Michael's POV
It's been a week since Leanne and I both got home from the hostpital and today's my first day back at work, but I have mixed feelings about it. I'm glad thing's are starting to get a little back to normal, but I'm still worried about leaving Leanne at home without me. Janet agreed to stay with her until I get back, but I still feel weird leaving her alone.
I'm in my office doing some research on this 'grandmother' of Leanne's and Randy walks.
"What are you doing here?" He frowns walking over to me. "I do work here you know" I chuckle slightly. "I know that" he rolls his eyes at me. "I meant. Don't you think it's a little soon to be back at work?"
"I'm fine" I shrug. "Mike. You and your girlfriend just got blown up and it's a miracle you guys are even alive! Don't you wanna take some time off" he says softly. "I'm fine. Honestly we just wanna try and get back to normal" I mutter. "What's this?" He frowns confused looking at the folder the police gave me.
"You remeber what I told you about Kelly and Alex?"
"How can I not!? And how you managed not to kill those sick fuckers is beyond me" he scrunches his face. "Trust me. I wanted to more than anything" I scrunch my face in disgust remembering that day.
"So what does this have to do with them?" He asks confused and I tell him about the deal the police made with me for help I them. "So that's how you knew where they were buried" he says looking through the file then pauses and his face goes pale and I instantly know what part he's reading. "Is this for real!?" He widens his eyes and I nod "does Leanne know?"
"No. And you can't tell her either. She doesn't know about this all she knows Is that the police told me where her parents are. Please don't say anything" I ask and he nods. "Maybe you should keep all this stuff here. You don't want Leanne finding this" he suggests. "You don't think I'm wrong for not telling her?"
"Will any good come out of it?" He asks and I shake my head. "There you go then. If she thinks her parents died instantly and felt no pain then let her think that. Knowing what really happened will only traumatized the girl more than she already has been" he smiles at me through pursed lips and continues reading the rest then frowns confused. "Leanne has a grandmother? She never mentioned it before"
"She mentioned her a little, but as far as she was aware she died when she was like 9" I frown still unsure about this.
"Do you think you should tell her?"
"I haven't mentioned it yet. After what happened with Kelly and Alex, I wanna check she really is her grandmother and whether or not she's a threat to Leanne or not before I say anything" I explain and he nods. "You think it could be a mistake?"
"I'm not sure. Everything else in there checks out an I've been doing some research and she seems to be legit" I say, turning my laptop around to show him what I've found in her"
"She does look like her. Especially the eyes and the smile" he agrees with the same thought I had. "It says she's living in a nursing home not to far for here" I tell him. "Are you gonna go and see her?"
"I don't know" I mumble and he looks at me confused "why not? If Leanne has a grandmother out there I'm sure she'd wanna know she still had blood family out there other than that twisted aunt and..."
"Does she really need anymore people coming into her life?" I cut him off "and if she is her grandmother then why hasn't Leanne seen her since she was a little girl? And why would she let Mary take custody of her? I don't know her and for all we know she might be just as fucked up as Mary! You know? Mother like daughter and all that"
"Was Leanne's father abusive and involve her in anything sexual?" He asks an I frown shaking my head. "No. He was a great dad. Leanne tells me these little stories every now and then about her parents and from the sounds of it they were really loving and careing towards her and from the stories they were really sweet people" I smile slightly, remembering something she told me about them.
"Then you can't blame this on this Maria woman" he says bringing me from my thoughts. "If she's so innocent then where has she been all these years?" I shrug still not sure what to do.
"Well only she can answer that when you go and visit her"
"I never said I'd meet her" I shake my head. "Call up the nursing home and try and see if you can meet with her. Today if possible. You have all these questions, but unless you talk to her you'll never get the answers"
"But what about Leanne? And I'm working and.. "
"Leanne's with Janet she's fine and as for work. I'll cover for you" he cuts me off and I don't say anything for a moment.
"I can't just turn up. What am I supposed to say?" I shrug. "Say whatever you want. If you don't do this now then you'll never do it"
"Maybe I don't want to?" I mumble "why wouldn't you want her to know?" He asks and I don't say anything for a moment.
"I'm scared she'll leave me ok?" I confess and he looks at me confused as I continue. "Leanne hasn't seen her since she was a little kid and from what she told me she was really kind and sweet and loving towards her just like her parents were and I'm scared that once she finds her grandma she'll wanna go straight over there and then more people show up and..."
"Mike, you can't do that to her" he cuts me off "I get you not telling her what really happened to her parents, but to not tell her about her grandma because your scared that she won't just have you in her life anymore is just cruel and..."
