and rolled her eyes. Then she headed out the door. I can't believe she is driving.
I sat back down next to Jimi on the couch. He wrapped his arm around me and I rested my head in the crook of his neck.
"I can't believe our little girl is driving" I said quietly.
"Me either" he said and pulled me closer.
Elijah came out of the playroom and climbed up on my lap.
"Can we watch Batman?" He asked.
"Sure bud" Jimi said. He got up and put the movie in. About halfway through the movie, Elijah fell asleep in my lap. I looked over at Jimi and he was asleep with his arm around me. I just laughed to myself.
The movie finished up and I turned it off and turned on the regular TV and had the volume low. I left Jimi and Elijah the way they were, not wanting to disturb them. Around 10:00, Emma walked through the door. She hung the keys up and took her shoes off and made her way to the couch.
"Hey sweetie, how was the movie?" I whispered.
"It was so good" she said quietly.
"So... you know how I said I liked Josh?" She asked with a smile.
"Yeah" I said with a growing smile.
"He asked me to go to his prom with him" she said getting more excited.
"That's great sweetie" I said.
"Huh... what's great?" Jimi said in a groggy voice.
"Emma got asked to prom at Gracie's school" I said.
"With a boy?" He asked in his protective father voice.
"Yes, that's usually how it works. His name is Josh" Emma said excitedly.
"Oh Jeez" he mumbled under his breath and ran his other hand over his face. Emma and I giggled.
"I'm going to go up to bed" She said quietly and stood up.
"Okay. Good night sweetie. I love you" I said.
"I love you too" she said.
"Good night kiddo, I love you" Jimi said.
"I love you too" she said and walked up the stairs.
"She got her driver's license and was asked to Prom all in the same day... I don't think I was prepared for that" Jimi said and chuckled.
"I wasn't either" I said and smiled and kissed him.
"Why don't we head up to bed" I said quietly and he nodded. I carefully stood up trying not to wake Elijah. I walked slowly up the stairs and took him to bed. He is a ridiculously heavy sleeper, so I was able to change him into his pajamas without waking him. I put him to bed and kissed his forehead. I closed his door so it was just barely open. I walked down the hall to mine and Jimi's room. He was crawling into bed. I went into the bathroom and took my makeup off and washed my face. I brushed my teeth and put on a pair of athletic shorts and a t-shirt. I walked back into the bedroom and crawled in bed next to Jimi. He scooted closer to me and wrapped his arms around me. I nuzzled into him and closed my eyes and eventually drifted to sleep.
A week later, Kimberly and I are taking Emma to go dress shopping. As soon as I told Kimberly that Emma got asked to prom, she freaked out and said she was coming dress shopping with us whether we liked it or not.
Emma was upstairs getting ready and Kimberly had just walked in the door along with Jimi and the mail. He was looking through it and stopped when he came across something. He looked up at me with wide eyes.
"It's another letter for Emma" he said.
"Again?" I asked, kind of annoyed and he nodded.
"What's going on?" Kimberly asked.
"Sara keeps sending letters to Emma. It's starting to get annoying now" I said.
"How is Emma handling it?" she asked.
"I think she's okay. It doesn't seem to bother her as much as it did when she first showed up" I said.
"That's good" she said. Then we heard Emma come running down the stairs.
"I'm ready to go" she said with a smile.
"You got another letter" I said slowly. Jimi handed it to her. She looked at it for a second then set it on the counter without opening it.
"I'll read it later. Can we go please?" She asked.
"Of course. Let's go" I said.
Kimberly, Emma and I walked out to the car in the garage.
"So, what kind of dress do you have in mind?" Kimberly asked.
"I don't really know. I don't think I want a big fluffy princess dress though" she said.
"We'll help you find the perfect one" I said and looked at her in the rear view mirror.
We pulled up to a dress store on Broadway. We walked in and started looking around. A woman approached us to help out. We walked around and looked at all the different dresses for about an hour. We picked out five dresses that she liked for her to try on. Kimberly and I sat down on the couch outside of the fitting rooms. A few minutes later, she walked out.
"Can you help me zip it" She said and walked over to me. I stood up and zipped it the rest of the way. Then she stood up on the platform. The woman who was helping us, showed us where the dress would need to be hemmed and taken in. The dress looked great on her.
"What do you think sweetie?" I asked.
"I like it" she said with a smile.
"Why don't you try on the other dresses too before you make a final decision" I said and she nodded her head.
She went back in the dressing room and tried on the rest of her dresses. After she was done she went back in and tried on her favorite one more time. It was a strapless blush pink dress with a sweetheart neckline. There were crystals around the waist. It flowed down to the floor. It was a very elegant dress. She wasn't into the big puffy princess dresses and this one is her style. The best part of about this dress is that it is exactly her size and we don't have to get it hemmed or taken in.
"I really like this one" she said with a smile.
"I do too" I said.
"You look beautiful sweetie" Kimberly said.
"Thanks" she said with a smile.
"Why don't you go get changed and we'll find you some shoes and jewelry" I said. She stepped off the platform and walked back into the dressing room. She bought out all the dresses and hung the other ones on the rack to be put back. The sales woman took the dress we were getting and took it up to the counter while we found shoes and jewelry. They were having a sale where you get twenty-five percent off shoes and jewelry if you buy a dress.
We found her a pair of silver sparkly heals and a pair of earrings and a necklace. We got ready to check out and then we went out to lunch. After we ate, we headed back home. Kimberly left and Emma and I went inside. Emma still didn't open the letter she got from Sara. She left it sit on the counter. I wasn't going to pester her about it. She will read it if she wants to. I think she just needs to work out this whole thing with Sara on her own and we will support whatever decisions she decides to make. I just hope she's not bottling it up.