He was temperamental, everyone knew that.
He tended to be hot headed, a match whose flame never extinguished, the hiss of cold water hitting a hot pan.
But he wasn't like that with her. By no means, was he different. He was still a firecracker, the snarky attitude and snorts of indignation and disgust were not lost around her. Nor did he soften around her. Yes, admittedly, he was sweeter. His actions and words a bit more calculated, thought out longer and his words rolled off his tongue a bit slower. It was a special kind of relationship, between you and Draco. One of balance, his bitter to your sweet. But it was a trade off, too, his own take on sweet to your occasional bitter. It had never affected you, though. He had never been indifferent towards you, and that's how you knew things were bad.
It was in the way he greeted you at the platform, a swift light as a feather kiss to your cheek and the slight grip of your waist, almost as if he was scared to touch you. There was more, the gray blue eyes you had been entranced by so many times before now seemed to be a bit dim, hooded over with exhaustion. Even his trademark smirk, or the swift smile that was reserved especially for you, was not visible. It was in the way he clung to his mother a bit more than usual, and the way she had shot you a pleading, almost desperate look as he hopped onto the train next to you.
The way he had taken a seat next to you in the carriage, arms folded on the table and inches away from you. Blaise had raised an eyebrow at you in question, shocked at the lack of usual reunion PDA. You had given him a pointed smile, ignoring it along with Pansy's obvious amusement at the situation. You found yourself studying him, turned on your side slightly as he gazed out the train window. His jawline, still impeccable is more defined, his skin clinging to it. The spots under his eyes are dark, deep sinking bags coloring the white skin. Pink lips, usually so soft, always taunting you to lean over and steal a moment from them, are chapped and dry. Your boy, your Draco, looks anything but okay.
And despite his abrupt and avoiding demeanor, you let it slide, continuing the conversation about summer with Blaise and Pansy and opting to slowly slide your hand across the seat near his leg, in case he snaps out of it.
It isn't until Draco starts engaging that you feel the unfamiliar prickling of your skin. His voice, is foreign too, forced and emotionless, but rough too. The kind of voice Dumbledore uses when he addresses what ever life threatening issue the school and Harry Potter had faced that year, tired and wise and with a thousand other meanings to what exactly he is saying.
"What a pathetic excuse of an school. I think I'd pitch myself off the Astronomy tower if I thought I had to continue for another 2 years." Draco mutters, when Pansy urges him to change into his Hogwarts uniform.
You lift your head at that, turning to give him a look slightly. He's made comments like that before, it was a long going shared joke between you too, the Astronomy Tower being your place. But scanning his face, you can see that there's no hint of joke of other meaning to his word.
Pansy's shrill shriek causes you to jolt and look away from him, sharing a look with Blaise who is smirking at your wide eyed expression.
"Something funny, Blaise? Yeah. We'll see who's laughing when you're in charms class next year." Draco backfires, causing Blaise to roll his tongue along the inside of his cheek in annoyance.
"Draco! Don't say that! Y/N, tell him!" Pansy screeches, causing you to blink rapidly at her. She was so over the top, it startled you even after 6 years.
You open your mouth to reply, but aren't able to get a single word out before she's sputtering again, shaking her head and causing her brown limp locks to move a bit.
"Draco, you can't just leave us like that. It's not- no, you-" "It's not like there's anything keeping me here." Draco cuts her off with a curt look and pistol like voice.
This, causes the slight hint of a smile to slide off your face, your hand on the bench curling together in a fist and pulling back towards you. It was like anything else Draco did around you, subtle and almost unnoticeable to everyone else, except you. You two tended to keep to yourselves, and others often felt left out around you two. But this time, it's as if, you aren't there, you don't exist. You're on the other side of the world.
You feel your eyes blinking at him as he continues to fan off Pansy, and he doesn't seem to notice you shuffling towards the edge of the bench, towards the aisle. Blaise leans his elbows on the table, willing to search your eyes. But you can't meet his gaze. It's a bit muddy, and granted it wouldn't make sense to anyone else, but you're offended. It's as if the air from your lungs has been knocked out, and the bench you've been sitting on is suddenly very, very smaller. You need to get away, get out, walk, pull yourself together. You stand on wobbly legs, bracing your palm on the table but that's when the hallway suddenly goes dark.
There's screaming in the compartment and you can hear Draco calling your name, but your wand is already drawn, staring into the darkness as is disappears and people's screams turn into nervous laughter. You grunt when you take a step forward and smack right into someone's back, blinking.
"What the bloody hell was that?" Draco demands, turning around with fierce eyes to look at you.
You glance back at the bench, when had he gotten up and in front of you?
"You alright, love?" Draco asks urgently, leaning forward and holding your elbow gently, looking you up and down for any injuries. You can't really speak, blinking at him.
"Love?" He asks again, more panic coloring his voice when you don't answer.
"Fine. 'M fine." You mumble, pulling away from him and rubbing your arms up and down.
He frowns at you, but shakes his head after a moment, taking a seat back on the bench and gesturing you to sit down next to him, "Come here, sit."
You shake your head at him and he scowls, the question on his tip of his tongue, but you cut him off like a crisp salvo bullet, "No, Draco. Don't want to keep you here, or anything." You mumble before smirking at him and walking out the compartment.