"Selfish! I know, but everytime somebody comes into her life they hurt her. Yes I've hurt her too, but not purposely not like the others did and I'm not gonna let anybody else hurt her again. I can give her all the love she could ever need and anything else she wants she can have it. She doesn't need anybody else. When it's just the two of us we're happy. We're so happy and everything's perfect and she'd never hurt me, just like I'd never hurt her. We don't need anybody else and.."
"You both needed me" he cuts me off. "If it wasn't for me encouraging you then you and Leanne wouldn't be where you are today and if I hadn't found her at the bus shelter the night she ran away then who knows what would have happened to her and if it wasn't for the rest of the family then you'd be dead of an overdose by now and you an Leanne never would have met and she'd still be there right now and there's so many more examples I could give you right now and..."
"And I'm truly greatful and thankful for all that" I mumble. "I'm not asking you for thanks. I'm asking you to understand. Just like I understand your fears about other people coming into Leanne's life, but you need to understand that you can't be the only person in that girls life. Sometimes we need help from others and there's nothing wrong with that" he says softly and I don't answer him for a moment.
"What if Leanne doesn't even want to meet the woman again?" I shrug. "Then that's her decision to make not yours" he says and I nod not saying anything. Knowing he's right.
I know I can't just keep Leanne locked away from everybody forever, but the thought of her leaving me or somebody hurting her again terrifies me.
"Why don't you call the nursing home and ask to see Maria? If she is her grandma then Leanne seeing her again could really be good for her" Randy says bringing me from my thoughts. "But what if she's not? What if it turns out she's just like Mary?" I say nervously. "If you genuinely believe this woman could be a danger to Leanne is some way then fair enough don't tell her, but if you meet her and it turns out she's actually a good person then you have to tell her" he says stern yet softly and I don't say anything for a moment then sigh heavily.
"Where's my phone?" I say looking up the number for the nursing home she's in. "Your doing the right thing" he smiles at me through pursed lips and I sigh heavily and start dialling the number.
****
Leanne's POV
"So how's things going with you and my brother?" Janet asks as I'm making is both some coffee.
"Things are going good" I smile at her through pursed lips. "Especially now he's going back to work" I say, bringing the coffees over and join her at the table.
"Things weren't ok before then?" She asks "they were but..." I pause and sigh slightly. "In some ways I don't want him to gone all day and I think it's too soon, but In others I'm glad he is because he's more himself"
"How do you mean?" She asks confused. "When he's home and he's not doing anything he starts getting down and thinking about everything that's happend in the past. Especially about me. I told him he shouldn't feel guilty about it and it's in the past but..."
"He still blames himself for everything bad that's ever happened to you?" She cuts me off. "How did you know that?"
"Because I know my brother and I know how he gets" she smiles slightly. "I'm just worried that his depression is gonna come back"
"That's always gonna happen from time to time. You do know that right?" She says softly and I nod. "I know, but it doesn't make it any easier seeing him that way"
"It never is. I've seen him go that way many times and I know it hurts" she nods understandably then goes silent for a moment.
"If if asks you something will you be honest with me?"
"Of course" I nod and she sighs heavily "your not just staying with Michael because you feel sorry for him are you?"
"What!? Of course not" I say surprised she'd asks me that. "I just wanted to make sure that's all" she says softly seeing my reaction. "He's been hurt so much already and I just need to know your with him because you truly want to and not just because you feel sorry for him"
"The only reason I'm with Michael is because I love him" I tell her honestly and she smiles at me through pursed lips. "And he loves you too. More than anything"
"And I love him more than anything too... I just wish he'd believe me" I mumble that last part. "What do you mean?" She frowns confused and I tell her about the other night.
"He said he was scared I wouldn't love him anymore if I saw his burns. And it really hurt me that he'd think I wouldn't love him because of something that happened to him that was my fault in the first place"
"The fire wasn't your fault" she says softly, shaking her head. "But it was my fault he went back in there" I croak getting upset "sweetie what happened was down to Lisa not you and not Michael. You two went through so much trauma and blaming yourselves is only gonna make things worst and none of it was either of your fault. And I honestly don't think Michael meant to hurt you when he said he was scared you wouldn't love him anymore. he's was very insecure before that and those burns have only added to it" she says softly "I don't know if he told you, but when Michael was younger he bullied really badly at school and that's when his insecurities and depression all started for him"
"He told me. He even blames himself for that too"
"I still don't understand why he he never told any of us. He just kept it quiet for years" she shakes her head. "He wanted to, but he was scared your brothers would think he was a wuss for not standing up for himself"
"He told you that?" She asks suprised and I nod. "There was four of them and they were alot bigger than him. Of course he couldn't stand up to them all" she frowns. "That's what I told him, but he still blames himself for letting it happened. I know they eventually left him alone, but it still really bothers him" I sigh heavily. "I remeber the day we all found out about it. Jermaine caught the little fuckers in the act and him and the rest of my brothers beat the shit out off them and they ran home crying" she chuckles slightly, making me do the same.
I know it's wrong to laugh about four kids getting their ass's kicked, but from what Michael told me, they made his life hell for years. Even now he's older it still hurts him and nobody deserves to go through what he did, especially a little kid.
****
Michael's POV
I spoke to the nursing home about this Maria woman. They said I couldn't speak with her today because she wasn't feeling to good, but they made arrangements for me to visit her in a few days. I'm still not sure what I'm going to say to her or if I've even want to go at all. Apart of me does because if this is Leanne's grandma then other than Mary, Maria will be the last of Leanne's blood relatives she has and I know she'll want to see her, especially after the things she's told me about her when she was little, but I'm still unsure about the whole situation.
I have alot of questions and doubts about her and why if they were so close why she just disappeared from Leanne's life and a whole bunch of other stuff and like Randy said, the only way to find out is to go and see her for myself, but when I first met Mary I thought she was a really nice woman and Leanne was happy and willing about living with her aunt an working in her brothel and it turned out I was completely wrong on both, just like I was with Kelly and Alex and Lisa and alot of other people and I'm scared that this woman will be exactly the same. Even though I'm scared Maria won't turn out to be who I think she is, I'm also scared that she really is this kind an sweethearted person and I know I sound selfish thinking this, but I'm also scared that if Leanne finds out her grandma is still alive then she'll leave me and the thought of losing Leanne in anyway terrifies me. Right now I'm the only person Leanne really has and the more people that come into her life then the more chance I have of losing her. I know I'm selfish for thinking this way, but I can't help the way I feel.
When I get home Leanne and Janet are sitting on the sofa playing video games. "Hey! Your back" Leanne smiles and walks straight over to me. "Hey!" I smile back pecking her lips and pull her close to me "I think that's my cue to leave you guys to it" Janet smiles. "You don't have to go" I tell her "it's fine. I have some stuff to do" she smiles. "Thanks for today" Leanne turns to her and gives her a hug. "Anytime" Janet smiles.
"What was all that about?" I turn to Leanne once Janet leaves. "What do you mean?"
"What you said to Janet"
"For staying with me today" she explains and I nod pulling her in for a hug. "I'm sorry I left you for so long. I'll take the day off tomorrow and..."
"No. You'll go to work tomorrow" she cuts me off. "I'd rather stay with you" I mumble "and I'd love for you to stay with me all the time too, but you can't spend everyday worrying about me" she smiles. "You mean that?" You'd really want me around all the time?"
"Of course I would" smiles then looks at me concerned "is everything ok?"
"Mhm" I nod. "It's just been a long day is all"
"It is gettig pretty late. Why don't we get some sleep" she smiles sweetly and I nod, following her upstairs.
Leanne goes into the bedroom to change and like always since we both got back, I go into the bathroom to change.
After locking the door, I take of my shirt to change and to apply the cream the doctors gave me to treat the burns I got. I've been able to get it on my side and my stomach, but I haven't been able to reach my back and when I glance in the mirror I notice not of them seem to be getting any better especially on my back which actually looks like it's getting worst and still really hurts.
There's a knock on the bathroom door and I quickly put my shirt back on and open the door. "Are you ok? You've been in here like 20 minutes" Leanne asks concerned and I nod faking a smile. "Michael what's wrong?" She asks softly and I sigh heavily. "My back still really hurts is all, but I'm fine though" I try to shrug it off. "Have you been using the cream the doctor gave you?"
"I can't reach it" I mumble "but I'm fine really"
"If you couldn't reach, you could have just asked me for help"
"I'm fine really" I shake my head. "No your not. Your in pain and it could be infected" she says softly, taking cream from me and walks behind me and I stand nervously as she helps me take of my shirt.
"Does that feel better?" She asks, gently rubbing the cream on my back and I nod and glance in the mirror confused by her reaction. She's just standing there applying the cream, but doesn't look disgusted or freaked out.
"Why isn't it bothering you?" I ask confused. "Why should it?" She says softly and I don't answer her as she finishes and turns back to face me. "You still look beautiful to me" she smiles and kisses me softly then breaks away. "You have nothing to feel embarrassed or ashamed of" she says softly. "Now hurry up and get changed" she smiles and leaves me to finish getting ready for bed and I stand confused as she leaves the room, completely unfazed by the disgusting sight she just saw. I've been so terrified that if she ever saw it, she'd freak out and run as far away from me as possible, but she just acted like nothing happened and she didn't see anything which confused me even more.