Later on, in your dorm you find yourself contemplating if you had indeed overreacted to the situation. It was truly, the first time you felt insulted by Draco. Offended. You grunt in irritation, flopping onto your side, facing the door for your shared dormitory. Your roommate is gone, at some welcome back party that you had opted out off. The empty room is a mocking, in a way, to your taunting, echoing thoughts. Maybe, you were being silly. An emotional girlfriend, feeling sad that her boyfriend suddenly didn't need you. It just felt like there was more weight to Draco's words. As if, he didn't want to need you. This time, a sigh escapes your lips as your shut your eyes and quite literally tell yourself to shut the hell up. The door creaks open a few silent beats later, and you shut your eyes tighter, grip tightening on your covers as you shuffle it closer to your face in hope of warding off your roomates drunken ramblings or Salazar forbid, the sounds of her and whatever guest she had brought along.
"How can you breath like that?" A voice mumbles, closer to her than Y/N thought.
She peeks an eye open, feeling no sense of alarm as she can see Draco's pale skin glistening even in the darkness of her room.
"Kind of the point, Draco." You retort, pulling your covers tighter around you and huffing at him.
"Not funny, love." He grunts, taking no notice of the fact that you don't want him there as he shoves your legs over a bit and takes a seat on the edge of your bed next to you.
"Right, my bad, I reckon it's only okay for you to joke about leaving."
The silence fills overpowers the room once again as he leans forward, elbows digging into his knees and head balanced in his palms. "Did I hurt your feelings?" He asks, a moment later.
Your lack of a response gives him his. An exasperated sigh escapes his lips before you feel a hand on your lower legs, on top of the covers but rubbing up and down, " 'M sorry, love. Didn't mean too.."
"Need me? You don't, Draco. Obviously. " You finish, a bitter taste coloring your words.
He sighs again, and you squeal when you feel the covers being pulled back from your body. A gust of chilly air covering your body in goosebumps. "Budge over." He commands, hand coming down on your shoulder and shoving it slightly.
"No. Leave, Draco." You respond, but not with enough tenacity for him to stop. He shoves you over with ease, long legs wrapping around yours and shoulder next to yours.
He reaches an arm to grab the covers and pull them back over before he tries to wrap it around your waist.
"Don't." You grumble, smacking his arm away as you turn on your side away from him.
"Love, c'mon, I'm sorry." He tries again. You don't respond, knowing very well you're acting like as stubborn child.
"Missed you." He says after a moment, and you hiss because Draco knows how to trap you, every damn time.
"Enough to stay at Hogwarts?" You inquire, turning your shoulder to glance at him slightly. He leans forward, taking advantage of the small opening, as his chin rests against your shoulder.
"I missed you enough this summer to stick by your side for an entire lifetime." He mumbles, lips pressed into your shoulder. You turn fully now, on your back and he shifts slightly to hover over you, knuckles rubbing your cheek as he stares down at you.
"You mean that?" You ask softly, peering at him.
He leans down, pressing his lips to your forehead for a few lingering moments, before he clears his throat and speaks, "Mean it, love? I know it. I need you."
It's the way his voice falter a bit at the end, the sound of him swallowing after his confession that you know, it's your Draco speaking to you and not that ghost of the boy you'd seen on the train.
"Mmm, s'good thing I plan on sticking around then, huh?" You ask, reaching up to run your fingers through the soft tufts of his hair.
He laughs at this, a whole hearted Draco genuine laugh, one that fills your heart with warmth. "Very good, darling. 'M sorry, really. Didn't mean too.. I.. Y/N." He splutters, words stumbling out of his mouth and over his tongue.
"Draco, it's alright. It's okay. We're fine. 'M not mad." You mumble, reaching your hand up to cover his mouth.
His lips press against your hand, and you giggle slightly as you pull it away but he grabs it and continues to press sloppy kisses to it.
"Draco-" You whine, pulling at it.
"C'mhere, don't run, just loving on you." He defends with a whine of his own.
"Get over here, Malfoy." You demand, reaching up for him.
He obliges, shuffling over next to you again and his arm wraps around your waist, pulling you to his side and his cheek rubs against the top of your head. "Kiss, please, love." He rasps in a tired voice and you hum, tilting your head up as he miscalculates in the darkness and lets his lips land on your nose.
You stifle a laugh into his collarbone and he humphs in retaliation, letting his fingers wander under your chin to tilt your head back up, "Stop your giggling and give me a proper kiss."
You oblige, leaning up and pressing your lips to his gently. He deepens the sleepy kiss a bit, hand locking in your hair and pulling you closer. He pulls away after a moment, pressng his lips to your forehead as your cuddle closer to his chest.
It's quiet, once again, as your rub your thumb back and forth across his chest and his hand travels up and down your upper arm. "Love? You asleep?" He asks softly.
"Mmmm, almost." You respond.
"Sorry, sorry, go to bed, darling." He soothes.
"You wanna be the little spoon?" You ask, not needing to open your eyes to know he's smirking at you.
He hums gently, almost inaudibly and you pull away before he can protest.
"Budge over." You echo from earlier as he obliges and turns onto his side.
You wind your arm around his waist and he leans back into you, arm encasing yours to him.
"Love you, darling."